DISCLAIMER: I don't own 7th Heaven or anything related to it besides the content and characters that I created. I also don't really know anything about police business or jails, so sorry.

Before she could say anything more, Andrew's lips were brushing hers. It was over before she could really process what had happened but what she did know was that she wanted more of those kisses. Definitely more.

Chapter 16: It Feels Okay

She hadn't even been home yet and she was being bombarded with more action that she'd ever had. Every day a new attorney would come in and talk to her about Rebecca's trial. It was almost too much to bear. But she saw the look in her parent's eyes. They wanted her to do this. They wanted Rebecca to suffer in the most Christian way possible. Life without parole.

So every day she sat there, retelling her horrific adventure, describing her torture, recalling memories she wished she'd forgotten all for the sake of everyone else around her. But what was the difference? Her life would be easier when it was all over, she could wait a while longer until she got peace.

Her only solace was in her friends and in Andrew. He'd been her beacon of light through the whole ordeal. True, they hadn't shared anymore of those amazing kisses but he'd visited her everyday. And that was enough.

Lucy tried to comfort her every day after more people had come and asked her about her tragedy. She knew it was useless; no amount of motherly love could make up for the fact that she was reliving the worst day of her life over and over again. She only hoped that it helped a little. And as Kay would admit, it did. Just not enough.

"So, what's up?" Brooke asked. She had been sitting with Kay for a few minutes now but hadn't yet said anything.

"Eh… just talking to the police again. Nothing out of the ordinary."

"Yeah, well, look on the bright side, you're almost ready to go home," Brooke said, referring to the fact that the doctors had cleared her way home. The only part of her that still broken was her mind and that had never been all that great in the first place.

"Yup," Kay said and stared back at the TV. The girls were watching the end of a soap opera they used to love but now felt indifferent about. Indifferent, yup, I know that feeling. "So, how's the boyfriend?"

Brooke started rattling off for almost 45 minutes about every single small detail in her love life, which was the exact plan Kay had. She didn't feel like having a conversation today, especially with one of the people that she would tell everything she was feeling to if she was asked. She vaguely listened as Brooke told her about the new movie they'd seen and the way he'd looked at another girl and she'd gotten mad, only to find out that the other girl was related to him. Apparently, they'd shared a big laugh.

Kay nodded at that point and gave her friend a soft smile, just to say that she was listening. But Brooke knew better than that. She also knew not to push it so she continued to ramble, occasionally glancing down at her friend. Kay was out there, somewhere, and Brooke sourly hoped that her dear friend would come back.

After Brooke had left, Kay watched old reruns of 50's comedies trying to gain composure. Soon her dad would be in with her, telling her about the proceedings with Rebecca. They had already started jury selection and she was told that even the New York Times had picked up her story. Just what I need.

"Hey," she heard a voice say from the doorway. She turned her head slightly towards it and smiled when she saw whom it was. "I was worried about you."

"Grandpa," was all she could say before opening her arms and gesturing Eric to her. He gladly walked over and gave his granddaughter a hug, the first hug in quite a long time.

"So, how are you? Really?"

"I'm okay. How's the jury selection?"

"Kay, I didn't come here to talk about the case; I came here to talk about you. Your mother and father have been telling your grandmother and I about you and what you tell them and let me tell you this. You can fool them but you could never fool me. I always knew when you were pretending when you were a child and I still know. So, are you going to tell me how you really feel or are you going to keep pretending and ultimately hurt yourself more?"

Kay's mouth was agape after hearing his words. She knew that he was a reverend and was supposed to know everything but damn! She had to admit, he was good. "Grandpa…"

"Don't grandpa me! If you'd like, it can be under the Reverend-Parishioner confidentiality rule."

Reluctantly, Kay nodded her head and started playing with the bed fabric, trying to think of where to start. Slowly, she found the words. "I'm okay."

"Kay…" Eric started.

"No, really. I'm okay. Just okay. I don't feel anything but okay. I'm not mad or sad or hurt or scared or… even… violated or something. I just feel okay. And I really don't think that's right, is it?" When her eyes met his, they were pleading, begging him to tell her that it was right for her to feel that way.

"Sweetie," he said, reaching out to stroke her hair, "You have been through a terrible ordeal. Lots of people do in this world. And they all have a different way of dealing with it. You have always bottled everything up and I think that even when you want to let it out, you can't. It's just your way. But you always deal. And you'll deal with this too. It might just take some time, that's all. Don't worry too much about it. You need to focus on getting out of this hospital and making sure that Rebecca is in jail, so she can never do this to anyone again. I am glad that you told me how you feel."

"So am I," she said, not really knowing if she meant it. Eric stroked her hair once more before leaving. As he left she knew only one thing for certain. She felt okay and that wasn't okay.

Author's Note: Yeah it's short and I haven't updated in a while. I really don't know how to end this for the next story in this series. Plus I'm really bad at legalities, which, if you'd talk to my attorney, is really ironic. I'm just kidding… mostly. If anyone is still reading this, than thank you and I'm really sorry about how bad I am about it. I want to write but I just can't think of anything to write. Review please.