Nagi laughed.
He laughed. The bastard! How could he laugh at a time like this? And it was not one of the laughs he had grown to treasure, either. Those had been rare and cherished, a true laugh, starting somewhere in the man's belly, usually slowed by an attempt to stifle it, then finally escaping in a surprised spurt of joy. No, this was not one of those laughs. This was a cold, heartless laugh, one that brought back memories of years past that made Omi's skin crawl.
He should have seen this coming. Over the past weeks, Nagi had grown more distanced, more withdrawn. After all the opening up the pair had done, Omi had to watch Nagi as he had once again closed himself off, showing fewer and fewer emotions. In the past week, he had even refused to call him 'Omi' as he had always done when they were alone. Even last night over dinner, it had been Momaru that Nagi was speaking to, not Omi.
Can't you see that I'm sick of this?
Chances are you're oblivious to how I feel
Sitting on your throne, and I'm sure I'm not alone
"What are you saying?" Omi finally managed, trying for a tone he used when conducting a business negotiation, and failing miserably. Just enough of the confused and jumbled emotions he was feeling escaped into his words to ruin the effect. Nagi's cold laughter ceased abruptly, his face reverting to the cut-from-stone look that Omi had worked so hard to erase over the past two years.
"Have you not been listening? You have been used, Momaru. Rosenkreuz now has all the information they need to easily defeat Kritiker. All this time, and you never even suspected it. Did you honestly believe that such a profound change could be sincere? I am Schwarz, Momaru, and always will be."
Tell me please
Who the fuck did you want me to be?
Was it something that I couldn't see?
Never knew this would be so political
Omi felt as if all the air had been sucked from his lungs. He felt that his heart even stopped beating, that his brain functions ceased for a single moment before both kicked into overdrive. Heart racing and adrenaline pumping, Omi shot up from the office chair he had been sitting in, glaring down at Nagi, who was seated calmly on the other side of the desk.
"You cannot tell me that the man I have known for the past two years--" The man I fell in love with, damn it, he added silently, "does not exist!" For a moment Omi thought he saw something flicker in Nagi's emotionless eyes, almost as if he had heard those unspoken words. But just as soon as the change registered in Omi's mind, it was gone, and Nagi's eyes were once again a cold, unfeeling blue as he spoke in a monotone.
"Believe what you will about that man's existence, Momaru. But if he did indeed ever live, believe me now when I tell you that he is dead."
And please, I'm still wearing this miserable skin
And it's starting to tear from within
But its obvious that doesn't bother you
So please