Late for School
Chapter 4
By Archie Leach
Disclaimer: The characters are Rowling's. Zack and the plot are mine. No money is being made.
Zack awoke to the smell of eggs Benedict, croissants, and coffee. I could get used to this. He reached over and grabbed a croissant and put a goodly amount of strawberry marmalade on it and took a voracious bite. He added cream to his coffee and carefully sipped a bit of it. As he was busy eating his eggs Benedict, he noticed an envelope of heavy yellowish parchment, sealed in wax decorated with a crest of some sort, different animals surrounding a letter "H." It was addressed in the following way:
Mr. Zack Flood
Oxford Wizard Hospital
Section 2, Bed 4
"How odd," he said aloud, opening the envelope.
Dear Mr. Flood,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at the Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.
Term begins on September 1st. Please be at Kings Cross Train Station, Platform 9 ¾ at precisely 11 AM to catch the Hogwarts Express.
Yours sincerely,
Minerva McGonagall,
Deputy Headmistress
Platform 9 ¾? Minerva McGonagall…I wonder if that is Manus's sister? He remembered his mother's description of her from dinner the other day…coincidence? He counted off the number of days since that dinner; it was hard to believe that it was just five days ago. He wondered if his parents knew Minerva worked at Hogwarts.
He proceeded to unfold the second page, which read as follows:
Uniform
First-year students will require:
Three sets of plain work robes (black)
One plain pointed hat (black) for day wear
One pair of protective gloves (dragon hide or similar)
One winter cloak (black, silver fastenings)
Please note that all pupils' clothes should carry name tags
Course Books
All students should have a copy of each of the following:
The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1) by Miranda Goshawk
A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot
Magical Theory by Adalbert Waffling
A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration by Emeric Switch
One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi by Phylllida Spore
An Idiot's Guide to Potion Making by Severus Snape
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them by Newt Scamander
The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection by Quentin Trimble
Magical Drafts and Potions by Arsenius Jigger
Other Equipment
1 wand
1 cauldron (pewter, standard size 2)
1 set glass or crystal phials
1 telescope
1 set brass scales
Students may also bring an owl OR a cat OR a toad
PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN BROOMSTICKS
He chuckled at that last bit. I guess they don't trust us to clean our own rooms.
He went back over the list: three black work robes…that explained the penchant for robes. They started them young. He read the course book titles and took a particular interest in the potion-making books -- that ought to list a few of things I've been imbibing for the last two days.
I bet Mrs. Weasley knows where to pick up this stuff, he thought hopefully. It was good to see confirmation about his soon-to-be uprooted feline. All right Russell, it's you me against the world.
"I'm sorry to interrupt your reading sir, but I was wondering if you would like a bath?" a creature similar to the ones that bring him breakfast asked in a wavering voice.
"A bath…that's sounds wonderful!" he said zestfully and seeing the creature cringe he softened his tone. "Yes I would, thank you. Please lead the way." The creature led him through the double doors to a very nice bathroom with heated floors, real torches for lighting, and a big steaming bathtub full of bubbles, framed against a curtained window. "This looks wonderful, thank you. What's your name?" he asked politely.
"Name, sir?" he croaked nervously.
"Uh, yes…my name is Zack." He added, hoping to ease the creature's apprehension.
The creature's eyes shifting all around, and it finally uttered, "Filby, sir," before he quickly left the room.
I hope it's not abused, he thought. I can't imagine that Dumbledore would let that happen here, he convinced himself. Then taking off his hospital gown, he descended into the bath. Ahhhhhh. It was hot, but a good kind of hot, the kind a recently healed person needed to wash off the grime of healing injuries. He appraised his relative state of well being. His wounds were just pink skin now and his lacerations appeared to be fading, although it looked like he would have a small scar on his forehead -- a small reminder. He laid back and enjoyed just soaking in the bath for a while. Absent-mindedly going over the list in his head, a wand, two cauldrons, glass or crystal phials, a telescope, a set of brass scales, wizard textbooks, robes. Before he knew it, he had nodded off.
"Wake up, sleepy head," he heard a vaguely familiar female voice say loudly…and inside the bathroom.
"Mrs. Weasley," he said shocked and a little embarrassed, checking surreptitiously to see that his "parts" were reasonably hidden. "I'm in the bath tub!"
She dismissed his protestations. "Don't be silly, I've raised six boys," she offered as explanation.
Still blushing he said, "But I'm not one of them."
She interrupted him. "You are for the next two weeks, dear." Noticing his reluctance, she gave him his towel and added, "Since you insist on being so shy, I'll wait outside, but let's get a move on. We have lots to do. Oh, and Zack dear," she turned back to him, "I went to your apartment and got some clean clothes for you—not that there were many clean clothes to choose from." She frowned at him. "They are on the chair," she said and indicated a chair near the sink. Then she left.
Zack struggled to a standing position, still feeling stiff. What have I done? He hurriedly groomed himself and put on jeans, a white T-shirt, blue socks and running shoes. He'd worn worse looking ensembles before and it was nice of her to try at least, he thought and headed back to his room. Madam Pomfrey greeted him as he entered.
"Professor Dumbledore has decided you can check out today," she clipped. "I think another day would have been prudent, but what do I know." She headed over to her desk.
After a moment, Zack drifted over toward her desk. "Do you really think I should stay another day? If you do, I will request it." She looked up at him, astonished, and Zack added, "This is your hospital, so I think it should be your decision. You were instrumental in saving not only my life, but my cousin's life as well. This is not a debt I will ever forget."
Blushing, she fussed with some items on her desk for a moment. "It has been my privilege to help you and Elizabeth. What you did to save that girl's life was nothing short of miraculous, and I have written to tell my sister about it. But while I believe one more night would be helpful, it is not necessary." She paused for moment, shook her head and asked, "Would you do me a favor?"
"Anything, just name it."
"My sister runs the hospital at Hogwarts and is a remarkable physician. I think you should work with her to hone and refine your wizarding medical skills. Who knows, you may be able to launch an entirely new branch of wizarding medicine?" she exclaimed.
Stunned, Zack stood for a moment, "I honestly think you said more just now than you did the entire time I was here," he teased. She blushed a little, giggled, and waved him off with her hand. "If you think it's best I'll do it -- but honestly, I have no idea what I did."
"Don't you worry about that, if it's there, Poppy will find it," she said firmly.
"Okay then, I'll do my best…and thanks again for everything."
Still red in the cheeks, she said, "Your parents dropped a small bag for you to pack your things. They are all waiting for you in the great room, down the hall past the bathroom and to your right. You can't miss it."
He went and packed his few belongings, which included the letter to Hogwarts, and headed for the great room. He took one last look around and headed out the door.
A host of people was waiting for him, some of whom he didn't recognize.
"You look so much better honey," his mother said hugging him. Zack noticed she looked much better than the other day too.
"Thanks, I…" Zack started.
"Remarkable work they do here," his dad added, looking him over. "Truly amazing."
"Yes, I…"
His Aunt Felicia moved in, "Were very happy you are okay Zack. What you did for Elizabeth…well…" she couldn't finish as her eyes filled.
"It was my…"
"Zack, look! You made the front page of The Daily Prophet," cried his uncle, shoving a paper at him. "It's all the Ministry is talking about…"
"Pardon me, Larry. I'm Cornelius Fudge, Minister for Magic, a pleasure to meet you. Perhaps if you have a moment…"
"Well, maybe…"
"A quote for The Daily Prophet, sir?" a young man asked.
"What?"
"WILL EVERYONE PLEASE BE QUIET FOR A MOMENT?" Dumbledore's voice boomed above the quickly receding din. "Thank you. Zack, perhaps you should say a few words?"
Zack flushed. "Thank you. I'm frankly overwhelmed. I don't know what to say."
"Is it true you will be attending Hogwarts as a first-year, even though you are 33 years old?" the young man from The Daily Prophet asked.
"Yes, Headmaster Dumbledore convinced me that it would be best if I…"
"Are you saying he's forcing you to attend Hogwarts?"
"No! Not at all." Zack protested. I'm not ready for this.
"Why did you hide your magic all these years -- were you ashamed?"
"Ashamed? I didn't even know I had magic!" Zack said, his voice starting to rise.
Dumbledore interrupted firmly, "Perhaps it would be best if Zack were allowed to go home. Let's not forget he has only just recovered from severe injuries. If there are any questions, I will be happy to answer them." He smiled at the young reporter and motioned Zack to leave the room.
"Zack," a voice whispered behind him. It was Hermione. She motioned him to come back into the infirmary.
He walked away quickly, hoping that young reporter didn't follow him. "Thanks," he sighed with relief. "What the hell was that? And what is The Daily Prophet? I feel like I've been ambushed."
"Maybe you should go and lie down," she said looking him over.
"No I'm fine, just a little surprised, I guess."
"I will get a restorative potion just in case," Hermione said starting to walk back towards the hospital wing.
"No, I'm fine really…just a little surprised."
"I'm amazed it got out of hand like that. The Daily Prophet is the wizard newspaper, by the way. This reporter must be new," she said peeking out to see if the proceedings had finished.
"Why do you think he's new?"
"Well, a few years ago The Prophet had a reporter that made a living with half-truths and innuendo. The paper was forced to fire her." She gave a satisfied smile.
"Why are you smiling?" Zack asked curiously.
"Oh, nothing. Since then, it has been a fairly reputable paper. It looks like that may have changed."
"Well, then I guess I should thank you again for rescuing me." Zack noticed that she didn't have the robe on today and her dress was more appropriate for a hot day.
"Oh please," she said rolling her eyes and then peered out between the double doors. "It looks like they are starting to file out."
"Hold on a second." He said stopping her from opening the door. She looked at him quizzically. "You know I'm staying at the Weasley's for the next two weeks. Well, I was wondering if you might come and visit me – kind of a house call?" Lame…lame.
She stared at him for a moment. "Well see," she said, smiling a little. "I have a great deal of work to do before start of term, but maybe I could pop in…just to make sure you're not getting into any more trouble. Besides, I haven't been to the Burrow – that's what we call the Weasley's house—for a while. It would be nice to visit again," she finished with a far away look in her eyes.
"That would be great. Frankly, I'm a little nervous. Molly just walked in on me taking a bath, " Hermione started to laugh, "and Arthur practically had a relationship with my parent's water-sprinkler!" Hermione continued laughing and Zack chuckled along with her. Damn, she is beautiful.
Gathering herself, Hermione said, "You don't need to worry, Molly's a dear and Arthur is just eccentric when it comes to Muggle artifacts.' "You should ask him about his 'plug' collection." She smiled again.
Before Zack could respond, Hermione peered through the crack in the door and told him that Dumbledore was coming and opened the door for the Headmaster.
"Thank you Hermione for so adeptly removing Zack from that fiasco," Dumbledore said, striding into the room. He turned to Zack. "I must apologize. I didn't know that would happen. Cornelius assured me that having a reporter there would help quell the wild rumors that have been spreading."
"Wild rumors?"
"No need to worry. I believe I was able to satisfy them for now." For now -- that didn't sound reassuring. "Your family is outside in the car, ready to take you to your apartment. The Weasleys will meet you there and take you to their house."
"So…this is really happening?" Zack said nervously.
"Don't worry. You'll have a wonderful time at the Burrow. Who knows, maybe they'll have you de-gnome the garden for them?" Hermione said slyly. "I'll see you at Hogwarts in two weeks if I don't see you before. Take care." She then headed off back to the main part of the infirmary.
"Thanks for everything, I'll see you soon." I'll see you soon…lame.
"It's seems our Miss Granger has taken a liking to you," Dumbledore added with a twinkle in his eyes.
"You think so?" Zack said hopefully. Dumbledore walked Zack out the front door and bid him goodbye. "Wait a minute, one last question…what's a de-gnoming?"
Amused, Dumbledore said, "That's for me to know, and you to find out."
As soon as Zack opened the door to his apartment, Russell bounded over and loudly and repeatedly meowed at him.
"Okay, okay. I'm sorry, you're right. I deserve to be severely chastised." He picked up the cat and scratched her thoroughly and was rewarded with low, but loud, rumbles of approval. "I missed you too."
He looked around the flat and noticed how sad it looked. I can't believe I've lived here for almost eight years. It felt like a lifetime since he had been here.
"Well, you're home," his father announced, walking through the door with Zack's mother.
Zack turned. "I see you found a place to park."
"There was a vacant meter space just a block away."
Zack did not respond. He stood silently just inside the door facing away from his parents and moving his eyes around the flat. "I'm sorry for the mess. I wasn't expecting any visitors."
"This place is disgraceful…I bet you could make the cover of Bachelor Slob Monthly," his mother said flatly.
Zack slowly smiled, turned and then quickly hugged his mother. "Now THAT is the Mom I know!" he exclaimed as they both laughed.
"Well, I couldn't play the grief-stricken mother anymore. It was bad for my reputation."
"Enough, you two," Zack's father interrupted, looking at his watch. "The Weasleys will be here in a little over two hours, so I suggest we get a move on."
"Yes, sir," Zack cracked sharply and stood at attention. His father did not look amused.
They spent the next hour and 45 minutes cleaning. Zack built an impressive pile of used scrubs in the middle of the living room. "I think we can dispose of these," he said distastefully.
His mother turned around and looked disdainfully at the pile from the kitchen. "Don't you ever clean the kitchen?" his mother asked.
"Your bathroom is nothing to be proud of either," Zack heard his father add.
"Well…the hospital…and too tired," Zack mumbled, knowing he was only getting in deeper. His mother looked at him and shook her head as she took a bag of garbage out the front door. In the end, the place cleaned up pretty well. He was sure it was the cleanest it had ever been while he had lived here anyway. Zack was able to pack all of the belongings he felt he needed into two medium suitcases.
"What do you want us to do with the rest of the stuff?" his father asked.
"Well, I hadn't thought of that. I guess it doesn't make any sense to keep the place. Would you mind taking the stuff over to your house?" He asked trying to use his puppy-dog-eyes look.
His mother seemed unimpressed. "We've already arranged it. If you like, I suppose you could live with us during the breaks."
"Thanks. I hadn't thought of that either," Zack admitted and then looked nervously at his watch. I'm doomed.
"Well, I think you have a pretty good reason for being a bit flustered," his father said and reached out to pat him on the shoulder. Zack looked up and gave him a wry smile.
His mother chimed in. "This is not the end of the world, honey. Well, it might be, but don't forget that Elizabeth will be there to keep you out of trouble."
"You should have been a comedienne," Zack said, rolling his eyes and checking his watch again.
There was a knock on the door and Zack looked at both of his parents before stepping toward the door. I'm doomed. He opened the door and the Weasleys were there, both with ear-to-ear grins.
"You are looking so much better, dear," Molly said, stepping forward to pat him on the cheek.
"Yes, I have to agree you look amazingly well given the severity of your injuries," Arthur said while poking his head inside the apartment. A kid in a candy store, Zack thought amused. He noticed that Arthur was wringing his hands in anticipation.
"May we…have a look around?" Arthur asked excitedly.
"Arthur, behave yourself," Molly chastised him. "We have a great deal to do."
Zack suddenly remembered he hadn't checked his answering machine since he'd been back. "It's okay with me if he looks around. In fact, I need to check my phone messages before we go. That may take a few minutes."
Arthur was beside himself. "Phone messages? May I watch…please?"
Zack had to laugh at Arthur who was staring at him with eyes as big as saucers. "Let me review them first, because a few may be personal. After that I will show you the machine."
"Excellent, my boy, excellent." "Why don't we sit down and chat for a moment?" Zack's mother suggested. "You can fill us in on what you have planned for Zack. Would you like some tea? You do have tea Zack?"
I'm doomed. "Yes I have tea, Earl Grey, I think."
"And cups?" his mother added and then smiled at him.
"Yes, and cups." She can be such a pain in the neck sometimes.
His mother walked into the kitchen and Arthur was not far behind her. Zack headed into his bedroom. He saw the blinking light so he knew there was at least one message. The number six blinked on the machine. He played the first message—it was from Carrie asking him to call her and telling him she was naked. While that was a nice picture, it seemed like a decade ago, he thought to himself. He found her number in his wallet and decided to call her back, but she wasn't home. Just as well. He left her a nice message and told her he'd be somewhere without a phone for a while but would try to call her soon.
The second message was from the hospital, confirming what Dumbledore had told him at the hospital and inviting him to stay in touch. Mick and Barney had called as well, requesting his presence for another night of debauchery. They urged him to not stay away so long again. He called them but their machine said they took the Chunnel to Paris for a couple of days. C'est la vie. I'll call them er…or something, when I get settled.
The fourth message was Carrie again and the fifth message was a hang up.
The last call was very odd. He heard breathing and then a mumbled voice say something just before it disconnected. He turned up the volume to high and listened three more times. The voice was faint but it sounded like, "He's not there master." Or did he say mister?" Zack thought about having Arthur listen to the message, but decided against it. I'm just being paranoid – probably a telemarketer or something, he thought nervously. He erased the messages from Carrie, Barney and Mick, and the last one. He then opened the bedroom door and called Arthur to come in.
Arthur walked in looking around everywhere. "That's a lamp," he said pointing to his bedside table and looking very proud of himself.
"Yes, that's very good, Mr. Weasley."
"Please call me Arthur." Arthur spied the clock radio. "What is that?"
"It's a clock radio."
"A clockradio? I know of clocks and of radios, but what is a clockradio?"
"It's two words - clock and radio. It's a device that combines the functions of a clock with a radio." Seeing Arthur's dubious expression, he explained how Muggles use these devices to wake up in the morning instead of alarm clocks.
"Muggles are so fascinating…always making things smaller or better or faster or more convenient. I often wonder why they never seem to be satisfied."
Zack didn't know what to say to that so he remained silent. Arthur began to look around and spied the phone. "Ah yes, a telephone. I've used one of those before," he said confidently. "But what is that?" he asked pointing at the answering machine.
"That's the telephone answering machine I mentioned early."
"IS it? May I examine it?" Arthur asked while rubbing his hands together.
"Hit..er..press the announcement button." Zack suggested.
Arthur pressed the button and was astonished to hear Zack's voice. "How did you do that? Did you cast a Ventril quisto spell?"
"I'm sure I don't know what that is, but no. I told you, it's an answering machine." That didn't help at all. "I record my voice on a tape. When the phone rings—if I do not answer it—the machine answers the phone and plays my message." The look on Arthur's face reminded Zack of a confused dog. "The caller hears the message and leaves a…message."
"What is a tape?"
Zack spent the next several minutes explaining the purpose and workings of an answering machine, but not being technically adroit, he soon gave up. "You know what? I don't really know myself exactly how it works. But let's have some fun." Arthur looked at him questioningly and Zack smiled in return.
"ARTHUR, where are you? We need to go," Molly said, and walked into the room.
"Molly…it's me Arthur. I'm inside this machine."
Molly approached the answering machine warily. "Arthur you come out of there this instant!" She moved her face just a few inches from the machine. "What happened? You were here, what happened?" she said loudly to Zack wagging her finger.
"What is going on here?" Zack's mom said entering the room.
"Arthur is trapped inside this machine!" Molly said pointing at the answering machine.
"Zachary Flood, you end this charade immediately," his mother said sternly.
"Ahh, you're no fun. Arthur come on out the jig is up." Zack said with a raised voice. The closet door opened slowly and a grinning Arthur Weasley stepped out.
Molly looked exasperated. "I thought I was free of practical jokes when Fred and George left. I swear will you never grow up!"
"But Molly, it was just a little fun," Arthur protested but Molly did not appear to be placated.
"It's my fault Mrs. Weasley, don't blame Arthur." Zack gave her his sincere and apologetic look.
Molly turned towards Zack and still looked miffed, but once she saw the look on his face she started to look flustered and smiled. "You're a charmer you are," she said and put her hands to her face.
Putty in my hands. Zack then took a peek at his mother, who was glowering in his general direction. He acted like he didn't see her and turned towards Arthur. "Hey Arthur, would you like to have the machine?"
Arthur looked amazed at his offer. "Could I…you don't mind…Molly?"
"Can this thing hurt him?" Molly asked Zack.
"No, once it's disconnected from electricity it's harmless. But then again it won't work either. Arthur, you know once I unplug it, it won't work anymore?" He nodded.
"We'll just see about that," he said with an odd gleam in his eyes and clutched the answering machine to his chest.
"Arthur!" Molly said, her voice rising and tapping her foot. He looked at her with a guilty expression and she said, "You better not be thinking what I think you are thinking."
"I've learned my lesson, Molly," Arthur said, none too convincingly.
She just "chuffed" at him. "Let's go," she said, and left the room.
I'm doomed.
Zack and Arthur walked out of the bedroom. Zack's parents were near the door with Molly standing next to them, her arms crossed over her chest. Boy, the next two weeks should be a real hoot.
"Have you seen the cat?" Zack asked suddenly, looking around.
"She was on the windowsill in the kitchen a few minutes ago," his mom said, looking around as well.
Getting the cat into the cat-carrier was always as a chore. The last time Zack did it he had cat scratches that took over a week to heal. I believe a little subterfuge is called for, Zack thought, and walked into the kitchen. He pushed the electric can opener so it "whirred," but the cat was nowhere to be seen. Getting wise are we? All right then, it's time to bring out the heavy artillery. He opened the cabinet and removed a can of tuna from the shelf. He looked around and still didn't see the cat. He put the can under the can opener and started to open it. Is that a tail I see twitching under the sofa? Next, he put the tuna on a small plate, and, before he could put it on the floor, Russell came sprinting into the kitchen with a loud meow.
"You are so easy," Zack said, scratching the cat's head. Zack retrieved the carrier from the bedroom and was able to get the cat inside with only one scratched wrist.
It's time to go. Zack took one last look around and headed for the door. He gave his parents his keys, hugged his mom and shook his dad's hand. "Well, I guess this is it." He noticed that a bright-eyed and smiling Molly was watching him. She's just a big softy. He smiled back at her and they all walked out of the flat. His dad closed the door behind them.
Zack's parents said their goodbyes, promised to write, and walked off toward their car. He watched them go and then turned towards the Weasleys. Molly had her arm around Arthur's waist and Arthur had his arm around her shoulders. They were both looking at him with endearing looks on their faces. Zack's face turned a shade of pink. "Shall we go now?" They nodded in reply. "Where is your car?"
"Oh, we are not going by car," Arthur said and started walking. "The Ministry has a house nearby for use in…situations like this."
Help…I need somebody - help.
"We arranged for a Portkey to be set up." Molly said.
Portkey?
"Don't be worried, Zack. We've done it many times. Albus will be there to meet us as well," Arthur said trying to sound reassuring.
Zack had no idea what to say so he just walked along with them.
…and the condemned man slogged his last steps on the way to the gallows…
"There is the house now," Molly said pointing to a small row house tucked in behind a hotel.
It wasn't in very good condition and was very small. This does not fill me with confidence. But his jaw dropped open when they walked in and the house looked like a stylish five-bedroom mansion. He walked back outside and then came back inside. He repeated this several times while the Weasley's watched him patiently. Finally, Zack decided to get on with it and entered the house one more time, setting the cat crate down gently on the marble floor in the entryway.
"How is this so…so…big?" Zack managed to ask.
Mrs. Weasley smiled at him. "Magic, o' course. Don't worry dear, you'll get use to it."
Or I'll wake up in a mental institution.
"The Portkey is set to work at 3:30 PM, so we have half an hour to relax." Arthur announced looking at his timepiece. "I wonder where Albus is?" They all sat down and waited in silence.
"Zack, would you like to know what a Portkey is?"
"Sure. Why not?"
"How about I make us some tea while we wait?" Molly suggested.
'That would be nice, dear," Arthur said.
"Would you see if they have anything a bit stronger?" Zack asked.
"Tea is good for you, Zack." Molly lectured and quickly left the room.
Mothers. "That room over there looks like it might have something…do you mind?"
"You are a braver man than I. And no, I don't mind."
Zack walked across the hardwood floors to what looked like a study or a library. Floor-to-ceiling bookshelves covered the walls of the room, while a deep purple area rug with several chairs and a table on it occupied the center of the room. Very impressive…but where's the booze? He looked around, hoping the liquor wasn't hidden in some secret place. In one of the corners he noticed what looked like an old fashioned upright bar, and as he approached it he noticed it was made of beautifully hand-carved inlaid wood. He opened the doors and was rewarded with a vision of beautiful bottles filled to various heights with amber, clear, brown, and even black liquids. I think I'll skip the black one. He picked up one of the crystal decanters with a light colored amber liquid. He removed the stopper and took a tentative sniff.
"Whoa!" he said out loud.
"What was that Zack?" he heard Mr. Weasley call from the other room.
"I think I found what I was looking for," Zack said, eyeing the decanter appreciatively.
"That's good."
Zack took a small rocks glass from the shelf above the bottles and poured some of the "ambrosia" in the glass. Beautiful. Zack liked ale as much as the next guy…well, not if the next guy was Barney or Mick, but he adored a good single-malt Scotch. I wonder if this is whisky? Oh well, who cares? He took a drink and sighed in contentment at the intense burn. No sooner had the glass been emptied he refilled again. Now that feels so much better. He put the stopper back in the decanter and closed up the bar. He then walked back over to the sitting room.
"I believe we were discussing Portkeys?" Zack said, a good deal more relaxed.
Arthur eyed the glass suspiciously but said, "Ah yes, a Portkey is a device that will, at a pre-determined time, transport anyone touching it to a specific location. In this case, that location would be our house."
That actually sounded rational, in an irrational physics-doesn't-exist-anymore kind of way. "Thank you. That sounds, er…reasonable. What does a Portkey look like?"
Arthur responded, "It can be anything, because it's the spell that matters. For example, this answering machine could be a Portkey. However, usually they are worthless items, so the wrong person doesn't abscond with it." Arthur looked around suddenly at a sound behind him.
"I hope you are not referring to me, Arthur." Zack heard a silky baritone voice say from the direction of the front door.
"Severus, is that you?" Arthur asked. "I didn't hear the front door open."
"That's because it was carelessly left open."
Zack knew he forgot to close the door, but for some reason didn't really care. He looked up to see a man come into the sitting room. Dressed all in black with shiny black hair and pale skin, the man was carrying a Raggedy Ann doll. He didn't look very happy. In fact, he looked like he had an upset stomach. Zack guessed his age at around 40.
"Please take this," he said, carelessly tossing the rag doll to Arthur.
"Where is Albus?" Arthur asked.
"Ministry business. I was compelled to fill in at the last minute. Apparently, Minerva is still on her spa vacation."
I wonder why Arthur is so flustered? Zack thought, taking another sip from his drink. The man looked at him but said nothing. What an asshole.
"Well, this has been fascinating, but I have better things to do," Severus said, turning towards the door.
"Did I hear the door?" Molly said as she entered the room. Seeing Severus she burst into tears, ran to him, and hugged him fiercely. The man looked like a trapped animal.
"Please Molly. Let me go. I do not hug." The man struggled in vain to free himself and finally gave up, standing resignedly in her embrace.
Between sobs, she stammered, "Y.y.y.you…you…ss.s.s. saved my s.s.s.son."
"Molly, really, this is most unbecoming. I did what I had to do," Severus said, looking at Zack for the first time and then back to Arthur. "Arthur, can't you do something?"
"Are you kidding?"
"How about you then?" He asked, looking and speaking to Zack for the first time.
"Now you speak to me? You're on your own."
Finally Molly finally loosened her grip on Severus, and he disentangled himself with all the grace he could muster.
"Why have you been avoiding us?" Molly asked him, her eyes all puffy. "We owe you so much for what you did for…for…Ron."
"I did what I had to do. I need no thanks or recognition," he answered, smoothing out his black jacket and pants.
This guy is so full of shit. Who was he kidding?
"What do you have there?" Severus asked Zack, indicating the glass he was holding.
"To be honest, I have no idea. But it's damn good," Zack answered, taking another sip.
"May I see it?" Severus asked, walking over to Zack.
He certainly was tall enough, Zack noticed. "Certainly," Zack responded handing him the glass. The man looked at it and gave it sniff.
"Old Ogden's 100 year is my guess," Severus said arrogantly. "Fetch me a glass."
"My name is Zack Flood, if you were wondering," Zack supplied, getting up a little unsteadily.
"I was not wondering. However, if you must know, my name is Severus Snape, Professor of the Study of the Dark Arts at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."
"Hogwarts? I'll be attending there this year."
"Surely you must be joking? Are you some kind of visiting professor from America then?" he said with distaste.
What a pompous ass. "No - a student."
"Ah yes, now I remember. The Headmaster mentioned something about an older student being admitted this year. I take it you are he."
"Yes, I am he," Zack answered with a bow, and started to head back to the library. He stopped and turned. "You might want to cool it with the attitude a bit. Your act is getting a little thin." Zack smiled and continued into the library to get the drink. He swore he could feel the steam coming from Snape's ears. Damn, this stuff must be stronger than it looks!
When he returned he saw a red-faced Snape and a very nervous looking Molly and Arthur.
Molly walked up to Zack. "You should be nice to the Professor. He saved my son's life and he will be one of your professors at Hogwarts next year."
Well, I never did like things easy, Zack thought. He gave the fuming Snape his drink and said, "My apologies, good sir. A pox upon me for a clumsy lout." Zack laughed at himself.
Snape took a good size swig of his drink, and then said in very measured tones, "How many of these have you had?"
"This is my third…I think." Zack sat down and noticed he was having trouble focusing his eyes for some reason.
"I assume this is your first time drinking Old Ogden's?" Snape said with amusement.
Zack nodded and Snape smiled. I think I like him better as the asshole.
Molly faced turned as red as her hair. "Arthur Weasley!" Arthur cringed. "How could you let him have Old Ogden's? And this his first time using a Portkey!" She was shouting and waggling her finger at him. "You know what will happen! I swear I can't leave you alone for even a minute! And don't think I'm ignoring you either," Molly said turning toward Zack.
Zack just smiled at her and finished his drink. "I think I'll get one more," he said, and tried not too successfully to get up. "I think maybe my legssh are broke."
"You have had quite enough!" Molly said, and walked over to take his glass. She looked at him and slowly started to shake her head.
Snape watched the entire scene with a look of mirth on his face. "If he were not drunk, I would be most…unhappy. However, because he will likely remember little of this…and will suffer a good deal tomorrow," he smiled again, "I see no reason to hold his impertinent comments against him." He finished his drink and gave the glass back to Molly. "I am leaving now. Molly…Arthur, I consider myself duly thanked."
Zack thought he saw the man in black leave. Who was that?
"Molly?" Arthur asked tentatively.
"What is it?" she responded.
"It's 3:28 PM, we need to get everything together."
"We only have two minutes!" she shouted. She ran the glasses into the kitchen and quickly returned. "You know I hate leaving a place untidy – Arthur you should have spoken up sooner."
"Yes dear…one minute."
"Grab the bags. I'll get the cat." She walked over grabbed the cat crate a bit roughly.
"MEOW!" Russell spoke up in protest.
"Zack, ZACK!" a red-haired lady shouted at him.
"Yessh" he slurred, looking bleary-eyed.
"Oh dear…hold on to this doll, okay," she directed.
"Pretty doll, yes?" Zack said, holding the doll in his arms. Arthur, holding the two suitcases and his clock radio, and Molly, with the cat carrier, stood practically on top of Zack, who was still sitting on the chair. They each had a hold of one of the doll's legs.
"Ready?" Arthur said, looking at his timepiece.
"For what?" Zack asked. But before anyone could answer, he felt a massive lurch and he suddenly found himself sitting on grass.
"Well, we're home," Molly announced. "How do you feel Zack?"
Zack's head was spinning and his stomach was displeased. "I don't feel so good," he mumbled and rolled over onto his knees. He crawled over to a promising looking shrub and heaved up his guts.
"I knew this would happen," he heard Molly say behind him. "Well, don't just stand there…take the bags inside. I think he will be a while."
"Yes dear," Arthur replied.
"I hope you learned your lesson dear," Molly said, walking over and tenderly removing a twig from Zack's hair.
Zack responded by heaving again into the bushes. Before he passed out, he could have sworn he saw little men yelling at him from between the branches.
My thanks to Crow, Juliane, and Lillith for all their help.
Thanks also to all who have reviewed. Additional comments would be most appreciated.