The Inspector and the Secretary
Note: Taken from the aftermath of the Pink Panther (2006) we find that Chief Inspector Dreyfus is still alive despite what he endured (But that leaves me asking..."Why ? He had all of that payback coming after treating Clouseau so badly !") . Although this does not bode well for Jaques he is enjoying every minute on the force with his partner, Ponton ("bridge"). Nicole, his secretary, is still very much in love with him and they decide to get married. He learns two lessons. Number 1, age doesn't matter in love. Number 2, he didn't need those "miracle pills for the middle-aged man". Despite being on new cases almost constantly, he is able to take care of his fratneral twins, Charlotte and Claude.
"It's evening, Nicole. You don't need your glasses. You look beautiful."--Jaques to Nicole, who without her glasses mistakenly walks off straight into a tree
"I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. 'Ti s the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will persue their principles unto death."--Leonardo da Vinci
"Dealing with a woman is like handling an artichoke. It takes some time before you get to her heart."--Jaques Clouseau
Chapter 1—For Duty, For Love and For Fwance !
Inspector Clouseau was back on the case working for the French police force once again.
Unfortunately, chief Inspector Dreyfus was back as well, trying to make Jaques' life miserable.
But Dreyfus couldn't deflate Jaques, no matter how hard he tried, even despite of being held back by restraints and casts. Jaques was giddily in love with the office secretary, Nicole, who was a brilliant, beautiful and unlike any woman he had met in the past. He wanted to propose to her and live the rest of his natural existence with her by his side but working on case after case had kept him occupied. France came first, duty second, and love came third. Love was never far from his mind, though. His biggest problem was finding the right words to say to Nicole without digressing from his true intention, but this proved to be quite a challenge for him. He often found proposing to Nicole often ended in very awkward Freudian slips. However, his indefatigable nature wouldn't allow him to quit without a fair fight. It was evident that Nicole was the woman he wished to marry. Because without her, he was like a puzzle with a piece missing: incomplete.
It had been a slow month for the police force and the cadets that had been recently inducted had been taking upon local cases within different provinces and Jaques was stuck in the office collating and filing dossiers. It was such a lovely spring day that he longed to be outside and share a romantic picnic with Nicole. He had everything planned in his mind's eye, but gathering the courage to set his plans into motion had proved to be a high hurtle that he had trouble jumping. But, his spirit would never let him down. At once when he was on lunch break, he asked Nicole if she wanted to enjoy a picnic with him. He happened to blurt it out in a rather loud voice, but she was all too happy to accept. He prayed that he would have the fortitude and bravery to ask for her hand in holy matrimony, but even if he didn't, Nicole was a brilliant woman.
During their lunch, Jaques took Nicole's hand and her cheeks became florid.
"Nicole, there is something I have been itching you ask you.", Jaques said, trying to find the engagement ring in his back pocket.
"Itching ? Oh, it must be dry skin. I have some lotion that would clear that right up.", Nicole said, fishing around in her purse for goat's milk lotion.
"That wasn't quite what I meant...What I meant to say was, will you lend me your hand in holy matrimooney ?", Jaques said, displaying the solitaire cut diamond to her.
"Jaques you know I have been waiting for such a long time to hear you ask me this.", she answered, her hand across her heart.
"And ?", Jaques said, raising an eyebrow playfully.
"The answer is, of course, my dear ! Yes ! I want to marry you !", Nicole said, throwing her arms around him. Momentarily, the ring was lost in the grass but fortunately Jaques had been able to retrieve it. He placed it upon Nicole's hand and they had their first kiss as an engaged couple. And somewhere, that big brass globe was still rolling along and more than likely would happen to stop in on their reception, letting Clouseau be reminded that inertia is quite a force to be reckoned with.
Chapter 2—Wedding, Reception, and the Globe Desists
It was a gorgeous day for a wedding and the weather had decided to hold out. It was April and the temperatures were agreeable for all kinds of engagements outdoors. The couple to be had made an excellent date to tie the knot and they would be professing their love to millions of people worldwide. After all the good deeds Clouseau had done he had become quite popular around Europe. Pretty soon, the ceremony had begun and the vicar had begun reciting the archetypal scriptures from I Corinthians. Before long the two had stated their own poetic vows and kissed passionately while the congregation applauded and cheered. There were few dry eyes in the audience. All of them were pleased for Jaques and Nicole.
Everything was going sensationally until the reception. From the pink panther diamond escapade so many months ago, the brass globe that he had knocked down had decided to make a stop at it's final resting place, the reception hall. It had left quite a path of chaos in its wake, but luckily it hadn't harmed any more innocent people. It could be put back in its original dwelling place which was oddly enough back at the academy. Once that was put into motion, the ball would be nowhere near Clouseau should he set the globe on a roll again. Albiet there had been some peculiar moments, the wedding feast had been a magnificent occasion that the newlyweds and their guests would be remembering for years to come.
Chapter 3—Respite For the Weary
It was already starting off to be a glorious honeymoon for the two lovebirds, Nicole and Jaques. While they were gone in the Caymans, Ponton took over for his friend for so long as Jaques would be out of the office back at the academy. Although Jaques was homesick, he was elated to be by Nicole's side and enjoying the resplendid qualities the Cayman Islands had to offer. They had been going everywhere and had grown tired and wished to sleep for the night.
After coming to the conclusion that he had left his "miracle pills for the middle-aged man" at home, Jaques first became concerened but Nicole told him he really didn't need them after all. After making love passionately, they fell asleep, exhausted underneath the covers. For a moment, he looked at Nicole's face illuminated in the moonlight. He kissed her forehead and smiled brightly. He indeed was the luckiest man alive to have married the most beautiful and brilliant woman in France.
Nicole was an energetic woman and with renewed strength and joye de vive, Jaques had no trouble keeping up with her. Albiet that they had to leave the Cayman Islands in the next few days, they had plenty of pleasant memories together. They had taken many photos of their adventures there and brought back plenty of souveniers so their trip wouldn't soon be forgotten but life was about to become a lot more interesting for Jaques because he was going to become a father in 9 month's time. If they were going to be anything like him, they would be continuing the Clouseau legacy. But being a father would prove to be trying at times, but it would be the most rewarding thing he had ever done in his entire life.
Epilogue
Charlotte and Claude were soon brought into the world, already with inquisitive and observant minds. There wasn't anyplace they wouldn't crawl so Jaques and Nicole had to be at the ready to make certain they weren't crawling into a perilous situation. There was nothing that frightened these two infants. They were brought to work now and then, but when mom and dad were busy at the academy they were left with a loving nurse named Bernadette who was Nicole's nanny growing up. She had become the childrens' godmother and she couldn't have been more pleased at this title that she made sure the infants were well tended.
As the infants became children they were put into an excellerated school at a young age. They were still a little awkward with words but they more than made up for slips of the tongue through stellar grades and an adept nature with puzzles they had continued to dazzle their teachers and be the envy of many students. But, they were never teased. Inheriting their father's quick, smooth penchant for karate they were never bothered for long. Wherever the future led them, they were most assuredly police material. But of course, only time would tell for certain.
The End
February 20, 2006