CHAPTER 15: A Fractured Mask

"You realise how much of a headache this has been, yes? You come to me and ask me to prepare these overtures behind our commander's back? What is going on Leliana?" Josephine asked with her hands steepled in front of her, giving Leliana quite the reproachful glare. It was a power pose that she knew Leliana favoured as well when the occasion allowed her a desk.

"Our Herald raised some concerns–,"

"Concerns that are perfectly legitimate, but we can't afford to be fragile right now," Josephine pointed out. Leliana raised an eyebrow. "But I see your point. And your arguments were persuasive."

"I assume you've sent the letters," Leliana responded while ignoring Josephine's concern.

"Of course I have. Do you have a preference? I mean, I know one of them, well…" Josephine trailed off as she let out a weary sigh.

"Is a former adversary of mine?" Leliana smirked. "Please, if I never learned to work with people I have ah, interesting history with, you and I wouldn't even be working together now, no?"

"Leliana!" Josephine hissed as she failed to restrain a rare blush. She was thankful for her darker skin, for exactly situations like these, but she knew Leliana wasn't fooled for a moment.

"What? I'm just saying that there are levels of comfort with certain people from my past. On one end of the scale was Marjolaine, on the other is you." Leliana didn't even flinch while speaking of the woman who had broken her trust in people. Josephine noticed this and smiled.

"So what your saying is that us former associates of yours are either lovers you avenge yourself upon and lovers who you hire to run a crusade?" Josephine was the one smirking now.

"Well. No. Unfortunately. Though with this one," Leliana says as she nudges the copy of the letter they sent to their candidate from Cullen's replacement, "Isn't a former lover. Though I will admit Kallian and I certainly considered seducing her into our bed for a spot of fun once upon a time on account of her having a conscience…and other things."

"Was this before or after she threw the Hero in the dungeon?" Josephine asked, genuinely intrigued.

"After Morrigan and I saved her. Well, Kallian initially flirted with her before the battle of Ostagar, but that obviously didn't work out. And then she met me," Leliana's smile was more than a little smug now. "But after Ser Cauthrien defeated Kallian in combat, well I can't blame my wife for having a wandering eye in that situation. It certainly helped that she made certain threats to ensure the guards leave Kallian well alone despite being enemies at the time."

"Truly?" Josephine asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, there's nothing wrong with wandering eyes Josie, so long as our hearts remain intertwined, and they most certainly are. And Ser Cauthrien is quite the specimen," Leliana's lecherous tone was not what Josephine was expecting when she walked into this very serious conversation regarding replacing their Commander behind his back.

"And our second candidate? What of Guard-Captain Aveline Vallen of Kirkwall? Does she meet you ah, standards Leliana?" Josephine was mostly joking.

Leliana let out a small laugh, "Oh, she's quite beautiful too. Though I see complications asking her away from Kirkwall. Also, she might kill Cassandra, or visa versa, and while it would be intriguing to find out who would win in a contest of arms…we cannot afford that right now."

"Oh, is that your only concern?" Josephine rolled her eyes.

Leliana just shrugged, almost playfully, before some of the mirth left her eyes. "In all seriousness, I do worry she and Cassandra would clash over our resident Seeker's treatment of Varric. They were not gentle with him, and he has not fully recovered from it."

Josephine's brow furrowed as she processed Leliana's implications. "I did not notice any obvious signs of injury."

"Neither have I, at least not since before everything fell apart. But his mental state isn't that hard to pick up on, especially in her presence. He still flinches when she enters his vicinity much of the time. She and the other Seekers traumatised him during their interrogation to find Hawke. But that's not what this conversation is about."

"You truly believe Aveline won't be able to put aside her anger for Cassandra?" Josephine asked. "Would it be a bad idea to summon both of them here?" Josephine wondered aloud.

"It would be worth a try, but for all we know they might refuse. We should get a reply before the Herald and the rest of them return from their mission in Val Royeaux," Leliana paused. "I wouldn't count on her recruiting Vivienne de Fer. After what we found out about her, and then sent to inform her encounter with the former First Enchanter, I wouldn't be surprised if we hear word of Madame Vivienne's untimely and likely horrific death." Leliana could've sounded a little more upset about that possibility, but she didn't feel like lying to Josephine.

"You really think her so brash?" Josephine asked, all mirth gone from her eyes. She was remembering the way Yasmin had so casually slaughtered the Templars who tried to hurt her. Josephine was ashamed to admit it had given her nightmares like she hadn't had since she had unknowingly killed her friend during her ill-advised jaunt as a Bard.

"She scares you," Leliana surmised softly.

"No! She, it's just…" Josephine tried to deny it but shook her head. "I don't know. On one hand, it's obvious she's dedicated to the cause. She's no prisoner being lead around by the nose anymore, if indeed she ever was. Her good works in the Hinterlands may prove vital. Though I fear she may need to return there. The enclave of Apostates evaded them before they had to away to Val Royeaux, and while she and Cassandra may have to return to deal with the apostates, her eradication of the rogue Templars undoubtedly stabilised the region for the moment." Josephine paused.

"You haven't answered my question," Leliana pointed out. "Her calculated violence against our enemies in the Hinterlands doesn't change how she made you feel in that room though does it? She may help the widow with her husband's stolen ring, or leading home a wayward druffalo. But you can't forget way those Templars were screaming, squirming on the ground,–"

"Leliana," Josephine pleaded softly. Leliana voice had become more detached in this moment than Josephine had heard in a long while.

Leliana blinked and chastised herself for accidentally letting out her more callous side. "I apologize. I didn't mean to goad you, or hurt you like I obviously have. I forgot myself," Leliana said softly.

Josephine gave her old friend a sad look. 'I forgot myself.' Josephine could read between the lines; Leliana was so used to talking to herself alone, or to her agents, that she had begun to slip when muting that darkness in her that being the Left Hand transformed from a pond into a great reservoir. She didn't really know how to talk to 'normal' people anymore without the evil of the Bard creeping through the cracks.

"It's alright. I'll survive," Josephine replied with more than a hint of weariness. "Yasmin does scare me. But I also believe Andraste sent her. Paradoxical, isn't it."

"There's nothing wrong with paradoxes; especially when it is your feelings that are the subject." Leliana paused before softly asking, "What do you think of her beyond her penchant for ruthless violence?" Leliana asked.

The wording of that stopped Josephine cold. Leliana's tone was not the kind of tone she'd be taking if she was talking about the Herald. Leliana would sound matter of fact, perhaps even slipping in a joke or two. Leliana's question was soft…and…Joephine nearly gasped as she realised the question Leliana's heart was really asking. "Leliana," Josephine said as she placed her hand on top of Leliana's too pale one. "Are you sure we're still talking about Yasmin?"

Leliana's brief look of realisation and horror disappeared behind her well trained Bard mask. Josephine chased the look though, "Leliana, answer me."

"Of course!" Leliana replied curtly. Josephine squeezed her friend's hand as she thought about what to say next.

They were in the war room, luckily, so there was a compliment of pastries they had managed to procure from Val Chevin that morning. Josephine walked over and grabbed a pain au chocolat (the late Justinia V's favourite) and walked back to where her brooding friend was sitting. She split it, and thrust half of it into Leliana's hand. Leliana was torn between bemused and guarded. "Leliana. You know I love you right? There is nothing you have done in the past, nothing that was done to you in the past, which would make me turn from your side. Even though you're sometimes scary, and a ruthless killer by necessity, you're still my best friend, and I love you. I just thought you needed to hear that while your wife is not hear to tell you the same thing."

Despite the bard's resistance, Leliana's eyes glistened, and her lip wobbled before she smothered by the pain au chocolat she stuffed in her mouth to cover the sound of her choked sob. But all that did was summon memories she had long since thought buried; waking up in a chantry. Dorothea, the voice that gave her the lock picks to escape from the soul-ruining horrors she experienced as a captive in Raleigh's dungeon.

The future Divine had walked over to the bed Leliana had been recovering on, holding a small platter of the same pastry now in her mouth with kind words of comfort and faith in her character on her lips; just as Josie was doing now. Josephine's face replaced Dorothea's in Leliana's mind as the red head returned to the present.

"Leliana, do you hear me?" Josephine intoned as she cupped the redhead's cheeks. For just a moment, Josephine could see the vulnerable young woman Leliana used to be. Scared for entirely different reasons now, but it was there. And then Leliana recovered herself.

"I hear you Josie," Leliana whispered.