A/N: This is a joke story, people. Please read lookup before reviewing. Yes, I know it makes no sense. It's not supposed to. n.n- EJ
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The camera was
always with Mark. It was just unavoidable. It was always there.
Kind of eerie, having a camera staring at you all the time, but
Mark seemed to enjoy it. And so begins the story of Mark and his
camera, though it may cause severe brain damage.
In that old store was the shabby camera. Mark fell in love with it right away. Somehow, though Mark doesn't have a penny to his name, Mark bought it. Their love was like a river of loving..love love. Love. So Mark and his camera began to stalk everyone and tape them. It was true, creepy, stalker love.
And everyone who knew Mark feared for his well being. For a few weeks or so, he was following everyone, occasionally jumping out of a bush and yelling "SASAFRAS!" and scaring the living daylights out of them. And his camera was with him. If inanimate objects could laugh, it would be laughing along with him, then running off as they both chuckled insanely.
But one day, Mark fell in love again. Mark fell in love with his scarf. He was seeing the scarf when camera was not around, and camera, being the jealous type, felt very jealous of Scarf. Scarf was a beautiful young scarf, who was beautifully sewn. Their love was slowly growing apart. And Camera spent many long nights thinking of Mark. And, in an impossible inanimate way, Guitar and Camera began to talk.
"Hello," Guitar said, which was actually more like someone strumming a guitar and the keys sounding like 'Hello'. Camera looked over to him. He was his owner's friend's love. Or at least, Camera thought so. Maybe Roger and Guitar were just friends. "Something troubling you?"
Camera nodded. "Poor thing, being abandoned like that," Guitar said. "But Scarf is quite the looker." Camera sighed in an impossible, camera-like manner. Guitar knew this was obviously not helping. "Would you like to go for some...video tapes, or something?"
"Not right now." Camera replied.
"Or we could just keep...talking," Guitar said, propped up against the wall. Camera nodded. And so Mark opened the door, coming in, taking Scarf off of his neck, then stroking her lovingly, putting her down.
"Tough luck, sweets, he's quite the catch. He's mine now," Scarf giggled. Apparently inanimate objects can communicate, even though, in reality this would not happen, but who said this was reality?
"Shut up, Scarf." Guitar said. "Can't you see she's not feeling well?"
"You don't need to stick up for me." Camera said.
"But I want to." Replied Guitar.
"Oh, Guitar, you sweetheart!" Camera smiled.
Roger walked in just as they were finishing up this conversation, and screamed as they had, quite randomly, grown mouths to allow them to talk. He stared, then dashed over to Mark to tell him. Scarf giggled in a drunken manner.
Guitar and Camera fell in love, but after winter, Mark abandoned Scarf, and he was alone again. Feeling empty inside, Mark picked up Camera again.
And after Roger was out of therapy - even though he probably can't afford that - he and Guitar rekindled their relationship. And there was also something going on between Collins and Hat, Angel and Drums, Mimi and Dollar Bill...but that all is a different story.