DISCLAIMER: this text contains sensitive subjects related to depression/psychological struggles.

The following week went by pretty fast, after spending 2 days in John's baggy (on her) clothes and bath robes, Alice finally had a happy moment when her purchases arrived. John had a moment of fun too watching her getting all embarrassed after signing the arrival from the corporate delivery guy, who handed her a dozen of Chanel, Victoria's Secrets and Calvin Klein's bags.

— These are essential items, ok? Alice said, trying to be serious, excusing herself.

— I said nothing. John said laughing and raising both hands while leaning over the living room's wall.

The days were getting by sweetly, Alice and John were getting along very well, although they were still ignoring completely what happened between them. It was never the best moment to talk it through for Alice, she always struggled with dealing with her problems, and always preferred to simply ignore them until they disappeared by themselves. However, this "problem" would not disappear by itself, and was in fact getting more and more difficult to ignore.

They were trying to keep things as cold as possible between them, in a sexual attraction perspective, but the more time they spent together, the more they were secretly growing feelings for each other. They enjoyed cooking together, going out jogging together, even doing basic house chores was fun. Alice was starting to feel negatively anxious thinking about this Disney-romance-fantasy-like vacation getting to an end and her having to get back to work in the next week. She would miss this so fucking much... She got to the point of thinking it would not be that bad if she kept being chased by Russian bad guys and had to keep hiding in John's place for a few more months...

On a gray Thursday morning, though, Alice woke up determined to finally discuss their situation.

Overthinking ruins you. Ruins the situation, twists it around, makes you worry and just makes everything much worse than it actually is, Alice remembered her mother always said that. But it was impossible not to overthink right now.

She felt that John had some feelings for her, that's what was giving her hope and encouraging her to insist on this. After all, also as her mother always said "you already have the 'no'" . On the other hand, she kept asking herself if John was simply being extremely polite with her, since he was an incredible gentleman… But she could swear she could almost touch the sexual tension in the air around them.

With this in mind, she got out of bed pretty early — hoping she would be able to go downstairs before John to prepare a nice breakfast for them — took a shower, got dressed with a killing deep blue knit dress that simply made her skin, her eyes and her hair color glow and exposed her Kylie Jenner-ish curves beautifully, paired with knee-high dark gray socks. She then headed downstairs, looking ridiculously hot.

To her deception, John was already up, leaning on the kitchen marble sink, gorgeous as always, finishing a cup of coffee, in a pair of light gray sweatpants and a white long-sleeved t-shirt that made his muscles deliciously visible. Alice could swear she saw John's eyes sparkle when he saw her going down the stairs to meet him in the kitchen. She was feeling confident and hot. To be honest, Alice was indeed a very attractive and naturally elegant woman, although she looked very girlish sometimes, especially when she was without makeup, which was also adorable.

— Gosh, you wake up early! Alice said disappointed.

— Is that somehow bad? John laughed a little confused. — Good morning by the way, he added teasing.

— Oh, sorry, good morning! Alice smiled graciously running her hand through her just blow-dried hair, which made John discretely bite his bottom lip. — I'm joking. I was just hoping I could make breakfast at least once during my stay at this fancy hotel...

John smiled and proceeded to pour some coffee for her. He handed her a mug, and got back to lean relaxed on the kitchen marbled sink. Alice sipped on the coffee impatient. She was clearly up to something, making John smirk. After blowing her coffee a few times, she suddenly chugged on it at once, as if it was a vodka shot hoping this could give her courage, which caused her to make a cute ugly face. John opened his eyes wide in disbelief, wanting to laugh at the scene. Alice then stepped in front of him, which caused him to immediately go serious and attentive.

— John, I... huh... Alice stuttered, breathless, trembling with anxiety. She had a whole speech tattooed in her mind. She would say that she wanted a chance with him, although she knew pretty well how complicated it all would be. That she knew that somehow he was into her, and that we only live once so why not give it a try, that since they kissed, she could not forget the taste of his lips and...and… well, in the end, she shook her head and gave it all up, blushing hard. — So, huh... Do you have a dog?

John laughed out loud.

— What's wrong with you today? He said.

— Oh.. nothing...She looked down, so fucking cute, with her face scarlet red and her freckles standing out. — So… do you? Alice said, backing away and sitting on one of the kitchen stools, trying not to breathe so loudly while recovering from the adrenaline boost she just had for nothing.

— Yeah, I do actually. What do you think about some toast and blueberry jelly? He said plainly while opening the pantry.

— I'd love it. So... Where is your dog?

— He's at a friend's house. Since I had a job that would probably take me about a week to complete, the day before the party I had already left him with this friend. And even though I cancelled my other mission, I ended up getting into a new one. Much more complicated by the way. He said looking back from the pantry and smiling at her, making Alice blush again, he certainly had no freaking idea how charming he was.

— And what's his or her name?

— Well.. John smiled looking down a little embarrassed — I actually ended up not giving him a name… But I call him Buddy.

— What kind of a person doesn't give their dog a name?! Alice teased.

— Yeah, I know… It lacks me creativity sometimes.

— It would be lovely to have a dog around.

— So you like dogs? I'll get him back as soon as I know George's plan for you. I hope you get to know him.

— Cool. Yeah, I always wanted to have a dog... Well, I technically did have one when I was a child, but he passed away and my parents never wanted another one. After I got out of their house I was always so busy in Medical School, and then working, that I... Alice suddenly realized she was talking so much and so fast, probably due to the coffee she chugged, but John was sitting in front of her, paying attention to every detail. — Sorry, I'm indeed weird today...

— Please... you don't need to be sorry. I love knowing a little more about you. He said timidly and bit a piece of toast. — So you never had the chance to own a dog after you became an adult.

— Yep, that's it. It might be nice to have a friend around, always ready to show you some love and play. It's good for the brain as well, she winked.

— Good to know. We better make sure our brain is in good shape. John joked. — Speaking of brain, I wanted to ask: What made you choose Neuroscience?

— Oh that's a long story, she answered sighing.

— We have all the time.

— Ok, Mr Curious, she smiled and looked down sighing again. — Well, I'm not an only-child, although I do seem a little spoiled sometimes. I hav…had an older brother, his name was Sam, he was… the world to me. We were like best friends as our ages were not too far apart. Well, everything was perfect, he was a happy child, as far as I can remember, but he didn't deal well with puberty and teenage in general, I'd say. When he was about 17, and I was 14, he told me he was gay and was very scared of telling mom and dad, Alice's voice started breaking at this point, but she moved on — Well, because although my parents were very lovely and caring with us, they were also very traditional and conservative. So, he held that secret for almost another year, although it was getting harder and harder. Especially when it leaked at school after a group of jerks saw him kissing another guy in the bathroom and started bullying him, Alice made a pause, looked down and a tear rolled down her left cheek, making John caress her hand over the counter.

— I'm really sorry, I didn't know if was such a delicate subject. You can stop if you prefer, I hate seeing your cry. John said in a low voice, frowning his eyebrows.

— No, it's ok. It's just that it has been a while since I went through these thoughts… But I don't mind sharing it with you. Alice wiped her cheek and breathed in. — So, one day, I noticed he was taking too long in the shower, we were about to go out to visit some relatives. I decided to go check on him and entered his bedroom, but his bathroom door was locked. I called him several times and he didn't answer, so I started screaming my parents. My dad broke the door open and… and he had… attempted suicide. He cut his wrists. I will never forget this scene, it is tattoed in my head. It all happened in slow motion. He was still alive, just passed out, so my mother called 911, but he didn't resist, he passed away still on the way to the hospital.

— I'm so sorry, Alice. It must have been the hardest thing in the world for a teenage girl. John said with tears in his eyes, handing Alice a tissue.

— Thank you, John. It was hardcore to me, yeah… He left us a letter, saying he couldn't take it all anymore. He didn't understand why he was different, he tried to run away from his feelings, but he just couldn't and he felt like he didn't fit society or our family. So after all this, I decided I wanted to understand a little better about human brain and all its complexities. Today it is pretty clear to me that my brother fought depression for years, but my parents and I just didn't realize it, they were always too busy, and I was too immature… I… I blamed myself a lot, I wanted to have done something.

— Baby, there was nothing you could have done at 14. You barely could understand what was happening to yourself at this age. I hope you don't blame yourself anymore.

— I don't feel blame anymore, but I feel sad with myself, or with the situation at all. I wish I could had made it clear for him that we would go through anything together… That there was a solution for him, that his life was not over…

— Of course... I imagine this also affected your relationship with your parents?

— Yes, it did. I… locked myself from them after this, and we got further and further away.

— Do you still have contact with them?

— No, they actually have passed away about 5 years ago, in a car accident, but we barely talked to each other before that.

John stood up and hugged her, caressing her hair. He wished he could erase all the pain from her life, if he had this choice.

— I admire you so much for wanting to learn all this for your brother's memory. You became an incredible professional. Your work for is remarkable. You transformed your pain into strength to become someone better. I'm lucky I met you. John said kissing the top of her head.

Alice looked up and they stared for a moment. The attraction between them was ridiculous. John couldn't help thinking that her lips looked fucking juicy and her eyes were an incredible light honey color.

They united all their strength to look away from each other and moved on to finish their breakfast. They changed the subject and kept talking about silly things to push away the dark and heavy subject proceeded to finish their coffee. Their conversation moved to work and they start making a summary of all the information they had about Alice's case.

This was also something they were enjoying to do together lately: work and investigate the clues related to the mission. After several hours sitting on the couch reading and trying to put a few more pieces of the puzzle together, Alice fell asleep on John's shoulder, she was definitely not used to waking up so early. John couldn't help but timidly turn his head and sense her perfume. He got out of the couch as carefully as he could and lied her down, covering her body with a blanket to allow her to rest.

When Alice woke up after a very long nap, it was already 4PM and it was already dark outside with what looked like a storm coming. Alice couldn't find John around, and since she was starving, she decided to made her a sandwich. After eating her sandwich and sneaking around the house a little, she noticed the basement light was on and the door was half-open , "John might be there", she thought. She knocked on the door and heard him say "You can come down".

She opened her eyes wide after getting down when she saw all the guns he had downstairs, all organized in a black steel shelf and a complete workbench, where he was at. As the whole house, the shelf and the workbench were ridiculously organized.

— Hi Sleeping Beauty. He said while disassembling what looked like a very big gun.

— You silly. She smiled. — So this is your office, huh?

— Pretty much, yeah.

— Whoa... I didn't even know these existed... Alice pointed at the shelf, to some wild knives and even a sword, causing John to laugh through his nose.

— So… are you excited to get back to work next week? John asked, casually.

— Well, I... I hate to say that out loud but.. nah, I'm not actually.

— Really? Why not? Thought you were all bored already. I'm a very grumpy and boring company, I know. He said, excusing himself.

— You are definitely not. We've been having so much fun... You even taught me how to play War! Alice exclaimed, making John laugh hard.

— Since you mentioned that, I've got to say you're pretty bad at it. Or maybe I am a terrible teacher. John teased.

— How do you dare? Alice slapped his arm with the back of her hand causing John to frown and place his hand over the spot, pretending it hurt. — You, me, War, upstairs, NOW! Alice screamed trying to sound offended.

John nodded agreeing, place the gun parts over the desk and they proceeded to head upstairs. Alice went first, giving John a privileged view of her ass, which made him have to quietly adjust his cock to avoid a boner. Arriving upstairs they both set the War board over the kitchen counter.

— You know what? Let's make this game more exciting. Every time a territory is conquered by one of us, the other must take a shot! Alice said smirking as if she had invented the wheel.

— I am not supposed to drink while working. John said, arms crossed, trying to find an excuse.

— Oh, so you already admit you'd have to take too many shots? Alice teased.

— Fine. I'm not going to chicken out. He agreed and headed to the living room.

John grabbed his favorite vodka bottle and 2 little shot glasses and sat next to Alice to start the game. They were both taking it pretty seriously, but after about 40 minutes of game each of them had already chugged 5 or 6 shots and were starting to get more giggly with each other than they normally already were.

In the middle of their game, the storm which earlier was getting close, finally arrived, causing the energy to shut down suddenly, to which Alice reacted with a little scream, making John laugh deliciously.

— Let me light some candles. He said standing up and opening one of the cabinets to get a few candles and spread them around the kitchen.

After John started lighting some of them, Alice stood up to help him, but immediately stumbled on the foot of her stool, bumping right onto John and causing him to lean over the sink counter to avoid letting both of them fall. Alice's hands blindly grabbed on John's chest and shoulder, while he grabbed her by the waist, just above her ass, with a pretty strong grip, by reflex.

— Oopsie. Alice said giggling, inches from John's face, feeling his fast and warm breath on her nose.

At this very moment, the kitchen was ridiculously cozy and romantic, illuminated only by the few candles John had already lit, and a few occasional aggressive lightnings from outside. John was there, standing deadly serious, feeling Alice's body glued to his, a torture he could not bear anymore. Alice noticed it and her giggle immediately faded away. They kept staring at each other for a few seconds until Alice raised her head and placed a light kiss on his lips. John didn't hesitate this time, he simply could not, each day it became harder to ignore his attraction and his feelings for her. He embraced the kiss right away, exploring her with his tongue. Both tasted like alcohol and recklessness. John then broke the kiss flow, holding Alice's head between his hands, just like he did the first time, but this time he wasn't thinking about stopping.

— Are you sure about this? He whispered breathless with his pupils already fully dilated, reflecting the dim light.

Alice could only nod, pressing herself against him, looking at his lips.

John just thought about how good Alice smelled and how smooth was the texture of her dress... Although the fabric was pretty thick and cozy, it wrapped her body perfectly, allowing his fingers to feel every inch. Their kiss was becoming sloppier and sloppier, full of tongues and bites. Alice moaned feeling John's hardness through his sweatpants, and didn't resist the urge to touch it. John groaned in response. With big and agile hands, he flipped her around and they switched positions. Alice was now sitting on the kitchen sink, where he was once leaning against. Alice opened her legs allowing him to fit perfectly between them, while John drove her dress up until her waist to reveal her pair of black lace panties. At this point, he looked dangerously horny.

To Alice's surprise, John stopped kissing her lips and started kissing his path down, ending up kneeling in front of her. He grabbed her delicate panties with his huge hands and took them off roughly, causing Alice to arch her back desperately needing him. John kissed Alice's thighs and painfully rubbed his beard on her delicate skin. He placed both hands on the inner side of her thighs, opening them. He could easily see how wet she was already.

— Oh m-my...John... Alice moaned and was interrupted by John's mouth devouring her.

Alice rested both feet over John's back, and he took advantage to grab her butt cheeks with both hands, almost diving his face inside of her for a few delicious minutes, licking and sucking on her. Alice squirmed over the sink and cried out loud, grabbing his hair with one hand when she could not hold a violent wave of orgasm. John savored every second and only allowed himself to remove his mouth from her when she stopped shaking completely.

Getting up, John wiped his mouth and beard, damp with her, on his arm with the sleeve of his shirt. He looked wild as fuck. His cock was about to simply jump out of his pants by itself. He fit himself back between Alice's legs and without giving her time to recover her breath, he started kissing her again. His mouth tasted like her and now his hardness was touching her naked bottom as he pressed him against her. John pulled her dress totally off, over her head, revealing her gorgeous naked breasts, which bounced with the movement, making him whisper "fuck". She was totally naked now apart from her knee-high socks, which gave her a pretty sexy look actually. He instinctively covered her right nipple with his mouth and sucked on it and on the soft skin around her chest mercilessly, leaving a path of red marks with the pressure of his lips, while precisely pinching her left nipple between his thumb and index fingers. Alice was quickly ready again.

She reached to the waistband of his pants and pulled it down along with his Calvin Klein's, revealing his huge, shiny member.

Alice frowned and exhaled with a mix of pain and desire that flew from between her legs. She proceeded to pull John's shirt off over his head, revealing his gorgeous torso and messing his hair, now covering part of his face. The scar on his shoulder from the latest stab was very visible, as she had removed his stitches like a couple days before, Alice ran her fingers lightly over it. The heat from his body emanated on her and John was completely hypnotized. He was serious and focused on her eyes as if he could reach out to her soul.

— Please... Alice moaned pulling him close to her by his strong arms, digging her nails on him.

John grabbed his member with his right hand, making the muscles on his arm and chest flex deliciously under the candle lights, and placed it on her, rubbing it up and down her entrance, playing with it on her clit. Alice rolled her eyes shut, moving her head back moaning, this was almost unbearable to her.

— I want you to look at me. John growled between his teeth.

Alice obeyed, turning her head back at him and opening her eyes, which were fiery with lust. She felt her face burning, she was breathless and claimed him by hugging his waist with her legs, pressing him against her. John judged it was already time to finish their torture and glided inside of her, slowly causing tears to flood her eyes as she stretched to accommodate his length. Alice placed her arms around John's neck and opened her mouth, gasping without air when John started moving in and out of her. Their eyes were locked into each other's. Alice was rolling her eyes, fighting the urge to close them.

— Fuck, you feel so tight. John grunted.

— Holy sh… John, this…. Is…. sss….good... Alice moaned.

John was cruel but delicious. He knew exactly what he was doing, moving his hips to find her perfect spot and after a series of thrusts, echoing around the kitchen along with Alice's moans and the violent thunders outside, he hit right on it, over and over again, making Alice cry out loud again.

— Yes, John, right there. Please…Fuck yeah. Alice cried, in the rhythm of his strong thrusts.

— Can I cum inside of you? John whispered with a rough voice, sweat shining on his forehead, thrusting harder and harder against her.

Alice could not speak, she just shook her head positively, looking down to watch him going in and out of her. John slowed down, to give her a better view, he found it so naughty of her to enjoy looking directly at their sex... They were both going completely crazy with each other. John's eyes were glued on her face and she looked so fucking wild… John then, moved both hands to Alice's hips, grabbing on them to return the harder and faster thrusts and it didn't took too much time for Alice's body to explode in an even stronger orgasm, pulsing around his cock. It was the perfect stimulus for him to unload inside of her, his whole body covered in a thin layer of sweat.

They looked at each other, incredulous by what had just happened, catching their breath. John cupped Alice's face and kissed her softly while getting himself out of her, making her gasp.

— You are so fucking delicious... I was dying to say that out loud. John said in a low voice, resting his forehead on hers. Alice moved her hand to his chin, caressing his bottom lip with her thumb.

— You are. Alice answered. — I'm sure you knew how much I wanted you.

— I'd be lying if I said I didn't... But this... John gasped and looked up as if he was looking for words, then back at Alice, lifting her from the sink to his arms, spreading her legs around his body. — This is... I am... complicated, you know that, right?

— I do and I don't fucking care. Alice said, wrapping her arms around his neck.