Chapter 5

"One more."

"You don't understand. I'm going to pass out." I'm starving. Starving. And when I'm this hungry, I get grumpy.

"You're fine. One more and then we'll eat." I'd kill him if I had the strength.

"I'm not gonna make it," I say in a weak voice while falling against the window and resting my head on the glass. "I don't even have the energy to hold up my head."

He looks at me and rolls his eyes. "You drive one more car before dinner and I'll buy."

I sit up straight and put on a smile. "Ok."

He looks back at the road and chuckles. "Why am I not surprised that worked?" he mumbles.

I pick up the brochures. "Where are we going next, o' spender of my money?"

"Nissan."

"An Altima?" I ask as I pull out that brochure and look at the first page.

"Maxima."

"But the Altima's in my price range."

"So is the Maxima."

"You clearly don't know what my price range is," I mumble.

"You have to have saved up some money; you haven't had a car payment in what, ten years?"

I look over at him. "For your information, I've never had a car payment."

He groans. "Of course this was already a piece of crap when you bought it. I should've guessed."

"No, I bought if from my grandmother for ten dollars when it was two years old and had eleven thousand miles on it, thank you very much."

"Ten dollars?" he screeches.

"And a promise to have dinner with her at least once a week as long as I lived in ?xml:namespace prefix st1 ns "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" / Madison."

"Ten dollars and you had to buy her dinner once a week? That's it?"

"I didn't buy dinner," I mumble in embarrassment. No wonder I've never told this story.

"She did?" he screeches even higher.

"Or she cooked," I counter.

"You ripped off your poor elderly grandmother?" he asks me in disgust.

I hit him on the shoulder. "No. It was her idea."

"To give you a practically brand new albeit huge car for ten dollars?" he asks doubtfully.

"Because I was sixteen and going through that age where I only wanted to be with my friends, and…"

He cuts me off. "And Freddie, don't forget" he says in much the same way he says FreeRide's name.

I give him an evil glare. Never again will he get the name of anyone I've slept with. "Freddie came after the car. In fact," I say flippantly, "Freddie came in the car."

"Donna!" he shouts, looking towards the back seat in horror.

I smile triumphantly. "You brought him up. Anyway…" I say pointedly, "Grandma wanted to stay close to me, so she made me promise to have dinner with her once a week. It was nice."

"So, you're telling me that not only are you driving the seventeen year-old car in which you lost your virginity, but that your grandmother helped make that possible."

"She's very progressive."

"Well, the Freddie-mobile is history," he says, pulling into the Nissan dealership.

We park and walk towards the cars, Josh leading. We go a few rows over until we get to the Maximas, and Josh starts looking through the windows. "This looks nice."

I stand on the other side of it. "I don't like the color," I say stubbornly.

"Again with the color?" he asks as he stands up.

I shrug. "It's gold."

He sighs. "Fine. What about that one?" he asks, pointing to one a few cars down. It's a dark gray.

I sigh. "I guess…" It's a really cool color.

"Good enough," he says, walking over to it. "And it's only twenty-nine, five."

"Only?" I ask with raised eyebrows.

"You've gone fifteen years with no car payment; surely you have a nest egg set aside."

Out of the corner of my eye, I see a shark coming our way. "Here he comes."

"Be nice."

"I'm always nice."

"You told the Lexus salesman he couldn't have your piece of crap."

"I didn't tell him that."

"You pretty much did."

"Well… he wouldn't take care of her."

"Donna, no one's going to take care of her. She's going to the dump."

My mouth drops open. "Take that back!"

"Hi folks," shark says walking up to us. "You're looking at a very popular model there."

I'm still glaring at Josh, but he ignores me and talks to shark. "What kind of financing are you offering?"

He hands Josh a business card which I immediately take from him. "2.9 for up to five years, depending on your credit."

"Her credit's impeccable," he tells shark, as he has every other shark we've met. He's right, but I find myself wondering how he knows.

"I think I'd feel better in an American-made car," I say as I cross my arms over my chest and look across the street at the Chevrolet dealership.

"You haven't looked at a single American-made car all day," Josh reminds me in a low voice.

"You know," shark says. "Most American-made cars aren't all American these days. They use parts from all over the world."

I look over at him. "But they use American manpower."

He smiles wickedly at me. I hate him already. "Nissans are assembled here in the US." Well, fine.

"Can we test drive this one?" Josh asks him.

He nods. "Sure, let me grab the key."

Shark writes down the VIN number and leaves. As soon as he's out of earshot, Josh pounces. "I thought you were going to be nice."

I raise my eyebrows. "I changed my mind."

"You're acting like a child."

"It's like looking in a mirror, isn't it?"

His jaw drops. "I'm not the one holding on to the car in which I lost my virginity. I'm an adult."

"I hate you."

He ignores me and looks up to where shark's walking towards us again. "Here he comes, be nice."

"I don't like the new shark."

"Because he pointed out that you were wrong? I rather enjoyed it myself."

"I hate you."

"So you keep saying."

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

We get into The Beast twenty minutes later. "So?" he asks eagerly, as he has every time we've gotten back in the car.

"I didn't like that one. Can we eat now?"

He chuckles and gets The Beast started on the second try. She must not have heard the dump comment. "Before you waste away to nothing?" he asks, backing out. It's always surprised me, but The Beast does very well in reverse.

"Yes."

"Pizza?"

I start to get excited, but then I remember the diet. "No, something healthy," I say in a resigned voice.

"Donna…" he whines.

He doesn't want healthy food. That actually makes it a bit more appealing. "Come on Josh, it'll be good for you."

"Is this payback for me making you buy a car?"

"No, I haven't decided what your payback for that will be. But I assure you, it'll be worse than a healthy meal."

"You're an evil woman."

I wiggle my eyebrows at him. "Yes, I know."

He sighs heavily. "Fine, we can do healthy, but let's keep it quick so we can get back to test-driving."

"No…" I whine. We're pathetic whining losers.

"Yes, two more."

"Josh…" more whining.

He studies me for a minute. "We get pizza and I'll only make you test one more tonight."

This is intriguing. "We get pizza and I don't have to test anymore."

"Anymore tonight."

"Anymore this month."

"It's the second, Donna."

I smile big. "I know."

He looks like he might be pondering this, but then The Beast stalls. Stupid Beast. "No deal," he says, starting it again.