I now own the whole of Disney, Fox and Nickelodeon, but Insomniac is still beyond my grasp. (Just kidding)
Three: Trial and ErrorIn the mess hall on the Enterprise, a proper court had been arranged. Captain Picard was standing behind a podium on a raised platform; Ratchet and Clank were standing behind the bar, trapped by a forcefield, and most of the senior staff and the captain of the Gunga made up the jury, sitting on chairs in the middle of the hall.
"Captain," the captain of the Gunga protested. "I really don't see why you should be the one to judge at this trial. We do not recognize your Federation, and I am perfectly capable of…"
"The prisoners have requested asylum, and this trial is analysing their request, not their crimes. If they are denied asylum, then they will be turned over to you, and you may do with them as you wish. We are willing to abide by your rules in this matter, as long as you respect ours. Now, I hereby call this trial to order. The accused, please stand."
Ratchet rose from his seat, and Clank hopped up onto the bar.
"Ratchet, Clank, how do you plead?"
"We plead innocent." Ratchet stated, simply. "We admit we traded with Slim, but we had no idea he was using stolen…"
"That's probably what he told you to say if you were caught." The Gunga captain interrupted.
"We work for Megacorp, we are on an important mission to retrieve one of its most important experiments." Ratchet continued.
"A likely story. I would imagine two highly trained Megacorp Commandos would be travelling in something better than a class-15 Faltron cruiser."
"It was all they could spare. Megacorp is a very busy company."
"Order!" Picard interrupted. "Now, captain. What is your evidence for arresting these two?" The Gunga captain rose from his seat.
"The robot, I suspect is innocent. He has probably been programmed to go along with this character. Ratchet, however…"
Picard's commbadge chirruped. He held up his hand to stop the captain and tapped it.
"Picard here."
"Sir," Ensign Burke's voice floated over the comm channel. "A large ship has just arrived in the area, and is demanding to know what we have done with their spacecraft. The captain's name is Abercrombie Fizzwidget."
"That's him!" Ratchet cried. "He'll explain everything. He's the chairman of Megacorp, and the one who hired us to get the experiment back."
"Put him through down here." Picard ordered, and turned to a screen on the wall of the mess hall. An image of an old, large man dressed in a blue suit with a large letter M on his bow tie.
"My name is Abercrombie Fizzwidget, and I demand to know what you have done with our ship."
"Mr Fizzwidget, sir." The Gunga captain stood up and snapped to attention immediately.
"This man has arrested us on the charges of criminal activities." Ratchet explained. "I assure you, this is not true."
"I have been in continuous contact with Mr Cognito, and he has explanatoried everything. He has been a invaluable asset to Megacorp in the past years, so we hereby clear him of all charges."
"Mr Fizzwidget," The Gunga captain protested. "He has been known to be involved in criminal activities. He has dealt with illegal weaponry, ship upgrades…" A stern look from Mr Fizzwidget shut him up.
"As the charges from Mr Cognito have been released, I believe the charges against Ratchet and Clank are instratified. I demand their safe return and that of any property you have confisclilated."
"Mr Fizzwidget," Clank spoke up. "We have requested asylum with these people, and we believe they are able to help us, as they have much superior weaponry."
"I'm afraid not." Picard said. "Our Prime Directive forbids us to interfere with any affairs of other cultures, space-faring or not."
"We would be infinitively gratified if you would lend your invaluable assistance in our predicament." Fizzwidget cut in. "We would give you anything you desire, as long as it is within the boundarials of our business corporation."
"No," Picard said sternly. "Our laws are quite clear on that matter."
"Could you at least give us a small ship, seeing as ours was destroyed?" Ratchet asked.
"We can give you a shuttlecraft, but we will have to extract any Federation technology." Riker replied. "Don't worry, it'll still reach impulse, and you'll be able to defend yourselves."
"Thank you." Clank turned to Fizzwidget. "I believe everything is in order. We are just on our way to the Thugs for Less Asteroid base; we believe that is where the criminal is meeting with them.
"Excellent, I'll leave you two gentlemen to it." Fizzwidget reached for a control on his ship.
"Um, Mr Fizzwidget," Ratchet cut in. "We could use your help."
"Oh, I'm sorry boys, but I, er, have an important business meeting to go to. Some people on Endako don't think our technology trade is at a fair price." Fizzwidget disappeared off the screen.
"Well then, as you have been cleared of all charges, I believe this trial is over." Picard stepped of the podium, and the jury stood up and left. Riker released Ratchet and Clank from the bar. The Gunga Captain shot Picard a nasty look, but left. Ratchet turned to Picard.
"Captain, if you don't mind, we would like to see our ship now, we are in a bit of a hurry. The criminal we are after has stolen a top-secret experiment from Megacorp, and we need to find him as quickly as possible."
"It will take some time to extract the technology from the shuttlecraft, but we can take you to the base. In the meantime, you are welcome to enjoy our hospitality. Mr Data,"
Data, who was about to leave, paused and turned to look at Picard.
"I would like you to give our guests a tour of the ship. I'm sure they will be interested to see the technology on our ship. Just don't let them see Engineering or weaponry."
Data nodded, and ushered Ratchet and Clank out the door.
"So, I heard you gave Slim some holographic technology. It seems a lot more advanced than our holograms." Ratchet said.
"Yes," Data replied. "This ship has numerous Holodecks, and can produce environments, characters, and various other things. Here," Data paused outside some large doors. "This is one. Computer, run Data program 3"
"Program ready." The Computer replied. "Enter when ready." Data walked through the doors as they opened, and Ratchet and Clank followed him. Ratchet stood in the doorway, amazed at the sight he saw. It was a large office, filled with bookcases, desks, all which seemed to hold various bits of notepaper, and strange beakers of liquids.
"This is a program of a famous Earth character, Sherlock Holmes." Data explained. "He is a detective who solves various mysteries, mostly murders, using amazing powers of logic and deduction."
"This… how did you do it?" Ratchet breathed.
"It is quite simple really," Clank cut in. "I have seen this technology once on Pologratis III. They use particles of matter stored in buffers, and move them around to recreate…"
"Okay, maybe I don't want to know."
There was a knock on the office door. Data quickly grabbed a hat and dressing gown from one of the tables and put them on, and stuffed a pipe in his mouth.
"Come." He said. The door opened, and three men entered, holding rather large pistols.
"The game's up, Holmes." The smaller one hissed. "I know what you did to my wife, and you're not going to get away with it." Ratchet reached behind his back, but the largest thug pointed his gun at him.
"What's this? Did you teach your cat to stand up and wear clothes?"
"Just shoot it." The other one urged. "It's only a kitty."
The thug fired his gun… and the bullet went straight through Ratchet.
"Whoa! That's freaky!" The thug stumbled backwards. Ratchet drew his gun, and fired some energy blasts at the thug. He vaporised.
"Warning. Weapons fire in Holodeck 2." The computer rang out. The doors opened, and three security officers burst in, pointing their phasers at Ratchet. He raised his gun.
"Stop!" Data jumped in between them. "It was a misunderstanding. He was trying to shoot a Holodeck character.
"Who're these guys?" The thug began to point his gun at the officers. Data pressed a control panel, and the figures faded and disappeared. Ratchet holstered his weapon.
"Sorry." He said, sheepishly. Data's commbadge chirped.
"Data, what the hell is going on down there?" Picard's voice rang out.
"A misunderstanding in the Holodeck, sir. Ratchet though one of the characters was real." Data explained.
"I'm afraid we'll need your weapon." One of the security officers said to Ratchet.
"What, all of them? Okay." Ratchet began to take out his weapons. Eventually, there was a large pile on the floor.
"Uh… do you really need all those?" Another security guard asked.
"It's a dangerous Galaxy." Ratchet replied.
"You must need a tremendous amount of energy for a portable buffer that can hold that amount of weapons." Data remarked.
"Oh, this? That's nothing. I've still got my gadgets, uniforms, boots…"
"What he means," Clank hastily cut in. "Is that he has many more gadgets, but none of them could be used to harm people. They are simply for removing or getting past obstacles."
"Mr Data to the bridge." Picard's voice rang out again. "Ratchet and Clank, I think you'd better come too."
"This should be interesting." Ratchet walked out the door, followed by Data and Clank.