Disclaimer: All originating characters and storylines belong to their respectful owner. This is mostly a continuation of ALW's work, but I do throw GL a couple of good nods. All new characters and sub-plots are my original work and are not to be used/reproduced without my expressed permission. Enjoy the story and shoot some feedback my way if you can! Thanks for reading.
Author's Note: I'm sorry, it has been REALLY hard to stay motivated lately. Sorry for the lack of updates. I will try to do better. Thanks if you're still reading . . .
Phanatic: Sorry if I let you down. I will try to be a better author. Thanks for all your continuing support!
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Chapter Sixteen
Madame Giry had been sleeping less and less in the past two weeks. Laying her head down on her pillow, she tried to get her exhausted body to rest, but her mind kept her racing. It was difficult to adjust having two new people in the house. Of course she was glad to have Meg under her roof again, safe and sound. Erik also promised to stay until Meg fully recovered, and Meg was still a long way from being back to the way she was. There was very little change about her, in fact. It was difficult living with a man. Mme. Giry had to be mindful of the way she acted in her own house. Erik was an old friend, of course, but as much as she loved Erik, Mme. Giry found it hard to trust him as she once did. Too much had changed.
Granted, he wasn't the over-powering threat that had terrified her ballet corps once upon a time, but she had allowed herself to feel comfortable with him. For that she blamed herself for much of the terrible acts he committed. He was only a child then and looked to her for approval and guidance. Unfortunately, at only fifteen, Mme. Giry was not in a place or frame of mind where she felt comfortable acting as a mother to a child that was more than half her age. Still, she argued with herself, she should have shown him the way. Perhaps he would have been a better man.
Upon Meg and Erik's return, Mme. Giry was careful not to permit herself to feel as comfortable around Erik as she once did. It was easy in the beginning to shrug off Erik's indifference and outbursts due to his upbringing and lack of parental figures. It was a slow process for Erik to turn out the way he did. She would not allow him the opportunity to manipulate her into one of his pawns again. To her surprise, he remained cordial, even friendly, to her and decided that he would manage the housework and tend to the horse. It was one less thing for Mme. Giry to worry about.
The first week she had spent trying to help Meg was without much success. Meg's constant screaming made her speech incoherent and hoarse. She consistently fought her mother when she attempted to help her. Bruises were appearing on Mme. Giry's hands and face from their battles. Erik remained in the corners of the room, pacing and watching. Erik had to intervene to subdue Meg when she lashed out in inexplicable frenzy and overpowered her mother. Every night he left to procure some food and retrieve fresh water. He did his best to provide for all three of them, but Mme. Giry knew that he was growing tired. She also knew better than to ask him to leave. He had already pledged to stay by her side until Meg had recovered.
Neither Meg nor Erik revealed what had led to this. After constant probing, Erik would only divulge that Meg had been residing at the Opera house for quite some time but he refused to elaborate any further. Meg's fascination with Erik was perplexing. Mme. Giry would watch in horror as her daughter called out to him begging for his forgiveness and pledging to him her undying love. She knew that Erik was uncomfortable and Mme. Giry would assign him tasks outside the house assuring him that she would call upon him if the need ever arose. During the fourth day Mme. Giry simply placed a chair in front of the bed to watch over her daughter, allowing whatever mood Meg was feeling to come over her. Mme. Giry watched in silence as, over and over again, her little girl went from being placid to acting with raging fury within a just few minutes of each other. She tried to remain calm and unattached to it all, but she couldn't help but feel completely helpless.
What Erik had said still plagued her thoughts. She couldn't understand what Erik had meant when he said that Meg wanted to kill Christine. Mme. Giry knew how much Meg adored her. As children, they were like sisters. Everyone always said that if you wanted to find one of the girls, just search for the other. After what had happened that cold March night, Meg was distraught by not being able to find her beloved friend. Both of them were forced to assume the worst. Meg had made it her personal endeavor to find her and bring her back to safety. Mme. Giry had to deal with the possible deaths of three people over her head. Meg was a wonderful support for her during her darkest hours. She made sure that her mother was fed and taken care of. She made sure that her mother's day was brightened if only by a small gesture or simple smile. Mme. Giry knew how lucky she was. Meg was able to breathe life back into her.
Mme. Giry remembered the day that Meg found Christine and Raoul's wedding announcement in the paper. Perhaps she should have recognized the anger and hostility Meg was capable of then. But now it was too late. She couldn't waste her time with the past. Meg needed help now, and feeling sorry for herself and the situation she was in was not the step in the right direction. With her own reasoning, she concluded that Meg only wanted Christine dead for hurting her and her family.
This fixation with Erik was an entirely different matter. The man was twice her age. Meg knew he was dangerous and a threat. Immediately after the fiasco, Meg was upset with her mother for not saying anything about how dangerous Erik was. While Meg was just a young toddler, Erik had shown her favoritism among all the dancers. It was the first time Mme. Giry had ever seen him smile in wonderment and awe as he cradled her young baby in his arms. She never had to wonder about Meg's safety while she was in the theater. She knew he was guarding her with this ever-watchful eye. Erik had even told Mme. Giry, once, that her daughter would be empress someday.
Given their history together, Mme. Giry did not find it surprising when he started his fascination with Christine. She was an orphan, like him. Perhaps just that small similarity made him think that this little girl would be the key to his happiness. Even as a child, she had very angelic features and everyone who saw her took in her charm and radiant glow. Erik was no exception. Seeing him with Meg, she didn't give a second thought about why he latched onto Christine the way he did. To her the answer was simple: He needed to feel wanted. He had spent his entire life in recluse, made to seem less than human. Even though she could not see him, Christine was able to share her most inner thoughts with him. She gave him the friendship that he had so desperately sought his entire life. As her teacher, she adored him without question.
When Christine had begun to blossom, she started to see the changes in Erik. It was not obvious then, but he was smitten with her. During the rehearsals and recitals, Erik always had Christine in full view. He would even become angry with Mme. Giry if she felt the need to correct Christine's steps or admonish her behavior. He was protective of her like any good teacher would be. Beside, Mme. Giry had often said to herself, Meg was first. He always made sure that Meg shined as well.
Why Meg had become fixated on Erik was a question she dared not ask. Questions of any kind were not something that she expected getting answers to, from either of them. Erik made it clear to her that he did not want to talk. Meg made it impossible to ask any kind of question. Mme. Giry could only hope that she would be able to help her daughter and bring her back from the madness that had overtook her.
As the days passed, Mme. Giry could see that there was something different about Erik now. He held a quiet softness to him, a trait she had never seen before. His vulnerability was exposed again and, this time, she immediately sought to comfort and soothe him. She had been his valiant protector and confidante in the beginning. There was no reason to stop now. When others abandoned him, she was there by his side. Seeing him as he was now, her soul felt a certain pride in the man he had become. The conceited monster that took over the poor, frail boy he once was no longer gripped him. She could tell that he felt freer than he had maybe his whole life. But she could tell that, now, his guilt loomed over him. While she was glad that he could feel remorse, she knew that, if not relieved in time, it would cripple him.
By the fifteenth day Meg was still infuriated and refused to speak to her mother. The food Mme. Giry left for her would go untouched until her mother fell asleep. When Madame awoke, the food would be gone. Mme. Giry carefully played with her daughter's hair as she slept. She twirled her long fingers around her golden curls. "At least she is here, safe with me," she would tell herself. Meg's hostility wasn't only directed at her mother. During the times that Erik intervened, Meg would scream at him, trying to kick him in the face and chest. Her passion for him seemed to dwindle with each passing day, much to Mme. Giry's relief. His perceived betrayal, it seemed, forced Meg to turn on him as well.
On their sixteenth day, Meg had a particularly bad episode. It took all of Mme. Giry's nerve to stand by and merely watch her daughter fall to pieces. Erik paced nervously back and forth as Meg seemed to writhe in pain. The frustration was overwhelming. Erik looked sympathetically at Mme. Giry before turning to leave the house. Erik had had enough for the morning. Madame wanted nothing more than to follow him, but stopped herself. Fixing Meg was her duty. The responsibility of it was hers alone. She had never felt more alone and afraid. If Meg did not wake herself from this, Mme. Giry felt Meg would die from it.
Awaking from a small nap, Mme. Giry became resolute in her task. For too long she had doubted herself and used the tragedies in her life as excuses. If Henri could see her now, she knew that he would be disappointed in her. Her beauty had always been fair and great, but it was her boldness and fearless gumption that made Henri fall in love with her. It was how she became headmistress of the Opera Populaire. Her ballet corps was the best in the nation, not because of her flattery, but because of her sheer nerve and dedication to perfection. She measured her life by her success. Now, she knew, it would help her see her daughter through this.
Mme. Giry approached Meg cautiously. Though she tried to hide herself from Meg's view, she stopped when Meg through herself around in a fit of rage. Mme. Giry forcefully grabbed her daughter by her wrists trying to manipulate them behind her back. When Meg started to kick her, Mme. Giry forced her daughter in the bed face down and used her weight to pin Meg's shoulders down with her knees. Meg continued screaming and bucking, but Mme. Giry held fast. "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS! Stop this now! You can try to fight me Cherie, but you know I will not back down. I am tired of playing your little game! If you are testing my nerves, then you do not know how resolute your mother truly is. Go ahead and continue to fight me! If you insist that I treat you like a child, then I will continue this. But you are a lady now, and this is no way to act. But if you want to fight some more, then please continue. You will tire eventually, and when you wake up we can do this some more. Go on!"
Meg stopped, but Mme. Giry did not leave her post. "Now you will stop this nonsense this very moment! I think I have put up with this for long enough. I did not raise my daughter to be an animal! This is no way for a person to behave! Do you understand me?" When Meg didn't answer, Mme. Giry screamed again at her, "Do you understand!"
Meg gave one more half-hearted squirm before stopping. A quiet sob, "Yes, Mama," was all Meg could whisper coherently.
"That's better," Mme. Giry said triumphantly. "Now I am going to get off, but I will not hesitate to do this again should the need arise. You will conduct yourself like a lady." Madame rose slowly, arming herself should Meg retaliate. To her surprise, she didn't. Mme. Giry eased herself off the bed. Meg lay quiet, tears streaming down the side of her face. Mme. Giry sat down next to her and began stroking her hair. She was softly humming a lullaby. Meg cried harder. Her mother began running her hand up and down her back. "I should have come after you," Mme. Giry whispered to her. "My pride and vanity got in the way, I'm sorry." She laid on the next to her daughter, cradling her in her arms as best she could. "I didn't mean to make it so hard for you. It's all my fault. I should never have expec – expected you to do my job." Mme. Giry buried her face in Meg's hair. "Your father would be ashamed of me, but I promise we'll get through this." She squeezed her daughter in an embrace. "Okay?"
Meg calmly whispered through her sobbing, "Yes, Mama."
Madame. stayed by her side until Meg fell asleep. She emptied all the waste bins that accumulated. Mme. Giry started to warm water for a bath. Since Meg's arrival, she finally felt peace inside. Reclaiming her authority would not be easy, she knew. Meg had been living her own life for almost two years. When she started to disrobe, she heard a resonant voice call out to her, "Clarise?" Erik was standing behind her, turned to one side to protect her privacy. Mme. Giry quickly re-dressed herself.
"I did not think you were coming back so soon." She turned to Erik. Smiling, she said, "You have not called me by that name since I was married."
"I'm sorry, Mada - " Erik began
Mme. Giry interrupted, "No, Erik, don't apologize. That is my name, after all. It is just strange. No one has called me by that name in years." She nodded to Meg. "I think she finally understands. From this day, I do not think that she will be a problem to handle. I just had to realize," she paused, "that I am her mother. If I can't help her, who can?" Her eyes started to tear. "If Henri could see me now - "
"He would be so proud, Clarise," Erik interjected. "This is not your fault. All these years you have been so kind to me. I ruined everything for you," he said quietly. "If any one is to blame, it's me."
"No, Erik, no. No one is to blame. Well, perhaps, Fate," she laughed nervously. "All this happened for a reason. For what greater purpose, I do not know." They quietly acknowledged the awkward silence. What needed to be said had finally been said and they sat together at the kitchen table, not needing to say anything more. Finally Mme. Giry whispered, "Thank you, Erik, for bringing me to her." He nodded. She grabbed his hand delicately from across the table. "I think she will be all right now. I will understand if you leave us."
He placed his hands on top of hers. "You know I would not," Erik answered back. "You have been -my greatest friend. I would never be able to repay your kindness."
"You have paid me back by tenfold." Clarise tenderly stroked his face. "I am a greater person by knowing you. You see, I have had the opportunity to see so many sides of you that hide from everyone else. I will always hold you dear to me." She got up to make some tea. "You know, if I had the chance, knowing what I do now, I do not know if I would have chosen to be with Henri. You had been so fond of me."
"Clarise," Erik smiled at her, "I was a foolish boy with a crush. When Henri came into your life, you left mine. You were my only friend. I was jealous, that's all."
"Still," Mme. Giry continued, "We were both foolish, young people. Things might have been different for us both." She set the teakettle on the stove. Turning back she said softly, "You deserved to be loved, too."
Erik smiled sadly to himself. "It was not in my fate, I suppose," whispered mostly to himself. He looked back over to the bath and said, "I am interrupting you. Please, continue." He turned away and walked to the door. "I will be in the stable if you should need me further."
"But the tea," Mme. Giry started, but Erik waved her off and continued for the door. Her heart hurt only for a moment before she resigned to her much-needed bath.
When she finished, Erik was waiting for her at the table. There was a fresh cup of tea on the table. She looked over to him, "Erik, I –" He stopped her. Erik joined her and pulled a large wallet from his coat pocket. He set it on the table and slid it across to Mme. Giry. Puzzled, she carefully picked up. The parcel he had given her lay heavy in her hands. She untied its wrappings and was surprised to find it packed with billfolds. She gasped, "Erik!" Thumbing through the pile she looked up and told him, "I cannot accept this. Erik, there must be over 150,000 Franks in here!"
"Actually, I think it's a little over 180,000. Enough to start a new school of your own. Start fresh. I have enough provisions." He looked to the ground. "Please, it's the least I could do. Take it." He held up his hands to show the surroundings. "You are so much better than this. Let me help you."
She sat and stared at the money for a few moments. There were tears in her eyes as she reached across the table, knocking the tea across the top of it. Kissing Erik more passionately than she intended to, her tears felt warm against his cheek. "Thank you," Mme. Giry whispered to him after they broke their embrace. "I will pay you back, all of it, I swear." She saw tears welling in his eyes, "Please, say you'll stay here with us. I cannot do this without you."