I recommend you to read while getting out of re-zero logic where dying for a random girl totally makes sense and life is just a dirt. Sorry to put it that way but that's how it is. Just saying this for the sake of your enjoyment.
Let's start.
"Let me help you find whatever is stolen from you!"
He stated once again. Breaking the silence once again. Surprising the elf once again. Unnerving the spirit once again.
Being unpredictable. Making choices and using your abilities. That was the only choice for him.
"B-but just what happened? Why do you say that out of nowhere?" The elf was surprised, unable to hide the shock on her face. She kept muttering the same word she did when things got too much for her: Why?
Subaru first thought she was questioning something but no, she was just out of her comfort zone. She would ask why but she would not search for answers.
Just like her 'daddy'. He might be strong and know more than his 'daughter' but that did not change the fact he was lacking.
"What happened doesn't stop me from giving a helping hand. Regardless of what happened, he is fine with this too." Subaru stated while looking at the spirit.
"Me…?" Puck was about to recover from his long-remained shock, only to be hit by something again.
Puck had no idea what was happening right now. What this guy was saying was lost to him.
Once again. Puck's inability to keep his composure confirmed a few things for Subaru.
'One thing I was asking myself why did he threaten me that way? Saying that I wouldn't survive anyway. Then it dawned on me, he wanted to use me. For what? Well. If he had a similar lack of common sense and if he had no powers to track the thief down. Both his need for me and that poorly structured threat made sense. I saw her, the thief and for some reason, he wants more than information, he wants me to accompany them.' Subaru summarized.
He wasn't a genius capable of forming super-long thoughts in a matter of seconds. The reason he reached so many conclusions was that the elf and 'Puck' had taken so much time saying and doing nothing. Whether it be coming out of shock or deciding something they took their sweet time as if there were no consequences for it. That gives Subaru time to think.
They did not possess the ability to gather their composure quickly or decide things fast. Subaru, however, came from Japan. The strict education system and a place where social awkwardness was punished and he could not afford to say anything too careless. They, however, lacked so much at pretty much anything socially related that the gap between Subaru and these two was socially similar to the gap between their power levels: wide as heaven and earth. Even Puck's threat was poorly structured. He had a chance here and he would not miss that.
'Making my choices and using my abilities. I don't have any special abilities or supernatural abilities. However, they lack average things a normal human needs. Spirit was too powerful, he did not require to communicate with anyone. He got what he wanted when he wanted. That much was obvious and he pretty much screamed that fact at me. Elf, however, I am not sure, she acts like she never talked to anyone in her life but this rat. Regardless, her input or how much I talk to her is irrelevant. She has no control, it has to be Puck. I gotta do this with Puck.' Subaru made his decisions. If he understood Puck to a level then this might just work.
"Puck…" Elf girl muttered. Subaru had to be quick.
"You need me. I saw the girl, I don't know who she is, however, I do remember her face. I also think I can help in other ways. I will do my best. I think this is your best shot." Subaru said all he had to say. He could already see gears starting to turn on Puck's head. He was curious about what kind of conclusion a powerful and arrogant being would reach. He had allowed his 'daughter' to get the wrong idea after all. Holding the truth off of her for his own sake and manipulating her decision.
Subaru made sure he got one thing carved into his mind: Puck is not a human.
He does not have morals. He is powerful. He lacks common sense. He does not have the dignity of a human making him uncaring towards having control over himself. Just like an animal, but calling him such is an insult to those beings that worked honestly for their survival.
And while Puck might hate him. He could not produce hate coming from a human from Earth.
One thing no parallel world cannot match his planet was hate. So humans here hate other races? That's cute because we hate ourselves more than they hate anything.
"But you are…" Elf looked at him with a confused gaze.
It irritated Subaru. While all of this was going on this girl actually stayed on the fact of him being a thug. He could see on her face, she didn't even consider she might be wrong.
"Just because I evaded my eyes doesn't mean I am a bad person. This is a ridiculous assumption. I evaded my eyes because you got too close to me and I felt threatened. It's your fault. And how stupid you can be? Thinking that I got beaten so I must be a bad guy? Don't you ever see injustice or prejudice in your life? Not even crime? Must be nice, never being hated I mean." Even Subaru thought that not saying all that would be better. But with this elf, what he said hardly mattered anyway. She did not work with logic so no matter what he might try to say to prove himself or anything, did not matter. He also avoided the true reason for his evasion.
But his words had an unexpected effect on the girl.
'I got proven wrong for some reason. My words somewhat gave power to that meek girl. Was I wrong? But it's not like I just said all those things for nothing. It was my honest deduction. Puck didn't care about my comment either. I took everything about Puck, every expression on his face and where he looked. He was the threat here.'
"Why do you want to help? I don't understand." Elf asked me with a more normal face. I wanted Puck to ask me that. But you can't have everything.
"This is the best thing to do for me. I have nothing to do and my situation is difficult."
"What do you mean?" Her face softens for some reason. Perhaps she was that naive. It really didn't matter. Since Puck was here. Manipulating her was an option no matter how scummy that was, she caused so many problems for me not to mention suffering. Her lack of common sense used by her father and I got threatened and induced with some kind of artificial fear. But in the end, manipulating her was meaningless. Puck made the decisions here, that's why I cannot understand why she asks the questions and he can afford to keep silent. It was creepy how she kept asking questions I expected from Puck.
How can Puck be in control of her without talking? It was beyond me.
"I will not tell you about my situation. That's my problem. But I can tell you that I will not harm you or steal anything from you."
'I will not harm you' might be something they wouldn't even take seriously since it comes from a weakling like me. But I genuinely believe both of them are threats to me. Puck is a threat regardless of what might happen. One of the reasons I go with them is because I can make Puck think about the threat he made earlier to use me by implying I want to come with them. After all, from his point of view, I don't believe I can survive alone. Puck did not possess the brightest mind, if it was any other person they would be suspicious at the very least when things worked too well.
The biggest reason when it comes to Puck however it's because he can't kill me in front of the elf but if I leave at the wrong time he might instantly kill me by chasing me down and then coming back to her side as if nothing has happened. So I need to keep being in front of her for a while. And run away as much as I can when I find the opening so he can't track me down.
The elf was a threat too, how naive or good-natured she was: they are totally irrelevant.
She can't think for herself. She is far more powerful than me. It's not wrong to assume she believes she is far stronger than me physically with how close she got to me without worrying, she is probably right if I can believe the elves having good strength trope works here.
But even so…
In the end, I might actually try to do my best to harm them after all. They did harm me. If it was me from 30 minutes ago, I would not dare to think that I had any chance to harm them but again, me from 30 minutes ago wouldn't believe he would have a chance against three thugs with weapons from a world where the average guy is far stronger than the average earthling, but if not for the elf distracting me all of them would be dead right now.
Dead.
I won't limit myself any longer. Even though I might take their lives I— It doesn't feel that's wrong at all.
'I guess you don't feel bad when it's kill or be killed.'
"Very well. But you will do as you are told." Said the elf girl with a normal voice.
But it sent chills down Subaru's spine. Those words were from Puck. How could she say those words then? His mind could not reach an answer. He did not understand.
'Could it be that she has a personality disorder? That would change everything.'
"I know his name, Puck. But I do not know yours. My name is Subaru Natsuki, time spent between us will be short but I believe knowing each other's name will smooth things out enough for us to have no problem." I gave my name in non-Japanese order. I knew that's how it worked in this world by hearing people talk. Puck somewhat knew my name even though he had to touch me to know more about me… that was another thing I could not explain.
'Also this is the first time I made an introduction like this.' Subaru made his introduction calmly without much enthusiasm. But it actually created some questions.
"Are you… a noble?" The spirit finally talked, questioning him. Ironically Puck speaking wasn't nearly as unnerving as when he stayed silent. The way he talked was noble like huh? Interesting.
"No. Just a thing I picked up in my life while thinking that it might be useful." That was not a lie. He truly worked on it thinking it might be useful.
"I see." And the only normal conversation between them died with Puck saying that. It was weird. Puck's 'dislike' towards him seemingly disappeared out of nowhere. He did NOT understand why. Puck wasn't making his dislike fully shown anymore.
I turned towards the elf girl. She still did not tell her name.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened her eyes there was a more individualistic look in her eyes. Whoever Satella appeared in those eyes more than ever. It felt like she was trying to fix something. It looked like she made up her mind. Subaru did not understand any of that though, he just wanted a name.
The wind made her hair flutter, if they had a better introduction and a first impression Subaru would enjoy that sight, but it was her who made everything problematic so that did not matter. The only thing wind achieved was making Subaru 'tch' from the inside because for some reason he scorned how everything she did from expressions to movements was special. It was as if even nature was supporting the implication that she was more important than Subaru could ever be.
"I am a silver-haired half-elf. My name is Satella. Just Satella" For some reason, Subaru felt like there was some other intention than just an introduction but he can't put his hand on—
Why is that rat making such a face? What is happen—
His heart skipped a beat as his eyes connected with hers. If Subaru could be dishonest with himself then this would be something he would lie to himself. A defeated expression with a hopeless gaze, the way her eyes lost their light how that comical wind was nowhere to be found. How it felt like she was the one who said the words uttered right now and not this spirit. All of that touched him.
Nothing beautiful or majestic. Nothing magical or fantastic. She was down to earth and for some reason, it touched Subaru so badly that he wanted to clutch his chest. The way she looked and the way she appeared right now connected with Subaru and affected him far more than her looks or the way she existed as if he could not reach her.
—-But Natsuki Subaru did not show any of that to the outside.
What he did was smile and mutter what he honestly thought with a soothing voice, just like he did in the past when he was lively. No, perhaps he did not ever talk to a girl like this.
The elf saw his scary eyes with nightmare-like black softened in a way she could not comprehend but it also created a warm feeling she did not understand, she did not expect any of this and yet words came out of his weirdly soft-looking lips hit her chest and caused an unbelievably sweet pain and when his smile grew even more, something was happening to her.
"Satella. Satella. I see a fitting beautiful name. Nice to meet you, Satella. I hope we can get along despite everything."
—What is happening to her… she did not know, but she knew that it increased a thousandfold when he muttered those words.
After he said those words several things happened.
First right after Satella's shock faded her face turned from white to red in an instant and she started to make weird voices as she attempted to say something comprehensible. Eventually, she gave up and turned her back to Subaru while crouching down and holding her hair like a crazy girl.
Subaru first didn't understand what was going on but as Satella's emotions reflected on Puck he understood that those feelings were enormous and for some reason; positive.
When Subaru said those words he just forgot about many things that happened just now and thought they could be friends despite everything. But that is wrong in so many ways. He has to remind himself constantly it seems.
First Subaru got hold of himself and things were more obvious to him. 'Satella' obviously lied to him. The most probable thing was that the name 'Satella' wasn't something positive at all and it meant to make Subaru react in a certain way. However, while Subaru knows the name Satella… he does not know how this world perceives that name.
Satella. That wasn't a name you would give to someone on Earth. But Satella, even though a meaningless word. It had a meaning for him who had certain interests and hobbies. Something he just happened to come up with for embarrassing reasons and if he happened to name a girl like this 'elf' it would be Satella. It was a weird coincidence. No, outright freaky.
It was a name he liked, similar to more or less every name that has to do with stars and space.
Subaru would ask what that name means in this world but that would be weird right after he practically said "It's a fitting name". It would be weird to question its meaning after saying such a thing.
'Maybe… Puck somewhat carried information from my head to this girl and she knowingly chose that name? No way…right?' He dismissed that thought, but the idea stayed inside his head nonetheless.
His thoughts come to an end when the girl regains her composure and coughed to gain his attention. Subaru was leaning on the wall while sitting on the floor to gain some strength. He turned his head towards the girl who called herself Satella so that he could leave. He reminded himself once again. He would not be affected by her innocent and kind demeanor anymore.
If what he wanted was friends then Subaru could gain them if he survives. It doesn't necessarily have to be Satella. The idea of a more normal person to talk to was ironically more attractive than talking to a girl like Satella who was very beautiful and special. He had his reasons for feeling like that.
He snapped out of his thoughts when a light appeared beside him.
"Wait, what—"
"Don't make any sudden moves!" Unlike the last time she told him to not move, her voice oozed with kindness.
"What is this…" He felt good as his body was enveloped in the light Puck created. If he had to guess this would be—
"It's healing magic. You might not know that since it's rare. Puck is not a water spirit but he is good at healing compared to the average spirit. Just stay calm and you will be better." She explained to Subaru.
So I was right. There is healing magic in this world huh? And it's rare too. I wonder if I can acquire it to some level. Puck telling me that I am weak didn't sound like a lie. So there is a chance I might not be able to use magic…
No. I can't accept that. Not this easily. It is very important to me after all. I have come to this world where magic exists. Not being able to use it or giving up from attempting it because someone said so would be impossible for me. I want to do magic.
I got up and focused on the current situation.
"Your thief, she was a short girl with blond hair and red eyes. She was super agile too but I think you already know that." Satella hummed with acknowledgment so I continued.
"Right now, tracking her down will not be probable if we try to find what path she used. So we must go to where your item was stolen. I do not know what it is but it should be small, let's walk towards where the theft happened and you tell me what are you searching for—" I started to walk but Satella held my hand, stopping me.
"It was at this size" She showed how big it was by making a circle with her fingers and continued. "And it is really important for me, so I cannot risk going back right now."
"We are not going back or anything. We will gain information. She was incredibly agile and stole something in daylight. People might know her. We should gain information if we ask the right people." Subaru tried to reason with her… however, after not saying anything for a while Satella decided what was their next move.
"You should wait here. I can trust you if you do that. I will try to reach her, there is a possibility she slowed down when she didn't see me tailing her." Satella told me what she had in mind but I cannot accept that.
"This doesn't make sense. You don't even know what path she took and not to mention you are not even fast enough to close the gap between you two, if you were then you would've done that already when she stole it from you." Come on! Come on! Think Satella! Think!
But no matter how much Subaru struggled she already made up her mind. Once again, Subaru was unnerved by how Puck was silent in all of this. It did not make sense one bit.
"Stay here, even if we find the insignia this girl here isn't the type to leave you alone. You can trust that at least. By the way, healing magic was weirdly compatible with you… It uses water mana so you might have water affinity. I would look at it but we don't have time. You are an unlucky guy Subaru." Puck told him normally, his voice was quite cheerful. Subaru did not stay silent on that of course.
"You would?" He wonders why Puck would help at all.
"Well, It doesn't matter to me. As I said, your gate is incredibly weak, that wasn't a lie so you have no chance of using magic if you ask me, your starting point is just too bad! However, I know you have an affinity, and while it IS irrelevant and pointless. I am honestly curious about what kind of affinity a weird person like you would have. My bet is water even though you miraculously get out of my shadow magic which made me question if you have it but it's very rare so if you want to know my guess… it's probably water." Puck gave his thoughts on the matter. He was the magical being here. So Subaru could accept what he told him. Except for the parts where he couldn't use the magic of course. That wasn't something he could accept.
"Well, thank you I guess. For that one thing alone you have my thanks." Subaru said honestly.
"You are a weird fellow Subaru, everything about you is so… different. It would not be so unpleasant if you weren't so misfortunate. Now let us go Satella-san(1)" As he said that 'Satella' flinched. It was obvious to Puck that I did not believe her 'name'. Because it was so obvious she lied after all. But I saw her being surprised when I answered. As if he knew I wasn't lying. Can he know when I lie? No. He might have a sense in some situations but I saw him looking at me with unsure gazes several times. His ability is not definite if it exists. Maybe even something to take advantage of …if his ability exists that is.
They left my vision after Satella jumped that wall and Puck flew, coming after her.
Once again I learned a lot… I had nothing to do but think about all I learned and everything that transpired.
—It would take approximately 30 minutes before Puck realized perhaps Subaru was right even though their intuition said otherwise.
Emilia POV
Emilia honestly expected to find that thief. However, that did not happen. So they returned together as Puck said.
Puck was acting weird. First, he disliked Subaru like he never did to anyone now he was more inclined to have him around. She didn't understand him at all.
Not as much as she didn't understand that boy though…
'Why did I lie to him anyway… I could just reject him.' As Puck questioned her, Emilia answered that she did not want him to get involved with the Royal Selection business but according to Puck that was the wrong thing to do. Since it seemed I would danger Subaru if he acted as I thought anyway, not to mention harming Roswaal and everything because I admitted to someone that I was the witch.
As we reached back to the certain alleyway I saw him. There was a stick in his hand and some carving on the ground beneath… he was drawing perhaps? It was a childish action expected from him I guess so who am I to judge? Puck told me to not judge people after all.
As I jumped to the alleyway from the roof he wiped all the dirt on the ground and erased his drawing. I guess he was embarrassed.
I reached for Puck with our bond. We could talk without moving our mouths, unlike Subaru.
'Puck did you see what he was doing with the ground?'
'So you actually wonder about that huh? I didn't expect that.'
'Well, I was curious about what he drew… maybe flowers?'
'As expected…But seriously I have no idea what the… what those things mean, so many marked circles, and yet I understand nothing? Don't tell me he… no way.'
'Puck?' Puck was talking about that boy's drawing but I didn't understand anything.
That was because he wasn't talking about Emilia even though he was mindful enough to not swear, his thoughts wandered as he was too focused on what Subaru's markings meant. In this world, soldiers used things to visualize markings on the ground if there is no table for battle planning. Subaru's markings however proved too incomprehensible for him.
"So you finally gave up? Where is Puck?"
"I am right here! But you are in the wrong Subaru… we didn't give up. We just thought maybe it's better we find what is stolen with you instead of leaving you here." He appeared in front of Subaru.
"Don't cover it with fancy words. You gave up after all." Subaru said as if it was a matter of fact. Puck sighed against this, looking defeated. Was it something between the two of them perhaps? They are so weird.
"We couldn't find her at any of the taverns," I said to Subaru. He made a slightly surprised face.
"Taverns huh? So, Puck, you thought she would be making deals with someone by now"
"That's correct." Puck said lively as he moved his tail and made a circle with it. "Did you think there is a problem with that?"
"Well… more like I didn't think you thought anything when you decided to go for a search and it was totally instinctual."
'Puck… isn't that right? Did you tell Subaru about it?' Puck said he had a feeling after all.
'Yes… and no. How can I talk to Subaru without you knowing that anyway?'
'That seems right. How weird… maybe Subaru can see the future?'
I heard Puck sigh in my mind. I didn't know he could do that while we talked with our minds…
As he sighed in his mind once again. He started speaking to Subaru.
"Do you think it was the wrong choice to check the taverns?"
"It depends. Does she normally go out?"
"That's awfully rude for you to ask and creepy of you to be correct about. This is the first time we are in the capital and we left the maid because she got excited since it was her first time… well I was here before but it was way before you eve—"
"Yes, yes. You are a mighty being who lived for hundreds of years so you were here when I didn't exist. Spare me that. Not interested in your age." Though he said that… Subaru noted in his mind that it might've been the opposite since if time moved in a certain way in his origin then that would mean Subaru existed far before Puck—or even this world.
"That's not a way to talk to someone who lived when your grandparents didn't even exist you know?" Puck said jokingly. I did not understand the joke but he was right. Subaru was a boy after all. I was at least a hundred years old and Puck was even older. To us, Subaru is like a baby(2).
"Yeah… that's a common trap to fall into in fiction settings. However, from a human growth perspective, you are not even fully matured Puck-san, and slightly younger than me if I were to guess… As for Satella… yeah. I don't think there is a human age stage for her state since if we go too low then they can't even talk at that age." I didn't even understand a single thing he said. Subaru was such a weird boy.
"What does that mean?" Puck was genuinely curious as Subaru asked this. While Emilia was unable to follow. It was the first time anyone answered when Puck talked or let's say 'flaunted' about his long life.
"You won't understand even if I tell you. You are not a human after all, and neither is Satella. I am not saying anyone but humans can understand but you need to have a certain lifespan limit with various stages. From what I know elves… stop growing after a while. It makes me curious if your body would grow any more Satella-san." Subaru's eyes started to analyze her body, for some reason Emilia felt excited and nervous.
Subaru was thinking if her boobs or any other feminine part would develop further.
Puck, however, slapped Subaru's cheek with his tail.
"Nope! She completed her growth. No room for imagination. ZERO!"
"However biased that sounded. I think you have a way to know so I'll drop the subject."
"Yes, you can understand that when you know her body inside-out."
Subaru grows a big smile making Puck think about what he just said however that smile doesn't last long.
"You…" Puck lifted his belt tail threateningly.
"It's not my fault you put it together like that. I am joking! Anyway, The reason it's important is that the insignia sounds pretty specific. You were right to think there is a deal behind too, after all, no one but someone close to you could inform the thief that you were coming"
'Of course, it wasn't just that. After all, even if they presumably left with ground dragons then the information should travel way faster… knowing how these things more or less have the speed of a car. That's distant communication, it has to be. I doubt everyone has it. It has to be someone powerful besides this girl. Hence both the maid in question and the master are incredibly suspicious. Of course, I will keep that to myself for now after all we are not close enough and they don't even believe me when it comes to the simplest things. Not to mention they have telepathy, making their thought process unpredictable.'
Subaru had time to think and calm himself. When he did that many things got cleared to him. Slowly he deduced many things and absorbed all the new knowledge he gained. One of the easiest things to figure out was the telepathy between Satella and Puck. That one thing calmed him down. He got more confident as he learned about things and figured out mysteries.
Possibility of him having 'spirit art affinity'.
Satella is a very high-ranked noble.
Puck has no morals and Satella subconsciously turns a blind eye to it.
Where to go and what to do.
His magic affinity.
And so much more.
He had made lots of plans. And visualized them with unrelated marks. It was obvious to him that Puck got close to it and checked them while he was invisible. His theory was proven when Puck appeared right beside him and not close to Satella.
He ripped out of his deep thoughts when he felt a bad feeling Puck was looking at him worse than ever before. What just happened? Satella also looked at her with distrustful eyes.
"You. How do you know about insignia?" He could feel the temperature dropping. Death was close. But even though he might just die, Subaru finds it ridiculous he was being threatened by both of them. They both released their magic but Subaru was unfazed.
Because—
"You told me? It was you who said 'insignia' first. I just went along with it."
It was hilarious. Inability to keep a piece of vital information against someone you do not trust. They could not even manage that. But that was why they were so dangerous.
—Even though they are so thoughtless and make bad decisions all the time. Satella was naive about the world and had an idealistic outlook on things and Puck was confident and ignorant even with all the years he lived.
They could afford to live like this. They must be compensated with their power and grand fate or something. I cannot think of any other way. Some people are just born better in this world. Satella is living proof of that.
Let's say. Not me. Since I am so weak. But what if, someone with some common sense and perseverance went against these two…would they be able to defeat them? Or just fate interferes and they just win conveniently? I do not know.
I have these thoughts even though I thought about being friends with Satella. Now I realize it's not because I am a bad person or anything. It's just these two are walking time bombs and even if I never get involved they would probably affect my life in some way.
As my thoughts come to an end. I realized these two forgot about my existence and kept talking telepathically. This once again reminded me.
—Even though I do not know my place in this world, we are so different and that will never change.
Idealistically, we will click because we are different and opposites attract each other.
Realistically, they will never understand my problems and I will always be conscious of their convenience while never turning blind eye to the danger they present.
"Let's go to the place where your insignia is stolen." I started to walk ahead trying to be decisive for the two.
It's time to find this insignia.
"Stop it already." I interfered with an angry voice.
Satella and Puck. I have no hold of them because of my objectively lower position compared to them and they kept looking left and right without listening to me, wasting precious time. Finally, as we got close to our destination. I saw a lonely child crying. I was going to help but then for some reason, Satella decided she would be the one doing it because my scary eyes were… scary and I would certainly make her cry.
I knew it was more about the selfish reason to connect with people than my scary eyes since her appearance was somewhat eye-catching in a bad way. But she can't just achieve her ambition by traumatizing a child. This was one of the things where I didn't give a shit about my position.
"W-what? Didn't I say—"
"Sorry, but I cannot watch this anymore." The way she got close to her was a problem too. She just got close to her, said 'everything is gonna be okay' and then started to pet her head viciously. The girl did not take that well.
I crouched to get to her eye level. Even by doing that she calmed down.
After making a magic trick with a Japanese coin that affected Satella more than the child herself… I held her hand and we started to go towards the appa seller since the girl's description fit that guy.
"I still can't seem to match that thief you talk about with anyone in my head…" Subaru and Satella successfully brought little Plum to her mother's arms. Which helped man to try a little bit harder to remember if he knew anyone matching Subaru's description. However, that did not change the result.
The appa seller no matter how buffed and violent he looked wasn't even close to being a slum dweller. In Subaru's mind, he was the most trustworthy person he knew in this world. He couldn't even be sure about the knight who talked to him(since their interaction was so short) even then, he was hoping they could be friends one day. However, unlike that knight appa guy wasn't a kind charming extrovert. He had a good heart since he agreed to listen to Subaru even before he learned they helped plum. But still, he was a rude person and that rudeness was real. It was something Subaru could trust.
"Let me grab this for a second." He grabbed the pen and ripped out a sale paper stuck to the wood nearby and turned it to use the empty side of it.
"Oi! Aren't you a little bit too lively?" Appa guy said while grunting. He didn't understand what that broke kid was doing, however, he voiced his annoyance.
Satella on the other hand got angry that Subaru's love for drawing got in the way of things.
Subaru ignored the appa seller and didn't even think of saying anything to Satella knowing she had a crack take on the situation. Subaru's heart was pounding, he put all the skill he had into his work. Visualization. Seeing things with eyes might help him to remember that girl so that they can have information. Subaru thought perhaps he was doing that for nothing… but he also trusted the thief's popularity, that girl with supernatural speed was bold enough to steal in daylight… she must be popular to a degree.
"It's done," Subaru said after wiping the sweat on his forehead.
"Hey kid, I don't think that is the way to go— Isn't that Felt? Damn, it worked? You might not be a broke kid if you chase some job where you can use that drawing of yours." At some point, the appa man caught the gist of what Subaru was trying but didn't think it would mean anything. However, the results of the drawing proved him wrong.
"Wow… Subaru, that's a pretty girl." Subaru ignored her and turned towards the guy.
"Who is she? Where does she live? How can we find her?" If it was left to Subaru he would also ask what her powers were and what weapon she uses but he stopped himself since there was a possibility this guy wouldn't tell about her if he thought they were out for blood.
Subaru got all the information he needed for the insignia and some more. This was it. Now he would get that insignia. He did not know why he made such a goal… he had reasons but none of them was enough to justify this to a satisfactory degree. He was either mad or he could not see something inside of his heart. He wanted to think he liked Satella more than he was supposed to… because the other option was that he turned—No that can't be. He couldn't be going mad. Nothing happened so far to turn him that way.
It would be his madness inside of him coming to the light as he started anew in this world if that were true. Subaru did not forget about his unnatural reaction to being dumped into a new world or his changing—adapting self. Calmness doesn't always mean you are in the right mind. But he couldn't be occupied with that thought for a while. Someone in this party needed to use their brain.
"Thank you very much! When I have money I'll be sure to buy appa!" Satella said with a grateful voice.
Subaru's feelings weren't much different than hers at that moment.
But he decided to show that with his actions in the future.
By any means necessary. He would remain in this world until the very end. And to achieve that, he had to remain long enough to buy appa's from that man.
'A ridiculous goal to aim indeed,' he thought.
As they walked. Subaru thought about one thing.
What was wrong with Satella and Puck?
They were not evil. However, Subaru wished they were. It would be more understandable to him.
They were both beings of light, he did not want to admit but Puck was a bright existence comparable to Satella.
It was beyond logic but he could feel the legendary path ahead of the two.
That being said. He did not trust them.
When put into reasons by using logic he had so many reasons to not trust them.
But there was also something about them.
He disliked it so much.
As if no matter what these two did, there would be no consequences. They probably had reasons to be able to live without thinking about their actions. It wasn't unthinkable that some people had greater importance than others in this world to a level that was decided from birth. Satella and Puck were just that.
That left him questioning.
If Puck turned me into dust or Satella's actions led me to my death, let's say I didn't have enough energy in me to call for help.
What would be the consequences of that? That was him losing his life after all. His life.
Subaru asked that question but the answer was one that he could not accept yet.
But he knew the answer deep down.
—Nothing.
"Hey Subaru, why can't we ask them for the place?" Satella asked Subaru one more time. She wanted to be assured more than wanting to know that's because she already knew the answer. Or she should know. Both Subaru and Puck started to doubt if she was forgetting each time she got the answer.
"This is me answering you for the fifth time. Everyone here knows each other. One can easily give a false location while we are fooling around and someone else can snitch about our arrival, making the whole mission impossible." Subaru said with no emotion whatsoever. He was trying desperately to not snap at her.
They continued to walk. Subaru got some key locations from the appa guy so that can know they are in the right direction. They already passed every single location. He was going in the right direction.
"Hey… tell me, why are they looking at us so intently?" Subaru asked nervously. Things that he had no idea about made him nervous.
"That's because of me… because I look like this" Satella said with a bittersweet smile screamed 'That's always how it is she had the aura of sadness coming out of her.
However, Subaru did not agree with her.
'Satella thinks of herself as if she is an extreme victim of racism. I already figured out she was looking like someone no one liked. But it's not like everyone stopped to look at her or cared about her enough to hate her. She is extremely self-conscious and it made her delusional as well' (3) Subaru ended that thought quickly because his nervousness— no, fear had nothing to do with that.
What made him scared was, they were looking at HIM.
Someone who just arrived in this world and has no connection to any supernatural powers whatsoever.
Why don't they stop looking at him?
What made him more scared was ironically when he tried to imitate one of them just by looking and they actually ran away with their horrified faces.
HE DID NOT UNDERSTAND.
But that did not matter right now.
Because they arrived.
"Don't you think we should've bought lagmite ore Subaru? Though it's not like I have much time left even though I preserved more mana for today." Puck asked Subaru while he was in his physical form, assuming he knew what lagmite ore was. It was an ore with many users and it was very common. Something you can find anywhere.
Subaru wanted to know more about that but instead… he just held his cell phone and used its flashlight.
"Wow, a meteor… not to mention I can't even feel it using any mana. Suspicious." Half teasing, somewhat suspicious, and also surprised Puck commented on his cell phone.
"So we have to enter this obviously dangerous building huh? Well, let's get going. I doubt that anything in the slums can be dangerous to you guys." Subaru said nonchalantly.
But they did not follow.
"Huh?"
"Get in first Subaru, perhaps you might be useful. Even if not, at least you will become a meat shield."
"H-huh? What are y-you saying?" He couldn't believe what he was hearing.
"It's our deal, isn't it? You are going to help us retrieve the insignia."
"What are you saying! Didn't I help enough so far? You guys should enter! I am simply not qualified against any attack."
"You helped? What did you do that we couldn't do anyway? " Puck said casually as if he was acting too, but why?
Subaru felt betrayed. Even though he hated Puck at least he thought—
"Well, Puck is putting it a bit harshly. But it would be a lie if I said you didn't hold us back." Satella said in a way it was kind but it hit Subaru harder than Puck's words.
"What the… Just asking. W-what would you guys do?"
"I mean, I could've just asked for spirits to tell us about… anything we want to know. But you don't have to do anything. You can just go away." Satella said somewhat apologetically but with utmost honesty.
Subaru knew she wasn't lying.
However, that did not stop the frustration that grew inside of him.
"Shit… whatever, I am going inside." He said with an angry voice without looking back.
"Subaru… when we are finished I will apollo–"
"No. Please stay conscious of your actions for the rest of your life. It might do more good to you than closing your eyes and ears to everything." Subaru said harshly, acting unnatural. But he couldn't care less. He was frustrated.
He steps inside. They already knocked on the door before and no one answered.
'What a shitty start to have in another world' Subaru was the type that would be fine with a start with normal difficulty with some tutorial. He never saw himself as the one that would get special treatment. Those days were far gone. It's almost as if his fantasies for another world changed as he grew.
'No time to think about that.'
He kept going inside while holding the light. Swords were hanging in places… shields, and armors. This place had a history, right? No way this could be the average shop in slums.
'If the owner is dangerous enough to handle many weapons… fuck, why did I even get inside alone? I have to be retarded for doing that' Subaru realized his grave mistake and he had to swallow his pride.
"Hey, Satella… can you come in? I am quite scared and I don't want some master blacksmith to use my blood as a substance for his cursed sword. I am not that worthy but yours would do well." Subaru said while trying to conceal his nervousness. Why was he so scared? So far it was only dark.
And why Satella isn't saying anything?
Why?
He stepped back a few times. His body was shaking. He had to get out, take the plastic bag he left outside and run away.
But he couldn't why?
Why is Satella silent?
Why Puck isn't saying anything?
Why was he so…..scared.
'That's because… blood.' His brain stopped denying reality… the scent of blood already reached his nose a little while ago. But he only reacted now, only when he accepted the reality.
'Oh fuck… Satella isn't saying anything that's…' She is dead?
But as he pointed his phone to the floor he saw the blood. It was dry, dried long ago to be exact. At least.
Then the one who did the killings was already gone—
!
As he was going to relax he felt something, all the hair on his body started to go up. The chill went down his spine. It was similar to the time when Puck showed his animosity the first time. He didn't even react to it after the first time but no way Subaru could get used to this one. This was another level. Making Puck's killing intent feel like a kitten hissing at you.
And it was coming from—-
"There!" Subaru quickly turned back. Whoever that was he had no chance of winning. That's why he tried to get the advantage. Set his phone to take many photos at once while the flashlight is at full brightness. If he could take their vision then—-
"Unfortunately for you, I don't need my eyes~"
A woman appeared before Subaru doing nothing but smiling at him with a luscious look, the second she appeared in front of him his phone was severed into two at that moment Subaru's body moved accordingly, he held her shoulders and moved her towards him then kicked her on the perineum.
"Augh~ Ooh… I certainly~. I definitely felt that one. To think you would go hit there when I expected you to freeze."
The world darkened as Subaru's light source died. However, as he was breathing heavily and could not see anything… the world started to lighten up bit by bit. Giving him the vision of his soon-to-be murderer. The erotic look on her face was absurd and the revealing clothes she wore were totally inappropriate. Her weight was of a normal woman's, and there were no supernatural muscles on her vagina for fuck sake so why the fuck this woman didn't at least go down for a while… if she did Subaru would stab her with her own knife, and crush her skull— Why the fuck he had to deal with this?
"Ara~~? Are you unhappy with not receiving my attention? I was just thinking if I should pay back for your little gift. But as a man, you were successful in pleasuring me no matter how rough you were so I will let you keep your manhood for that reason." She was totally honest about that. It didn't matter how perverted she was. It was obvious that she was pissed off to a point with Subaru's actions. A contradiction of a woman's heart perhaps.
"You sicken me. Are you getting flirty with all the guys before you kill them? Let me tell you that It just doesn't matter how good you look or any quality you have. Show any intimacy that is romantic to any man and it's a one-shot turn-off for me and no before you say that, killing them doesn't change anything. My once soon-to-be girlfriend asked before so I was ready for that question." Subaru said as he was no longer in the right mind.
The woman in black laughed at that with joy after having a blank face for a few seconds.
"Ah… you are truly an amusing man you know~? I never thought anyone can be this cracked in the head while being absolutely no one special. Yet you have your own brand of madness. It's quite fine. Actually being different is a special quality I like in a man. I can't have someone that has no darkness in them."
"While it's appreciated you don't call me a boy my words still stand, I am not interested. It's not you, it's me. The magic dispels the moment you look at someone else with the same eyes."
"You don't seem to react to me calling you mad… I am saying it again. You are not normal. Please don't run away from that… I want to see that directly coming from your eyes. Don't make excuses about your sanity… My colleagues and mother, when it comes to people that are not normal, I am an expert so you are definitely a mad mister~ I was watching you before so it's not a near-death situation either. I hope you are satisfied with that." The woman in black was quite serious about making Subaru accept that 'Subaru' she was seeing in his eyes. Subaru did not understand why the fuck anyone would attempt such a—
"You…were watching? Don't tell me…"
"Yes~ Your mind works very well considering this situation. Indeed. They are both dead. Meaningless death following the end of a disgusting creature." The woman with obvious interests said to the dense man matter of factly.
"Don't fuck with me. They are both over-fucking-powered no way they are dead."
"No, they certainly fall to my knife." Deep down he knew those words were true but he could not accept them. He was hoping for them to come in. So that he could survive.
"Shut up bitch. You are lying. You are the type that plays with your food and I am not as interesting as those two."
"..." Woman stayed silent as Subaru said those words and closed her eyes for a while. Subaru wondered if calling her like that would be his death. But what happened was giggles coming out of her mouth.
The feeling came out of the woman as she giggled and creeped him out.
"Yes… that's how it was supposed to be. Yet it was nothing but a disappointment. I was quite angry at you for making their ugliness come out. But you alone gave me the excitement I was expecting differently even though you are so terribly weak. Oh yes, at least you share my frustration about how weak you are. If you were stronger you could do much more than kick me in the wrong place~ but unfortunately, it's a fantasy that can't come true for both of us." The woman said those words as if she could smell Subaru's anger stemming from his weakness.
"That being said… let me correct one thing you are wrong about." The woman closed her eyes and prepared to speak of her love.
"I am not usually like this with my prey."
She was in front of him, closer than ever before. Their heights were similar, the woman is a little bit shorter than Subaru. A perfect height that helped her appreciate his masculine jawline and his black eyes reminded her abyss itself, locked with hers and only hers.
She appeared in front of him, it was not unlike teleportation to Subaru's eyes. He knew that was because of the insane speed woman possessed.
Subaru thought about all of that and also added one more thing.
—-Her hand gets inside of his stomach with unnatural ease.
"It's just your eyes are so fierce and dark. Making me excited like this~"
As Subaru realized she gutted him with her own hands he made his last moves.
Punching the woman's face trying to rip her ear and many other things.
The woman blocked every move that might gross him out if he were to succeed. She did not want him to see her with her eyes gouged or without ears. But she took everything else with pleasure.
As Subaru's strength started to leave his body, the woman was still blushing madly. She slowly descends his body to the ground. Not wanting to accelerate his death and waste the time she can spend with him.
"T-tell me…" Subaru muttered. Elsa's hand still touched his bowels but it wasn't for the sake of stopping him from bleeding. Subaru could feel the pervertedness in the touch.
"Ask me and I shall."
"You…uh…waited… so fucking ah… long. These…events…"
"How you might know tha…oh… blood." Woman reached Subaru's understanding just when she was about to ask him. Dried blood was the giveaway. She had already hidden the bodies but she did not clean the blood.
"The thing is… she was the bait."
"So…y-you…waited…till it was fucking night?!" Subaru rejected her words.
The woman giggled with amusement once more.
"I see. So you understood even that huh? I see… then I might just tell you. I was specifically ordered to wait. I did not know what I was waiting for but it told the mother that I was to be ordered to wait in this place until very, very late." She answered Subaru's question. She had no intention to hide anything and she did not. She just assumed Subaru would know it being gospel. It wasn't a secret anyway.
She also had things to say.
"That spirit… even though I never see the insides of a spirit before he disgusts me. His eyes, the way he talked… I have a good gut feeling about such things. The way that girl acted self-centered while forgetting about you was a turn-off too. I do not like people out of touch with reality happening in front of them. I can't connect with such prey so I just wanted to look at her bowels while I was still interested. Her insides were pretty but that was it. No warmth at all. When she died… let's say spirit proved my gut feeling correct. Believe me, he is a true scum. It's better you die to me than that thing. At least I am not that. I don't want you to think anything but me right now so I'll just say that killing that thing made me the hero here~ But I don't like heroes so I will not take credit. I might take the girl's head and send it to that man perhaps. That would be amusing… I don't like his eyes either so I want to see some interesting emotions in those pathetic eyes.." It looked like she was having a heart-to-heart with Subaru… who she just gutted with her own hands.
"I don't normally use my hands… I used my blade but for some reason, your flesh did not sever. I thought I missed it even though that was impossible…and no, I did not miss it. By some miracle, your skin stayed attached. But don't get me wrong I am not complaining. It was by far the most intimate method I came up with. Never thought I would use my hands for anyone unless they break all my weapons… that's the way of Bowel Hunter after all." At any point in her talk, she never stopped blushing or the obvious signs of arousal. She never stopped caressing Subaru's bowels too. Subaru did not care, he wanted to live, wanted to continue his existence. But part of him actually listened to her.
—Perhaps she was right after all. He was mad.
"Shitty nick..name." Subaru learned that it wasn't a lie that people can live long while their insides are open… he was turning the living proof that historical tortures might be horrifying as they are told.
His thoughts were all over the place unless he focused on her words. It's almost as if she was his lifeline. It was stupid.
"Is that so… then what about my name… I will not give it unless you give me yours." She knew his name. She had heard from the lips of that girl. However, she disliked that. She wanted to hear it from his mouth.
"Natsuki Subaru… the man who will fucking…choke you." Utmost conviction and belief in those words even though he was at death's door. It made her heart skip a beat. If it was anyone else they would not say those words, they could not. But this man did not care about being a fool.
"That's a lovely name… so different. Never heard that name before. You know… I really like you… You are making me feel very, very~ excited and in such cases, a man like you should take the responsibility for it. I actually thought about making you take responsibility you know? If not for the orders of mother… no, actually I would even take that risk for you if not for my sister."
"I will…fuck…your…mother."
"That's… No. But if you could kill her once and for all that would be appreciated. If you are going to do what you say to someone…" Before finishing her sentence, she slowly descended on his ear. "That would be me~" She whispered it into his ear with a sultry voice that would make any man go crazy. However, Subaru thought at that moment that no man could handle this woman. He was disgusted. She was disgusting. She would die on his end. But he was the most insane and incomprehensible being for thinking such things because…
Absolute ruin was nearing Subaru.
His monstrous will to live could not allow him to live longer than this. That wound would not heal itself.
"You know I wouldn't mind…"
He could feel the concept of life was leaving him.
"Even if you detested me."
This woman's voice would be the last thing he would hear.
"Because I believe that if our meeting was different we could be bound by your loathing."
Her face was clear to Subaru.
And it would be the last thing he would see.
"My name is Elsa Granhiert."
But every part of his being screamed. Whether it be his consciousness or soul.
"And I am jealous of the angels that will have you for themselves."
—This is not how it ends.
The end.
That's what happened. It was over.
In this dark void, there was nobody or anything. It was a place where darkness reigned.
But… his consciousness stayed as it is. Ever Changing as his consciousness was… it could only be changed by the accumulation he received from his progress. His soul rejected every type of afterlife offered by this world, magic itself and even beyond.
When he was forced. His existence annihilated his own soul, the culmination of his being.
This is where he ended up. A place that doesn't exist. Because existence did not perceive this place let alone acknowledge it.
This was not just death. It was the very concept of death. The end.
…
But this was not how it ended.
His consciousness was still here and burning desire yearned for one thing.
It wasn't rejecting the end. He wanted a satisfactory ending.
He would not let fate take it from him.
He would not.
It wasn't Pride.
It wasn't anything that came from that either.
It was nothing but…
—Determination.
Feel… so…foggy.
Can't hear… it's almost as if my ears are ringing because of an explosion.
Can't see… it's just black but something is happening in my vision.
I need to… wake up. See. Hear.
As I yearned for that… the world started to make sense.
"Hey—"
What happened?
"Appa—"
Who am I?
"Broke—"
Then I felt something wet on my face
Everything came up to me, my life from start to its ending.
And now—
"You finally opened your eyes… Do you want appa?"
I opened my eyes to a new beginning. As I did. I understand so much more.
I had died and returned from it.
This was more acceptable than the truth that I died and everything ended right there.
That was unacceptable because…
—I will not let things END like that. My story will not END unless I feel like ending it.
Yep. If you read all of that. I hope you like it… and Elsa. She has so much potential with Subaru. I mean, her character shines when she is with him and only when she is with him, unfortunately. Maybe some Meili moments too. For your info, Meili will be in arc 1 of this story too. Favorite and Follow if you like the story.
As for notes:
(1): Side story where we see stuff from Emilia POV. Puck calls her like this. A fun touch I added thinking that it fits, also showing how Puck can be insensitive even to her. And no, the side story is totally useless and shows nothing important or makes sense why the fuck she called herself Satella or anything. She just does it. Interpretations accepted by the community vary but all of them have holes in them. BIG HOLES. I made it so it was because she just attempted to escape to her comfort zone (being hated) so she calls herself Satella and waits for hate that would not come.
(2): Just predicting that people will tell me I go too far with this comment and Emilia isn't… like this. No. We are currently at Arc 7 of Re: Zero where everyone expects her to confess and yet she seriously said everyone is a child to her except Beatrice because her age(with time spent on ice) is way higher than theirs. Yes, it's canon that to Emilia everyone acts like children… Roswaal too(she doesn't know his age.)
(3): This will be controversial as fuck. But I was the same as you guys thinking this Emilia was hated a lot and writing the whole chapter based on that then I realized that doesn't make fucking sense and had to rewrite. She gets defended by the whole crowd when Subaru calls her Satella in arc 1. The only folks she is hated to a high level are the villagers in a forest SHE froze with her ICE magic and in politics where everyone uses whatever they can against you. Actually, it's weird she was saying everyone hates her with no exception when we have Annarose and Julius canonically admiring her, and one outright simp her. So in this fic, this is Emilia's own delusion. She thinks everyone cares enough for her to hate her. But in reality… people are just cautious with her most of the time and that's actually totally understandable.
Well, about Subaru's thoughts about the name 'Satella'. As you know, every bishop name, witch name, and pretty much everything important in re-zero as in name usually has a connection with Subaru's hobbies etc. and some of them are a big red sign for Subaru, waiting to be acknowledged but he never does.
Subaru probably possesses the secret of the world and does not care. So while we, readers do not know about the name Satella it may very well have meaning to Subaru. That is why I crafted one for this fic. And no, Subaru won't be ignoring the fact that every abomination in history has a star name from his world or the sage tower has his name on it. I will never do it in any of my fics. He will always have a reason why the fuck he turned a blind eye and will always think about it eventually.
Elsa's love and interest for Subaru might be weird however Subaru here isn't joking around like arc 1 Subaru or acts like a clown. He is himself. He has no reason to act like someone else either. So everything is laid bare and Elsa likes what she sees. You might say it's a losing Subaru so why she is so interested? I asked that question myself but unlike Envybaru who Elsa dislikes in failed loops because of how he gives up etc. the failed loop, we see in Pride IF shows a very different picture. That is why even while losing Elsa interested in him.
So you might ask if Subaru with no death count got her interest then a Subaru with a goal and death count would be…. Yeah… she will be a lot more INTERESTED than this version of her.
Subaru btw… realized how weird for Elsa to wait so long for no reason. He literally sensed/understood that everything that transpired is an anomaly and he lost to fate. Though he rejects that. Now he will have in his mind SOMETHING(IT Elsa talks about which is gospel) that can predict the future. We will see how Subaru will react to that and his assumptions…
Do not expect the story to move like in canon. Subaru WILL use this arc 1 to the fullest and we will see him literally puppeteer some characters while feeling bad(some he won't feel bad) it's just the nature of things. If he doesn't then out-of-control shit hits him. What I mean is things won't be moving similarly to canon. One thing is… Pandora is actually pretty near. Arc 2 to be exact.
And as for closure. I actually foreshadowed a meeting of Subaru with every candidate in this chapter. Idk if anyone can find though. Thank you very much for reading.