Gone Missing: Not Writing
By: LoveSethJames left Harry alone for the rest of the night. Against his will. Only leaving Harry be because Lily insisted on giving him some time alone.
"There must be a reason. He loves Seth. He would write to him, or at least write back when Seth wrote him," Lily was thinking out loud when her and James were getting ready for bed.
"Exactly my point! There has to be something wrong! That's why I should go talk to him," James said.
"James. Harry isn't one to come to us when we push him. When you push him to talk to you he wants to less and less. Maybe we should put him on that medicine. That anti-depressant," Lily said with a sad tone in her voice.
James shook his head, "No. He isn't going on some med for crazy people!"
"It's not for crazy people, James. He needs it I think. If it could help him then you should want him to try it. It won't hurt," Lily said, running her hands through her hair before putting it back in a pony tail.
"It's going to be lonely here without boys and now Mikala," James said, purposely changing the subject so he no longer had to think of the thought of Harry needing something more then what he could give him just to be happy, or even live.
"James, I'm calling the doctor tomorrow. I want him on those pills before he leaves to go back to Hogwarts," Lily said, now lying back on the bed.
James sat down because he had been pacing the room ever since he and Lily had come upstairs. Shutting off the light he sighed heavily, " Will Harry even take them?"
Lily looked over at him in surprise. Like she hadn't even thought about what Harry would think to them deciding he needs to get treatment for something he believes as no big deal.
"Yes, he will." Lily said, shutting off the light.
James couldn't sleep. He tossed and turned for hours. Thinking and rethinking everything to do with Harry. Trying to come up with different solutions on how to get him to feel better and enjoy life more. But every time he thought something up it was quickly demolished when he thought of how much that was to ask of a teenager who has been tormented beyond belief and seen a classmate of his die.
Getting up slowly so not to wake Lily, James tip-toed out of the room, leaving the door a crack open. Relaxing a little since he safely exited the room James headed towards Harry's. It was past 1 in the morning so James assumed Harry would be in a deep sleep.
His assumption was correct as he opened Harry's door to see the lump on the bed in a completely dark room.
James left the door open so he could see Harry from the light in the hall. When James reached the bed Harry rolled over, taking a deep sigh as his body relaxed in the slumber he was in.
"I don't know what I am going to do with you, kid," James said after standing there for a few minutes watching Harry's chest rise and fall. He pulled Harry's blanket up to his chest and lightly let his fingers go across Harry's forehead, brushing his bangs.
He turned and left after that. Knowing that Harry was sleeping and not having any kind of dream maybe he could fall asleep.
The next afternoon as Harry laid on his bed reading Beyond Quidditch Lily came down with a small bottle. Harry looked up as she came in with a big smile on her face.
"Hi, Harry. What are you doing," she asked, coming over and sitting on his bed.
Harry didn't say a word but showed her the book with an expression on his face that clearly stated he was thinking, "Can't you see the book?"
"Right of you to be smart with me," Lily said, putting her hand on Harry's arm, "Harry your father and I think it best if you take these pills. I talked to your doctor and we agree it's the best thing for you. All you need to do is take one of these at night and in 7 days you will take two at night and after that 1 in the morning and two at night. You have to gradually get your body used to it,"Lily said, showing Harry the bottle in her hand.
Harry didn't quite understand all that Lily just said. All her heard was the part about taking some pills. Knowing he had no control he acted like he didn't care whatsoever and simply shrugged and looked back to his book.
"You're okay with this?" Lily asked.
"I don't really care, Mum. It isn't a big deal," Harry said without even looking at her.
Lily waited a second, watching Harry try to read with her looking at him. She leaned forward and hugged him, kissing the side of his head.
"I love you, you know," Lily said.
"I know Mum," Harry said.
Saturday morning Harry got a letter from Ron. Asking when he'd be coming back to Hogwarts. Harry smiled as he wrote back stating that the next day he'd be coming.
"Hey,"
Harry turned after letting Hedwig off with his letter. Sirius had made himself comfortable in Harry's room.
"What are you doing here?" Harry asked, smiling as he sat down opposite of Sirius.
"Just wanted to see how you were doing. Check up on you I suppose. You got everyone worried, I suppose I had to see for myself," Sirius said, taking a piece of chocolate off Harry's desk and stuffing it into his mouth.
"Why's everyone worried about me?" Harry asked, his smile vanishing.
Sirius's leaned forward and looked into Harry's eyes, "You know your parents, specially your father, want to know why you haven't been writin' back to Seth,"
Harry stood up and flung his arms up, " SO? What's the big deal? I don't need to write little letters to my kid brother every day!"
"The point is," Sirius said calmly, "You used to write letters to him. But then you stopped- abruptly,"
"I haven't written to him ever. Not since before he went to Hogwarts! Like two years ago! I was a different person back then," Harry stated.
"Okay. Fine. You haven't written to him. But what I am trying to get across is that you and Seth used to be close but now it seems you are trying to avoid him. Even though you know not writing to him kills him since he looks up to you so much. It's like if you wrote me letters, you'd want me to respond, right?" Sirius asked.
"That's completely wrong. I don't feel like writing to him, to anybody for that matter," Harry said, going over and falling onto his bed.
"Didn't I just see you send off a letter with Hedwig? Obviously somebody gets to hear from you," Sirius said.
Harry didn't know what to say. Sirius was smart and was cornering him.
"Why don't you just leave me alone?" Harry asked, a bit ruder then he normally would have but he was so disturbed he couldn't help himself.
"I can leave you alone, but know that if you don't tell me what is really on your mind your dad will be in here later. I don't think you can go back to Hogwarts till they know you are okay,"
"What's me not writing to him have anything to do with me being okay enough to go to Hogwarts?" Harry yelled in outrage, panicking since he was looking forward to going back to Hogwarts.
"It has everything to do with it and you know it. Something is bothering you and I want you to be able to tell me. Hell, if you can't tell me tell one of your parents. Somebody! It's gunna tear you up if you don't and James isn't going to let you go to Hogwarts tomorrow unless you tell us on your own, meaning he's not going to use any magic to get it out of you," Sirius said.
"Fine. I don't care if I don't ever go back then." Harry said stubbornly, knowing he was telling a downright lie and he'd find some way to get back to that school.
Sirius sighed loudly and seemed to give up on the matter. Leaving Harry in silence. Harry knew perfectly well he was going to report to James.
Crossing his arms Harry laid on his back on his bed, trying to figure out what he was going to do.