Hey guys! I'm back with the third chapter of We Three Assassins! :D I'm rather excited for this fic considering the feedback I received just for the first two chapters. Anyway, I do thank MsNutella for offering her assistance in translating Arabic for me and I won't have any need for Arabic in this chapter but I will next chapter. I don't know why but I don't need it just yet. I am actually double-tasking right now by writing for both this fic and my other fic 31 Days. I just am on a writing high I don't know exactly now. XD haha! Anyway, enough of my rambling
ONTO THE STORY!
The lights of the lab flick on suddenly and a chorus of groans fills the small room. "Rise and shine ladies." Desmond smirks beside the switch. "We've got a big day ahead of us."
Altair shoots up from his sleeping bag, unaffected by the sudden light entering his eyes. "What exactly do you mean?"
Desmond stares at the Arabian, startled by how quick he was able to get up compared to Ezio and Connor who are still grumbling in their spots. "Uhh, well, I was thinking we should go to the mall to get you guys some normal clothes."
"What's wrong with our robes?" Altair asks his tone slightly hostile.
Desmond hesitates, searching his mind for the right words. "People now don't exactly dress… er… " he gestures awkwardly to Altair's assassin robes.
Altair arches his eyebrow. "Yes?"
"They don't dress so… odd… "Desmond finally chokes out.
Altair gives Desmond a confused look. "I've seen how your 'celebrities' dress and I believe that our robes are quite normal compared to their ridiculous garb."
"True," realization suddenly causes Desmond to shake his head. "Wait, how did you see what celebrities look like?"
"Couldn't sleep so I poked around on one of those strange boxes you have and stumbled across some rather interesting stuff." Altair smirks mischievously.
Desmond scrunches his nose. "Okay, creepy," he pauses, looking at the two assassins that remain asleep. "Do you think you could get those two up?"
"With pleasure," Altair chuckles darkly, crouching beside Ezio.
Desmond watches intently as Altair gently places his hands on Ezio's shoulders. "What are you doing?"
"Shh," Altair hisses before suddenly jerking Ezio up and shouting. "GET UP YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF FLESH!"
Ezio literally jumps out of his skin and smacks Altair in the face. "What is your problem?!" He shouts, standing up. "Are you insane?!"
"No," Altair states calmly as he walks over to the wall and jumps up, grabbing the pipeline, and starts shuffling to where Connor is sleeping on the ceiling pipes.
Shaun, Lucy and Rebecca all walk in as soon as Altair grabs Connor's robes and yank him down from the pipe. This causes Connor to land hard on the ground with a loud THUD!
Altair jumps down, landing beside the Native American who snaps up at him. "What the heck was that?!" Connor demands.
Altair refuses the urge to laugh at the Native's aggression. "It was time for you to wake up princess."
Shaun and Rebecca snicker behind Desmond. Connor gives Altair a disbelieving look. "I'm not a princess."
"But you are because you didn't sleep on the ground with us commoners." Altair retorts.
"I just like sleeping off the ground." Connor says sternly.
"Well I like sleeping in a bed and you don't see me dragging one of their beds in here, do you?" Altair points out.
Connor shakes his head, still dizzy from the fall. "Whatever, it doesn't matter."
"Okay, guys," Desmond says, clapping his hands together. "I have already informed Altair that we need to get you all some new modern clothes so we are going to the mall."
"What's a mall?" Connor asks.
"It's a large building full of restaurants and stores." Shaun replies simply.
"Lucy and I will remain here while we work on the Animus," Rebecca says. "Is that cool with you two?"
Shaun hesitates. "I don't know if I want to be part of this imminent disaster."
"Oh come on," Lucy pleads. "It will give you some time to study their behavior."
Shaun suddenly perks up to the idea, passing a glance over to Altair, "Sounds fun."
Altair notices this and gags internally. "Great," he mumbles.
"It's settled then, we are going to the mall!" Desmond declares excitedly.
oOoOoOo
About halfway to the mall, Altair was already trying to kill Shaun, leaving Ezio and Connor having to try and keep their much stronger ancestor at bay. "I will tear his intestines out and use them as streamers in my room!" Was one of the many disturbing threats Altair hit Shaun with. One of his other threats was; "Touch me again and I'll rip your genitals out and make you eat them!"
By the time they reached the mall, Altair used his new strength he gained from his anger to literally break the door to the white SUV off its hinges and then try to whack Shaun against the head with it. Yet, somehow through all the hostility Shaun persisted in trying to study Altair, making the assassin scream all kinds of obscenities in both Arabian and English, scaring a family with two small children walking to their car. Desmond grabs Altair's arm. "Dude, calm down, there are children out here!"
"I'll calm down when I see Shaun splattered across this whole lot!" Altair growls, pulling his arm from Desmond's grasp.
Shaun laughs even though part of him is completely terrified of the assassin. "Oh come now, Altair, you're making such a fuss over nothing."
"You call being groped nothing?" Altair spits. "What is the matter with you?!" He flails his arms in anger, catching Connor in the face, knocking him to the ground.
Ezio stares at the Native American writhing in pain on the ground. "Wow…" He looks at Desmond. "You sure this is a good idea?"
Desmond helps Connor up. "I'm not so sure anymore."
"Good," Altair snaps. "Can we go home now?"
"If we go home you will be trapped in the carriage with Shaun's prodding hands again." Connor growls, his voice muffled due to him holding his hand to his nose.
Desmond laughs. "I love how you just called the SUV a carriage."
Connor shrugs. "That's pretty much what it is; a horseless carriage."
"I would suppose so," Shaun says. "But we can't stand in the parking lot arguing over such nonsense."
"Shaun's right," Desmond says.
"Am I ever not?" Shaun smirks.
Desmond rolls his eyes. "Anyway, let's go inside, buy some clothes, and leave."
"Alright," Altair says standing beside Ezio. "But if Shaun gets within a foot of me I will tear his arms out of their sockets."
"Deal," Desmond says. "Let's go," with that he turns and starts walking towards the mall's entrance.
"Did you just agree to allow Altair to maim me?" Shaun calls as Altair gives him a murderous grin. "D- Desmond, please," he calls chasing the group.
When they walk inside the mall, the three assassins all stare bewildered at the structure. "Pretty awesome, huh?" Desmond says, making a showy gesture of the whole place.
"Indeed," Altair says, looking up the three stories of stores. "It's impress- "He feels a slight prodding in his side. "You have five seconds to remove your hands or I will remove them for you." Altair feels Shaun move his hands away and relaxes a little.
Desmond looks at Shaun. "Dude, that's starting to get a little creepy, well, creepier."
"I'm just fascinated is all." Shaun states casually.
"Well stop it before you lose a limb." Desmond chuckles.
"Hello," Ezio says when his eyes catch a certain frilly store beside them. "I think I've just found my store." He adjusts his collar and puts on his best smile as he walks into Victoria's Secret.
"Of course he would go in there," Connor rolls his eyes. "Shame isn't it Altair?"
Altair nods. "Simply disappointing," he pauses, his expression dead. "I think I will go in after him."
"I thought Altair said he was better than that?" Desmond snorts as he watches the Arabian saunter to the store.
Connor shakes his head. "What a pity."
"I like that store," Shaun says.
Both Connor and Desmond slowly turn their gazes to the straight-face Englishman who is simply eyeing one of the giant posters outside the store. Desmond holds back a laugh. "Why?"
Shaun shrugs. "It's a fun time-killer."
Connor scratches the back of his head, coughing awkwardly. "Of course," he snickers softly to himself.
About a minute later both Altair and Ezio run out of the store followed by a crowd of screaming girls. Both assassins with goofy looks on their faces and a pair of underwear on Ezio's head. Desmond watches in shock as he listens to the girls shouting; "Ezio! Altair! We love you!"
"Well shit," Desmond says.
"What?" Connor asks, watching the chaos unfold.
"The government covered up our operation by creating a series of video games called Assassins Creed." Desmond says. "All these girls must play that game."
"How is that covering it up?" Connor asks confused.
"It's sort of a hiding-in-plain sight kind of thing." Shaun says. "They record part of the stuff we do and put it in a video game. Some of the stuff is made up so it seems even less real."
"Oh," Connor says, he doesn't really understand but he's satisfied.
"Guess we better get them." Desmond sighs, walking into the crowd of screaming girls. "Excuse me ladies!" Desmond calls. "Please step away from these men!"
"And who are you?" A blonde snaps.
"Law enforcement," Desmond flashes his driver's license but it's fast enough they don't notice.
All the girls look scared as they back away from Ezio and Altair. "Guys, come with me."
The two assassins oblige, passing one final wink to the girls. They all swoon and giggle to themselves, walking away.
When Desmond gets the two enough away from the crowd he pinches the bridge of his nose, attempting to calm himself down. "We came here to buy you three clothes. Not for you to flirt with girls."
"I went in there to get this fool and those girls recognized me." Altair says, his expression hard once more.
"Don't tell me you didn't enjoy that." Ezio pokes Altair's side playfully, winking at him.
"Are you homosexual?" Altair asks plainly.
Ezio appears taken aback. "Am I what?!"
"You know, homosexual, you like men. I know Shaun is." Altair gives the aforementioned Britain a cold glare.
"I do not like men!" Ezio says appalled.
"Neither do I." Shaun growls.
"Then why can you not keep your hands off me?" Altair asks plain and simple.
Shaun hesitates. "It's research."
"You mean you've never seen a full-grown man before?" Altair asks arching his eyebrow.
"I've never seen a full-grown ancient assassin from Jerusalem." Shaun says.
"What's the difference?" Altair asks dumbfounded.
"Okay that's enough you two!" Desmond steps between. "Can we please just buy some clothes and leave?"
"Of course Desmond, my friend," Ezio places his hand on Desmond's shoulder. "Just ignore these idiotas."
Desmond sighs. "Do you have any idea how hard that is?"
"Oh, trust me," Connor steps forward. "We know."
"I'm going to murder you!" Altair shouts at Shaun who is pulling on his robes once more.
Desmond sighs, "This is going to be a long day."
"Get back here so that I may remove your genitals!"
There ya have it! My third chapter! Don't worry, the clothes shopping will be just as, if not more hectic than this chapter! Hope you enjoyed and I will hopefully see you guys next chapter! BYEEEEE!