Author's Note: Hey everyone, Jeez, it's almost through with. Hard to believe, isn't it? Ok, well, Enjoy!
Chapter 41
"The End?"
After they had arrived home, Fiera told her daughter to go and get some sleep.
"Why?" Starfire had questioned.
"Because your going to need it. We'll talk in a couple of hours, ok honey?"
Starfire looked unsure of sleeping at a time like this, but nevertheless she took her mother's advice and went to her room to catch some Z's.
Star entered her small room and took off her funeral wear. She replaced it with a pink night shirt and some pink socks. She crawled under the warm covers and buried her head into the soft pillow. She was grateful for some rest after the exhaustingly tragic events that have recently occupied her life.
While Star napped Fiera sat at the kitchen table, a troubled expression was slowly settling itself onto her face. She was half contemplating what to say to her daughter, half absorbing what had happened in the past day.
She finally decided to get some sleep and walked quietly to her bedroom. There she put on comfortable clothes and went to lay in bed. She, yet again, strung her arm around the other side of the bed where Deramus once slept. It had been like this for years now, but she couldn't get to sleep unless it was laying over the other side of the bed.
The two girls (women, ladies?) woke in a little to the sound of rapping on the front door. Starfire heard Fiera fumble out of bed to answer the door so she went back to sleep. Fiera was sleepily stumbling down the hallway when she heard another series of knocks. Annoyed, she yelled "I'm coming!". She reached the door, unlocked it, and opened it a few inches and inspected the knocker. She had learned to be more careful ever since Starfire and her had been bothered by that strange man.
It was Gordando. She relaxed and opened it wider.
"Hi, sorry I yelled. What's that?"
She gestured towards the package in his hands. He glanced at it too and looked back up at her.
"Oh, this. I just wanted to give you something to cheer you up. It's cookies. Remember those soft light brown with dark brown spotted circles?"
When she nodded he continued.
"I just thought since you three…I mean two liked them so much, I thought, I assumed you'd…"
She could see he was fumbling with the right words, not wanting to say the wrong thing.
"Thank you, Gordando, that was wonderful of you to do. And thanks for your sympathy, it's a rough time."
"Indeed it is. But know you have friends."
He smiled and handed her the cookies.
"I don't know what I'd do without friends like you, Gordy."
Gordando laughed.
"You haven't called me that since we were kids."
She laughed too.
"Yeah, I know. Feels weird."
They stood in silence, reminiscing of the "good times" when they were just kids, without a care or worry in the world. If only it could've stayed that way. Wishful thinking.
"Well I better be going. I've got a party to cater for. Take care, Fiera. Oh, and tell Starfire hi for me, ok?"
"I will. Thanks for everything Gordando."
He nodded, turned away, and walked down the path. Fiera quietly closed the door and laid the warm chocolate chip cookies on the counter. When she went to return to bed she saw Starfire in the hallway. She was rubbing sleep from her eyes and walking towards her.
"Hey honey, up so soon?"
Starfire looked up and nodded.
"Yeah, I woke up and heard you talking to someone and I couldn't get back to sleep. Hey, what's on the counter?"
Fiera went over to the counter and unwrapped the cookies.
"Gordando came and dropped these off for us. Sorry we woke you up. Want one?"
Fiera was already getting out two cookies and fixing glasses of yulg for them.
"That's alright. So what did you want to tell me Mommy?"
Fiera suddenly paused before she sat down, a troubled look suddenly painted her face. She gave one of the glasses and cookies to Starfire before speaking.
"Yes, right. I just…I…I wanted to…"
Fiera suddenly lowered her head to star at her lap.
"Are you alright?"
"Yes, this is just really hard."
Starfire put a had on her mother's. Her mother looked up into Starfire's green eyes. She seemed to make a terrible trying decision and nodded firmly.
"You're going to earth."
Starfire drew her hand back in utter shock. Her emerald eyes grew wide.
"What? What are you talking about Mommy?"
Fiera kept that same confident, strong face on.
"I mean your going to earth to be safe. This place has too many horrible memories for you. I can't let you live in the place where your family fell apart. You have to leave this pain behind. I don't think I'm strong enough to help you through it either honey."
"But I, we can make it through this Mom, I know we can."
Fiera's eyes started to tear up and she raised her voice.
"No, we won't! You have to move on, on to something much better for you. I can't let you stay here and suffer."
"But I love you and I could never leave you behind! I can't, won't leave you behind Mommy!"
Fiera jumped out of her chair and slammed her fist on the table.
"Dammit Starfire! I've cried every single damn night since your father left! I can't stop thinking about him, I can't stop! I won't put you through the same thing, it's not right!"
Starfire looked startled and on the verge of tears.
Fiera turned away fro her small daughter. She put her hands on the counter and looked downwards.
"Please, don't make this any harder than it has to be, sweetie. Your father died here. Your brother killed himself over Renee's death and your sister ran away! They both cut themselves! But most of all you see me fall apart every single damn day right in front of you! I try to be strong, but I'm not! You know I'm not strong, I can't help you get through it! And don't you think I'm not ashamed of it, either!
"I love you Starfire, I love you with the whole of my heart. That's why I have to ask you to leave, to go to a better place. To get away from Tameran."
Starfire sunk down in her chair, trying to wrap her head around all this. She finally spoke.
"But, Mommy, I want to be with you, that's the best thing for me."
Fiera walked away from the counter and sat down next to her daughter, stroking Starfire's hand.
"I'm wearing away honey, I'm almost gone. I can't hold on for much longer. I can't do that to you, you don't deserve it at all."
Starfire looked into her mother's soft, loving, yet in truth, tired and weary eyes. She nodded her head and tears started rolling down her cheeks. They both cried and hugged each other. They sat for a while, enjoying each other's company as much as possible as they both dreaded Starfire's departure.
Starfire had went to her room after her mother and her had sat for a while. She was leaving for Earth tomorrow at dusk. She had to pack her things and rest up for the depressing journey ahead of her. When she had finished packing, she went to hug her mother goodnight and went to bed. You can only imagine the dreams (and nightmares) the two had during the night.
Fiera's Morning-
When the next day came Fiera was up early. She had been tossing and turning all night. The little sleep she had gotten was filled with nightmares of things happening to her daughter. She had finally gotten up and went outside to get some water from the well. She had returned inside and was sitting at the kitchen table sewing to consume time.
She now finished the last stitch on her project she had worked on for her daughter. She had made her a pink quilt to take to earth. Fiera had stayed up many nights working on this when she couldn't sleep. It looked warm enough. It also had Starfire's name etched into a corner in purple thread.
She now folded it into a neat square and put it in a box for her to take. She wrapped it in decorative canvas and tied a string around it. She finished her water and went to wake up Star.
When she approached Starfire's door, she noticed a little note was on the floor. She bent to pick it up and worry flooded her from memory of another note...
Good Morning Mommy! I went out to see Tameran one more time. I'll be back in a little while, OK? Don't worry, I'm fine.
Love Star.
Relief now washed over Fiera as she crumpled the note and threw it away. She would give Starfire some time to say good bye to her home planet before her departure.
Starfire's Morning-
Starfire had been up since 4:00 this morning. She had gotten a cookie and yulg and sat at the table eating them slowly. Then finally, she had scrounged up a piece of paper and a pencil. She wrote a quick letter to her mother and went to get dressed.
After she got ready, she laid the note on the floor in front of her bedroom door, grabbed a thin jacket, and headed outside. At first she went to visit the park where Deramus and her had spent his last day together. She passed the stand where they had gotten furros and wrestled, trying to somehow push away the grim reality he was going to die in the morning.
She turned away, both happy and very sad from the memory. She continued to walk until she arrived at the main street where Gordando and Renee's parents live. She crossed Gordando's and saw the tables and chairs outside his house, the southern end of the lake that bordered his back lawn, and the boat Renee and Anders went on their date in, where Anders had proposed.
She continued to walk and passed the earth visitor's base. The memory of curing Anders' stomach ache suddenly flashed in her mind like a roaring train. She moved further down the road to Renee's house next. She could suddenly see Renee's coffin being lowered into her grave. All kinds of disturbing images flashed in her mind, all related to death. She ran past that house and found herself approaching the mines.
Starfire decided to go visit Section J's graves. She passed the entrance and went ahead up the hill that the fallen miners had been buried at. She finally kneeled down to the sign. She took the sleeve of her jacket and rubbed off the spider webs that were on the small wooden plaque. It still read, although somewhat faded:
"Here lie the noble workers of Section J who were crushed in a tragic crumble. Their names:
Toi
Josher
Juret
Kilamu
Alder
Popole
Tendra
All were noble and just, they died knowing that they would be always remembered as the Section J crew, the workers that never gave up on a job that needed to be done."
She ran her fingers over the indented words. She stopped at Tendra's name. That had been Anders' best friend. He had seemed so broken after he died in the mining accident. She saw dead flowers laying next to the sign and went to go pick new ones. She went into the forest and found beautiful white flowers that had blue centers. They were perfectly breathtaking.
She picked five or six of those and went back to the small sign. Starfire bent down and used her powers to singe a small hole in the ground and put the flowers in. She filled up the empty space with dirt and stood up. She stepped back and gazed at it. The flowers seemed to make everything beautiful.
"Thank you, Tendra. He needed you when no one else could help him. Rest in peace."
With that she walked away and headed to the forest. She passes so many memorable things on the way. Her school, her friends' house. Although she never had anymore friends after her father died, she had become depressed and "boring". She really never has been the same. She was passing the entrance to the forest now. She remembered so much, her family playing games here, her siblings and her swimming in the lake, her racing through the forest to save Anders so many times… She finally reached he clearing that led to the lake.
To many memories ensued here. She remembered seeing Anders at the top of the cliff, dropping the ring, falling in. Then she remembered jumping in, the warm water would have normally felt good without those circumstances. She remembered Anders at the bottom, looking as if he was struggling with someone. Next something was pulling them down. She was on the shore, bring him awake. Pumping his chest. Hope and sorrow collide. And he awakes.
She finally realized it, here and now. He had been struggling with some demon Renee. The darkness in her heart sprouted from the good and tried to bring them down. Anders must have had a vision from an angel, Renee, that made him keep going. I guess demons and angels really do exist. He must of looked to Renee and said he loved her. He meant it towards Star too.
And she was suddenly opened up to why he killed himself in a new light. He really had loved her that much, enough to die to be with her. They had been the best of friends and then the truest lovers. She could only hope that he was happy with her now.
Then she traveled to the site on Tameran that would make it hardest to leave, but also even harder to stay. It was Anders's and Renee's graves. There were the tombstones and the fresh soil over them. She remembered seeing his dead body on the spot of ground he was now underneath. She also remembered Renee's coffin and her body lying on the table in the Mastry's hut after she had the heart attack. But now Starfire stood over these graves with the knowledge that they were together, forever.
"Goodbye, Anders. My brother. You were so kind to me, we shred a special bond, I know it. We still do, and I believe you'll always be with me and mom. Do you remember the pain, or do you bask in happiness alone now? Oh, how I wish things were how they had been before all this happened. If Daddy was still here, would any of this of happened? I know you want me to be happy, but I miss you, Dad, and Blackfire so much. I ache inside thinking of how much fun we used to have. Would you come back, just for a moment, so I can say goodbye to you? I'm leaving for Earth, do you know that? Are you an angel, or just a mere memory, brother? Please, I just want to see you for a few moments, just to say a final goodbye."
She looked to the sky, hoping to see her brother appear out from the clouds and greet her.
And that's just what happened readers.
She felt a slight breeze at first, then a gust of wind, powerful and filling. It formed itself into the figure of Anders, her dead brother.
He looked at her with love and joy. He smiled continuously. He nodded his head and pulled her to him in a deep hug. She gladly returned it and buried her head into his shoulder. She could even smell Anders. She pulled out and looked at his face. He hadn't seen him this happy since he had proposed to Renee.
"Starfire, I know that Mom has decided to send you to earth, and it's the right thing to do. Please, be happy there. I know you'll have a wonderful future there with the earthlings. You'll make friends, find love there, but also face many trials that you will have to use your powers to overcome. Remember, never abandon a friend."
He saw her on the brink of confused tears.
"I'm happy with Renee and Dad. I want you to know I love you, and I'll always be there with you."
Starfire was speechless, but also filled with a love and understanding that must only come from talking with an angel.
He looked up into the sky and, after nodding up to someone, returned his gaze to her.
"I have to go, but remember baby sister, love never vanishes."
"Anders?"
"Yes?"
"I love you, and I'm glad your happy."
He smiled back at her while he ascended up.
"I'll see you around Star."
Starfire smiled before returning a statement the two siblings hadn't used since they were extremely young.
"See you later, pillaptigator."
He laughed.
"In a little while, octigile."
They waved goodbye as he disappeared into the sky above.
She felt herself starting to cry. He had disappeared now, so she decided to go home. Starfire had made her final peace with Tameran.
When she arrived home, she was greeted by Fiera who was sitting at the kitchen table, apparently waiting for her.
She went and sat down with her mother. She was, in a way, exhausted from her encounters today. Mommy is right, there are to many painful memories here.
"Are you ready, honey?"
Starfire looked up at her mother and nodded.
"Lets go get your things Starfire, it's time to leave."
The walk to her departing place was gloomy and filled with a painful silence. When they arrived at the place where the atmosphere around Tameran is thinnest, she dropped her suitcases and hugged her mother.
"Oh Mommy, I don't want to leave you here. You need me…"
"No Starfire, this planet holds nothing but misery for you, please leave me behind and move on to better things."
Starfire was crying again. Fiera was crying too. They hugged and cried. But after a while, Fiera broke it apart and handed Starfire her bags. Starfire could see how hard this was for her, all her family was gone. They hugged one last time and Starfire flew a little off the ground.
"Mommy, we'll see each other again, wont we?"
Fiera was smiling and crying now.
"Absolutely, in this life or in Mithra, the great beyond, we'll see each other. I love you honey, and I wish you the best."
"I love you Mommy."
"I love you to, Starfire."
And with that the mother and daughter departed as the young Tameran ascended into outer space on her quest to get to earth.
Little did they know they would never see each other again.
(Back at Titans Tower)
"I was captured by those soldiers. I escaped and came here. You all know the rest."
The Titans all sat in silence. Robin was the first to speak.
"I'm sorry that all happened to you, but you sound as if you've grown form it all."
He put his arm around her shoulders in comfort. She was near crying, as they could all tell.
"I'm glad Anders was happy with Renee and your Dad, Star." Cyborg said.
They all nodded in agreement.
"It must have been so horrible to be separated from your Mom like that." Raven sympathized.
"I'm glad you came out of all this okay Starfire." Beast Boy commented.
"Yes, and now your among friends, Star."
She snuggled closer to him on the couch.
"Yes, surely I am." They all took a pause before Starfire said they should all get to sleep, it was late.
Only Robin and Starfire were left. Beast Boy tried to stay, but was quickly pulled out of the room by Raven.
The two Titans were sitting close on the couch.
"Starfire, I've been meaning to ask you, what's up with the cuts on your hands?"
A pang of nervousness hit Starfire. She opened her injured hand so they could both see.
"I saw him in the mirror Robin, I saw Anders. I got mad and scared and I wanted to make him go away, so I shattered the mirror. I'm so sorry, Raven fixed it, I lied to you both… I'm sorry Robin, please don't be mad."
Robin lightly grasped her hand and looked into her emerald eyes.
"I'm not mad Star, I just wanted to know. Are you okay, do we need to get stitches for them? Look, ones bleeding. I'll go get gauze."
He got up and jogged into the bathroom. Starfire felt extremely guilty. She had always tried to be honest with her friends, just like her brother had told her to. His forgiveness made her feel better though.
He came back with gauze and wrapped her hand in it.
"There, all better."
"Thank you, friend."
She had a dismayed look on her face.
"Oh Starfire, it's okay really, I understand why you lied to me…"
"No, its not that. I just feel sort of relieved by telling my friends my life story, it takes the load off."
He looked surprised.
"We're always happy to listen Starfire."
They paused before looking into each others eyes.
"Your brother said, you'd find friendship, love, and a demand of your powers here."
"Yes, he did."
"You've found friends, and a use of your powers, but have you found love?"
She looked at him, then down at her hands. She finally looked into his masked eyes once again, and said: "Yes, I believe I have."
And he leaned in towards her, she leaned into him, and their lips locked in their first loving kiss. He slid his hand to her jawbone and she slip hers onto his shoulders. They parted for a mere moment to catch their breaths before kissing once again. They parted and looked at each other. They smiled at each other and settled into each others embrace. She rested her head against his chest and his head was tilted onto the top of her red hair. Starfire couldn't help thinking her father, Anders, and Renee were watching down on her.
The Tameranian Girl had found her peace, her love, and her home.
Fin
Author's Note: well, that's The Tameranian Girl. I would like to thank all of the reviewers and readers. I know I always took a long time to update, but I think I made up for it with quality. If you've ever seen the movie October Sky, you know about the mining part of it. I just want to say that I got the mining idea from that movie (great film, excellent watch). Be watching for my next Teen Titans story. I don't know the title yet, but I do know the plot and I will be starting on it as soon as this story is done. It was extremely interesting to write this story. I did grow to not like Starfire's character after watching more of the show, but I made up my own little Starfire. I now don't like the Robin and Star pairing, I like Robin and Raven ones, but I made up my own little Starfire where she wasn't as annoying. I am Lutheran and do not believe in other gods or anything like Mithra or Miyu. I just made them up to make it realistic. Jesus Christ saves. See you next time guys, thanks for all the support and dedication.
-The Ninja Who Wanted To Be A Samurai