A/N: hey any ideas, questions, suggestions, or confusion, fell free to ask!

Enjoy! I DON'T OWN INUYASHA!

Ok so...here's a new chapter!

Chapter 18- Leaving This Behind

She was brushing Rin's hair. She loved grooming the young girl's hair from time to time. It reminded her of when she was a child and her mother would brush her hair before she would tuck her in. Then she stopped brushing suddenly. There was a cry. But it sounded like a baby's cry. Its wailing could be heard from far throughout the castle walls. She told Rin to stay there. She wanted to see who it was. The need to know why the child was crying was drawing her to it. She felt its pain calling to her.

Walking through the halls and corridors, she could feel herself getting closer to the source. The wails becoming louder and louder. Finally, she stopped outside of a door. The cries seemed to be coming from the room beyond this door. Slowly, she opened the door and examined what appeared to be an infant beneath a white sheet. She could identify its small limbs thrashing beneath the cloth. Cautiously, she crept towards the child, but as she did so...its cries seemed to be getting lower and lower. When she was standing directly in front of it, she kneeled down and attempted to pick it up. She realized that the cries had stopped. Her eyes widened at what she held in her arms.

Nothing. Just the white sheet.

"What have you done?"

A startled gasp escaped her mouth as the bone chilling voice reached her ears. She turned her head and looked up. Her eyes met with a pair of golden ones that flared with intense anger and pain. She looked at her demon lord, her puzzled expression meeting his stone glare. He was angry, yet he seemed hurt, she hadn't a clue as to why. What did she do?

She turned her attention back at what was in her arms. Her breath caught in her throat upon looking at the horrific site before her. Blood. It was everywhere. The once spotless sheet was now drenched in it, as was the floor below her. A strangled cry emitted from her mouth. She wanted to scream, but found she could not. What had she done indeed. She violently discarded the bloodied cloth and backed up into the being behind her. Once again she turned her up to look at him. But this time his eyes no longer held pain. Only pure anger and hatred.

She stammered while trying to speak. "S-Sesshomaru?" That was all she could muster. His burning gaze left her paralyzed and weak. She couldn't even stand. Her body began to tremble as a growl so vicious permeated from his body the whole room vibrated.

"Look what you've done you wretch! You have destroyed our child! MY child!" he snarled bitterly through his teeth. "With your weak human emotions." His fists were clenched tightly and his eyes, for a brief moment, flashed blood red. She was afraid...for her life. And she had good reason too, as she watched his hand flex as if to grab her small, delicate throat and snap it.

Suddenly she did something that she had never done in her life. She pleaded for him to spare her."Sesshomaru forgive me! Please don't kill me! I-I didn't know...I would never harm my child!" she screamed as she cried, her tiny fists clutching onto his silk pants now stained with red from the blood on her hands.

A vile grin formed on his face as he reached down and grabbed her by the back of her neck, raising her up to his height leaving her feet to dangle above the floor. He brought her face closer to his. At first she thought he was going to kiss her, but he simply brought his mouth to her ear and whispered into it with a venomous tone. "Pathetic human. You are nothing to me anymore. I have no use for a weak human such as you!" He threw her on the floor, hard. She screeched in pain as her body was slammed to the ground. As she struggled to get up, her eyes swelled in tears as she witnessed the scene before her.

There stood Sesshomaru embraced in the arms of Lady Shiva. "Look at her Sesshomaru, she weeps, such a weak emotion prone only to humans." The ice demon smirked at her as she placed her lips upon the dog demon. Sesshomaru turned to her with narrowed eyes. "Murderer, I expect you to be gone from my home before nightfall. If I return to find you still moping around here, I will kill you."

The term he used to address her with stayed with her as he exited the room with that slut.

Murderer...

Murderer...

MURDERER!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Lana screamed as she jolted up violently from her bed. She panted heavily, bring her hand to rest on her sweaty forehead. 'It was a dream... no, a nightmare.' she had hoped that it all was simply a nightmare...but upon looking at her hand and noticing the absence of her claws, she was faced with the truth. But something about her form was strange. Lana took a lock of her hare and observed it. It was slightly wavy, black with a red hue. That was the color of her hair in her demon form. 'But how?' She broke away from her thoughts when the door clicked and someone entered.

Sesshomaru had hurried to her room upon hearing her yell, worried that the dark hanyou had returned for revenge. He had known that Naraku would not simply forget what happened. He had been humiliated, having begged for his pathetic life in front full blooded demon lords. That was something not even Inuyasha would do, under any circumstances.

Lana slowly turned her head and stared at him. Her eyes looked tired, her skin pale as if the blood had ran from her body. "Sesshomaru." she barely whispered. If he did not have a demon's keen sense of hearing he would not have heard her. "I'm fine. Please...come sit down." She looked at him with pleading eyes "Please."

He was hesitant at first, he knew that she had heard everything the night before. He nodded and made his way over to the bed to sit beside her. She didn't look at him. She simply stared at her lap and placed her hands in it. She wanted to avoid looking at him because she knew she'd cry. She nearly cried as she felt the bed sink in with his weight. But she held back the tears, she'd hold them until her eyes could hold no more and flooded over. Lana took a deep breath, hoping that it would prepare her for what ever answers she may get.

"So...is it true?" Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at her question. "Is what true." Lana's jaw tightened and her fists were clenched tightly in her lap."Is it true...that I was...pregnant?" she said through clenched teeth.

Sesshomaru did not answer her right away. He turned to face the window and stared at the trees. They were almost completely bare, a clear indication of the approaching winter season. He sighed lightly. "Yes...you were."

Her bottom lip trembled. "So you knew? And you didn't tell me?" Her voice cracked.

He looked at her, her head still staring into her lap. Feeling a pain of guilt for not telling her. "I refrained from telling you due to the fact that I was uncertain how you would react. Also because..." he paused for a moment. "I was planning on surprising you with it during the banquet. It was a part of the celebration."

Lana didn't know what in the world was going in her mind at the time but she just snapped. She raised her hand and slapped him across the face with as much strength that she had. "You idiot! You didn't think that I had a right to know! That I was fucking pregnant!" she screamed. He held his usual composure, not even flinching at her words. "So everyone there knew? Even Naraku!" Her body quivered uncontrollably. Sesshomaru pulled her to him and embraced her affectionately, not saying a word. But Lana wasn't done and began a verbal assault on herself as she sobbed into his chest. The remembrance of her dream still haunting her."Not only did I kill my child, I'm human now...completely. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. If I had known that I was...it would have never happened the way it did. Please don't hate me. Please don't abandon me."

Her words struck him like blade to his chest. He had never handled a woman this way before and hadn't a clue as to how to console them, especially verbally. He too was hurting from the lost of his unborn pup. Their child. If anyone was to blame it was him, and even he, a demon lord, would admit that. He placed a kiss on her head softly and stroked her hair. "You are right. I should have told you. I'm sure things would have been different." he whispered, thinking that had been the right thing to say.

It had been far from the right thing to say. Lana couldn't believe her ears. She didn't expect him to say that and it broke her heart. He merely admitted that if he had told her, then things would have been different. Not much of a sincere comment to her. Perhaps he simply...did not care how she felt. How she was falling apart on the inside. Maybe he would abandon her after all.

Sesshomaru released her and stood up. "You should rest. I'll be departing soon to assist the other lords in search of Naraku and Prince Ifrit. I want you to stay in this room while I am gone. I shall be away for a few days, perhaps weeks. I have my men stationed around the area to protect the castle. Kimiko will be here to serve you and provide you with any essentials you may need." He smiled weakly at her, then turned to head out of the room, leaving Lana sitting in the bed dumbfounded. Although her heart was broken, she still did not let one tear fall.

Sesshomaru walked out of his castle, wearing his armor and the evil demonic sword Tokijin at his side. He could see Lord Leviathan waiting for him at the front gate. He nodded at his friend and they headed off to where they thought they may find their targets. He would kill Naraku with his bare hands for what he did.

Lana stared outside the window, watching the leaves fall one by one. 'Winter isn't too far away.' she thought. But Lana's mind was far from the upcoming cold season. She was in a state of turmoil. A few months ago, she wouldn't have given a damn about Sesshomaru throwing her aside. She had prayed for it. But now...

Kimiko had entered the room. She had brought Lana some food and water. "My Lady." she greeted Lana in an unusual cold tone of voice.

Lana attempted to smile. "What is it Kimiko?"

The young demoness walked towards the side of the bed and kneeled before her. "I simply want to express my condolences my Lady. To you and my Lord." Kimiko stood and sat beside Lana on the bed. "I know that the future may be hard, but I shall be here to keep you company and the little one as well."

Lana blinked in confusion. "Uh well thank you...Kimiko. But what do you mean? I know that what happened was tragic...but how will it make the future hard for me?"

Kimiko looked at Lana with sad eyes. "Forgive me my Lady. I understand that you and Lord Sesshomaru had been...getting closer, but I'm afraid that things may be different now."

Lana was completely baffled. "Different how?" She realized that Kimiko knew Sesshomaru better than she had. She was both anxious and reluctant to find out how he would handle her 'situation'.

Kimiko continued to 'fill her in'. "My lord is not as patient as he seems. You see, he is in need of an heir. If you remain the way you are, a human, he will set out elsewhere for someone of demon blood to sire a child with. His honor will not allow him to abandon you, however, you are still his mate, unless he chooses another to be his mate."

Lana 's breath caught in her throat. A few seconds pasted before she was able to respond to what Kimiko had said. "So..." she said hesitantly. "He'll just keep me here? Locked away...while...while he goes and finds some...other demon woman to bear him a full-blooded demon child?"

Kimiko nodded."I don't know my lady. But it is a possibility."

Lana swallowed hard, turning her head to face the window. "When do you think he will be back?"

Kimiko thought for a moment. "Not for a few wee...um not for a few days."

Because her head was turned, Lana could not see the corner of Kimiko's mouth curve up. Lana sighed. What was she going to do? "Kimiko if you don't mind...I'd like to be left alone." she said softly.

"Yes my Lady." she bowed and exited the room, leaving Lana confused. She called her 'my lady'?

On the other side of the door Kimiko walked down the halls. 'Hn, stupid fool. So easy to manipulate.' She had made her way outside of the castle and had begun to walk into the forest. 'Humans are so weak. They should all perish. Die slow, painful deaths by the hands of all demons. I cannot believe Lord Sesshomaru would dare keep them in his house.' She stopped once she was a good enough distance from the castle. 'Now I can return to my beautiful form.' Her hair turned blue, along with her eyes, her skin a pale blue as if she were dead. The lady of the north smirked as her plan had been set. "Soon I, Lady Shiva, will get what is rightfully mine!" she laughed out loud. 'I think I'll help this years cold season speed up a bit.' she mused.

Lana took her blue backpack and began to stuff as much junk food and bottled water as she could in it. The temperature outside was decreasing. She needed warm clothes. 'Dammit. These kimonos won't keep me warm.' Just then the 'real' Kimiko walked into the room.

"Lana is there something wrong? I heard rustling?" She looked at Lana's packed bags. "Are you...going somewhere?"

"Kimiko! Great! I know I asked you to leave but never mind that. Um do you know if there are any warm clothing in the castle?" Lana asked.

Kimiko looked at her strangely. "But I just entered your room just now."

Lana hadn't heard her because she was busy searching the chests full of clothes. "Aha! Here they are." she exclaimed. She had found some wool robes so she decided to put them on over the clothes she already had on. Kimiko stood there completely confused. "Lana are planning on departing?" Lana looked up at her. Her eyes softened and she put on a fake smile. "I'm leaving Kimiko." she said as she zipped up her backpack. "I'm leaving and I am never coming back."

Kimiko gasped. "Leaving? But why?"

Lana stopped moving for a moment. "I can't stay anymore. I won't just let him keep me here to just waist away. He doesn't need me here...I'm doing him a favor." She walked out onto the balcony and climbed over the railing, grabbing onto the vines that had grown on the stone walls.

Kimiko ran out to her. "But Lana...Lord Sesshomaru will not simply let you escape. He'll search for you, relentlessly. You know how possessive inuyoukai are! Please I beg of you do not leave!"

Lana smiled at her warmly. "I know Kimiko. But no matter how far he searches he will not find me. I'm going home...to my time period. So tell him...not to waste his time." She had begun to climb down when hesitated. "Kimiko." "Yes Lana." "Tell Rin that I'm sorry...and thank you...for being a good friend to me." And with that she made her way down the wall and proceeded to the forest. 'I hope I don't get lost trying to find the village without my powers. At least it hasn't snowed yet so I should pretty much get there by memory.' Lana hoped to herself. She was about twenty feet from the castle when she turned back to get one last glance. 'Goodbye Sesshomaru.'

Meanwhile...a few days later.

"It has been days Sesshomaru." sighed a very irritated Lord Leviathan.

Sesshomaru glanced at him expressionless. "Must continue on."

The dragon lord smiled at his friend sympathetically. "We have not one clue as to the whereabouts of Naraku. We cannot even reach Prince Ifrit. The castle of the fire mountain is inside a moat of magma. It would not be wise for us to invade as of yet, the fire lord's people are known for effectively manipulating the element of fire." He walked up to old friend and placed his hand on his shoulder. "I understand my friend. You want to ensure the complete safety of your home, but why don't you return to your castle. Our allies and myself will formulate a plan on how and when we will make our move. Your mate needs you. Now that she is human, she is more fragile, more...emotional. Go to her."

Sesshomaru's gaze was focused to the west. He contemplated what his friend had said. She did need him. He had left her with the belief that he would abandon her. He would never abandon her. As her mate he was her master, her lover, her protector. She gave up her former life for an eternity with him, in exchange for her friend's life. He vowed to himself that he would honor her act, for it was indeed honorable. She would stay by his side, forever. He would not abandon her, nor cast her aside. Her future was with him and he would give her one. He found it strange...yet amusing that he still wanted her. Maybe his father's genes were stronger in other areas besides strength and looks.

"Very well, Leviathan. I shall return to my lands. You will inform me at once on any information you obtain," he said. His words being a declaration.

Leviathan nodded. "Of course. Best of luck handling a human woman Sesshomaru," he laughed mockingly.

Sesshomaru gave him a warning glare. "Hn. This Sesshomaru hand take on any challenge," he stated with his natural confidence. He turned west and proceeded home.

Leviathan chuckled to himself. "Battling female emotions and battling wars are two different leagues my friend. Far from similar."

Lana cursed to herself as she walked through the trees. "Dammit! Just my luck that it would start snowing now!" She was starting to get nervous now. "I should have at least come across a village or something by now...man I'm starving." She continued onward. Her clothes were snagged, torn, and ripped by the bushes and branches. The temperature dropped at least ten degrees. On top of that...she was lost.

'Maybe leaving in the winter wasn't the best thing to do.' she thought to herself.

Sesshomaru arrived at his castle in less than two days, thanks to his cloud. As he entered his castle he walked to the direction of his chambers. There were things that he and his mate needed to discuss, like their future. He took notice that as he walked by all of the servants were very quiet, more than normal anyway. They just stood there.

Sesshomaru stopped suddenly when he passed by Rin's room. He had smelt salt and water. She had been crying. He opened the door to see Rin crying in Kimiko's lap. Something didn't seem right. Why was Kimiko comforting Rin and not Lana? Perhaps she was resting. Yes that must be it. He turned and made his way to his chambers. He gently opened the door, so that he would not wake her if she was sleeping. Little did he know...

"Lana?" he called in a cool voice. No she was not here. Her scent was not in the room...it wasn't in the castle for that matter. "Kimiko!" he called out. Less than three seconds later she was their kneeling before her lord on the hard floor. "You called my lord." she spoke softly.

"Where is she? Where is Lana?" he said sternly. He was becoming irritated. She had left the castle without his permission. She had defied him.

Kimiko flinched when her lord's demand reached her ears. She breathed out bravely, raising her head to look him in the eye. Hopefully her lord would be merciful enough not to 'kill the messenger'. "My lord forgive me but...my lady has left."

His nostrils flared as he became even more annoyed. "I know that!" he said, his fists tightening. "Her scent is gone. Now tell me where she is!" he barked, the whole castle shook.

Kimiko's hands gripped the cloth of her kimono at her knees. She was scared to tell him. It may be the last thing she would ever say. "My lady has left...you my lord. She...has gone to her home. She said...she was not going to return...ever. My lady also said not to come for her..."

Sesshomaru had wrapped his hand around Kimiko's small neck. "You allowed this?" He hissed through his fangs. Kimiko cried. "My lord I beg your mercy but I knew not what to do. I did not wish to defy my lady's wishes...I am as loyal to her as to you. She requested that I not stand in her way."

He dropped her unceremoniously. He would not kill her for obeying, regardless how much he wanted to. "Leave."

Kimiko did not hesitate to do as she was told and quickly left the room. Sesshomaru slowly walked to his chair and sat in silence. His thoughts were focused in the situation. She had left him. Simply took off with no intention of returning. A wicked grin formed on his face as he stood and proceeded to gather his swords.

He would show her. He would not allow her to break her promise to him. Her life was his. SHE was HIS! And if she thought that she could simply leave him, dishonor their pact, break their bonding as mates...then she was sadly mistaken.

Next Chapter: In The Hands Of My Enemy

summary: A fierce blizzard is raging. Lana is attacked and as a result is severely injured. She is rescued by ? and is taken to the home of her savior. Meanwhile, Sesshomaru is searching for his renegade mate and finds out just where she is. Not to mention a certain evil hanyou happens to be closer than everyone thinks.