He looked up at the moon, smiling to himself, without a care. It was a rare moment for him, considering the fact that he was always afraid now. He couldn't stand to be alone with his thoughts and instead chose to keep himself in the company of women – no, girls, those who didn't know of who he was and would still be willing to stay with him. He could disappear for months at a time and just lose himself in one of the poor whores. That's all they were, whores who he killed later on, just in case, just to be safe.
This latest one was a shy little thing, terrified to death of him rejecting her. Her voice was so timid at points, but at other times it could be forceful, and she always had her bubble-gum hair hanging down, past her shoulders. He gave her a ribbon, black in color, to hold her hair back from her eyes. He loved her, much as he loved his other whores, but he loved her more, because she was like her… Even the way she blushed when he looked at her reminded him of his old love.
He remembered her last words to him… They played in his head more often now, and he thought of them now: "Please, not you too! First Sasuke, then Naruto and Gaara and now you! For once in your life, forget about your past, forget about whatever it is that makes you want to leave us – leave me-, just Forget IT! I don't understand because I haven't been told, good grief! You promised me you'd protect me, you make a 'life promise', remember? If you go now you won't be able to fulfil your promise! Please, just don't leave me…" He bit his lip and tasted blood, his thoughts racing, mind stuttering in an attempt to defend himself from her ghost. But I had to… If you love him then I have to find him for you. I swore to protect you, and that doesn't mean your body but your spirit, too… Kuri -(He smiled at his use of the old nickname)- , your spirit is dying without him… But you? You're my angel… I can't let you die even if it means giving you up.
He sat up, scowling. The girl rushed to him and kneeled at his side.
"Lee-san?"
He glared at her and she shirked away from him, her eyes wide, like a deer's, only more aquamarine. He smiled, feeling sorry for her, and started back towards where he was staying. She followed him, scuttling like a crab to catch up with him, but remained a step or two behind.
On the way back he felt her eyes on him and he pulled her aside, to an alley, and pinned her against the wall, an odd smile on his face. She squeaked her fear but made no louder sound. He laughed, letting her go.
Kuri… What have you done to me? I can't even look at another without seeing your face. Kuri… I think I love you. He sighed and continued on his path, not noticing her hesitation or lack of enthusiasm. Kuri… Why couldn't you have been happy with me? He passed a bustle of normal teenagers, and they laughed at his hair and garb. Kuri, we could have been so happy. We could have taken turns on the missions once our child came and have been married the spring before, just when the blossoms were coming out… Kuri, if you hadn't chosen your Missing-Nin to pine for… I could have loved you better than he.
He stood at the door of his room, his head pounding.
I care about you more than life itself… That's why I'm here, my angel. That's why I'm here.