Tornadoes For Sighs
-Chapter 6-
Senile Predictions
TATSUMAKI, FOR THE FIRST TIME, ACKNOWLEDGED SHE WAS A WIZARD OF LONELINESS.
Tatsumaki hated pets. She didn't like people and her family was just… ew. It's a wonder that Tatsumaki has a job with the stuff she pulled. Tatsumaki had anger issues and not to mention she didn't have any practical skills aside from murdering monsters.
And that's boring now. Fuck!
On top of that, another Fubuki Friday was skipped by the famous Fubuki. This was the third week of Fubuki missing out on their afternoon practice. Fubuki didn't want to practice.
The next day, Tatsumaki killed monsters from 7 a.m to 4 p.m. It was a good work out. The monsters were bland and easy so she killed them until her clothes were drenched in red filth. Tatsumaki looked like a cattle murderer and she terrified anyone who approached her. Including the monsters.
Tatsumaki came home, watered her apple tree and settled onto the couch (changed into her bunny pyjamas). The house was empty and she never came here unless she was exhausted.
Tatsumaki was bored. Did no one want to hang out with her? She rolled onto her stomach, pointing at the sky with her remote. There were no more monsters to kill, no more people to comfort, no more anything.
The TV was a good distraction.
On the Disaster Channel, Pig God's ugly face kept on playing. It wasn't oftentimes Pig God was praised. A reporter kept blabbing about one thing; Pig God protecting orphans. It made Tatsumaki open her eyes.
What black magic was that? Tatsumaki felt… like patting Pig God on his back… or rolls. Shudder. Would it be like touching a mattress? Double shudder.
Tatsumaki had the glory of invincibility. Pig God had the glory of a stomach.
Pig God ate one seafolk when trying out City Z's seafood. Being close to the sea, the ocean carried some monsters into the streets from the waves. Pig God protected an orphanage and Tatsumaki appreciated him, though he literally ate a monster. Gross!
Tatsumaki knew he had places to go, people to eat. Money had no substantial meaning to him and burgers had value.
Tatsumaki went to City A's raunchiest burger joint, Burgers, Burgers & Burgers. It was popular with bacon burgers and large drinks. Tatsumaki guessed she could get him burgers, then he would be thanked. This was the only time she acknowledged Pig God.
The proportions were idiotic and Tatsumaki ordered fourteen burgers. Anything less for Pig God would be make him starve. Pig God usually got twenty at a time but Tatsumaki thought that was extreme. Did he have no shame?
Tatsumaki trusted the website had accurate information about Pig God's tastes. If Pig God throws up, the world would drown in his violently strong and corrosive stomach acid.
At the counter, the cashier looked unimpressed. She was a slender teen of seventeen, bored and nonchalant with gum popping in her mouth. She was very intent on seeing Tatsumaki's order through.
"So. You're going to eat this all yourself?" The cashier asked, whistling at the bill and burgers.
"No. I know someone who would," Tatsumaki grumbled. Damn Pig God's elastic face.
"Look, little lady, I'm not judging. Sometimes I could see people's spines. I think everyone should eat what they want." The cashier teen rambled. "You're brave."
Whatever. "Put extra tartar sauce on the burgers. I'll pay some more." Tatsumaki waved her debit card.
"Oh. You like tartar sauce?"
Sunglasses hid Tatsumaki's disgusted expression. Why was this cashier making small talk?!
"No. I hate fish. I always had." Tatsumaki said dismissively. "A colleague has a stomach with battery acid. He loves fish. I also hate questions."
The cashier left Tatsumaki alone as she floated humbly, like some lonely island in a plain black v-neck shirt with skinny jeans. Her hair was swept back with a scarf. She wasn't doing hero work now and Fubuki liked shopping with her on the third Friday of the month after practice.
Tatsumaki's womanly heels made her legs look long. Many people questioned if she were old enough to have a debit card. Don't get her started on going to bars and going to the gynecologist. It's hard being small with a youthful hair colour. Her green hair made people mercilessly tease her in high school with never-ending comments.
She's happy no one knew who she was. She ignored the articles and messages in her inbox sent by Bearded Worker. He was so intent on meeting her. She's been ducking the press and the internet for the past few days. All she did damage her reputation because she went berserk on that scientist for no reason.
"So," A creamy, velvet male voice said invitingly. "Princess, wanna head back to my castle?"
Ah. Another pedophile. Time to rip out his tongue.
"Oh, stranger, I'm a princess but I'll slay you like I'm killing a dragon—" Tatsumaki looked over to serve her prey a nice slice of get the fuck away and there it was.
Amai Mask. Amai Mask had a tight smile, lips pressed down with handsome curves. Fuck. Now's she pushed her line of luck. Not that she's ever been lucky. Everyone was quiet as they bathed in the starlight he offered those obedient insects.
"So. It's you again," Tatsumaki grimaced, voice flat with disappointment. "The eleventh plague released to the world. How did you fit your ego through the door?"
"Same way yours did." Amai Mask purred.
Amai Mask met Tatsumaki's glare with a smile. Amai Mask was the complete opposite of Pig God. Pig God was so monstrous-looking but completely caring and kind.
"Here's your order—" The cashier paused in folding up the burger's bag to give to Tatsumaki. The woman recoiled in shock, the bag close to her heart.
Double fuck.
The cashier gasped like all the air in the world vanished. Her eyes caught fire with ardour. "Hey! You're Amai Mask from Love Story Beauty! I rated it 100%. I-I love you!"
"I love all my fans. Be sure to be on the lookout for the sequel coming out this autumn. I will personally give you a chance to rate it more than a 100 percent." Amai Mask hummed in a breezy tone.
"It's done! I use your face mask. My cheeks are so soft." She slapped her cheeks, so spellbound.
Amai Mask nodded, a purr of lust and smooth things whistling a tune into everyone's ears.
"I only offer the best to my fans when aid is needed, in the bedroom, on the screen. Wherever. My autumn skincare line will be released. With two purchases, you have the chance to see me on the red carpet. There's a draw."
"I will so totally, totally be there and buy everything!" The cashier teen squealed.
"Oh. We're going to eat, let me take that for you." Amai Mask reached for the bag, a successful arrogance on his face.
"Uh. This is her order." The cashier snatched up the bag before Amai Mask could lay claim.
Ah! Tatsumaki rejoiced. Kind of. The girl was doing her job right!
Amai Mask produced the equivalent to gold in front of the teen. "Here are two VIP tickets to my next concert," he whispered sweetly. "Of course you are a fan."
He gave her two golden tickets, flashy, classy— everything he was. The cashier had a mini-panic attack and jumped around, teary-eyed. None of her co-workers thought the wiser.
Tatsumaki despised being a teenager and she hated other teenagers, so her dislike wasn't anything new.
The teenage girl was so excited! Then the bubble popped and she came back to reality. The teen shrieked at her dark grease-smelling uniform. "I can't go like this! I have to get clean! I'm sorry you had to see me like this—"
"Here a thought, honey," Amai Mask didn't indeed flinch. "To me, you look perfect. All your skin."
"Oh. I understand you." she nodded, voice all soft. "Of course you'd say something like that and mean it. You're my hero."
Amai Mask and the cashier were drawn in this disgustingly tender moment of self-awareness and flashy words while Tatsumaki hissed at him.
"Here's a thought, girlie, why not just think maybe he's average for pete's sake? And average people SHOULDN'T give out concert tickets to fragile teen girls. You could do so much better! They might be suspicious." Tatsumaki glared at Amai Mask. "Extra suspicious!"
"Average?" Amai Mask repeated, eyes smartening. "That wounds me."
The teen hissed at Tatsumaki. "It's Amai Mask, he could never be suspicious. And what's your problem?" The teen demanded, her voice high and curious.
Amai Mask smirked. "Yeah, Princess, what is your problem?"
"You," Tatsumaki looked pain as her voice climbed in volume. "You're damn—"
"Princess, that isn't how you speak to people. Do we need to discuss this in the car? We have a long drive to do." he charmed a threat to sound teasing and reprimanding. "Fans need respect. The heroes do have consequences."
He was going to drive her around? She wanted to run. Ignoring her problems was strange for her but she didn't mind at the moment. She found it easier to strike than to run.
Amai Mask winked to the growling Tatsumaki. "Hey, this is my friend. Forgive her."
"You're forgiven." The cashier whipped to Tatsumaki. "Oh my god! You are so lucky. He's on the hero rank association! He's so perfect and great and he makes your skin shine. He's literally a god."
He gave a smug look to Tatsumaki. "A god? I wouldn't say that."
"You totally are! You were ranked the number one hero in the popularity polls for twenty-eight weeks straight! I voted for you!" The cashier cooed, heart eyes growing infinitely wider.
"I cherish your continued support." Amai Mask observed Tatsumaki gritting her teeth. "Fans do allow friends to share burgers together. Don't they? Especially my fans. They're supreme."
"Yeah! Of course! Here are your burgers. Have a nice brunch. Come again." The cashier smiled.
"Yeah. I'll have a great time with my princess," he smiled, getting her bag of food and continuing to the door.
"Your princess?" Tatsumaki echoed.
"I said what I said." he stopped. "You coming?"
"Go to hell." Tatsumaki hissed.
"I like hot showers anyway," he laughed. "Let's go."
"Oh my god, he's so beautiful!" The cashier gasped.
"Oh. Really?" Tatsumaki drily turned away. "He's so plain, I didn't notice a thing when he came into the restaurant."
The sun in his eyes suddenly waned, leaving a blood-red moon. Amai Mask successfully gave her a dark look. "Let's go to lunch, Princess. I'm hungry… for answers."
"Starve," Tatsumaki keened. "Just starve and leave me alone."
"You know I can't do that…" he whispered. He waved to everyone, charming them with eyes.
They cooed.
Why was everyone emotionally attached to this glittering guy? Why couldn't teenagers think with their brains rather than their impressionable hearts? And damn Amai Mask for capitalizing on this fact.
Tatsumaki rubbed her temples. Pretty boys with awful personalities and immense powers were the bane of her existence.
They got into his car.
Wearing her sunglasses made the scene darker, which wasn't preferable. She felt like some crow on a tight wire, falling deeper into this conversation made her uneasy. The more she spoke, the higher the bar was raised.
Amai Mask was probably going to eat Tatsumaki alive. Amai Mask will literally tear Tatsumaki apart as his chauffeur cruised across the city.
Amai Mask's car— no, the limousine was leather, smelling like upscale sleek cologne and masculine musk. The seats felt like clouds beside the tinted windows. No one could witness it if he killed her. Tatsumaki was sure that he'd be pissed about blood getting into his bourbon drink tray.
Argh. His biceps could level cities. Nice world, been good knowing it.
She could smell his cologne. Damn! This! World!
Amai Mask watched her with a certain fascination, calculations and sorcery dancing in his stable beauty. Amai Mask cushioned a slender, pointed chin on his hand.
"Will you give me sweet dreams tonight?" he asked sweetly.
"No. I'd rather you die after the nightmare I give," Tatsumaki said calmly. "I never sacrifice anything to God. Those who pray on the weak and minor. Like a certain Romeo I know."
Amai Mask sat up taller, asserting himself into the situation. "Such a spitfire tongue. I don't have time for your insults and jokes. Coming from me, a friend." The last words had knives in them. "I invite you to sit closer and have an open conversation."
Open? This was incredibly one-sided.
"So. We're friends? All I know is that you boss around Bearded Worker when his beard could kick your ass." she rolled her eyes.
"You and Bearded Worker are acquainted with me, as per usual with all S-Class heroes."
Tatsumaki held up five fingers. "Oh, then five of your two friends don't like you. Boohoo." Tatsumaki looked out the dark window, though she couldn't see outside. "You know, bosses shouldn't lecture young women on their days off."
Amai Mask rolled down the window, the breeze tousling his hair. "The smell of those burgers make me retch. Do you buy these burgers? Burgers have too much salt and not to mention they make your skin break out. Your pure skin would be marred by the presence of pimples."
Tatsumaki stiffened. She scraped up every nerve she's accumulated over the years to keep the iron in her expression.
Amai Mask held her damn burgers hostage and rolled down the window to toss it. "Discarding it will be best." he dismissed.
"Discard those burgers and I'll discard your fingers, Romeo," she warned. "Go on. I dare you."
For a moment, the air was heavy. It had a hectopascal weight on them.
Amai Mask finally laughed, entertained. "Princess, you were always curious. You could always take a lunch day with me. I'll show you real cuisine with discipline."
"Aw. Do you think I would eat something that you've touched? How sweet to offer."
"Hey, hey." His shadowed eyes were claret and dangerous as he pointed his face her way. "I ain't that sweet."
His voice was uneven now and he was… less beautiful.
"My, my Romeo, you don't like me anymore, am I not your rose?" Tatsumaki rolled her eyes.
"I don't like evil, annoying interviewers and irresponsible heroes. Can you guess which category you belong to?" he quizzed.
Tatsumaki shrugged, a candied smile on her face. "Beats me. Are you implying that I want something other than your happiness? I am positive to your life."
He crinkled his nose in irritation. "You keep on testing the association with your big-lunged words and utter destruction. You and I were meant to speak. You and I were supposed to make a change in your appearance and your reputation."
"My reputation. What do I care about it?" she yelled fitfully.
"You care a lot about it." Amai Mask looked at her, simmering with anger. "You assaulted that scientist. You almost decimated City F. It's one press disaster after another. You embarrass the association. I want you to reform yourself."
"Don't talk about my situation when you know nothing!"
"The ways your past disrespects you is crippling but you do not have to attack scientists."
Tatsumaki's frustration flared. "I don't need your greater narrative. Don't lecture me, either."
"Tch. Looking at you is hard when you're like this." he hissed. "Tatsumaki, you're not the only one who has bad experiences with organizations who specialize," he said loudly. "There are 17 S-Class, 38 A-Class, 101 B-Class and 390 C-Class but only one you. You have a certain pull in the community. People look up at you but you're diminishing my trust in whether you should be so highly trusted. You should retain a sense of professionalism."
"There are 500 or more heroes. I only care about the strong. There are only 1 percent of the people I care within that number." Tatsumaki turned away.
"Five people?" he asked.
"Fubuki, Bearded Worker, me, myself and I qualify as those I go out of my way to understand or seek. The rest of you are conniving, slow ladder climbers." she looked at Amai Mask's gold eyes. "And you want me as the feminine icon of the association. You're a surgeon of darkness and you can't heal the association's view of me. Give up."
"Keep yourself in check," he said. "I want you to keep the company safe. No one has sued us but City F's representatives are more hesitant to come to the year-end dinner. They are more hesitant to donate."
"I don't care about checks, money or reputation but if you care about it. I won't kill anyone. Everyone will be safe with me. I protect everyone, parasite or the strong alike." she announced. "Don't judge my abilities to save. Don't get in my way, either."
"Your appearance is salvageable, however, you must go on a campaign to become a sweetheart of society."
"Hey. Romeo, what do you care about me being in City Z? I have to help them. Besides, Bearded Worker doesn't mind." she stated squarely. "I claimed the city. Did you know that with my claiming of the city, anyone you send in will get torn apart, limb for limb."
"I don't appreciate your words and threats."
"I don't appreciate weaklings who don't listen." she shot back. "Tch. Don't make me set examples or test people. I am a hard marker and I don't like to be questioned, Amai Mask."
They peered at each other then he sighed. "Ah. I guess I will have good dreams, Princess." he beamed. "Now that it's settled, let us go to a restaurant. We're going to go to the headquarters."
"Hey, Romeo," Tatsumaki ultimately settled on the chair. "If you don't drop me at HQ, I will summon a storm and you will taste lightning. Sincerely."
He promptly left her at the entrance of HQ. He couldn't even stand a little bit of rain in his hair where sunlight broke through.
###
Amai Mask's talk was less antagonistic than she believed it would be but that didn't mean she wasn't completely hostile. Walking down the wide, dark halls of the association was a relief. She used to linger here, waiting for a job. She pretended she was allergic to the sunlight until she got something to massacre.
Now she avoided HQ as much as humanly possible. She avoided Bearded Worker but he knew where she was. He probably sprinting from his office. He must've heard she was in the building, arriving in Amai Mask's car. He wanted to greet Amai Mask.
Seeing his suit flapping around, Tatsumaki realized that maybe Bearded Worker wasn't fit to run. He panted with a sheen of sweat as he stopped in front of her.
"Run a couple of times a weak, you look pathetic," Tatsumaki ordered. He looked like he was about to fall over.
He rested hands on his knees. "Hagn, Tornado of Terror-sama… I am an office worker. I can't… ha, ha, can't run that fast."
"Still pathetic." Tatsumaki rolled her eyes. "Catch."
He did, surprisingly. He looked offended. "You know I'm vegetarian," he said forlornly after looking inside of the bag.
Tatsumaki clicked her tongue. "Give it to Pig God. This is payment for dealing with City Z that one time."
Bearded Worker opened his mouth, then closed it. "So you're thanking him? Wow, Tornado of Terror— that's so nice." he swallowed and checked the burgers like a bomb threat. "There's… There's nothing wrong with them, right?"
Tatsumaki balled her fists. "How DARE you insinuate that, idiot? Idiot! I acknowledge the strong. Pig God wasn't a greedy parasite for once and he did something. That's so rude. I am so kind, so kind and you spit on this—"
"I am sorry. You are kind! Kinder than anyone I've met." he apologized.
"If you'd like, I'd even make you burgers," she said, miffed.
"I kind of like my stomach where it is."
Tatsumaki glared. "Do you like where your head is too, eh, smartass?"
He avoided her gaze then tilted his head. "There are… 14 buns?"
Tatsumaki clapped loudly. "You can do math without pen and paper."
Bearded Worker ignored that last comment, looking at the burgers with a sort of amazed disgust. "That won't satisfy him. Did you know that he once ate 50 seafolk without leaving a trace?"
"Did you know that a million people just threw up in their mouths?" Tatsumaki shuddered. Why does he have to eat his damn enemies! It's gross! "He should get in shape."
"Round is a shape." Bearded Worker pointed out.
"He's still super huge!" Tatsumaki rolled her eyes. "Be grateful I acknowledged someone on a weaker rank than me. It's clemency. I would rather twist my enemy's spine than poison them. It's not my M.O. Tornadoes don't use poison."
"You are the terror of a tornado… I didn't need to know that part," he almost belched.
Tatsumaki giggled at the curve of his set jawline. "You're sheltered. Not even you should be shiny and wrapped like a package of cookies."
"Are you always like this?" Bearded Worker had another sigh in his caramel voice. His molars were blinking. It was a sign to run.
Tatsumaki waved him away. "I don't have time for this conversation anymore. I'm out of town."
He scrunched his expression up, looking scruffy and annoyed. "But you're right here."
She ignored him, aching to get home. "Wish me luck on my trip. Peace," she told him. "I'll give you a postcard. Your beard must have a great signature when you sign it."
"Tornado of Terror—"
Just then, a whoosh of air almost knocked her off her feet. She had enough sense to hold onto the scarf holding her hair in place. Only one dick head would do that in this building and not grovel. Flashy Flash was fast, faster than she could follow. It was quite unsettling just how much advantage he had when using his speed.
Even now, she glared at his long, silky blonde hair cascading over his white cape. He wore a black spandex suit with an oversized belt buckle. His hairpins annoyed her. He was a boy! How was his hair so luscious? It made her jealous but so annoyed.
"Hairpin, the next time you come here to flip your hair like that in here, I swear to fuck that I will cut it ALL OFF!" Tatsumaki shouted, fixing her wind-blown hair.
Flashy Flash focused on Tatsumaki, overlooking her provocation. He glared at Bearded Worker. "Why'd you send in Tornado of Terror to that mission? I claimed it." he groused.
Sobering a bit, Tatsumaki flew to him, smug and happy. "I just finish the job better." she stuck out her tongue. "Wouldn't Bearded Worker want the job done quickly? For a guy named Flashy Flash, you're pretty slow to do the job." she jeered.
He prided himself on being the fastest hero in S-Class but was he? He was fast but he was weak.
He jerked back as if she gave him an electric shock. "I am faster than you, Tornado of Terror! Don't insinuate anything else. You leave so many piles of debris and messes. There's nothing sophisticated about terrorizing the citizens."
Bearded Worker put Tatsumaki behind her. "Hey, S-Class, let's not fight in the middle of the hallway. There's a reason why S-Class heroes are forbidden from interacting in a battle-filled or aggressive way. Cities suffer. Especially non-heroes like me."
"Bearded Worker, you never have any shortage of killed prey and monsters when I'm on your side." Tatsumaki turned to Bearded Worker. "Don't you like that? I'm just better than him, right?"
"Bearded Worker, why do you put up with this? Tornado of Terror is just arrogant."
"Am I arrogant or am I right?" Tatsumaki snarled.
"She's going to kill everyone. Follow that logic up the chain." Flashy Flash yelled. "She's like an aggressive lion with no social skills."
"Hairpin, lions reek of ammonia. I smell of greatness and apple cider," Tatsumaki yelled back. "You follow your fucking logic up the chain, footstool! Who cares if I'm not social, I get the job done before you."
He laughed. "You should have a far humbler view of what you can do and what you should do."
"I don't need to be humble. Besides, I'm in pursuit of precision. If I left that job up to you, you might have not killed the monster. You get knocked out, constantly, and everyone was counting on a strong, fast hero to calm the situation. You'd have to call a bunch of A-Class heroes and you'd lose points!" Tatsumaki ranted.
"I don't care about points. You don't give heed to its superficial meaning. All I care for is training to become strong." he snapped.
"The naturally gifted don't need to train. You disgust me!"
"Then you are neither outstanding nor gifted if your training is lacking. Your mind tricks don't have any effect on those with a blade." he turned away from her scornful expression. "People from my ninja village were sworn to act with humility and nobility when confronting those like you."
"Those like me? You mean winners?" Tatsumaki grinned. "How would I know anything the good ninjas of your village would say anything about that if they're ALL M.I.A? They probably ran away from you because of your hideous personality."
"You're going through the greatest lucky streak of your life. The association likes to put you on a pedestal but pedestals can be cut down," he warned. "Amongst the shrines, rice paddies and dirt roads… I remember having an Esper or two in my village."
Tatsumaki blew air through her teeth. "They can't hold a candle to me. What happened to them? We should all hate you together." she asked with hope. She wanted to know if Alis Association had a hold on them. She hated how he kept her in suspense.
"Ah. I killed them. All of them," he said, words balancing on the blade of the knife.
Huh? Tatsumaki ignored the trip in her heart, beating a crescendo. What the hell happened in his damn village? Being beside him felt a lot more reckless than it did before. She should ditch the situation now that she's gotten what she wanted.
"You're mad because I'm right," Tatsumaki said. He couldn't have done that, right? "You shouldn't try to be a con all the time. If I were you, I'd not leave my vanity mirror at all."
Flashy Flash gave her the most peaceful smile. Like the moment all to quiet before the tragedy and walked away.
"Come back here and tell—"
Bearded Worker held her back.
Tatsumaki paused, jerking away and shaking her head. "That's the second time you've touched me without consent."
"I treat you all equally but Flashy Flash has a justice rating of five, the lowest of all S-Class heroes. It's in his nature to be strong but not to do what is right for the masses. Do what you will with that." Bearded Worker informed her.
Bearded Worker, in his own way, was telling her to yield. Normally, if she yielded to power, she wouldn't have been that much of an S-Class champion. This time, she stepped back and watched Flashy Flash's billowing cape turn red in the dim light.
Tatsumaki peered at Bearded Worker. "Why was he allowed to be a hero?" she asked, a sick feeling in her stomach.
"What made you become a hero," he answered mysteriously then pushed her to write reports of all those who she's killed.
Bearded Worker pestered her about the scientist's attack and she explained that he was testing on children. Tatsumaki had him agree to cover up the incident. How? He said Amai Mask would take care of it.
For the rest of the day, Tatsumaki pestered Bearded Worker while Flashy Flash glared at her. The evening was spent in conflict, killing and killing in boredom.
Tatsumaki concluded that Flashy Flash was just some self-important twenty-five-year-old. A misfit of the violent species but Flashy Flash probably killed everyone… With Mumen Rider telling her off and saying that the company was rotten. Tatsumaki wasn't sure if she could defend it. How did Flashy Flash become a hero… if he killed people…
Was she a good hero? They became heroes for the same reason.
Bearded Worker wanted to escort her to the lobby but they slow-walked through the halls. He was busy on his phone.
Tatsumaki was busy with thoughts. She noticed the interesting amount of guards shuffling down the hallway at a snail's pace. She didn't know what the fuss is about.
Then Tatsumaki saw the big deal. It was Lady Shibabawa.
Lady Shibabawa was a small, spindly lady with gunmetal hair, wrinkles on her narrow, leathery face. She was forever pointing with claw-like black nails. She appeared on television shows as a popular, respected fortune teller. However, Lady Shibabawa was given special treatment because she predicted large national disasters.
With an accuracy of 100%, Lady Shibabawa predicted the appearance of earthquakes and terrible monsters.
Lady Shibabawa also, for some reason, really took a liking to Tatsumaki. Kids hated Tatsumaki and the elderly did too. Yet Lady Shibabawa's thin eyebrows quirked up and she pointed a long, gnarled finger at Tatsumaki.
Lady Shibabawa was old, deeply wise and had some tired sadness. "My darling Tatsumaki-chan," Lady Shibabawa called out, voice croaky and excited. "It's you."
Oh no! There's no escape. Tatsumaki felt small and misbehaved around Lady Shibabawa. The old woman looked at Tatsumaki like she knew Tatsumaki's secrets. And she called Tatsumaki her grandchild. Lady Shibabawa was notorious for disliking heroes. Except for Tatsumaki.
Bearded Worker pushed Tatsumaki all the way to Lady Shibabawa. The woman nodded, lifting an arm to Tatsumaki. Tatsumaki dipped her head, as most people did, and let the woman pat her head.
"Lady Shibabawa… hello," Tatsumaki spoke meekly.
"Oh! You're so cute when you're shy, my grandchild," she said loudly. "You haven't been eating well, I see."
"I eat enough, Lady Shibabawa." she protested softly. "There haven't been good restaurants in City A. And you know I can't cook."
"Come eat with me in City G. We have the best crab. You don't like eating chicken or beef. " Lady Shibabawa said with a twinkly expression. "Come eat with my grandson. It will be a feast."
"I couldn't. You're busy! And there have been so many attacks and… and it's okay." Tatsumaki rambled. "And I wouldn't be able to bring anything good."
Lady Shibabawa's kind eyes narrowed. "Oh my show, Love Fortune!, you see recipes for you younguns in between commercials. Always eating ramen and oranges. We want you guys to eat well and good since you're all concerned with pictures and your interviews… At my show Love Fortune on channel 37, we fill young one's hearts with the future of love and their stomachs. You need to take care of yourself, Tatsumaki-chan."
"Ah. I will." she nodded. "I'll watch the show when I have time."
Tatsumaki was about to bow out since she didn't know what to say. Whenever Lady Shibabawa spoke, it had a purpose. Tatsumaki couldn't just stand here, with all these idiots watching. Bearded Worker sensed her unease and stepped forward.
Lady Shibabawa didn't have any of that. She suddenly grabbed Tatsumaki's hand. "I'm happy to see you because I saw this fortune yesterday. I saw how you would be in love with the strongest man in the world."
Blast? Tatsumaki will be in love with Blast? She will get a future with Blast? He's been gone for eighteen years and she hasn't seen them for so long. She had a chance? An entire world opened up.
"Are you serious?" Tatsumaki shrieked. "You cannot be joking with me."
"I'm too old to joke. One cough could end me." Lady Shibabawa said honestly with a hint of jubilance. "It will."
Everyone gasped in horror. Tatsumaki didn't like to hear those types of jokes from old people. It's scary.
"Don't say things like that!" Tatsumaki hissed then softened her voice. "It scares people."
Lady Shibabawa patted Tatsumaki's hand. "All good things come to an end. I'll pass on the torch. Death isn't scary." she whispered, all sage. "I'm always gasping, gasping but somehow still alive."
Tatsumaki frowned. "You shouldn't be moving around if you feel like that," Tatsumaki said quietly.
"Huh? Are you calling me old?" Lady Shibabawa demanded.
Tatsumaki froze. What could she say to that? Everyone got so uncomfortable, squeaking and looking at one another for help. Tatsumaki gave Bearded Worker a pointed look like, what do I do?
Lady Shibabawa laughed loudly, mocking and teasing. It disarmed Tatsumaki. Any time the woman was disconcerted, she could literally have a heart attack.
"I'm just kidding, child. Kidding. City G gets stuffy. An old ox like me needs to run around, see the sights and report if there will be any huge disasters in the upcoming months. The Association relies on me to keep them safe." Lady Shibabawa looked at Tatsumaki. "You too. You've been doing good work."
Tatsumaki's childish heart glowed at the compliment. Something about getting a compliment from an older person, after all, that they've done and seen, is very rewarding.
Tatsumaki nodded. "I will be more diligent," Tatsumaki promised.
"You work too much, though." Lady Shibabawa looked over at one of her personal escorts. "Get her my tea that helps with wrinkles."
The escort nodded and left.
"Wait! I don't have them," Tatsumaki held her face. "Right?"
Lady Shibabawa patted her forehead as if blessing Tatsumaki. "Not yet. Kind women shouldn't trouble themselves with saving the world."
"How do I trust the other idiots? It'd be best to leave the work to you and me, the true professionals." Tatsumaki said.
"In front of me, you are so kind. It's not often others let an old woman talk and ramble. An old soul l needs a listener. We don't always tell the same stories. We also spoil the ones who stay."
"I don't care for gifts. Just your insight is enough," Tatsumaki smiled, genuinely pleased by the old woman.
"You are adorable!" Lady Shibabawa crooned. "Child, why are you so unkind when you can smile like that at me?"
All of the other escorts and men looked at Lady Shibabawa curiously. Lady Shibabawa glared at them. "What are you all still doing here? Listening in to my conversation. You show a woman of my age disrespect? Leave."
Like rats, they all scattered away, even Bearded Worker. They surrounded them and weighed her down but now she felt liberated of their eyes. Lady Shibabawa had so much power and control. Tatsumaki wanted to be badass at Lady Shibabawa's age. Hm. Alive too.
"Thank you," Tatsumaki said, fueling the desire to have the same respect from people.
"You musn't hide your good, good heart from everyone. Especially that strong fiance of yours. The strongest man in the world is waiting." Lady Shibabawa said, a bit coldly. "You can't have walls up forever."
"Ah. My walls aren't… He's… He's…" Tatsumaki stammered, Dr. Gray's face flashing in her mind. "He's not really my, er, you know. Truly."
Dr. Gray's rumours reached Lady Shibabawa, too? Damn. Now she felt shame. The only reason why this was happening was because of that proposal from Lover Boy and now everyone knew.
Tatsumaki was taunted by this.
Lady Shibabawa laughed. "Why didn't you tell me? Did you think this old girl couldn't help you with romance? I used to be reeling in the men left and right." she winked. "They loved me and you should tell me everything. I'm not getting any younger."
"Lady Shibabawa… I didn't—"
"Ah. It's okay. Most people are too nebulous for you. However, you are prime for marriage and children. You're a bit slim but nothing like pelvis—"
Tatsumaki face burned. "Children aren't in my view right now! We're in a catastrophe and I am not with the strongest man in the world. Dr. Gray likes shopping and cheese way too much," Tatsumaki bristled then reeled back. "He's quite dense. He really isn't the strongest man in the world."
"Oh." Lady Shibabawa said, disappointed. "My predictions are never wrong. That is what I pride myself on as a seer."
"Well, who did you say was the strongest man in the world?"
Lady Shibabawa tapped her chin, waving her staff. "Isn't his name Saitama?" she said wonderingly. "We discussed this on Channel 37. We didn't say his name but Saitama is the strongest man in the world. Or one of the strongest. I like to brag about my future son-in-law." she whispered blithely.
Huh? Tatsumaki froze stiff. Excuse me, what the HELL is she talking about? Tatsumaki thought. My heart won't ever change for Blast. What does she mean I'm supposed to be in love with Dr. Gray?
"I can't be mistaken that this "Dr. Gray" isn't the strongest man in the world. Isn't that a shampoo for hair loss? My late husband used it. That was embarrassing. He had no hair, did it matter if it were gray?" Lady Shibabawa murmured.
Something didn't make sense. What? How could this happen? This was so weird? How was he able to be the strongest man in the world? What the hell?
Lady Shibabawa patted Tatsumaki's cheek. "You do not know how strong he is? I may not be there to celebrate your wedding. It'll be sad not to see you like a monk. Always happy. Always calm."
All Tatsumaki did was glare at the world. Tatsumaki always promised to mangle people's faces so badly that they couldn't be identified. She liked leaving people at her mercy because they wouldn't make fun of her or treat her like a kid. She remembered how she didn't have history, just hatred.
"I'm not a monk. I…" Tatsumaki shook her head.
"You will be. Everyone will love you," Lady Shibabawa promised. "Your love for others is a bit shy and odd and standoffish but it's still there."
Tatsumaki didn't know what to do. She watched as self-assurance of hers crumbled. And Lady Shibabawa was never wrong, for some reason. She didn't believe the seer if she didn't see how unlikely her prediction was.
I'll humour this old bat for a while. She is wrong, for the first time in her life. No need to cause that old heart grief, Tatsumaki thought.
But looking at Lady Shibabawa made her sigh, close her eyes and surrender. "Okay."
###
The next day, Tatsumaki was back in City Z, watching the sunlight pierce through the thick clouds. It was a spruce morning, birds chirping, breezes covering her in a blanket heat. How was it always this hot?
Tatsumaki laid on top of a clean building, a perch she's come to love. It was in the Ghost Town and in surprisingly good shape. She could see the lovely city and her prey. She had a bag full of papers, reports and candy.
Tatsumaki couldn't sleep all night since Flashy Flash killed his whole village and two villagers were espers which impacted the already low population of her kind. Also, Lady Shibabawa said Dr. Gray was the strongest man in the world and she was destined to fall in love with him.
Tatsumaki would rather not suffer nightmares or expectations.
Tatsumaki decided, through the coffee and sleep deprivation, that no, Lady Shibabawa was lying and getting senile. That old woman forgot things, started fights in the market and still believed in the confinement period after pregnancy.
No way was Tatsumaki believing in that old goat. Besides, Tatsumaki didn't need to be a monk! No way! To prove it, to prove the elderly woman wrong, Tatsumaki will spend time around Dr. Gray and prove that they could never fall in love.
Once the problem of monsters and Dr. Gray's indescribable strength was uncovered, she won't bother him anymore. The flower of partnership blooms even in hell. No dream of hers got covered by moss or gets buried in the dirt. Until then, she's going to be latched on.
Instead of a yellow blob, Tatsumaki saw a blue tracksuit and the shiniest egghead. It wasn't a stylish get up but it wasn't loud and dumb like his last outfit. He breathed quietly and stealthily, just like Tatsumaki and walked like an old man.
"Hey, Dr. Gray!" Tatsumaki called out.
Dr. Gray owed Tatsumaki 1000 good impressions or 1000 chances for them not to fall in love.
He didn't even stop until he looked up and sighed. "Damn it," he said quietly. "What are you doing in City Z?"
"I claimed this city." Tatsumaki floated to him.
"That sucks. The surface is mine," he said smugly.
The surface of the earth. Bah! That's impossible. The entirety of earth? No way!
Tatsumaki scoffed. "The city is mine. Sucks to suck, Dr. Gray." she stuck out her tongue.
He shrugged, frowning sourly at her.
"Listen here, I have this city. Any happenings I don't like, I make them go extinct," she lifted a soda can and crushed it. "Hurting my companions, my city or my people carry a high price. Anyone who doesn't agree pays for it. And you, you are allowed to run wild in City A under my name." she gave a smile.
"Ah. I feel like you're not listening to me." he scratched the back of his bald head.
Why should Tatsumaki? He should listen to her. She was the boss here, yeah?
He tilted his head at her. "How'd you even find me? This is super unusual."
Tatsumaki shook her head. "Anyway," she sighed, letting the tin can fall to her feet. "I practically memorized the streets. It's difficult to keep an eye on you if the forest isn't landscaped, yeah? I haven't gotten to the Ghost Town since that is your responsibility to tell me about this two-star city…"
"You've been looking for me a lot. Why?"
"Pfft. You owe me 1000 good impressions and should want to work with me. Should I write this down?"
"No, no, no," Dr. Gray recoiled a bit, dismissing her words. "Zuzu, look, I didn't promise that—"
Tatsumaki laughed heartily, breathy and empty. "Having hair doesn't collect memories or brain cells. Being bald is no excuse to forget. You promised me 1000 good impressions. Until our work is done, you fucking keep up with your promises." she snarled.
"Uh—"
"When I work with someone, they build a complete dependence on me. What time we have, we spend together," Tatsumaki said. "Until the last word of the report, of course."
"That makes it sound like a relationship." he voiced.
And that's it! Tatsumaki was at the end of her road. She normally could very well be made of chrome, shining brilliantly whilst deflecting the idiots.
"I'm not trying to make us sound ENGAGED. Don't make it sound like we're going to our home in make-belief. That's the last thing I want. Can't you think rationally? I am not in love with you. I do love my work. So, get it through your head that I am obsessed with getting this job done, straightening out the restricted area and killing monsters instead of making dumb small talk."
"Killing monsters should be fun," Dr. Gray said quietly.
"Stop lolling around like a dumb old man. Why are you out at this time? I thought you slept in." she said, collecting her stuff while she walked ahead.
He cautiously followed her, behind by a few metres. "Sleeping in? I woke up late," he replied. "6:02 a.m." he elaborated, completely defeated.
"What time do you normally wake?' Tatsumaki asked, curious for some reason.
"6:00 a.m."
So. He's respectable, she admitted internally. And he wandered the streets at 6 am, much like she did. Did he pick through trash or something?
"Wait, what were you doing now?" Tatsumaki gesticulated around her.
"Working out."
Hm. It probably doesn't work since he's minorly buff. To the extent that Zombieman was. Zombieman was ripped and he wasn't some piece of boring muscle. He also got her apple trees. Zombieman's not the worse, she also admitted internally.
"Hey. Mine stopped but do your arms make clicking sounds when you work out?" he asked carelessly, gesturing to his elbow.
Tatsumaki shuddered. What the hell? She didn't work out the way those muscleheads do. Dr. Gray should get that checked out. Seriously. She instinctively held her elbows. She didn't have a clicking sound.
"That's not normal. You don't know that? Is that why you failed med school?" she sneered
He moved his elbow, about to protest when there was a clicking noise. They met eyes. What the hell?!
"I swear, that wasn't me," he said, catching her mildly horrified.
Tatsumaki shuddered again. "Let's go deal with the early rising monsters wreaking havoc on society. We do need a desk and I assume you have a cardboard box somewhere around here. Don't worry, I won't blow on it." she promised.
"I have an apartment." Dr. Gray corrected her.
"Ah. Good. You probably won't afford a train ride to City A." she said. "I refuse to pay for anything more for you."
He gave her a skeptical look. "So, what do you have against scientists? You almost killed a guy in front of me. He said some shady stuff but I don't kill people. Do you?"
"I don't!" Tatsumaki nodded. Damn shady stuff. She wanted to kill the scientist for wanting to hurt Fubuki.
"There are ambulances who interfere with natural selection. Then there are humans, who allow nature to take its true form. Creatures are everywhere, deal with it."
"Nature is cruel but creatures are kind. You shouldn't act like that, moron." he leaned down and flicked her forehead. "Mo-ron."
She stuttered backwards. How did he do that to her— again? She didn't see him move. And what right does he have to touch her forehead?
"I-I act how I damn well please. What the hell do YOU know about my situation?! You're on the outside. The outside. Don't try to come into things you don't have any business in."
He walked on for a while.
Before Tatsumaki could tell him to piss off, he was rapt with attention on her. He turned his feet in her direction, eyes trained on her every atom and cell, with him feeling levelled with Tatsumaki.
"Zuzu, if you hurt more people, I'll find you before other people do," he said, cold. "We'll fight."
Tatsumaki turned away. "Hmph. As if you could touch me. You're designed not to be taken seriously. No one but me is."
He just groaned. "You're annoying and you scream like a vocal beast," he said. "Annoying."
Tatsumaki laughed and clenched her teeth. "And you're stupid. Schools crumble when you walk inside. Carry on," Tatsumaki hissed. "Let's go read the documents I prepared. It has the different data me and my Bearded Worker fixed up. Hurry up and escort." Tatsumaki patted her bag.
"Data? You're actually serious about this?" he yawned, stuffing his hand on the pocket of his.
"When am I not?" she said. "Stop making drama like some earnest underdog."
Dr. Gray groaned but sighed, apparently leading the way. Tatsumaki followed him with the small idea of who he was. Was she bothering him? Obviously. Was she putting stock into this person who didn't really care about anything?
Why was he important enough for Lady Shibabawa to think about?
"Dr. Gray," she called out.
He stopped, looking over his shoulder. He actually listened to her?
Tatsumaki settled her expression. "Do a good job. I chose you for this job," she said unobtrusively. "I don't usually choose people. So, don't fuck it up."
He got quiet, wind blowing above them. The sky reflected on his bald head, no worry emanating from the guy. Candy apples playing on the edges of her tongue.
"I'm a good choice." Dr. Gray waved away her warning. "It's annoying."
"I said what I said to you. Remember it."
"Ah. I said what I said."
"Tch." Tatsumaki walked ahead. "Whatever."
Tatsumaki popped a small candy in her mouth, sucking on the sourness. Sourness; that's all she could taste lately. But it tasted like apple fields when around him and she didn't mind. She really didn't.
###
-End Chapter-