Willow rubs her eyes, obviously exhausted but trying hard to comprehend. "You're in love with me?"

Buffy moves her head sideways in a lazy figure eight, "Yeah, in a way."

"You aren't making any sense." Willow's head begins to hurt from the emotional toll seeing Buffy has caused as well as the oddball things Buffy is saying. "You either are or you aren't."

"Follow me." Buffy turns and walks away. Willow realizes she needs to move quick or Buffy will disappear again.

Willow falls in line a few steps behind Buffy and is led to the back of the cemetery. Buffy pushes a broken gate open and continues on into the woods. Willow starts to slow her pace, the darkness surrounding her making it hard to find her way through the trees. Buffy notices this and waits for her to catch up, taking her hand and guiding her through the trees slowly. Without thinking, Willow intertwines their fingers together and each girl holds a little tighter.

After about a mile hike, Buffy stops on a hilltop. The stars shine clear over head, helping the moon light up the area with a startling bright light. A small log cabin rests at the bottom of the hill. "You live here?"

"Yeah," Buffy lets go of Willow's hand and starts down. "What's wrong with it?"

Willow doesn't respond. Rather she takes slow steps down the hill, trying to see as much as she could of where Buffy has made her home. Once inside, she realizes just how small it is. There's a twin bed in one corner, a stool next to that with a few books, and a small table and chair with a camping stove. A duffel bag at the foot of the bed serves as a dresser. Willow can't hide the surprise on her face. "On the move a lot?"

"Been here about eight months." Buffy digs through a chest Willow hadn't noticed and produces two beers. She turns and passes one to Willow and digs a bottle out of her duffel. "I don't require much."

"So I see," Willow sits on the edge of the bed and opens her beer. "You're like a hermit."

"Not really," Buffy sits on the table, her feet resting on the only chair in the room. "I spend most of my time in town." Buffy pours three tablets onto her hand and tosses them in her mouth, swallowing them with a healthy gulp of beer.

"No one recognized the picture of you." Willow says, pulling it out of her pocket, pretending to ignore Buffy taking whatever shes taking.

Buffy doesn't have to get up, only lean forward to take it from her. "Why this one?"

"Ken's lead said a brunette was down here. The only time I've seen you brunette was Halloween."

"Well, same color, different look." Buffy tosses the picture back, taking a long sip and effectively finishing her drink.. "You've walked past me twice this week."

"What?" Willow asks surprised. She looks Buffy over slowly, the long blond locks are long gone. Buffy's hair is dark brown and spiky, slightly longer than Spike used to wear his hair. She's wearing very little, if any, make up. Her muscles are more defined and she has very little color on. All her clothes are dark and dirty. Not the Buffy Willow remembers. "When?"

"Tuesday night, I was sitting at the bar sipping a beer, you asked the bartender about me." Willow's hand covers her mouth and Buffy can't help but be amused. "Then tonight as you were leaving town, you brushed past me in more of a hurry than I was."

"That's how you knew where I was?" Willow asks, finally remembering Buffy had saved her life again. "Following me?"

"No, I let you go. I just happened to be heading home when I saw you get bit." Buffy sets the empty down. "I wasn't going to tell you you'd finally found me, but I couldn't let you die either."

"Well... thanks, I guess." Willow grows visibly uncomfortable with this new Buffy. "So, you had some things to explain..."

"You know what DID is?" Buffy asks, climbing off the table and getting a second beer. She pulls the chair in front of Willow and straddles it.

Willow thinks for a moment, "Split personalities?"

"Very good." Buffy figured she'd know, Willow had always been the brightest of them.

"No," Willow shakes her head. "You don't have alters Buffy, I'd know. I spent all my time with you for how many years?"

"We spent all our time together but doing separate things Wil. Those last few years... our friendship suffered. We really didn't know each other as anything but allies." Buffy reminds.

"So you're telling me I just missed my best friend's mental breakdown?" Willow's head shakes more violently from side to side. "No... no way."

"I just wanted to make sure you knew the concept. What's going on with me is only similar." Buffy takes another drink and watches as Willow sits back, collecting her thoughts. "You know there's the Buffy side and the Slayer side right? Think of that as two alters."

Willow sets her bottle down as she tries to follow what Buffy is saying. "Okay..."

"Now, the slayer usually dominates. Look at Kendra, all about the slay. Even Faith was all about the kill, anything else was just a game to her. But me, I had a life, family, friends, love..." Buffy pauses to take a sip and Willow nods, following this line of thinking easily. "...that all made the Buffy side stronger which conflicted with the Slayer." Buffy pauses again and finishes her drink, setting the empty on the table. "For a while it wasn't a problem but as the years went on, the strain became too much. As Buffy spiraled down into a depression the slayer began to dominate more, influencing her choices. And as life got harder that's how she wanted it, she didn't want to be Buffy anymore."

"So I'm supposed to believe I'm not talking to Buffy?" Willow raises an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

"I know and feel everything she does, she just feels it more. I don't have a need for emotions so I can choose to ignore them. It's like two sides of a coin." Willow quietly nods as Buffy continues. "I go by Joan if you're wondering."

"And all this has to do with why you left?" Willow tries to steer the conversation away from this alter talk for a while. It was all making Buffy/Joan out a little too crazy.

"Buffy gave up, she didn't care anymore. She let the slayer take control because she felt that was the only way to feel any lasting peace." Joan says, standing up and lighting a cigarette.

"So," Willow snaps her fingers and Joan tosses the pack to her. Willow methodically lights her cigarette, slowly inhaling and standing up. Scratching the side of her head she looks to Joan. "You're Joan... the vampire slayer. You don't give a lick for Buffy and her emotional baggage. You're all about the slay and thats enough. That about the jist?"

Joan sits back down, relaxing as she nods. "Basically, yeah."

"Alright," Willow opens the door and walks out, waving behind her as she says, "Thanks for the smoke."

Joan sits there watching Willow walk into the trees, surprised to see it was morning already. The door finally closes on its own and she puffs on her cigarette. "What just happened?" Knowing no one was there to answer she shrugs it off. "If she wants to leave, she can leave. I didn't want her here anyway."

Willow pauses on top of the hill, looking down at the small cabin and waits. A few minutes later she watches Buffy/Joan comes outside. Willow's smile dies as she watches her walk around to the side of the house, entering what appears to be an outdoor shower. Willow shakes her head, disappointed the slayer didn't care enough to stop Willow. Sighing, Willow realizes at least now she knows for sure. Turning, she enters the woods, finding the hike back to town easier with the rising sun.

After washing up and resting throughout the morning, Willow makes a few calls and books a seat on a bus three days later, the earliest she could due to an airline strike. Willow spends that time keeping to herself mostly. She does some shopping, buying souvenirs for everyone back home. She decides to tell them the lead was a bust and that she just had a little vacation. She's not sure what the hell to tell them about what she's learned so for now she's keeping it to herself.

Joan sticks with her normal routine and soon spots Willow far easier than Willow could spot her. She can tell Willow is looking for her but from the body language Joan figures it's to avoid, not engage. That was fine with her, the redhead sticks out like a sore thumb and Joan finds it easy to duck out of the way anytime their paths might cross.

The next night Willow strikes up a casual conversation with a couple girls vacationing from Atlanta and they invite her out for the night. Willow feels a desperate need to find the fun and wastes no time agreeing. To Willow's surprise, the girls pick her up in a car and take her to the nearest city. There they go to a loud, very crowded night club. Willow isn't used to Latin music but finds it inviting. The whole place has a very seductive atmosphere which immediately begins to relax Willow. After a round of tequila shots all three girls lose themselves in the crowd of dancers.

Joan had followed Willow home the first time she spotted her. She figured she needed to know exactly where Willow was staying so she could avoid the area. Somehow though she winds up in that neighborhood more often than not. As a sure fire way to avoid the fiery redhead, Joan brings her Harley out of the shed and takes off. When she arrives at that same night club only an hour after Willow, she goes in with a nod to the bouncer. Joan saved him a few months back and has been getting free drinks here since.

Joan orders a shot with a beer and makes her way to the back of the club, sitting down at a booth with some people she's friendly with. She has trouble following their conversation, as usual. She isn't very good picking up second languages and consequently doesn't know much Spanish. When her friends get drunk Joan has an especially hard time following the slurs. She just sips her beer and people watches. Being alone in a crowd is something she's good at. Shortly after her second round her friends all leave for the dance floor. Joan's not against dancing, but she doesn't feel up to it tonight. Instead she tips back her drink, watching the others have fun. It takes all of two minutes for two of her friends to matriculate near a pale redhead.

Willow hasn't had this much fun in forever. She can't remember how many shots she's had and she doesn't seem to care as she tosses back another. Jen and Angie follow suit and soon both girls pull Willow out onto the dance floor again. They sandwich Willow between them as their bodies move to the Latin beats. Joan's eye stumbles upon them as Jen rolls her hips slowly down Willow's body as she drops to the floor. Willow, for her part looking really drunk, leans back against Angie who is grinding on Wil from behind, hands wandering and barely missing Willow's danger zones. Joan doesn't even realize the low growl coming out of her parted mouth as her eyes narrow.

Willow closes her eyes and is suddenly dizzy. She rests back on Angie to help stay on her feet. Jen stands up and slips between Willow and Angie, kissing the latter. Willow spins around in a drunken circle still thinking they're dancing when she feels arms reach out and pull her . Next she feels a warm body pressing against her and urgent lips attacking hers. With her eyes half closed, Willow instinctively kisses back, holding onto the aggressor so she doesn't fall on her ass.

Joan's out of her seat, hopping over the railing and at Willow's side in less than five seconds. She grips the other girls shoulder tightly, pushing her away as she catches Willow's limp body with her other arm. Willow's arms reach up and grab Joan, needing to steady herself as she regains her footing. "What the..."

Joan glares at the woman who kissed Willow. "Take a walk."

The woman smirks, wiping her mouth. Looking from Willow to Joan, she figures the drunk wasn't worth the beating and backs away slowly. Angie and Jen come over to help Willow but Joan glares at them too. "I've got it. Goodnight."

Angie steps in front of Joan, stopping her from moving off the dance floor. "Who are you?"

"A friend." Joan says, narrowing her gaze. "I've known her a lot longer than you."

Jen shakes her head, "We don't know that. She came with us and we can't just let some stranger take off with her..."

Willow shakes her head, rubbing her eyes. "It's okay," she groans out. "I know her."

Joan looks at Willow, surprised she hadn't puked yet with all the jarring movements. She raises an eyebrow, staring the girls down. They shrug their shoulders, "Alright, if she says so."

The fresh air does Willow some good. Joan props her up against the building as she retrieves her bike. Willow takes a few deep breaths and her head clears, allowing her to recall the past few minutes. When Joan comes back she holds out the helmet for Willow. "Get on."

"No thanks," Willow shakes her head. "I'll catch a cab."

"This isn't New York Wil, it's kinda hard to catch a ride." Joan gets off the bike and approaches Willow. Brushing Wil's hair behind her ear, Joan takes a good look at Willow's face. "You look better. Feeling okay?"

Willow jerks her head away from Joan's touch. "I'm fine. I was fine inside, I didn't need rescuing."

"That woman was..."

Willow interrupts, "...kissing me. Yeah, I know. We flirted a little earlier, guess she saw an opening. So what?"

"You wanted to kiss her?" Joan asks, almost sounding disgusted.

"Would it matter if I did?" Willow asks.

Joan throws up her arms , climbing back on the bike. "Fine, go party. I don't know why I bothered."

"Me neither," Willow spits out. "You don't care. Why are you here anyway? Following me again? Like you weren't the last time you stumbled upon me?"

"I didn't follow you!" Joan defends herself, wondering if that's really true. "I come here all the time." Joan chooses her words carefully, trying to keep her temper in check. "Why haven't you left town yet?"

Willow pushes herself off the wall, lighting a cigarette. "I leave tomorrow morning, first ticket out of town I could get. On a bus no less!" Willow waves her cigarette in the air. "Hope I didn't inconvenience you with my extended stay, I did avoid you as best as I could."

"You're leaving tomorrow?" Joan questions quietly.

"That's what I said." Willow can't place the emotion behind the question so she keeps it simple. "And I'm not telling anyone I found you so your secret life is safe. Although Dawn will kill me if this ever comes out..." Willow moves to the curb and whistles. To Joan's astonishment a cab pulls up. Willow steps on her cigarette, opening the back door. "Goodbye Joan." The last thing Joan sees Willow do is lean forward as the driver pulls away. Joan slams her helmet onto her head. Spinning the back tire in frustration she speeds off towards home.

Joan parks her bike next to the cabin and immediately walks into the woods, back towards town. Picking up speed quickly, she's soon at an all out run She reaches the cemetery inside of five minutes and starts patrolling. She has so much energy flowing through her she just has to find a way to get it out. Unfortunately for her, she's cleaned up the town pretty well. Lately there was only the rare vamp or demon passing through, like the one who attacked Willow. Normally Joan would have moved on by now but this time she had stuck around.

The witch is the reason she's still here if she's honest with herself. Willow had mentioned coming here and how beautiful it was even with the demons. Joan had taken it upon herself to clean the town up. Once that was done, she's basically been twiddling her thumbs, waiting for something to happen. That's when Willow showed up. And now that she had Joan was going to let her walk away. She stops, closes her eyes and taking a deep breath as she triest to calm herself. When she opens her eyes it's Willow's hotel in front of her. Joan doesn't remember leaving the cemetery or the walk through town but that doesn't matter. She knows what she has to do. Casually walking inside, Joan makes her way up the stairs and down the hall towards Willow's room.

Willow steps out of the shower, slipping on her robe. Toweling off her hair, she walks over to the bed when there's a soft knock on her door. She walks over and cracks it slightly. She can't hide the surprised look as she opens the door wider for Joan. Neither girl says anything. Joan just steps past Willow, entering the room. Willow closes the door and finishes drying her hair. She tosses the towel on a chair and turns to Joan. "Well?"

Joan stares at Willow. Her red hair stuck to her head, still dripping slightly over her shoulders and chest, the drops disappearing beneath the robe. She locks eyes with Willow and takes a slow step closer, pausing briefly before a second step. A couple more steps and Joan's standing in front of Willow. Her hand tentatively reaches up, slim fingers tangling in wet hair as she brushes it behind Willow's ear. This time Willow doesn't pull away. Rather, Willow's breath catches in her throat. This isn't exactly the kind of answer she was expecting. Joan's lips part as Willow licks her own. Before either girl is fully aware of it they are kissing. Soft lips suck Willow's bottom lip before both girls grasp the other desperately, tongues slipping past lips to probe deeper.

Neither girl is prepared for the passion they feel in that embrace. Joan grips the back of Willow's head, walking her backwards until both girls fall onto the bed. Joan's hand wastes no time slipping beneath the robe, which is quickly opened. Willow's back and hips arch against Joan as her lips brush the slayers ear with a moan, "Buffy."

"Joan," the slayer growls, grinding her leather clad body hard against Willow's moist naked flesh. Willow's whimper is followed by a nod as her hands slide down Joan's body to her hips, quickly finding the buckle to her pants and working them loose. Joan's hands rip off her t-shirt and she sheds her clothes as Willow wiggles out of the robe, both girls feverishly groping each other as they undress.

When nothing separates the two girls it's Willow on top, an amused Joan looking up at her. Willow pins the slayers hands above her head and grinds slowly against Joan's slick pussy, grinning when Joan bites her lip and her eyes flare. Willow dips her head, playfully taking the slayer's nipple in her mouth. Joan's back arches, pushing her breast into Willow's mouth. Wil teases the nipple between her teeth, tugging gently before biting harder. Joan cries out, her hips pressing hard against Willow's leg. She tries to free her arms and is surprised when Willow has no problem keeping her pinned. Willow looks up at the slayer, her eyes flashing black for the briefest moment. "Not tonight slayer..."

Joan growls, locking her legs around Willow's, trapping the redhead. Using her hips, she rides Willow's thigh, bringing herself closer but at a slow pace. This positions her own thigh between Willow's and the witch groans, pushing against Joan to create more pressure. Her grip loosens ever so slightly and Joan takes advantage. Before she can react, Joan is out of Willow's grasp and after a slight tangling of limbs pinning the redhead in turn. She winks and places painfully slow kisses down Willow's stomach, not even trying to keep her pinned down. Joan watches Willow's skin quiver with each soft brush of her lips. Willow's hands grips the sheets instead of Joan, content to let the slayer have her way for now. Joan's lips barely brush over Willow's wet center when the redhead arches up, her body begging for more. Joan's tongue painfully licks over Willow's pussy at a snails pace. Willow's hand flies to Joan's head, gripping her hair tight as Joan teases Willow mercilessly. With more than a little pressure from Willow, Joan stops teasing and gives Willow exactly what she craves.

Willow pushes against Joan's mouth as hard as possible, trying for something just out of reach. Joan brings her closer and closer but she still can't release. Frustrated that she's still being teased, Willow sits up and pushes Joan away. The slayer, already at the edge of the bed, hits the floor. Willow crawls to the end of the bed and peeks over at a very confused slayer, flat on her ass. Willow snakes herself over Joan's body, kissing along Joan's body until she straddling the slayer's mouth. Willow lowers her dripping pussy over Joan's mouth and fucks her face slowly. Joan slips two fingers into Willow, twisting them to reach her g spot as she nibbles on Willow's clit.

"Mmm God," Willow moans, falling forward on top of Joan. Parting her lower lips with a finger, Willow's tongue lightly teases Joan's inflamed clit. Willow smirks when Joan's hips buck up, feeling only cool air. Joan whines into Willow's pussy which only makes Willow ride her face harder. Slipping three fingers quickly into Joan, Willow's mouth locks down on her clit, sucking hard. Both girls work off each other, only able to last a few more minutes before Willow's orgasm washes over her. Joan hears Willow crying out her name and comes with her. Willow slips off Joan, laying on the floor besides her. Both girls catch their breath, laying still until they feel strong enough to move. They barely make it back to the bed before collapsing into the best nights sleep either have had in years.

Buffy wakes up the next morning with a smile, something she can't remember doing in over a decade. She stretches out, her body snaking around the bed before she sits up. Looking around, her eyebrows arch. "Where the hell am I?"