he who loses everything and falls into insanity

by Screaming Fae

Asylum!AU, no magic. When Sirius vanishes from home, Walburga claims that he has run away with Remus, but Regulus suspects foul play, and soon finds out what really happened. He seeks the help of Remus and his ex in order to save him. Warning for homophobia, cruelty in hospitals, fade to black, suggestive themes

…

Regulus Black lay back on his brother's bed, looking up at the peeling paint of the ceiling. Where have you gone? He wondered idly. Why would you run away and leave all this stuff behind?

He propped himself up on his elbows and looked around Sirius's bedroom. It was as though Sirius had just gone out to visit his friend, and was planning to come back in the next hour or so—not that he'd been missing for two weeks. His wardrobe door was still ajar, with clothes hanging over the chair beside it. A pair of converse trainers had been kicked by the door. His bedspread had been hastily flung over the bed.

Then there were all of Sirius's favourite things, that Regulus was sure he would never leave behind—not willingly. A faded Mötley Crüe t-shirt that he had signed by the bassist when he went to their concert (Nicky something-or-other, Regulus couldn't remember the name, even though Sirius had gone on about it for long enough). His Dr Martens, which he spent two weeks wages to buy, because Mother refused to allow him to spend Black family money on 'ridiculous fashion'. But most importantly, there was a wallet-sized leather photo album containing pictures of Sirius and all his friends. Sirius usually had to hide it in his bedside cabinet from Mother, and he normally tucked it in his pocket and took it out with him whenever he left the house.

Regulus reached over for the nightstand and dug around in the drawers. There, hidden underneath half a dozen pairs of rolled up socks was the photo album. Regulus absent-mindedly flipped through it, smiling at the pictures of Sirius goofing off with his mates. There were several photos of Sirius with his arm thrown around a mousy-haired boy with a scarred face and amber eyes, and some where their arms were linked intimately, and even one where Sirius was kissing the boy on the cheek. It was Remus Lupin, and the reason that Sirius had apparently run away—according to Mother, anyway.

Mother had been awfully upset when she learned about Sirius and Remus being closer than she had originally thought. So upset in fact, that they'd had an explosive argument that lasted for hours, to the point where Father didn't just shut himself up in his study like normal, but actually left the house to pay a visit to Aunt Lucretia. Regulus had hid in his bedroom like a coward, terrified to try and help or defend his brother because what if Sirius told her about—

Regulus's thoughts tailed off as he flicked further through the album and settled on a group photo of Sirius and his three friends—Remus, Peter and James. His eyes lingered on James, who was standing behind Sirius, slightly taller than him, grinning cheekily at the camera. The snap had been taken right as James was trying to smooth down his scruffy black hair—a fruitless effort.

Regulus shut the album quickly and tucked it into the pocket of his jeans. There was no way that Sirius would leave something so sentimental behind.

He wouldn't leave without saying bye to Regulus.

The dinner bell rang at that moment, and Regulus slipped out of his brother's room, making a mental note to try and ask Mother and Father about Sirius's whereabouts during dinner. He'd asked a few times up until now, as he hadn't believed Mother's excuse since the first day he'd been missing.

It turned out that Regulus wouldn't have to wait much longer to find out what had happened.

As he walked down the corridor towards the dining room, he heard Mother's voice ricocheting off the walls as she argued with Father. Regulus stopped in his tracks and flattened himself against the wall, sneaking closer so he could eavesdrop.

"I told you, Walburga, the boy must be removed from that place. Word is going to get out that he has been sent there, and how do you think that will fare for us? You are going to make an embarrassment of our family name! We will be ruined."

"No one will find out about his being there!" Walburga hissed. "I paid Abraxas a substantial amount to keep him somewhere private, where he wouldn't be recognised by any...visitors. Abraxas hasn't even told his own son, and Lucius is working as the administrator there."

"I don't like this," Orion continued. "I don't like this at all. We are lying to our son—you don't think he won't work out that Sirius isn't on the other side of London? I see him sneaking into Sirius's bedroom on an evening. He's suspicious, Walburga. How can you lie to him so brazenly?"

"It's for his own good," sneered Walburga. "It's for everyone's own good—especially Sirius's. He needs to be treated. He is sick."

"You are sick, woman," snarled Orion. "You should be in that place, with those lunatics. Sirius is my heir!"

"He is not worthy of being the heir to our inheritance or our family! He deserves nothing from us, after his disgusting relations with that boy."

"He could have been married off and we could have all forgotten about this...relationship. You didn't have to send him to St. Mungo's!"

Regulus froze against the wall. St. Mungo's. He knew that place—it was a hospital in the south of London. A special hospital. A hospital that treated people for psychiatric conditions. It was owned by the Malfoy family, who Regulus knew were good friends of Mother and Father. They portrayed an exemplary service to the outer world, but Regulus had heard whispers and rumours of the true nature of what went on behind the closed doors. People that were sent to St. Mungo's rarely came back out, and if they did, it was usually in a body bag.

If Sirius was in that place, he wouldn't survive. Regulus worried about what state he could be in now, after just two weeks. He had to get him out of there—but first, he had to sit through dinner with his parents, and pretend that he hadn't just heard everything.

He stepped into the dining room, causing Mother to stop her screaming fit—almost comically frozen with her finger pointing at Orion and her mouth hanging open. She instantly sat down beside her husband, smoothing out her skirt. "Regulus, darling. I hope we didn't disturb you."

"This isn't over, Walburga," Orion tried to keep his voice quiet, but Regulus heard him clearly.

"I heard the dinner bell." Regulus sat down across from Father, looking at his hands. He didn't want to make eye contact with Mother in case she could tell he was lying.

"I hope you didn't hear your father and I…"

"No, of course not." Regulus looked up as one of the servants came in with a dinner tray. "Oh, finally. I'm so hungry." He smiled—in what he hoped was a reassuring way—at his parents, and picked up his knife and fork.

They ate in silence, and Regulus didn't really taste any of the food. He concentrated on chewing and swallowing, all the while planning his next move. Mother watched him curiously across the table, but she didn't ask him any more questions.

…

The kettle had just started whistling when there was a knock at the door. Remus Lupin put his mug down on the counter and furrowed his brow, before glancing at the clock. It was almost midnight—Remus had been planning on taking a mug of hot chocolate to bed with him and staring at the picture of Sirius on his bedside table.

Who would be visiting him in the middle of the night without calling first?

He thought about ignoring the knock, but then his heart gave a lurch. What if it's Sirius? That was the only encouragement he needed, and he rushed to the door, pulling it open without even looking through the spyhole.

It wasn't Sirius—but it was close. Standing on the doormat with a sombre expression was Sirius's little brother, Regulus. He had a rucksack thrown over his shoulder and a large holdall under his arm, and was wearing a sweatshirt with the hood pulled over his face, as though he'd been trying to make sure no one would recognise him.

"Regulus?" Remus said quizzically. "What are you doing here?" Remus hadn't seen Regulus for some time, not since he went to university the year before.

"I have to talk to you," Regulus said urgently. "It's about Sirius."

…

"Sirius is in St. Mungo's?" It was the first and only thing Remus said after Regulus was finished explaining, and he'd managed to wrap his head around everything Regulus had just said.

Regulus nodded solemnly.

"How can you be sure?" Remus had his fingers threaded around his mug as he leaned across the table, scanning Regulus's face. "What if...what if this is just your mother trying to throw you off the scent? Sirius could still be...he could still be…"

Regulus frowned at Remus. Remus didn't want to believe that Sirius could be in such a god-awful place, so he was trying to conjure up whatever other excuse he could think of. "My mother isn't that clever, Remus," Regulus replied quietly. "If she was, she might have tried to keep her voice down when she was arguing so loudly with my father about it. I'm sorry—I know it's awful news, but it's true. I don't know why I didn't figure it out sooner—she always said she'd have Sirius thrown in an asylum if he ever disobeyed her. I just wish…"

Remus raised an eyebrow. "What?"

Regulus slumped over the table and buried his face in his hands. "That night, before Sirius went missing...before she took him. They had a huge argument. I could have...I could have done something, or said something. But I hid in my room because I was scared that Mother would find out about…I was such a fucking coward."

Remus didn't say anything for a long time. He wasn't sure what to think, or what to even say. Eventually he reached out and took one of Regulus's hands. "Sirius wouldn't blame you, Regulus. He knows as well as you what it's like living with your parents."

"Worse than me," Regulus murmured. "Mother always did treat him worse. And I never did anything."

"What could you have done?" Remus sat up straight and drank the last of his tea. He set his jaw firmly, trying to appear more confident than he was. "Listen, there's no point dwelling over the past now. The most important thing is that you've found out where he is. Does your mum know you've left the house?"

Regulus shook his head, and put his rucksack on the table. "I'm due back at university in a couple of weeks, so I told them I was going to spend the week with a friend in the dorms before I go back. I know I should have called you first, but I was hoping…"

Remus nodded. "You can stay here. Even if I wanted to turn you away, Sirius would kill me if he ever found out."

"I brought some of Sirius's things with me," Regulus continued quietly. "His boots...the Mötley t-shirt...and this." He pulled the photo album out of his pocket and slid it across the table to Remus. "This is how I knew he hadn't just run away from home. He would never leave this behind."

Remus gingerly took the album in his hands and flicked through it, his face softening. "Sirius took this everywhere with him."

"Exactly."

Remus sighed, and clutched the album to his chest. "I knew I should have looked into it sooner," he said. "I just assumed that your parents were keeping him from meeting me after your mother saw us holding hands when I walked him home the other week." It was Remus's turn to put his face in his hands. "I didn't think she would do something so awful."

"I know," Regulus murmured. "But like you said...what's done is done. Now we just need to work out how to get him out of there."

Remus nodded. "Yes. I know you're probably not going to agree with this, but…"

"What?"

"We need to call James."

…

James appeared on Remus's doorstep the following morning.

He looked as though he had just climbed out of bed and got dressed in the dark. His hair was sticking up at all angles, his glasses were lopsided, and he was still wearing a pyjama t-shirt, half-tucked into his jeans. Despite his bedraggled appearance, Regulus still felt his stomach flutter when he saw James in the doorway.

Regulus sat awkwardly at the table with a cup of black coffee, letting Remus talk to James and give him the entire tale. James glanced over at Regulus a few times, but Regulus kept his eyes on the dark liquid in his cup. He hadn't seen James for almost a year.

"Hi, Reg," James finally said after Remus was finished talking to him. He sat down across from Regulus. Regulus's heart swooped at hearing the nickname that only James ever called him, other than Sirius.

"Hi," Regulus murmured, still looking down at his cup.

"I'll give you guys some space," Remus whispered, and he hurried out of the kitchen before Regulus could stop him.

"Mind if I have some coffee?"

"There's still some in the pot." Regulus nodded to the counter, but James reached out for Regulus's cup instead. Regulus didn't miss the way their fingers grazed together as he took the cup, and drank a little, before passing it back to Regulus.

"Pretty crazy situation, right?" James said, and Regulus nodded slowly.

"Remus said you might have a way to help us get Sirius out," he replied. The air was getting tense, and he didn't want to be thinking about the butterflies that swooned in his stomach when James spoke or touched him. There were more important things to discuss.

James nodded. "Yes," he cleared his throat. "Lily's studying psychiatric medicine. She's in her final year now, and she does her placements at St. Mungo's quite frequently. If I speak to her...she might be able to help us get into the hospital to get him out. Or at least get us some information that could help."

Regulus swirled the remaining liquid around in his cup, trying to ignore the sinking feeling that was replacing the butterflies. "Oh, I remember. Your girlfriend."

James pressed his lips together and leaned closer to Regulus. "Don't make this awkward, Reg. You broke up with me, remember."

Regulus remembered all too well. He and James had been inseparable in high school, much to Sirius's distaste. Sirius and James were best friends, and he hadn't been happy when James had started a relationship with his younger brother. It had been a secret for the longest time, until shortly after Regulus graduated, a year after James and Sirius.

His mother had been the reason Regulus had to break off the relationship. That, and the fact that Regulus was utterly terrified of her wrath. He had heard the way she spoke about men that copulated with each other. Sirius didn't have the same fear, as he continued his relationship with Remus regardless of what might happen—and now he was facing the consequences.

Regulus drained his cup and placed it back down on the table. "Talk to your girlfriend, okay? This is about my brother." He stood up and stalked out of the room, heading towards the bathroom.

It hurt too much to look at James. It hurt too much to be reminded that he was still in love with him.

…

Lily Evans stood with her back to James. She had her arms folded as she looked out of the window, and her auburn hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail at the back of her head. She had just come home from a long day at university, and she was already angry with James for his request.

James was surprised. He thought that Lily would want to help him. She knew how close James and Sirius had been in school and knew what Sirius meant to him.

"Sirius Black," she murmured, not looking away from the window. "Is not in St. Mungo's. Don't be ridiculous, James."

"He is, Lily. It's true. Please—I just need you to get me some information when you're next on placement there. Or a key, or something."

Lily turned around so furiously that her ponytail whipped across her face. "Get you information?" she repeated, her green eyes flashing. "Get you a key? Have you gone insane? That's not how it works. Even if Black is in there, do you really think I'd risk my entire career to get him out? It's not a prison, James, it's a hospital. If he's in there, he's in there for a reason."

"Why don't you believe that he's in there?" James asked, suddenly incensed. "Why don't you want to help me? Why don't you want to help him?"

Lily threw her hands in the air. "That family has their fingers in every pie in London, James! If one of their sons was sent to a psychiatric hospital, everyone would know about it!"

"They are paying your boss to keep his presence a secret," James replied. "The administrator doesn't even know, and he's Abraxas Malfoy's son."

Lily scoffed. "That is an absolute load of rubbish. I suppose Regulus let you in on that conspiracy, did he?"

James didn't miss the way she sneered Regulus's name, and suddenly he understood a little more why she had such an attitude about trying to help him.

"This isn't about Sirius at all, is it?" He muttered. "This is because I told you that Regulus came to us with the news. What is it, Lily? Do you think this is some kind of elaborate lie so that I can—what, I don't know—go shack up with Regulus?"

Lily pursed her lips angrily. "This has nothing to do with Regulus," she said icily, but her tone said otherwise.

"This is not the time to be jealous of my ex, Lily—"

"If Sirius is in St. Mungo's," Lily continued, talking over James. "Then he's in there for a good reason. I remember what Sirius was like in school. He was...unhinged. Too excitable. He's probably just getting a little bit of help for his...unstable emotions."

James shook his head in disbelief. "He's probably getting abused in there because he's gay, and you're just letting it happen!"

"I wish you'd shut up!" snapped Lily. "That hospital hasn't treated patients for homosexuality since the sixties! It's a barbaric practice that St. Mungo's doesn't believe in!"

"I thought you were smart," James muttered. "You've heard the rumours. Surely you know what goes on behind closed doors, and when you and the other students aren't on placement."

"That's all it is, rumours," Lily replied scathingly. "I'm not going to jeopardize my entire future career and five years of studying on your ex-boyfriend's rumours. Not to mention what you're thinking about doing is a crime. I'm not going to be an accomplice to your crime!"

James stared at her unflinchingly for a few moments, as though he was suddenly seeing her in a new light. How could she be so cold? How could she just dismiss something that James was clearly so concerned about, and not want to help? He turned away from her and stormed into the bedroom.

She followed him after a minute, and watched him while he stomped around the bedroom, throwing items of clothes into a suitcase.

"What are you doing?" she sighed.

"What does it look like?" he snarled, not even looking up at Lily. "I'm leaving."

"You're leaving," Lily repeated blandly. "Fine. Leave. Run back to your ex, I don't care—"

"I'm leaving because you're not the woman I thought you were!" he yelled, his voice thundering across the bedroom so loud that Lily took a step back. "I thought you would understand. I thought you would want to help. If you needed help getting one of your friends out of a situation like this, I would do whatever it took in a heartbeat."

Lily folded her arms across her chest, but said nothing. James grabbed his suitcase and she stepped aside, letting him march out of the bedroom and out of the house. "I hope you know what you're doing. Don't come crawling back when he breaks your heart again," she muttered as he slammed the door behind him.

…

Less than an hour later, James turned up on Remus's doorstep and knocked on the door. Remus answered almost straight away, and he glanced at James's face, then down at the suitcase in his hand.

"I'm sorry, mate," James said, feeling his throat tighten with the threat of tears. "I didn't know where else to go."

Remus ushered James into the house and pulled him into a hug, and that was all it took for James to dissolve into tears.

"It's okay, buddy," Remus said soothingly. "You can stay here as long as you need."

"She didn't give a shit, Moony," James sobbed. "She didn't want to help me—it's like she doesn't care at all. I thought she was different."

"It's okay," Remus repeated softly. "You've got me. And Regulus," he added. "We're going to get Sirius out. I promise."

"James?" another voice said quietly, and James pulled away from Remus to look over at Regulus, who stood by the doorway. He must have just been in the shower, as his hair was wet and sticking to his face, and the dark pyjama t-shirt he was wearing was damp in a few patches. He was looking over at James with his wide grey eyes. They were no longer hard with the forced callousness he was trying to portray earlier on, and instead were full of concern.

It was like the last year that James and Regulus had been apart didn't even happen. James crossed the kitchen to Regulus, the tears streaming freely down his face. He threw his arms around Regulus's shoulders and buried his face into the top of his hair, crying softly. Regulus wrapped his arms around James's torso, pressing his cheek to his chest.

They didn't say anything. They didn't need to. Remus slipped out of the kitchen and Regulus heard the click of the front door lock, leaving James and Regulus alone. After holding each other quietly for some time, James sat down at the kitchen table, and Regulus started busying himself with making coffee. Remus came back into the room shortly after, holding two white carrier bags. "Fish and chips," he announced. "I figured we needed some comfort food."

James laughed bitterly, and stood up to get plates out of the cupboard while Remus unwrapped the bags. The three of them sat down together and ate quietly.

"I'm not sure where we'll go from here," Regulus finally said. "But I might have an idea."

"Well, we'll talk about it in the morning," Remus said. "Today has been...emotional, and tolling for all of us. We'll be no help to Sirius if we're exhausted and unable to formulate a good plan."

James nodded. "Yeah. We need a good night's sleep."

"Speaking of which," Remus suddenly looked slightly uncomfortable. "You know Regulus is sleeping in the guest room, James."

"I can sleep on the couch," Regulus interrupted. "I don't mind."

"It's a tiny two person couch," Remus said apologetically. "There's no way you can sleep on it. Sirius has always shared my bed, even before we were actually dating—"

"I don't need to know," Regulus replied, holding his hands up quickly. "It's fine. I'll sleep on the floor."

"Don't be stupid," James muttered. "We can share the guest bed, okay? It's not like we haven't done it before."

Regulus glanced warily at James. "Are you sure that's...okay?"

"It doesn't matter to me," James continued. "Either that, or I share with Remus—but I know what he and Sirius have got up to in that bed, so I really don't want to have to do that."

…

As he laid beside him in bed, Regulus was sure that James was of a particular breed of human that didn't feel awkwardness. Regulus was facing the wall—determined not to face James—and had scooted as far away from James as he could. All Regulus could think about was what James and Regulus had got up to the last time they shared a bed with each other. How was it that James didn't seem to be bothered by it?

"Will you calm down, Reg?" James's voice murmured into the dark, making Regulus jump. He thought James had fallen asleep. "I'm not going to molest you. You're going to fall into Moony's room if you squash yourself any closer to that wall."

Regulus rolled his eyes at the wall. "I just don't want to make you uncomfortable. It's a bit weird, isn't it?"

"It's just a bed in a room in a flat," James sighed. "It's just a place to sleep. Relax."

Regulus tried, but it still took him hours before he felt comfortable enough to drift off to sleep.

And when he woke up, he knew straight away that James had been wrong. It wasn't just a bed in a room in a flat, and it wasn't just a place to sleep. If it was any of those things, Regulus wouldn't have woken up with his head nestled on James's chest, and James wouldn't have his arm slung over Regulus, as though no time had passed since they broke up.

…

The next morning, Regulus didn't even wait for Remus to finish pouring coffee before he started talking.

"So, the Malfoys are close with my parents," he announced. "Lucius Malfoy used to come over to our house a lot. We weren't really friends...I suppose we were acquaintances."

"You never told me you were friends with that pranny," James said with a snort.

"Acquaintances," repeated Regulus, glaring at James. "Anyway. Lucius works as an administrator at the hospital, for Abraxas, who is the chairman and owner of the hospital."

"How is this going to get us into St. Mungo's?" Remus quipped.

"I'm going to arrange an interview with Lucius. If Mother has really paid Abraxas enough to keep quiet, then Lucius has no idea that Sirius is locked up in there—he's probably been admitted under a false name—so there's no way that it will be suspect for me to visit the hospital," Regulus continued. "I've read about St. Mungo's before. The building was built before the first world war as a Sanitarium, and then it was used as a military hospital. I'm going to tell him I'm writing a report on the architecture for my university assignment. I'll take a camera in, and if all goes well, I'll be able to get some pictures of the inside."

"You'll be able to find out the best entrances and exits," James murmured. "Smart."

"Then we'll just have to find a way to get into the hospital at a later date, and undercover."

"I may have an answer for that," Remus said, passing Regulus a cup of fresh coffee. "I rang Frank last night."

"Longbottom?" James asked, and Remus nodded.

"I met him in the pub a few weeks ago and he was telling me about his job in the food industry," Remus explained. "I remember him telling me that they deliver bulk ingredients to hospitals and care homes. I asked him if he knew anyone who delivers to St. Mungo's, and it turns out it's one of his regular routes."

"He goes there?" James leaned forward in his seat.

Remus nodded. "Once a week, actually. I told him about Sirius—about his mum throwing him in there, and he really wants to help us. He's going to come by later on and have a chat with us."

Regulus smiled at Remus and James, sighing in relief. "Great. This is great. We're getting somewhere."

"Get in touch with Malfoy," Remus said. "And James and I will have a chat with Frank. We will do this."

...

It was much easier to set up a meeting with Lucius Malfoy than Regulus expected. As he dialled the number for St. Mungo's Hospital from the telephone book, Regulus had been prepared for some resistance from the secretive hospital—but it seemed Lucius was just as vain as ever, and only too happy to show off about his career.

"Lucius Malfoy," his voice spoke smoothly through the receiver, after the receptionist wired Regulus through. "St. Mungo's Administration."

"Lucius," Regulus greeted quickly. "It's Regulus—Regulus Black."

"Ah, Regulus…" Lucius's voice gained a slight lilt. "How nice to hear from you. I haven't seen you since...well, it must be…"

"Since you married my dear cousin," Regulus replied. "I've been busy with my studies, and haven't had a chance to stay in touch with the extended family."

"What gives you cause to call me here today, Regulus?" Lucius continued breezily, and Regulus coiled the phone cord around his finger as he braced himself for his request. If he didn't get it right, it could ruin the whole operation.

"I have an assignment due next month," Regulus started carefully. "I'm interested in the architecture of St. Mungo's. I wondered if I could arrange a meeting with you to get some information about the building for my essay? Perhaps a couple of pictures?"

There was a pause while Lucius seemed to consider his options. Regulus held his breath as he waited.

"Of course," Lucius finally said. "I'd be only too happy to have an interview with you. Our families have been friends for such a long time, after all."

"Thank you," Regulus breathed. "Only, could you do me a favour? I told Mother and Father that I had already completed this assignment, but I left it until the last minute—I know, I know. Could you keep it quiet from your father that I'm coming to your hospital? If the news gets back to Mother, she will surely know that I haven't yet finished the essay, and I'll never hear the end of it." Regulus paused. "I'll owe you big time."

There was a haughty laugh from the other end of the telephone. "Understood," Lucius chuckled. "Come to St. Mungo's tomorrow for ten-thirty, and tell the receptionist you have an appointment with me. Father has business in Devon, so he won't be around for the next few days. Your secret will be safe with me."

After Regulus put the telephone down, he walked into the kitchen where James and Remus were sitting at the table. "It's done," he announced, and rubbed his forehead with the palm of his hand. "I have a meeting with Malfoy tomorrow."

"That's quicker than I expected," Remus said.

"It was easier than I expected," added Regulus, taking a seat at the table.

James sniggered and shook his head. "I knew it would be easy. That prat and his family were always sucking up to anyone with more influence than them. Your family is probably the only one in London more powerful than the Malfoys, so he'll be like putty in your hands."

Regulus didn't reply, and instead turned back to Remus. "Have you spoken to Frank yet?"

"He's coming by soon," Remus replied, and there was a sudden knock at the door. "That'll be him now." He stood up from the table to answer the door.

Much to everyone's surprise, it wasn't Frank Longbottom on the other side of the door. A familiar red-headed woman stood, glaring into the house, clutching an enormous bin bag and a suitcase.

"Lily," James said suddenly, standing up from the table. She looked over at him, and her eyes settled on Regulus. Her lip curled, and Regulus realised what a terrible time it was to be sitting anywhere near James.

"You look comfortable," she muttered, and threw the bin bag onto the floor, followed by the suitcase. "I packed the rest of your things for you. I figured you'd need them now that you're shacking up with your ex again."

"Lily!" James repeated, and he moved towards the door, kicking the suitcase and the black bag out of the way. "What do you think you're playing at?"

Remus backed away from the door and made eye contact with Regulus, jerking his head towards the living room door. Regulus understood and he left the kitchen with Remus, closing the door behind them. Lily and James erupted into a loud argument, which culminated quickly with the front door banging shut. James walked sheepishly into the living room shortly after.

"I'm so sorry about that, Moony," he said, scratching the back of his head. "I didn't think she'd show up at your door, carrying on like that."

"It's all good," Remus replied. "Are you okay?"

Regulus glanced at James. He wasn't crying this time, which Regulus figured was a good thing, but his face was showing signs of strain. Remus looked slightly embarrassed, and suddenly Regulus was the one who felt his throat constricting, as though he wanted to cry.

"I'm sorry, James," he murmured suddenly, hating the way his voice cracked. "And you, Remus. This is my fault. I shouldn't have got you involved with this."

James furrowed his brow and sat on the arm of the couch next to Regulus. "What are you talking about, idiot?"

Remus shook his head. "I can't believe you, Regulus. You shouldn't have got us involved with this? Of course you should—Sirius is the love of my life, and James's best friend! We deserve to be involved in this. Sirius needs all of us right now."

"I know, but…" Regulus put his face in his hands. "I didn't mean for Lily and James to break up over this."

James reached out and ran his hand across Regulus's hair, and Regulus felt something flutter in his chest at the soft touch. "That's not on you, Reg." He pulled the hand away as quickly as he reached out, and Regulus tried not to feel disappointed. "Lily could have helped us, but she's let her feelings get in the way of doing the right thing. That's on her."

"James…" Remus started. "You know Lily better than anyone. Do you think...do you think she'll keep it to herself? I know she doesn't know any of the details, but she'll know what we're planning to do."

Regulus looked up at James quizzically. He rubbed the bridge of his nose with his thumb and finger while he thought. "A week ago, I'd probably have said that she wouldn't tell anyone. But I'd have also told you that she'd help me break Sirius out of there in a heartbeat, so to be honest, I don't think I know her as well as I thought I did."

The three of them were quiet for a long moment, until Regulus leaned forwards, his elbows resting on his knees. "It's okay. We just need to get things into motion before she gets a chance to go to her boss, or the authorities—if that's what she's planning to do, anyway."

…

Frank Longbottom was only too eager to help with their heist. In fact, he came fully prepared—much to Remus's surprise.

"Sirius was always good to me in high school," Frank explained, as he pulled some white clothing out of his rucksack, while James, Regulus and Remus looked on with interest. "He got me out of a few sticky spots. So there's no way I was going to pass up on helping him out, even if he has gone a bit loony."

Remus noticed Regulus ball his fists where they rested on his thighs. "He's not gone loony," Regulus muttered. "My mother did this."

Frank looked a little bit sheepish. "Sorry, mate. I didn't mean it like that."

"So, how do you think you can help us?" Remus asked quickly.

Frank tossed Remus the clothes—a plain white pair of trousers and a matching t-shirt with a yellow logo on the breast; a simple picture of a corn on the cob. "This is a spare uniform, and I already got my mate in admin to make a fake ID." He fished around in his rucksack and pulled out a lanyard with a laminated card attached to the end. It had a very old picture of Remus on it, and titled him as 'Romulus Lambert'.

"Is that my college picture?" Remus asked, squinting at the picture. Frank laughed and nodded.

"Sorry, that's all I had, and I was in a rush." He chucked the lanyard over to Remus.

"This is all well and good," Regulus interrupted. "But what does dressing Remus up as a delivery boy have to do with breaking my brother out of that place?"

"Patience," Frank replied. "My route goes into St. Mungo's on Tuesdays. You're going to replace my partner—he already knows about all of this—and we'll get you into the hospital when we take the goods through the delivery entrance to the kitchens."

"Frank, did you bring more uniforms?" asked James. "Or did you only plan on getting Remus in?"

"This is where things are going to get tricky," Frank continued. "We take a refrigerated food cart through the hospital. You two," Frank gestured between James and Regulus. "Are going to be smuggled in, squashed together inside the cart. It'll be cold and uncomfortable for about ten minutes while we move through the hospital."

Remus glanced at James and Regulus, who were both blinking at each other. "That's the only way?" Regulus finally said.

Frank nodded. "They're pretty stringent about who comes in and who leaves the hospital."

"So how do we get Sirius out, if they're going to be checking who's coming in and out?" James asked, threading his fingers together across his lap.

Frank had the answer for that, too. "It usually takes two trips to get all the produce into the hospital," he explained. "So you will need to be quick to find him. Get him back to the kitchen and hide him in the cart, then we'll take him back to the van. Then we come back into the hospital under the guise of bringing in the next lot of food, and get James and Regulus out."

James nodded in agreement. "This all seems like it'll work. You've come up with a good plan, Frankie." He leaned over the couch to slap Frank on the back.

Remus wasn't so sure, and Regulus was biting his lip nervously.

But it was the only plan they had and time was of the essence.

…

"Do you want a lift to St. Mungo's in the morning?" James asked Regulus late in the night, after they had all ventured off to bed. Regulus was facing the wall again, even more determined not to make James uncomfortable after his untimely row with Lily earlier in the day.

"What do you mean?" Regulus murmured. "You don't have a car, do you?"

James scoffed. "No, you know I failed my test three times. Sirius's motorbike is around the back. He'd been hiding it here away from your mum."

Regulus rolled onto his back and looked up at the dark ceiling. "She did hate that thing. She threatened to wrap it around his neck if anyone ever recognised him when he was riding it."

James chuckled.

"Can you even ride that thing?"

"Would I offer to give you a lift on it if I couldn't ride it?" James asked. "Actually, don't answer that. But yes, I can ride it."

"I don't know."

"Well, you can get the bus if you like. Or walk across London."

Regulus rolled his eyes. "No, it's fine. Yes, I'll have the lift." He paused, and glanced alongside him at James, where he could see his eyes glittering through the dark. "Thank you, James."

…

Regulus regretted agreeing to the lift as soon as he climbed on the back of the motorbike.

He'd never ridden it before, even though Sirius had offered hundreds of times to take Regulus out on it. As far as Regulus was concerned, it was a roaring death trap and he wouldn't dream of risking his life by sitting on the back of it.

Well, he'd been sure about that until it was James that asked him if he wanted a ride on it. He sat awkwardly behind James, suddenly aware of how intimate it was to be cramped on the back of the vehicle with another person. "You're going to have to hold onto me," James said softly. "Unless you want to fly off the back."

Regulus gingerly placed his hand on James's waist, assuring himself that it was just for safety reasons. When James kicked the engine into life, Regulus shrieked and threw his arms tightly around James's waist, burying his face into the back of his leather jacket.

James laughed, and Regulus didn't dare look while they rode to St. Mungo's.

…

Lucius Malfoy was every bit as narcissistic and big-headed as he had been the last time Regulus had seen him. He was waiting in reception for Regulus, even though he'd given the instruction for Regulus to ask the receptionist for him, and he was wearing a sharp black suit and holding an actual cane, even though he wasn't even thirty yet. It was definitely for vanity reasons, Regulus surmised.

"Regulus," he drawled, holding out his arms in greeting. Regulus noticed that the cane had a silver snake's head on the handle, and he resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Wonderful to see you."

"Lucius, thank you for visiting with me."

"It's my pleasure," simpered Lucius sickeningly. "Please, follow me."

Regulus allowed Lucius to lead him through the doors away from reception, and tried his best to concentrate on Lucius's running commentary—but it was suddenly very hard to focus. As they walked through the narrow corridors, where doors branched off to day rooms and wards and dining halls, all Regulus could think about was Sirius.

Was he sitting in one of those rooms, sedated and staring into space? Or was he locked in some dungeon, chained to the wall and dwelling in his own filth? Regulus highly expected that it was the latter, due to the knowledge of his mother paying out Abraxas to hide Sirius away.

Lucius led Regulus up an enormous, ornate stairway, with a gigantic chandelier dripping with crystals into the foyer below. He must have noticed Regulus staring, as he curled his lips in a smug smile. "Grandfather commissioned a French glassworker to sculpt each and every crystal on that chandelier. Feel free to take a picture."

"Uh...a picture?" Regulus murmured, furrowing his brow. He was too busy wondering what such an obnoxious light fitting would be doing in a hospital.

Lucius frowned. "For your essay. You mentioned wanting some pictures."

"Oh!" Regulus swung his rucksack around and fished inside it for his camera. "Of course. Yes, sorry. I was...mesmerized by the artistry."

Bringing the conversation back around to the chandelier was convincing enough for Lucius, and he stood by with his chest puffed out while Regulus rolled the dial on his camera and snapped a picture.

"The pillars are made from original Parisian marble, shipped directly over in eighteen-thirty-two," Lucius continued as they walked further up the stairs. He gestured to the huge pillars that held up the foundations of the huge building.

"Intriguing," Regulus lied, as they stopped outside a room with a colourful glass door.

"This is original art deco glass from the church that used to be on site back when the hospital was a sanitarium," Lucius bragged. "Father had it installed in my office as a birthday present on my twenty-seventh."

"Wonderful," Regulus murmured.

He'd only been with Lucius Malfoy for ten minutes, and he already wanted to throw himself over the bannister of the stairway.

…

"What if something's gone wrong?"

"James, you need to calm down."

"He was supposed to be two hours, tops. I was waiting for him for five hours and he never showed up. It's nearly nine now!"

Remus sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "James, Regulus is an adult."

"I'm allowed to worry about him, aren't I?" James snapped. When Remus gave him an odd look, he pursed his lips. "I mean, if something has happened to him in there or he's been caught out, it could ruin our entire operation to rescue Sirius."

"Are you sure that's all you're concerned about?" Remus asked with a raised eyebrow.

Just as James was trying to formulate a reply, the front door was pushed open. James jumped up from the couch and rushed to the kitchen, where Regulus was standing on the doormat, soaked through from the rain that was pouring outside. He glanced awkwardly at James, then ran his fingers through his wet hair.

"Sorry," he said quietly. "I know you were going to pick me back up. It was kind of hard to get away from Malfoy."

James stomped across the kitchen and dragged Regulus into the house by the arm, and slammed the door shut behind him. "Where were you?" Before he even realised what he was doing, he had pulled Regulus into a hug. Regulus stood stiffly with his face against James's chest, his arms hanging by his sides. James released him after a few seconds and stepped back, blinking down at Regulus. "Sorry," he murmured, feeling his face begin to burn with embarrassment.

"It's okay," Regulus replied quietly. He seemed to find it difficult to make eye contact with James all of a sudden, and his pale face was flushed.

"James was very concerned that the operation might have been ruined," Remus said. James looked around and saw him leaning against the doorframe, the shadow of a grin on his face. He glared at his friend.

"Sit down," James grumbled, pulling the chairs out from the kitchen table and taking a seat. Remus and Regulus followed, and Regulus rubbed his hands together. The tips of his fingers were bright pink. James had a sudden desire to take Regulus's hands in his to warm them up. "So, what did you find out?"

"Aside from Malfoy giving me the entire history of each prestigious brick that was placed on that sacred ground?" Regulus muttered scathingly. "Quite a lot, actually."

Regulus started to detail his meeting with Lucius. Apparently, he'd spent several hours in Lucius's office, listening to him describe the quality of the mahogany desk and the origin of the oil painting on his wall. Regulus had finally managed to get the conversation in the direction of the actual patients, and Lucius had been unprofessional and loose-lipped enough to share some details about the patients that had passed through the doors recently—in particular an unnamed, shady character who had been admitted straight to the basement ward, and was never released from his cell to visit the day rooms like the other patients were.

"It has to be Sirius," Regulus said. "Who else would it be? It's the only person in the whole hospital who Lucius doesn't know a thing about, and I could tell he wasn't happy about that. He did not like to be reminded that there was something he was in the dark about."

"So, what do we know?" James asked, leaning back in his chair and putting his arms behind his head.

"We know where Sirius is in the building," Regulus confirmed. "Malfoy let me take an unsupervised walk around the hospital's communal areas—he thought I was taking pictures of the architecture. I could only find one stairway that led downwards, and it's by the kitchens."

"That's handy," Remus said. "We'll be in the kitchen after Frank smuggles us in. At least we won't have too far to move through the hospital."

"So long as we don't have too far to go once we're down the stairs," Regulus added. "I could get down the stairs of the basement, but there was a locked door at the bottom that I couldn't get past, so I have no idea how much further we will have to venture once we're in the basement."

James deflated in his seat, and Remus appeared to do the same. "How are we going to get into the basement then, if it's locked?" James asked.

He was quite surprised when Regulus suddenly smirked, and unfolded his arms to dig into his pocket. He pulled out a blue lanyard with a key card on the end of the strap. "In one of the communal spaces, there was a nurse sleeping on a daybed. I stole this out of her bag." Regulus dropped it on the table. "I did wonder if it would be noticed that such an important item has gone missing, but I figured that seeing as she was sleeping on the job, she probably won't be too eager to admit her mistake."

James and Remus blinked at Regulus for a moment, and then James reached out and wrapped an arm around Regulus's neck, using the other hand to scruff up his hair. "You little shit," he exclaimed with a laugh, and he sat back. Regulus tried to smooth his wet hair back out, scowling at James. "You stole something? What's gotten into you over the last year?"

Regulus pursed his lips. "I had to do something."

"Well, I'm impressed," James grinned, and Regulus's scowl faded and he smiled shyly down at his hands.

For a moment, James felt that he could reach over and hold Regulus again, like he had done not ten minutes ago, when he'd forgotten for a moment that they had been split up for a year and James hadn't been involved with another person.

The tension in the air was broken by Remus clearing his throat. "Well, we have two days until Tuesday," he said. "There's nothing we can really do until then except wait and prepare."

…

The rain was hammering the window during the night while Regulus tried to pretend he was asleep. He knew that James was lying awake beside him.

Regulus hadn't been able to stop thinking about the moment he walked back through the door of Remus's flat after his long day at the asylum with Lucius. He'd seen the panic in James's eyes when he rushed into the kitchen. He heard the hysteria in his voice when he demanded to know where Regulus had been. He'd felt his heartbeat fluttering in his chest like a quivering bird.

He hadn't realised that James still felt anything like that for him.

"I know you're awake," James suddenly said. "Do you ever get bored of lying and facing that wall?"

After a few moments, Regulus succumbed, and rolled over to face James. "The rain is loud, that's all."

"That's not what I asked."

Regulus didn't say anything.

"What are you thinking about over there?" James asked. He shuffled slightly closer to Regulus, until he was almost resting his head on Regulus's pillow. "I can practically hear your brain whirring."

"Nothing."

"Don't lie."

Regulus huffed. "Fine," he murmured. What harm would telling him really do? "I thought…"

"You thought?"

"I thought you'd moved on," Regulus continued. "After we split up. I thought you'd moved on, seeing as you started going out with Lily."

James was quiet for so long that Regulus wondered if he'd actually fallen asleep, but then he finally sighed. "You were always number one, Reg."

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean." James's hand moved under the covers, until he found Regulus's. Regulus allowed him to entwine their fingers together, and closed his eyes for a minute, enjoying the warmth that emanated from James's palm. "Lily was...I suppose she started as a rebound. Then she just became...comfortable. I could see myself settling down with her, getting married, having kids, doing all that stuff that is normal and expected of me, but she wasn't…" James paused. "She wasn't you, Regulus. No one would ever come close."

Regulus felt his eyes prickling.

"I had to start a relationship with someone after you left me or I'd have gone crazy," James continued. "I needed to feel something."

"I've ruined that for you now," Regulus whispered.

James moved closer still, until Regulus could feel James's breath on his lips. "I don't know if that's how I'd describe it." James's hand released Regulus's, and slid around his waist to press into the small of his back, pulling him closer. "Do you want me to stop?" he whispered, his breath ghosting Regulus's lips.

Regulus's bottom lip quivered as he tried to think of any reason to stop, but his mind was clouded. He wrapped his arms around James's neck and kissed him.

…

Remus noticed the difference between James and Regulus straight away, despite their terrible job at hiding it.

They were even more awkward around each other than normal, which was already a difficult feat to achieve. They barely made eye contact with each other during the day, and if they did, one of them would start blushing so hard that Remus idly wondered if he would be able to fry an egg on their burning skin. They wouldn't sit next to each other on the couch or at the kitchen table, as though they were fearful of touching one another. They were like a couple of schoolgirls.

But despite their awkwardness throughout the day, Remus noticed they were slipping off to bed earlier and earlier. If he hadn't been mistaken, he'd heard a suspicious rhythmic thumping during the night that sounded a lot like the headboard banging against the wall.

He waited until Regulus had sloped off one day to buy coffee to bring it up with James.

"What's going on there, mate?" he asked casually, sitting on the arm of the small couch. James glanced up at Remus, his face almost instantly flushing pink.

"What? Nothing."

Remus sighed and shook his head. "I'm not...I'm not telling you what you should or shouldn't do, Prongs. But do you really think right now is a good time to start reigniting your old relationship? You've just split from Lily in a massively dramatic fashion. You were in tears over her attitude just the other day. And we're in the middle of preparing to break your best mate out of a lunatic asylum."

"I think Malfoy likes to call it a psychiatric institution for the clinically insane," James replied.

Remus rolled his eyes. "So you don't deny it, then?"

James took off his glasses and rubbed them on the hem of his t-shirt. "It's...it's complicated, okay?"

"I can see that."

"Just leave it, Moony," James replied with a groan. "I don't understand it anymore than you do."

…

Before they knew it, Tuesday had rolled around. They had to wake up at three in the morning, as Frank's delivery was at four. Regulus shook James awake, and James batted him away. "Nngh...go away, Mum. I already put my whites in the basket yesterday."

"As much as I'd love to go through your dirty underwear with you," Regulus said. "We need to get up. Today's the day."

James's eyes fluttered open, and he reached groggily for his glasses. "Shit, yeah."

They stumbled out of bed and dressed in the dark, shrugging on matching black leggings and long-sleeved shirts that Remus had dug out of the wardrobe for them. When they came into the living room, Remus was already waiting, fastening the Romulus Lambert ID to the front of his white uniform polo shirt.

The three of them looked at each other for a moment. "Your disguise is great, Moony," James said with a grin. "Padfoot is going to be all over you while you're dressed as a delivery boy. Frank, do you reckon he can keep the outfit after we've broken Sirius out?"

Remus looked at James sternly. "No messing about now, guys," he turned his attention to Regulus, too. "I know things are...weird between you two right now. But today, this is all about Sirius. We get in there, we get him out. Then..." he flapped his hand between James and Regulus. "...you can sort your thing out. Whatever it is."

Even though Regulus had a sudden urge to argue that he was only bothered about Sirius right now, and there was no 'thing'between him and James, he bit his tongue. Now wasn't the time for squabbling. They had to focus right now, and being reminded of the heady feelings that were simmering between him and James would not help them get Sirius out safely.

It was easy enough to convince himself that he could push it all out of his mind while they waited for Frank. It was easy enough while they rode in the delivery van to the other side of London, making idle small talk with Frank during the drive. It became a lot more difficult when Frank opened the chest refrigerator that was atop the cart, and motioned for James and Regulus to climb in.

"We haven't got time for this," Remus said quietly, as Regulus and James blinked at the cart. "Just get in."

James started into action first. He climbed into the refrigerator and sat down in the narrow cavity, sliding himself down so he was slouched, almost lying down. Regulus put his hands on the cool metal frame of the refrigerator, looking around for the slightest bit of space he could squeeze himself into. There wasn't any. James only just fit into it, his lanky frame crumpled awkwardly.

Regulus heard Remus sigh impatiently. "Regulus, you've been sharing a bed with James for the whole time you've been staying at my house," he said sharply. "And I know you haven't been sleeping at opposite ends of the bed. Now get into the cart. It's high time we saved my boyfriend."

Regulus swallowed his apprehension and nodded. He climbed into the cart and sat between James's legs, trying not to recall the similar position he'd been in just the night before. James pulled him back against his chest as Remus slammed the refrigerator shut. They didn't lapse completely into darkness, however—there was a crack of light shining through a gap in the lid.

"I've stuck a bit of wood under the lid," Regulus heard Frank explain. "You'd run out of oxygen quickly otherwise. It's still going to be pretty uncomfortable in there—it'll take ten minutes or slightly longer to get into the kitchen, and that's if we don't run into any issues beforehand."

"Are you guys okay in there?" Remus called.

"Yep," said James.

"Mmhmm," mumbled Regulus.

"Great."

There was a sudden lurch of the cart, and Regulus grabbed onto James's thighs in shock. James still had his arms around Regulus's chest, and Regulus's head was under James's chin. "It's okay," James muttered. "Don't start panicking, or we will run out of breath."

"I'm not panicking," Regulus said, rolling his eyes.

To Regulus's surprise, James pressed a light kiss to the top of Regulus's hair. He wondered if James was feeling as brave as he did during their recent nights together, as they were trapped in the near darkness of the cart. "It's going to be okay," he confirmed.

Regulus reached up and put his hands over James's. "Yeah," he replied softly, nodding. "It's going to be fine."

There was the sound of someone's fist connecting with the lid of the refrigerator, and both James and Regulus flinched. "When you've finished bonding in there," Remus shouted. "We're about to reach the doors, so you're going to have to be quiet."

...

"I'll do the talking," Frank murmured as he and Remus reached the delivery entrance, both standing behind the heavy cart. Remus nodded.

The orderly who stood at the door looked bored as he puffed on a cigarette. He held up his hand as Remus and Frank approached, and Frank flashed his ID badge. Remus quickly followed suit and did the same.

"Is this a new boy, Frankie?" the orderly asked curiously, looking Remus up and down. Remus felt his stomach flutter with a sudden onslaught of nerves.

Frank nodded. "Rom came in just last week, from the agency."

The orderly rolled his eyes. "And you didn't want to get a job in this place? We're desperate for staff. You told me you'd persuade the next new starter to take an interview for a position here," he complained.

Frank bared his teeth in an apologetic grin. "Sorry, Antonin," he said. "Rom's from Italy. English isn't his first language, so he needs a background job." Frank reached over the cart to give Remus a friendly slap on the back. "Perfect for pushing these carts around, eh Romulus?"

Remus painted what he hoped was a gormless expression on his face and smiled blankly at Frank and Antonin.

Antonin sighed heavily. "Well, you better make good on your promise next time, Frankie. I'm on my fifth twelve hour shift right now because we lost three more orderlies last week."

"I promise, mate. You here all day?"

"Until four," Antonin muttered. "So you better have something good for lunch in that fridge." He nodded to the cart.

"Mostly soup and bread," Frank replied. "But I think there's pre-cooked stews in there, too. It's going to be a two-trip job today."

"Yeah, whatever." Antonin pushed the bar on the delivery door to unlock it, and propped it open, allowing Frank and Remus to start moving the cart down the narrow hallway within.

The door swung closed behind them, and Remus suddenly felt awfully trapped. "How do we get back out?" he whispered to Frank as they ventured down the corridor.

"There's a buzzer on the door," Frank explained quietly. "He can't leave it open for...obvious reasons. Patients might escape. I have to confirm that it's me coming back out and he lets me out."

"Okay," Remus murmured, trying to settle the anxiety that was knotting in his stomach.

The walk through the corridor did only take ten minutes, but it felt longer. He wanted to rush through with the cart as fast as he could, but Frank kept stilling the cart. "We can't go speeding through, mate," he muttered as they walked. "This is sensitive. It has to look as normal as possible. I saunter when I do this normally. I never rush."

"There's no one around," Remus replied quietly.

"You'd be surprised how quickly people appear in these halls."

They reached a steel door on the far wall, and Frank used his lanyard to swipe a card slot in the door. "Perks of being the delivery boy," he muttered. "Kitchen staff don't get in until seven, so they had to give us access to the kitchen unless they wanted to start paying their own staff to come in earlier."

Frank propped the door open and they pushed the cart through. Once they were inside, Frank flipped on the lights, checked around to make sure they were definitely alone, and pulled the lid of the refrigerator open.

James had his arms locked around Regulus's torso, and they were both shivering. They started scrambling to get out quickly, gasping for breath and rubbing their arms furiously. "Fuck, that was cold," James muttered.

"Freezing," Regulus confirmed. "Where are we?"

"Kitchen," Remus said. "You remember how to get to the basement from here?" Regulus nodded. "Okay. Let's make a move."

"Easy, tiger," Frank grabbed Remus's shoulder. "You can't go darting off dressed like a delivery boy. You'll be spotted straight away. James and Regulus are dressed for the occasion."

Remus stared at Frank, exasperated. "What do you mean?" he demanded to know. "I have to go with them."

Frank shook his head. "No, you need to help me clean up the mess we just made, so we have an excuse as to why we are in here longer."

James, Regulus and Remus blinked at Frank. "Mess?" Remus asked.

Frank grinned and walked over to the standing chest fridge-freezers that were pushed up against the far wall. He opened it and reached inside for a huge stew pot that was covered with a lid, and he instantly dropped it on the floor. The other three jumped back in horror as a disgusting, congealed brown sludge spread across the tiles.

"Ugh," James wrinkled his nose.

"What is that?" Regulus asked.

"Whatever it is, your poor brother will probably have had a lovely serving of it over the weekend," Frank said. "Anyway, Remus—you and I need to clean this up. That'll give James and Regulus enough time to squirrel Sirius away."

Remus looked back at James and Regulus, his eyes filled with panic.

"Don't worry, mate," James said. "We can do this."

Regulus nodded in confirmation. "We'll get him out."

…

Regulus started to lead James down the hallway outside of the kitchen, clinging to the walls and the shadows. He started to wish instantly that he was performing the heist on his own, because James Potter was not a good sneak.

He was aware of every noise that James was making. He couldn't stick to the wall like Regulus was. He couldn't walk silently—he was heavy-footed and Regulus was sure that everyone within a five mile radius would be able to hear his deafening footsteps. Also, Regulus had become suddenly aware that James breathed ridiculously loudly. How was someone able to make so much noise just whilst breathing?

Regardless, Regulus forced himself to stay calm and continue moving through the hospital, hoping for the best that no one would cross their path. It was lucky that they were in the hospital so early—Regulus presumed that there would only be skeleton staff working, and if they were anything like the nurse that he had pilfered the keycard from, they wouldn't be working very hard.

They reached the stairs to the basement, and started to tip-toe down. "If this is as protected as Malfoy made out, then there might be more staff inside," Regulus muttered as he pulled the keycard out of his pocket. "Are you ready?"

James nodded.

Regulus swiped the keycard and pushed open the door.

…

Sirius Black was utterly miserable.

He hadn't seen the light of day in the longest time. He'd long since forgotten how many days it had been since he'd been incarcerated in the hospital. The days and night merged into one and he had no idea of the concept of time anymore. When he'd first been brought into the dingy cell below the hospital, he'd tried to keep track of the hours, but then they'd started to medicate him, and things had become blurry.

He barely even saw any other humans. An orderly came by every now and then to push some gruel through the flap in the door. Rarer still, he would be shackled and taken to a bright white bathroom where the silent nurse would strip him naked and scrub him down with a rough sponge and clinical soap, and then force him into clean linens. They wouldn't stay clean for long, as his living quarters weren't cleaned regularly, and he was expected to use a chamber pot in place of a normal toilet.

Sometimes a different man would come and collect him—a sharp faced person with a bright white coat and slicked back hair. He called himself Doctor Riddle, and he was going to cure Sirius. Sirius didn't know what he was being cured of, but the treatment was truly awful. He was taken to a dark room with a projector and a white screen, and the doctor would insert a cannula into his arm and wire him up to a drip with a liquid that made Sirius sick.

He would then throw up images onto the projector. Images of men kissing, men holding each other, graphic images of men in the throes of passion. Worst of all, Doctor Riddle somehow had pictures of Remus, though they were just ordinary pictures of him laughing, smiling, or staring off into the distance. Regardless, they still filled Sirius with longing.

The doctor would control a dial on the tube to send the medicine into Sirius's vein, whenever he thought Sirius was becoming aroused by an image on the screen. Within minutes, Sirius would be overcome with the urge to be sick, and would have to vomit into the bucket provided.

The process was supposed to train Sirius to associate the erotic images—and therefore his inclination towards men—with being sick, and he would then stop having a sexual interest in men. It was ridiculous, it was unfathomable, it was stupid.

But Sirius only ever mentioned it once. When he had refused to allow Riddle to wire him up to the drip, the doctor had very calmly told him that he could comply with the treatment, or be lobotomised.

For the longest time, Sirius had cried and cried while he was alone in his cell. He thought desperately of everyone he loved. James and Peter, his friends. Even Regulus, his little brother. Despite the fact that Regulus and Sirius didn't get on with each other half of the time, Sirius still loved him wholeheartedly, and hated the thought of him being out there in the world alone, having to deal with their parents all by himself.

Maybe most of all Sirius missed Remus. He longed to be in his boyfriend's arms again, and to be holding him. To be safe in Remus's warm flat, with it's cosy interior that was so different from the cold domesticity of Grimmauld Place. Not long before Sirius had been dragged out of his bed and admitted to the asylum, Remus had shyly asked Sirius if he wanted to move in with him. Sirius had wanted to, so bad, but the only thing stopping him was Regulus.

He was so afraid of leaving Regulus in that house alone with them, and there was no way that Regulus would leave without good reason. He was far too terrified of Walburga to stray from her.

After some time, Sirius seemed to run out of tears. Even though he wanted to cry so badly and his throat ached with a lump that never seemed to leave, he had nothing left to cry. He started to feel almost empty, choosing only to focus on the daydreams and thoughts of his friends and loved ones outside of the hospital.

"Sirius?"

Sirius kept his eyes closed. It wasn't the first time he'd heard the voice of one of his friends or family while he'd been in here. He was ravenous with hunger, and his brain had long since stopped trying to fight off the hallucinations.

"Sirius, is that you?"

Sirius blinked groggily. He'd been trying to focus on recalling his first date with Remus—they'd been to a rooftop bar in the city, and Remus had been so adorable and clumsy. Even though they'd been friends for years, he was suddenly nervous about breaching their relationship into something romantic, and he'd spilled white wine all over Sirius's lap. Sirius had laughed until his ribs hurt when Remus jumped over and started trying to pat away the wine with a napkin, until he realised how inappropriate it must have looked to the other patrons.

After the date they'd kissed under the fairy lights. It was one of the happiest moments in Sirius's life.

"Padfoot!"

Sirius's eyes flew open, and he cursed the spectre of James for ruining one of the few memories that was giving him warmth. "Go away, Prongs. I'm not in the mood right now."

"He thinks he's hallucinating you," another voice. Sirius furrowed his brow, suddenly distracted from his daydream. Was that Regulus?

"Open the door."

"Working on it."

There was a familiar beeping, and Sirius sat up a little straighter on his flat mattress, peering at the dark window of the steel door. He couldn't see the figures that were on the other side, but he knew they couldn't be there for any good reason. No one that had visited him in his cell had come with good intentions.

The door swung open. James and Regulus stood on the other side, staring into the dingy room. Sirius cowered on his bed, putting his arms over his face. "Leave me alone. I don't want to go. I don't want to throw up again, my stomach is raw."

"Sirius," Regulus's voice was barely a whisper, and he moved closer. Sirius screamed and flattened himself against the wall. "Sirius, it's okay! It's us! It's Regulus. James is here, too."

"You're not real!" Sirius shrieked.

Regulus grabbed Sirius's hand and pressed his palm flat to his chest. "I'm real," he said, his dark eyes flickering across Sirius's face. "I'm real. Listen. Concentrate."

Sirius took a few shallow breaths as he stared into Regulus's pale, ghostly face. Regulus's chest was warm under his hand, and he could feel his heart beating frantically.

"You're real…" he croaked, struggling to sit up again. "You're real?"

Regulus nodded, and Sirius threw his arms around his brother suddenly, as though afraid he would evaporate into the air if he let go. When Regulus managed to free himself, Sirius advanced on James and hugged him tightly too.

"Listen, mate," James said, untangling himself from Sirius's arms. "We need to get you out of here, and quickly. The sun is going to be coming up soon, and it'll be harder to escape. Moony is waiting for us—"

"Remus is here?" Sirius looked behind James and Regulus into the hallway beyond his cell, his voice suddenly frenzied. "Where is he?"

"Sirius, you need to be quiet," Regulus said, his voice steady and quiet. "You need to trust me—trust us. You need to follow us back through the hospital, stay quiet, and don't do anything rash. Unless you want us all to be thrown in here with you."

Sirius opened his mouth to respond, but thought better of it. Remus was here. He wanted to see Remus desperately.

Even if this was a dream or hallucination, what was the worst that could happen?

…

James walked behind Regulus, his arm wrapped around Sirius's waist so he could help him walk through the corridor. He was emaciated and weak, and when he stood up, James realised that he could barely take a few breaths without running out of stamina.

The stairs back up to the ground floor were the hardest part. Sirius seemed to visibly shy away from the orange lamplight that was shining down from the lanterns on the upper floor. "No, no, no…" he moaned, shaking his head and trying to go back into the basement again. James pulled him forwards firmly, nudging him towards the stairs.

"Moony's right up there," he whispered. "He's waiting for you. We've all been waiting for you."

The encouragement seemed to work for Sirius, as he nodded, his lank hair hanging in his face, and started to shakily make his way up the stairs with James's help.

Regulus waited at the top, checking for anyone authoritative that might be coming around a corner. Once James had made it to the top of the stairs, he looped his arm around Sirius's middle from the other side, and he and James half-dragged Sirius back to the kitchen.

Frank and Remus had finished cleaning up the mess from earlier, and Remus was standing over the sink, rubbing the empty stew pot with a damp sponge. "Moony," whispered Sirius, and Remus dropped the pot into the sink with a clatter and spun around on his heel.

"Sirius!" he said in a broken voice, and he ran across the kitchen, wrapping Sirius so tightly into his arms that he lifted him a few inches off the floor. He cupped Sirius's face and kissed him desperately.

"Nng," Sirius mumbled. "Don't kiss me. I'm disgusting. I haven't seen a toothbrush in forever."

"I really don't care," Remus replied, but he released Sirius. "I'm so happy to see you." He stepped back and looked up and down at Sirius. "What have they done to you?"

"We can talk later," Regulus said suddenly, and he pulled open the lid of the cart. "Sirius, you need to get in the fridge."

"Okay, I'm sure this is a dream now," Sirius replied, backing away from Remus. "I'm not—"

"Sirius!" Regulus snapped suddenly. "We haven't got time for this. This is how James and I got in. This is how we're going to get out. Frank and Remus are going to take you out in it first, then come back for us."

Sirius seemed to muse it over. After a few tense moments, he nodded slowly, and stepped into the refrigerator. "It's going to be cold," Remus said. "And dark. Are you going to be okay?"

Sirius nodded again, and Remus slowly closed the lid. Once he was inside, Regulus nodded at Remus. "Okay, go quickly. I want to get out of here."

"Are you okay, mate?" James called into the cart.

"Did someone say that James and Regulus were brought in this together?" Sirius asked. James glanced over at Regulus, and stifled the urge to laugh.

"I think he's going to be fine," James said. "Just go."

Remus and Frank started to push the cart out, and James closed the kitchen door behind them.

"Now we wait," he said, and leaned up against one of the counters.

"Now we wait," confirmed Regulus.

…

It took just over five minutes before there was the sound of footsteps outside the kitchen door—if Regulus wasn't mistaken, the footsteps sounded like the click-clack of a woman's heel, and not of the loafers that Remus had been wearing.

"Hide," Regulus said suddenly. James looked at him, momentarily confused, but followed suit when Regulus dropped to his knees and hid underneath one of the counters. James squeezed in beside him. Regulus peered through a gap in the counter, watching as a familiar nurse walked into the kitchen, digging around in her handbag as she did.

"Thank God the door was open," she murmured to herself, and started opening cupboards and fridges, shoving random food items into her bag.

"I know her," Regulus breathed to James. "That's the woman—the one I stole the card from."

"Remus and Frank are going to march straight back in here and we'll need to get straight in that cart," James whispered. "We need to get rid of her."

Regulus nodded. "Stay here," he mouthed to James, and took a deep breath before standing up from under the counter and facing the nurse. She gasped and dropped a tin of soup onto the floor.

Her face twisted into what she probably thought was an intimidating expression, and she folded her arms across her chest. "Who are you? What are you doing down here? This is a private medical facility and if you don't have the correct clearance to be here you will be—"

"Oh, you mean like this?" Regulus replied smoothly. He pulled the keycard out of his pocket and held it up to her. "Alecto Carrow, psychiatric nurse. This is you, right?" Regulus glanced back at the image on the keycard. "Not your most flattering angle, Nurse Carrow."

Her face paled instantly and she dropped her arms to her sides. "Where did you get that?" she whispered.

"This old thing?" Regulus sneered. "Oh, I took this out of your handbag last week, when you were asleep in one of the day rooms. You probably shouldn't have been sleeping on the job, right?"

"You can't prove that!" the nurse snapped.

"No, but you'd still have to explain why you lost your extremely important key card. If this kind of thing got into the wrong hands, who knows what could happen?"

The nurse went quiet, her face flickering with silent rage. "What do you want?"

"Just to get out of here without anyone else being notified of our presence."

Nurse Carrow pursed her lips so tightly that they almost disappeared. "And then what—you will give me the card back?"

"Once we're out of here, my friend will leave the keycard with the orderly on the door. He'll tell him that he found it on the kitchen floor." Regulus paused. "But if I leave it for you and I later find out that you've gone to your boss and told him that I was here, then I will make sure you don't just lose your job, but you lose your entire reputation. Do you understand?"

She was silent once more as she considered her options. "How can I trust that you'll do that?"

Regulus shrugged. "You can't. But what other choice do you have?"

She didn't reply, but nodded, apparently dejected. She picked up the dropped can of soup, tucked it back into her handbag, and stalked out of the kitchen. Once she was gone, James stood up from the counter, staring at Regulus in awe.

"What?" Regulus asked, pushing his hair out of his face.

"You are amazing."

…

By some miracle, all four of them ended up back safe in Frank's van. Remus had handed the keycard to the guy on the door at Regulus's instruction, and they'd been able to leave without any interference. Regulus suspected it had a lot to do with the staffing shortage that he'd heard Frank and the orderly talking about.

Frank was in the front by himself now, as Remus had opted to sit on the floor of the back of the van with his arms protectively around Sirius. Sirius hadn't said anything else since getting into the refrigerator, and he was just staring into space as he sat with his head on Remus's shoulder.

Regulus sat across from them beside James, watching Sirius intently. His head rocked with the movement of the van. He looked exhausted, sick, and broken. But he was free.

…

It was nine in the morning by the time they arrived back at Remus's flat.

Remus helped Sirius inside. He was worried that Sirius still hadn't said anything since they left the hospital, but he didn't want to push him. He didn't know what had happened to him there, and he wasn't going to make him talk about it. He'd speak in his own time.

Sirius allowed Remus to lead him to the bathroom and sit him down on the toilet seat. He ran the bath and poured a generous amount of bubble bath in, and helped Sirius remove the dirty hospital uniform he was wearing.

When the clothes dropped to the floor, Remus resisted the urge to cry. Sirius was bruised and skinny, his bones jutting out and his skin covered in scratches. He swallowed his emotions—he needed to be strong for Sirius—and helped Sirius climb into the bath. Sirius pulled his legs to his chest, sighing blissfully as the warm water hit his skin.

Remus lathered up a sponge and washed Sirius gently, rubbing away the grime and the dirt, making sure to touch him extra carefully where he was bruised or hurt. He tipped a jug over Sirius's head and massaged shampoo into hair then washed away the suds. When he was finished, he helped Sirius climb out of the bath and wrapped him in a fluffy towel, then kissed him on the forehead softly.

"If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?" Remus asked.

Sirius looked thoughtful for a minute. "Breakfast," he finally said. "The full works. Eggs, bacon, sausage—everything."

Remus grinned. "Anything. I'll send James down to the shop and I'll make it—"

"No, Moony," Sirius said, shaking his head and chuckling. "You can't cook an egg to save your life. Let's order it in."

…

A week passed, and Regulus had remained in the flat with Sirius, Remus and James—though it had been an initial surprise to Sirius, who had assumed Regulus would go straight back home.

"I'm not going back there," Regulus had explained quietly over breakfast, the first day that Sirius was back safe. "I know I've always been scared of them, but I never thought Mother would...I never thought she would do something like this. I don't ever want to see her again."

"And this," Sirius had said, gesturing between James and Regulus. "This is a thing again, is it?"

Regulus hadn't really known what to say to Sirius, as he didn't really know what was going on himself, but luckily Remus had changed the subject.

It didn't stop Sirius from commenting when he noticed that James and Regulus were sharing a room, but he seemed far too exhausted to deliver his usual level of theatrics.

They had just been starting to settle into some strange normalcy when Lily Evans reappeared on the doorstep, asking to speak to James privately.

"Anything you can say to me you can say in front of my friends," he replied coolly, as he stood in the threshold, with Regulus, Sirius and Remus sitting at the kitchen table behind him.

Lily didn't look angry like she did before. She didn't glare at Regulus or shout at James. Her green eyes were slightly watery and her nose was red, like she'd been crying. "There's been a lot going on at St. Mungo's," she said softly. "It came out that...that there was a prisoner being mistreated by a man who had false paperwork claiming he was a psychiatrist. He's been arrested."

Regulus glanced at Sirius, and noticed his mouth had set in a firm line. As the week had passed, Sirius had divulged some of the events that had happened while he was confined in the asylum.

"The authorities got involved, and did a complete overhaul on the hospital. We're not allowed to do our placements there anymore. You were right, James...this...pretend doctor was treating patients for homosexuality." She looked past James at this point, towards Sirius, who was staring at her blankly. "I'm so sorry."

James didn't look like he was ready to accept her apology. "Is that all you wanted to say?"

Lily's bottom lip wobbled slightly. "There's...there's something else I have to tell you. But I'd really like to tell you privately."

James opened his mouth to retort, but Regulus stood up from the table and nodded for Sirius and Remus to do the same. "It's okay, James," Remus said as they walked into the living room. "We'll see you in a bit."

It wasn't long before James came back into the living room, after Lily had gone. There was no explosive argument this time, and no slammed doors. James was white as a sheet—almost green in fact—and he turned straight to Regulus. "I need to talk to you," he said quietly, and walked towards the stairs to go up to the bedroom. Regulus jumped to his feet to follow him.

"Don't even think about having sex up there," Sirius said. "My brother is a virgin, you know."

"If only he knew," Regulus muttered once he had closed the bedroom door behind him. To his surprise, James didn't laugh. He sat on the edge of the bed, running his hands through his hair until it stood on end. "James, what's the matter?"

James took a breath. "Lily is pregnant."

Regulus felt as though all the air had gone out of him at once. For the last week, he'd been starting to feel so comfortable with James again. He'd been starting to imagine that they could be something again. He felt as though all those thoughts were suddenly evaporating in front of his face.

"Oh," he murmured, and sat down heavily on the end of the bed next to him. "I suppose...you'll be getting back together, then?"

James furrowed his brow and looked at Regulus. "No, Reg."

Regulus was confused. "What? But she's pregnant. She's having your baby."

James shook his head. "That doesn't mean we should stay together just for the sake of a baby. We aren't right for each other—even Lily agreed to that. We would be no good at raising a child if we were at each other's throats for the rest of our lives."

Regulus thought idly of his own parents, who he had never seen be intimate with each other. They didn't even hold hands or kiss one another on the cheek. If he didn't know better, he wouldn't even think that they were married. They had stayed together their entire life, and it hadn't done him or Sirius any good.

"I suppose you're right," Regulus admitted.

James reached out to take Regulus's hand. "I want to be with you, Reg. I know we haven't talked about it yet, but we need to. I...I don't think I'll be able to cope with this...not without you."

Regulus looked down at his hand, which was clasped with James's, then looked back up at his face. "I want to be with you, too."

James's face split into a weak smile. "Really?"

Regulus nodded, and leaned forward to kiss James softly. "I couldn't have got through this without you, and I don't want to be without you ever again. So yeah—really."

...

---

Written For:

- Assignment #11/Muggle Music Task #1: Write about a character seeing someone who broke their heart.

- Race to the top of Mount Potter/Checkpoint 23: (AU) Asylum!AU

- Writing Club/Gotta Catch Them All: 4. (character) Lucius Malfoy

- Writing Club/Written in the Stars: 5. (trait) secretive

- Writing Club/Showtime: 2. (phrase) number one

- Writing Club/Film Festival: 23. (plot point) Trying to free someone/gain freedom

- Writing Club/Elizabeth's Empire: 14. (relationship) mother

- Writing Club/Angel's Archive: 14. (trope) Happily Ever After

- Writing Club/Hobby Hole: 8. (character) Lucius Malfoy

- Writing Club/Artist Appreciation: 29. (weather) rain

- Writing Club/Buttons: Emotions 1. Jealousy

- Writing Club/Sophie's Smut Bucket: 9. (theme) Rebound

- Autumn Seasonal/Days of the Year: 9th October - National Motorcycle Ride Day: Write about someone's first time on a motorbike.

- Autumn Seasonal/Sarcastic Month: 13. (dialogue) "I wish you'd shut up."

- Autumn Seasonal/Jewellery Month: 40. (object) Motorbike

- Autumn Seasonal/National Author Month: 13. (word) Disguise

- Autumn Seasonal/Colours: 2. Auburn

- Autumn Seasonal/Flowers: 2. (dialogue) "I didn't know where else to go."

- Fortnightly/Pretty Much Almost Christmas: (plot point) A Heist

- Fortnightly/Jukebox Day: 7. (dialogue) "That's not how it works."

- Moony's Neon Cafe/Drinks: 22. (emotion) relief

- Sandwich Time/Fillings: 4. (color) yellow

- November Monthly Insert Title: 9. (emotion) fear

- Celebrating Women: 9. (dialogue) "I hope you know what you're doing."

Word Count: 14,826