Desmond watches the assassins as they all sleep. He needs to wake them up, but the fear of being assaulted holds him back. Altair's snoring echoes through the room. Connor is tossing and turning as he tries his damndest to drown out the horrid noise, but his constant movement causes him to tumble from his perch. He plops directly between Ezio and the thunder-nosed Altair, snapping both of them awake. Altair lunges to his feet clutching his squeaky pony tight in his fists as if it is a weapon capable of harm. "What was that?"
"That was a whole man." Ezio says dryly. He sits up from his makeshift blanket cot, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "There are less painful ways to jump down from high posts, Connor."
Connor scowls at Ezio, then his gaze drifts to Altair who has already slipped his new hoodie and dress pants on. "Are you aware of the fact that you snore?"
"Snore? Absolutely not." Altair says with a dismissive wave.
Ezio finally pushes his shirtless self to his feet with an exaggerated stretch of his arms. "I'm afraid you do, my friend. It's a rather hefty noise at that."
Altair raises his brow in disbelief. "At least I sleep with my clothes on."
"Sorry, but I can't be hiding this beautiful figure all the time." Ezio says with a smirk.
Connor scrunches his nose. "Are you sure you're not into men?"
"Confidence is nothing to be ashamed of, kiddo." Ezio says, patting Connor's shoulder.
The three assassins continue to banter and argue amongst themselves as Lucy, Shaun, and Rebecca join Desmond's side. Shaun casually sips a steaming cup of coffee. His free hand shoved in his skinny pants pocket. "Already arguing, eh?"
Desmond nods, wincing as he watches Connor nearly get knocked out by Altair after stumbling into him while putting his pants on. "I figured they'd get along better than this."
"The thing you need to consider is that even though they're all you, technically speaking, they're still individuals with completely different personalities." Rebecca says as she swishes her cold tea around. "It would be kinda freaky if they were exactly the same."
"And this isn't freaky?" Lucy interjects with a broad gesture towards the bickering assassins.
"Well, I'm getting used to the idea now." Rebecca shrugs.
Altair shoves his hands in his pockets and notices Shaun watching him. He narrows his dark eyes at the scientist causing Shaun to immediately break his gaze. The Arabian smirks then turns his attention to Ezio and Connor who are now huddled over a stray tablet that was lying on a low table. "What're you two gawking at?"
"Cats." Connor says.
Altair's curiosity gets the better of him and he shoves himself between… himself. Ezio and Connor were mesmerized by a compilation video of silly cats. Altair stood over them, his brow furrowed in confusion. "What is the point of this?"
"I'm not sure." Connor says analytically. "But I can't seem to look away."
"They're so precious." Ezio coos.
They're so fluffy." Connor whispers.
"They're so… creepy." Altair sneers.
"They're losing it." Lucy sighs.
After a brutal breakfast brawl, the assassins all loaded up into the van. Altair makes sure he is as far away from Shaun's magnetic fingers as possible. Desmond had told the Arabian assassin he needed to leave his weapons behind, but what Desmond didn't know is that Altair has hidden a small blade in his pocket. Just in case.
The van full of nerds and mercenaries rockets down the freeway. Desmond and the crew decided it would be a good idea to take the assassins and a small chunk of the lab to a remote location away from the hustle and bustle of the city. They hoped that it would calm the assassins's nerves. The constant fighting amongst them was entertaining at first, but it had quickly become dangerous after Rebecca nearly lost a finger at breakfast.
"Are we there yet?" Ezio groans as he slumps further down into his seat. His hood is down revealing his insanely messy hair. He desperately needs a stylist.
Altair reaches over to move a stray strand of hair out of Ezio's face. Ezio allows it mainly due to his intense desire to remain alive. Connor is not having as much fun. His stomach is doing somersaults and the young assassin is struggling to keep his pancakes down. He clutches a pillow that Lucy had handed him, burying his face in it with a muffled groan. "I hate these modern carriages."
"Easy does it guys, we're nearly there." Desmond calls from the driver's seat. "Anyone want to listen to some tunes?" He reaches for the radio and clicks the screen a few times before a bass heavy rap song blasts out the speakers.
Altair grits his teeth. He pulls his hood tight over his ears to try and block out the noise to no avail. "What is that gibberish?!"
"It's Eminem." Desmond said as he quietly sang along.
"Like the candy?" Ezio perks up. He didn't care much for the music, but he is a little more tactful in his distaste.
Shaun let out a hearty laugh from the front passenger seat, as do Lucy and Rebecca.
Ezio shifts awkwardly in his seat as their escorts continue to chuckle amongst themselves without answering his question. He leans over to Altair who has nearly folded inside out at this point and whispers. "What's so funny?"
The van comes to a stop outside an overgrown building. Very little of the metal siding was visible through the brush and vines and the only noise that can be heard is the crunch of fallen leaves under the boots of the assassins as they tumble out of the van. Connor managed to make it the whole ride without tossing his cookies, but he stood off to the side, still clutching his pillow just in case.
"You good over there, pal?" Shaun calls as he begins unloading equipment from the van.
Connor gives a half-hearted thumbs up and finally stands up straight with a sigh of relief. "I refuse to get back in that thing."
"We could always knock you out next time." Altair says plainly as he hoists a heavy bag over his shoulder.
Ezio cackles while Connor glares daggers at his Arabian counterpart. "Bold of you to assume you can knock me out."
A few hours pass and the group of misfits manage to set up their temporary lab. Ezio spends most of his time chasing off small forest creatures that had made the old building their home. Altair had helped with the heavy lifting and is now relaxing on one of the Animus beds, small pony toy in hand. He hasn't squeaked it, but the day is still young and Shaun is about to not be as occupied as he had been.
Desmond and Shaun finish dusting off an old computer setup when Connor sneaks up behind them. He has yet to abandon his pillow. "What's that for?"
"Oh, this?" Shaun points to the computer and Connor nods. "It's the machine that we plan to run the Animus off of. It's a little old so we'll need to work out any kinks it may have before risking putting anyone in it."
"You think it likes spanking?" Ezio chuckles, elbowing Altair who doesn't even crack a smile. Ezio crosses his arms and pouts. "You're no fun."
"It's not my job to be fun." Altair says as he twirls his tiny knife between his fingers.
Shaun wipes his hands off and sees the dagger dancing around in Altair's hands. "Hey! We said he couldn't have weapons."
"I'm a grown man." Altair growls. "And I needed something to protect myself from your prodding little fingerlings."
Connor snorts then hides his face in his pillow when Shaun whips around to glare at him. "I can still see you."
"No you can't."
"I didn't realize how goofy you all really were." Lucy chimes in as she sits down at her workstation and begins to type furiously.
"They're men." Rebecca adds with a sneer. She is currently tinkering with the wiring of another Animus bed on the other side of the poorly lit room.
Ezio and Altair exchange a puzzled glance then both shrug. "So what's the plan?" Altair asks as he scoots over to let Ezio sit beside him.
"The plan is we're going to go through every data file and memory sequence bit-by-bit until we can locate the glitch that brought you here." Desmond begins while he rolls up his white hoodie sleeves. "The idea is if we can find those glitches and reverse engineer their compositions, we can send you back easy peasy."
"Sounds too simple." Connor adds as he takes a spot on the other side of Altair who is suddenly feeling extremely claustrophobic.
"It's not." Lucy says from her station. "There's no guarantee what happened can even be reversed and we don't know what your being here now will do to the present timeline."
"What could happen?" Ezio inquires as he gently strokes his goatee. "To the timeline, I mean?"
Rebecca sits up from the floor, her arms and fingers covered in grease and dust. "There's no telling. Cities could collapse, people suddenly cease to exist. Whole generations could be wiped out. It's a dangerous time bomb that we don't even know is ticking."
"That's reassuring." Connor mumbles from his pillow.
"This is why we need you all to cooperate with each other." Desmond says as he crouches in front of the huddled assassins. "If you're constantly bickering and showing your asses it'll only slow things down, understand?" They all nod in unison, but remain silent.
"Good." Desmond says as he stands up straight. "Why don't you all go out and stretch your legs. We've got a lot we have to do in here before we can even think about starting."
Connor wastes no time to scale a nearby pine tree. He reaches the top and scans the vast treeline. No signs of life for miles around. Only the beauty of Mother Nature, which comforts Connor.
"Part monkey, that one." Ezio says to Altair as they watch Connor from down in a grassy field. The air is warm and smells crisp of an impending autumn. Altair crouches down and runs his fingers through the lush greenery. A half smile inches across his face that Ezio immediately latches onto. "So you do smile."
Altair straightens up quickly. "Do you know when to shut up?"
"Nope." Ezio says with a grin before marching over to Connor's tree. "Ay, Connor!"
"What?" Connor's head pokes out from top of the tree, his hood decorated with a few stray pine needles and branches. Altair strolls up to Ezio then crosses his arms over his chest.
"See anything interesting from up there?" Ezio shouts back.
"No, just trees." Connor says before disappearing again.
"How shocking." Altair groans. "What do you suggest we do with our time here?"
Ezio places his hands on his hips, kicking a rock into a rogue tree root a few feet away. "Beats me. I'm not too familiar with the concept of boredom."
"I am." Altair says.
"We know." Connor calls from the tree.
Altair clenches his fists. "You know I can climb up there too you."
Connor peeks out from under a branch. "Oh yeah?"
"Oh yeah." Altair repeats.
Suddenly Ezio perks up. "That's it! Let's have a race to see who can go the furthest and fastest through the trees."
"I'll win." Connor says matter of factly.
Ezio cracks his knuckles and saunters over to a neighboring pine, Altair following his lead. "We'll see about that."
"Careful, Ezio." Altair smirks. "I'd hate to see you scuff up those lovely baby hands of yours."
"Let's just be sure to keep clear of any lakes, eh?" Ezio jeers with a wink. Altair curses under his breath but decides to hold back on a response.
The three assassins all ready up in their trees. Connor drops lower into his tree so that he's level with his comrades. They all exchange a quick glance before locking onto the forest ahead of them. "If your feet touch the ground you're out." Ezio calls. "Let's keep this clean, no pushing, no throwing things, and no pulling on garments. Whoever reaches the small mountain at the edge of the valley first is the winner." The three assassins all nod in agreement then Ezio begins a countdown.
"One."
"Two."
Silence. The air is still, and the sun is beginning to set. Bathing the valley in a warm fiery glow.
"Three!"
The three assassins all lunge forward into the vast forest, leaving behind their new scientist friends as they race to the end of the valley.
Heyyyyy! It's been a HOT minute, y'all! I hope everyone has been faring well in their lives and to all who have continued to follow this despite my lengthy hiatus I greatly appreciate you! I'll be honest, I completely forgot the direction I originally wanted this fic to go. I've reread it and am taking it into the direction I feel it should head now and I hope it lives up to the expectations of those all eagerly awaiting this update! I plan to be as consistent as possible and keep the humor while going for a more mature plot-line and overall vibe. I can't wait to continue this adventure with everyone and I hope that this update did not disappoint! Don't forget to read and review!
Much love;
Mixxie
(Formerly known as Bumble)