A/N: Translation convention update w/r/t this chapter – all dialogue in German unless specified otherwise by /text/.

Tournee und Kuchen.
Chocolate is not the answer. Chocolate is the question. Yes is the answer.
~

"Hey, you better not be freaking out about period stuff."

I blinked, surfacing, and met Asuka's eyes in the bathroom mirror.

She gestured to the sink counter, where sat a box of sanitary napkins. "Misato said that the first time Shinji saw a pack of tampons in the bathroom at her place, he squeaked like a mouse."

I imagined this, and smiled.

"He'd gotten better by the time I moved in, even knew her brands and stuff for when he did the shopping. Lucky for him – I've got no patience for guys making a fuss about a perfectly natural process. If anyone should be complaining it's us, 'cause we're the ones who have to deal with having them, and they suck. Ask any girl – well, not Ayanami apparently, lucky her – she was asking me what they're like, as though she's missing out or something! So not her. Or, y'know, girls without this stuff—" she gestured to her lower torso, before returning to her contention. "But ask anybody else. Extreme suckage."

It was unclear to me why this would be in doubt, human physiology being as shambolic it was (even in my limited experience), but nodded to show agreement and solidarity.

"Correct response. You've earned the antidote … for today."

I grinned. Asuka had insisted that I stay at her home while recovering from the battle at Berlin NERV – and indeed, we both had slept most of the day and overnight – but that did not mean she was going to coddle me.

"So if that's not the reason for the thousand-yard stare…" She joined me at the counter; the bathroom door had been open, enabling her to catch sight of my frozen regard as she passed along the hall. "Still rattled from the fight yesterday morning?"

I returned my gaze to my reflection, where a moment ago I had seen – as clearly as if it were real – the jagged gaping wound in my throat that the mimic Lance of Longinus had inflicted on Unit 09.

The skin now was clear and unmarked, and I touched my fingers to it with a shiver.

"Ooh, phantom pain?" Asuka gave a sympathetic shudder. "Me too, after that asshole got first blood on Unit 06. It's better now, but last night I woke up like six times with twinges. Not my first rodeo, though – when that clown-faced Angel chopped off both of Unit 02's arms, mine were going numb on and off for hours after."

Gently I touched her wrist.

She frowned, but at her own reflection, rather than recoiling from me. "When we fought Unit 03, Ayanami's arm got blown off, too. I wonder if she ever got phantom pains? Was it worse, knowing the Commander ordered it – basically her own parent?"

She winced, and clutched her shoulder for a moment, then met my eye again. "It'll pass, Wonderboy, don't worry. Just one of those things we go through for defending humanity. Sucks for now, but it fades after a while, you just gotta be patient."

I took her hand and squeezed briefly, and she rolled her eyes.

"If Shinji-baka was here to see you sleazing he'd be broken-hearted."

It was my turn to roll my eyes, and defiantly give her hand an extra squeeze.

"Ew, gross."

Another voice, in summons: "Asuka! Kaworu! Breakfast is ready!"

We headed downstairs, where Asuka's stepmother was setting the table with a dazzling array of foods – jams and pastries, sausages of many kinds, breads both sweet and savoury, and what looked like half the cheesemonger's stock.

Asuka's eyes gleamed covetously. "Wow Mother, is it Christmas already?"

Ms Langley tucked mouse-brown bangs behind her ears nervously. "Well, I wasn't sure what your friend might like." Magnified by round rimless glasses, her eyes showed fond anxiety for her stepdaughter's response, and I recalled overhearing their phone call after Third Impact, and Ms Langley's audible sobs of relief at Asuka's survival.

In that same phone call, of course, she had shared the news that her husband – Asuka's stepfather, the man formerly married to Kyoko – had not survived. The empty space left by him in their home was apparent even to me, a stranger, but he was mentioned as little as possible, I suspected in order to spare me the social discomfort of their grief.

"Plus," Ms Langley added, "your Aunt Ingrid sent over those poppyseed Hörnchen you like."

"When I was six," Asuka protested, then hesitated. "Where are they?"

"In the oven, warming up."

"Good."

Ms Langley turned to me. "Do you like Hörnchen, Kaworu? Or do you prefer sweet rolls?"

I tried to gesture to indicate that both were welcome.

"I told you, Mother," Asuka interjected, "he's still in shock from the battle. Can't talk yet."

"Oh yes, that's right. I'm sorry, dear," she said to me; "that must have been so terrible."

I nodded, with a grimace.

"Stuff him full of food, that's the real German therapy," Asuka decreed. I made a thumbs-up sign for her.

"That reminds me," said Ms Langley, "these arrived for you both this morning." From the refrigerator she extracted two amber bottles. "You can have them with food, they said."

"Who said?"

"Doctor Gäng at NERV headquarters." She passed Asuka the smaller of the vessels. "Apparently it should clear out those inner-ear issues you were finding at your higher synchronisation ratios." She pronounced the (apparently carefully-memorised) words clearly.

To me she offered the other bottle, whose label was printed with a mix of Latin lettering and Japanese characters. "They made this at the onsite pharmacy last night, under instruction by your base's Doctor Akagi."

My expression must have been entirely transparent to my distaste, because she faltered. "They said ... that she said … it would help you settle back into your own neurological system and promote…" she concentrated on recall; "synaptic reintegration."

With an effort I banished the distrust from my face, and accepted the bottle. Even had I not been struggling with communication, how could I have explained myself? Or justified refusing treatment for a genuine issue? "I'm sorry, but I don't appreciate the suppression of my Angelic powers and extrasensory perception, and as such choose to decline this medication."

Asuka misinterpreted my hesitance to apparently match her own concern. "This better not ruin our appetites or make us nauseous – it'd be criminal to waste all this!" She gestured at the repast before us.

Ms Langley smiled. "I asked about that, and Doctor Gäng said it should be fine."

"It better." Satisfied, Asuka emptied her medicine into a glass of juice and drank deeply. After she handed back the empty bottle, Ms Langley turned an expectant look to me.

No chance of faking, then. I did the same, more hesitantly.

Once more the muffling shroud descended and I clutched the edge of the table to ground myself. Another part of my light felt drained away, stifled from me though I reached for it in my very soul, and tears of frustration simmered behind my eyes.

"Hey. Hey Wonderboy – Earth to Kaweirdo."

Someone was shaking my shoulder, and I felt my other hand lifted and a vessel placed in it.

"Can you drink this, Kaworu?"

It was raised to my mouth, and cold clear water shocked my senses back to themselves. The weighted cloud lifted, and Ms Langley's concerned expression swam into focus.

"Kaworu?"

I swallowed again and blinked, alertness mostly returned.

"Feeling better?"

Careful of the vestigial throbbing fuzz behind my eyes, I nodded.

Her face relaxed. "Oh, I'm glad. Take it easy, all right?"

As Ms Langley returned to her own seat, Asuka remarked, "Doctor Akagi's not subtle, is she?"

I glanced at her sharply.

"About containing side effects from the stuff she doses. I'm pretty sure she thinks us pilots are just little yammering machines."

A voiceless chuckle made my chest swim, but the sensation faded momentarily and I was able to focus on breakfast.

Asuka had been joking but correct – the hospitable spread was as restorative and comforting as any medication, and we both stuffed ourselves extravagantly (Asuka joked about "self-sabotage", but to no visible effect on her choices of consumption). Ms Langley seemed pleased with our appetites, and repeatedly offered to replenish or obtain additional foods – Asuka promptly asked for coffee, but was told "not until you're sixteen, it'll stunt your growth"; her pout in response was adorably childish, and inadvertently validated her stepmother's decision.

Eventually we all sat back, satiated, and sipped our drinks as the food settled. I gave a contented sigh, and wiped my mouth with a serviette.

"So what do you have planned for today?" Ms Langley asked.

Asuka stifled a yawn. "Well, I don't have to go into HQ, since Unit 06 has a lot of repairs scheduled and I'm on R&R leave. But—" she looked at me sideways, "I don't think Kaworu's seen Berlin NERV before…"

I shook my head – my German residency had been at Hamburg site, and most of it deep underground in the blackout zone. Almost none of the workforce there had had any idea that an Angel resided beneath and alongside them.

"Did you fancy a tour, then?"

I nodded.

"Bor-ring. But I guess since you're all sad and suffering, we can go. Before that, though, we're heading into the city to see some fun stuff – no argument! Not that you can right now," she smirked.

"Asuka!" admonished Ms Langley.

I stole and swiftly drank the remainder of Asuka's juice, and she swore at me – in Japanese, so her stepmother would not understand, though a disapproving look indicated Ms Langley suspected the impropriety.

We made it to the front door without actual violence. I had been loaned a t-shirt belonging to Asuka's stepsister, Nina, currently away at university, as the kit brought from Japan only included my school uniform, which was deemed far too formal; it fit reasonably well, and featured a band logo I did not recognise but that made Asuka snicker.

As we were putting our shoes on Asuka suddenly rummaged in the pockets of her short overalls. "Ach, crud – be right back!" She dashed upstairs.

Ms Langley passed me an umbrella. "Here, the forecast says rain."

I smiled my thanks, and she hesitated a moment; glanced to see that her stepdaughter was not yet returning, and patted my hand.

"Thank you, Kaworu." At my confused look she continued, "For being Asuka's friend. We were all so worried when she went to Japan – to fight Angels – and everything we heard didn't make it any better, but knowing she has dear friends to support her helps to ease our minds."

She sighed. "Asuka's always put on a brave front, trying to be Little Miss Perfect, like she can never just relax and be the child she deserves to be. We tried to treat her just as family, but I'm sure she's never really felt at home here – more like she's a guest who always has to be on her best behaviour." A soft smile appeared. "But yesterday she didn't ask whether she could bring you to stay over – just announced on the phone that she was going to – and it was the first time I've thought she actually felt comfortable here, enough to assume rather than request. I don't know whether that makes sense…"

I nodded earnestly, and patted her hand as she had mine.

Ms Langley smiled again. "So thank you, for helping Asuka … be herself."

Asuka rejoined us then, announcing "Okay, all good!" as she pocketed a slim digital camera, then looked suspiciously between her stepmother and me. "What were you two talking about?"

"I was just saying what good friends you two are," said Ms Langley, then raised her eyebrows hopefully. "Any chance of something more blooming? It's been ages since you've been on a date…"

Asuka burst into scornful laughter, taking her aback. "Dear God no! If you could hear him talk you wouldn't say that – not to mention I'm not his type."

"No?" Ms Langley looked inquiringly at me, and I considered how to signal 'boy' without being obscene.

"No, he's got my sloppy seconds," said Asuka, and her stepmother spluttered in shock – I inferred the unknown idiom to be indecent, and reflected that despite my own effort the conversation had degenerated anyway.

Asuka caught my uncomprehending look, and explained, "You're dating my ex. Well, sort-of ex. Even if nothing really ended up happening with me and Shinji-baka, I still kissed him first." Her smug expression faded when I showed no surprise at this. "You knew about that, huh? Well, were you jealous?"

I shook my head.

"Really? That's no fun," she pouted.

Ms Langley chuckled. "It's very sweet that you two are able to still be friends in this situation – lots of people, even adults, wouldn't have as much maturity."

Asuka tossed her hair. "Of course – I'm the most mature of all the pilots, and Kaworu is following my stellar example." She clapped my shoulder. "As he's about to follow me to the train station. Enough dilly-dallying!"

She whirled and flounced out the door, hair flying, and I shared an exasperated look with Ms Langley – it had been Asuka causing the delay, after all – and trailed behind her.

"Have fun!" Ms Langley called after us. "Be safe – call me if you'd like a lift home!"

"Yes, Mother!" Asuka chirped, and as I caught up with her looped her arm through mine.

"First things first, we're getting you some threads. We had a good start in Tokyo-3, but unfortunately Misato isn't here to help with the rest of the makeover. So I'll just have to be even more stylish in her absence."

Her steps faltered. "Did you hear what they've done with her?"

I took out my phone and opened the text Kaji had sent that morning.

Misato held in NERV detention block. Trial date to be set. Lenient sentence likely in consideration of service record. Dr A and Grmn staff supporting M.

"Good," was Asuka's verdict. "They better go easy on her – it was a dumb move, but at least her heart's in the right place. And it ended up helping to get rid of an enemy Eva."

The text continued: Mscw NERV under supervision by national govt – senior staff stood down – ops not halted. Pressure by other NERV branches and Grmn govt for arrests, full shutdown – Russ state dept resisting. Poss Eva deployment to enforce once repairs on U6 progressed.

Asuka huffed. "If they do send me it'd serve those damn Russians right. You tried, you failed, deal with the consequences." She showed no perturbance at the thought of piloting an Evangelion directly against human opponents, for which I could not blame her.

She peered at my phone again. "What else does Kaji say?"

Hey kids (the professional tone abruptly ceased) hope you're both feeling better, eat lots of chocolate while you're there :)

"Hah. Well if Mr Kaji says so…"

Once the quest for clothes was concluded (with appropriate documentation for Misato's feedback), enough time had elapsed since our extravagant breakfast to follow Kaji's instruction, and I learned that fondue could be committed with melted chocolate instead of cheese, and a variety of fruit instead of bread. I truly had returned to a bountiful world.

Asuka asked the waiter to take a photo of us to send back to our friends in Japan, and in answer to the man's enquiry claimed that I was her long-distance boyfriend on a rare and treasured visit.

The reason for this deception (a surprising one, when Asuka generally interpreted the possibility of our romantic connection to be an insult to her) was given when the waiter then brought out a platter of sweet pastries and baked goods to accompany our chocolate, and said they were a gift from the café, "to celebrate your romantic reunion."

Asuka somehow made herself blush at will. "Oh, you shouldn't have! That's sooooo sweet!" She grabbed my hand and squeezed – hard – and I heeded the demand for compliance.

Not that I would have been likely to disrupt her scheme anyway – free dessert was free dessert, after all, and it was apparent that Asuka and I had similar taste in multiple areas.

After the waiter left, she looked down at our joined hands a moment, her expression switching from affected affection to pensiveness.

"My … stepfather would've been happy if I told him I had a boyfriend."

It was the first time she had mentioned him since my arrival to her home.

"He was always encouraging me to go on dates, and asking me if I liked anyone. It was so embarrassing, really – talking about that kind of stuff with your parents, ugh. And it's not like he ever bugged Nina like that, even before she came out – it was just me – and I never felt comfortable telling him anything."

She huffed an awkward laugh. "I never even told him or Mother about Shinji, until just now. I guess, with you there, it felt silly not to tell the truth."

I turned my hand over to gather hers between thumb and fingers, trying to convey how happy I was for her that she felt freer than she had.

"It's not like I'm not sad over Father dying," she blurted suddenly, and her grip tightened. "I am. It's just … He abandoned Mama. Even more than with Mother, and Nina, I could never really forget that. He should've been my real dad, but he left her, like a brat who couldn't have exactly what he wanted. I tried to be respectful, and I know you're not supposed to speak ill of the dead, but … I … I'm not really surprised that he made that choice." Her voice dropped. "He always was a coward."

She sniffed and wiped her eyes. "And I'm a terrible daughter."

Heedless of the possibility of violent retribution, I rounded the table and slid into the booth next to her, and put my arm around her shoulders. She shook her head, but leaned into me apparently despite herself.

Several deep breaths later, she took a draught of water, then scrubbed her face with both hands, before elbowing me until I released her (and then once more, for good measure).

I caught her attention, and pointed at her chest.

"Yes, I know my figure is amazing," she snorted, "stop being a pervy cheater."

I rolled my eyes, and pointed again insistently.

"Me?"

I nodded, and made a heart shape with my hands.

"Love? No? Oh – heart. My heart. Okay, what about my heart?"

I gestured at our table, covered with a chaotic variety of different foods.

"It's delicious? You weirdo," she laughed, and I grinned in contagion to her mirth even as I shook my head.

Again I gestured, pointing at each little bowl or tray or cup, trying to emphasise how many there were and how untidy it made the table.

Asuka tried again, indulging my struggle with a kindness she would generally refuse to acknowledge (and which most of my Tokyo-3 friends would scarce have believed possible for her).

"My heart … has lots of stuff in it? Is full of different things? Is messy? …Complicated?"

I clapped my hands.

"Right! Well, that's true – goes with being a mature and intelligent individual, of course – not that you'd know what that's like."

Ignoring her barb, I drew a line in the air circling her, then made a thumbs-up sign.

"I'm good?"

Nod, nod.

"So – my heart is complicated, but I'm still good."

Nod-nod-nod.

She rolled her eyes, but happiness shone from her. "Sophisticated therapy there, Wonderboy." She speared a halved strawberry and dipped it in the pot of melted chocolate.

I did the same, and for several minutes there was silence as we both concentrated on our dessert.

As we were finishing, Asuka pushed over to me a dish holding a skinned banana swathed in whipped cream. "Here, you can practice on this for when you see Shinji again."

I cast her a puzzled look, and she cracked up laughing.

"Ah, still dumb and pretty. Never change, Kaworu." She dabbed at her mouth with a serviette, and avoided my eyes as she muttered, "And … thanks for earlier. It wasn't terrible therapy, for a mute."

I took her hand in my own and pressed a kiss to the knuckles.

She scoffed, "Ridiculous," but didn't pull away. Whatever she might claim to the contrary, Asuka was as soft-hearted – in her own way – as anyone I knew, and I treasured her real smiles all the more for their rarity.

Unlike my first visit to Tokyo-3 NERV, I did not become lost soon after entry to the Berlin base; however, I was promptly separated from Asuka as I had been from Shinji, although in this instance it was deliberate.

"Captain Soryu, what a pleasant surprise! We weren't expecting to see you until tomorrow at the earliest."

"Hello Kommandant," said Asuka wearily.

Kommandant Heisenberg was a tall woman with long silver braids and a smile that seemed more than halfway to turning into a knowing smirk. She ruffled Asuka's hair as she reached us, at odds with her respectful address, and making her pilot scowl.

"And you must be the Fifth Child, Kaworu Nagisa," she said to me.

I bowed automatically, but she extended her hand and I quickly shook it instead – Japanese habits had apparently stuck firmly. Humans have invented so many ways to say the same thing…

"Thank you for your efforts in the battle with Unit 10," said the commandant. "Everyone appreciates that the Tokyo-3 team came all the way here and supported us."

Asuka snorted. "They came here to collect Misato after she went rogue."

"—While trying to defend you." Heisenberg patted her on the shoulder. "But no need to quibble. Our Japanese colleagues are most welcome here, of course." I bowed again.

"I'm just showing Kaworu the tourist traps," said Asuka; "inflict some of that terrible lounge cocoa on him."

Heisenberg chuckled. "A very important part of the Berlin experience. But since you're here, why don't we have a quick checkup with Doctor Gäng, just to see where we're at?"

"Ugh, I'm fine…"

"Can't hurt to be attentive! I'm sure Kaworu will forgive a slight detour." She sent me an ingratiating smile.

"Well, he's not likely to complain," Asuka snorted, and allowed the commandant to guide her along the corridor with a hand on each shoulder.

We traversed an escalator, several turns, and multiple security checkpoints later before reaching a door bearing a poster with the injunction 'KEEP CALM and READ CLARKE'. After a knock and response, Asuka was sent in, but Heisenberg gestured for me to remain outside with her.

She and I walked together a little further along to a mezzanine – or rather, a large room that had been broken open at one end by Unit 10's assault, and now overlooked the base's central shaft. Heisenberg walked up to the safety cordon and surveyed her damaged domain with unexpected serenity.

"So nice to finally meet you, Kaworu Nagisa," she said, whirling back to face me. "You were Hamburg's little secret for so long…"

A chill ran down my spine.

"…that I had to ask where the data came from for Unit 06's dummy plug." She chuckled. "Ask in the sense of 'invoke Directorial authority', of course."

She cast a wryly appraising glance over me, and I felt my skin crawl.

"I suppose I see why they kept you in reserve – couldn't let our Chairman's byblow steal the glory from Doktor Soryu's investment, eh?"

'Investment' is a strange word for a daughter, I thought, before my mind properly caught up with my ears. Wait – 'byblow'? Does she think that I am Keel's bastard child? I couldn't help myself, and shook with voiceless laughter.

Heisenberg reached out and twisted a few strands of my hair between her fingers, and my laughter died immediately. "You don't look much like him," she mused; "I suppose genetic manipulation will do that. If the goal was to craft the universal pilot, preserving familial resemblance would hardly have been prioritised. Or perhaps – a maternal resemblance, hm? I never caught that part of the gossip, so I wouldn't be able to judge."

Even had aphasia not stricken me, I could not have imagined how to respond.

After a long pause, she added incongruously, "I'm sorry for your loss."

I bowed my head in acknowledgement, at the same time freeing my hair from her grip.

She withdrew her hand only slowly. "I hope I haven't offended you."

I shook my head.

"No comment, though?"

With a deliberately theatrical wince, I tapped my throat.

"Oh! That was where – my, you poor thing." Her sympathetic expression, I thought, was not entirely feigned. "To think that such a weapon would be used against a human pilot – horrifying. Not what Tokyo was expecting when they sent Unit 09, hm?"

She cast a glance back towards the clinic, and Asuka. "The high cost of loyalty…"

I lifted my chin stubbornly, trying to put all my determination and resolve into my expression. I regret nothing.

Heisenberg quirked a smile. "You aren't cowed, though, are you? Very impressive. I can see why you and Asuka get along."

She faced again the broken-open wall and cavernous space beyond, hands linked behind her back. "Our Captain Soryu is admired by all. Even after everything she's been through, in Japan and now here, she's been working indefatigably since she returned – I know Unit 06 isn't where her heart truly lies, but you can't fault her dedication. Truly, a paragon of human willpower. It would take something … exceptional to subjugate that."

Her praise of my friend went some way toward easing the discomfort of her bizarre scandalising on the topic of my vessel's parentage.

"Well, now that Moscow have been put in their place and the Lance is in safe hands, she won't have to face anything like that again. And we'll soon have Unit 06 patched up all ready for her, you can trust my word on that." That knowing smirk finally bloomed on her face, before being banished by innocuous blandness.

A door slammed nearby, and Asuka's exasperated voice announced her release from medical meddling. She looked each way along the corridor before spotting us, and Heisenberg waved her over.

"All ship-shape and rain-right?" she smiled at her pilot, and Asuka rolled her eyes.

"Yes, Kommandant, everything's fine. Stop talking Kaworu's ear off, we've got a whole tour to get through."

Heisenberg chuckled. "My apologies for delaying you both." To me she said, "It was an honour to meet you, Fifth Child. Take care," with a casual wave, and turned to walk away.

Asuka huffed out a sigh. "Well, now that's over with…" She saw my frown after her commanding officer. "What's up, Wonderboy?"

I shook my head, and managed to conjure a smile as I held out my crooked elbow for her.

She looped hers through it. "All right then, let's keep going."

"Yes." My voice was yet a whisper, but Asuka heard it, and her face lit up and she squeezed my arm.

"That's the spirit! Nothing's going to keep us down!"

Yes, I thought again, as we set off together. Let's keep going, for as long as we can.