Disclaimer-Not Mine. Don't Own It.

It's Lily's thirteenth birthday. She glances around at the presents on the table and the clock all at once. He's going to be here this year, he promised. He said he was on his way and would be there soon. All she had to do now was sit and wait for him to show up.

"Lily, come and blow out your candles! We're going to sing Happy Birthday," Hermione said from the kitchen.

"Can we wait until he gets here, auntie?" she asked, almost pleading. There's a slight hesitation from the kitchen and Lily knows that Hermione doubts Harry.

"Sure, darling, we'll wait until he gets here."

Lily is nervous. He isn't here yet and the day is almost over. He said eight hours ago that he would show up and be here…he promised her.

"Lily!" Nathan called from the living room. "There's a muggle phone call for you."

"Really?" she asked, poking her head into the room. Her cousin nodded and handed her the phone while she took it cautiously. "Hello?" There's crinkling on the line. "H-hello?"

"Lily?"

Harry. "Yes?"

"Listen, something-"

"Came up?" Lily suggested for him. There's a pause.

"Yeah, listen, I'm really-"

"Sorry?" Lily cut in. "Me too."

"Lily?" She's silent. "Lily?"

"What?"

"I sent a gift with Hedwig, she should be there soon." There's a voice in the background and Lily feels her hand clench around the phone in anger.

"Well, I suppose that makes up for you not being here?"

"Lily, I'm busy, something has arisen-"

"Let me guess what it was! You have someone there and can't take time out of your busy schedule of sitting on your ass to come over and celebrate your daughter's birthday! That is what has come up. That is why you can't come here. You don't want to. You found something else to do. I'm not on the top of your priority list. Fine. I get it. Have fun and I hope you don't get an STD."

The silence that follows her hand slamming down the receiver is deafening. She tries with all her might to stop the sob from coming, to stop the flow of tears before they get there.

He isn't coming, she told herself miserably, he bailed. Again.

Suddenly a voice floats into her mind.

Did you really think he was coming anyways? When has he EVER shown up when he said he would? Been there when he said he would. This is just typical Harry.

Still, the embarrassment hurts more then anything. She told everyone he was coming and he did it again. He back out on their plans, he stomped her hopes and ruined her birthday. How could she have been so foolish as to think he would have actually come? How could she have believed him?

It takes all her self-control, all her years of practice to turn around and walk back into the kitchen with a smile on her face. Her aunt looks up curiously; her uncle is washing the dishes.

"Let's cut the cake," she says, a traitorous wobble in her voice as her smile manages to stay intact. Hermione looks up, anger and pity filling her eyes at once.

"Alright, Ron go get Wyatt and Nathan."

"Alright," Ron walks over to the doorway and calls for them.

They enter moments later, the promise of cake drawing them from their other activities. The song begins and she stares into the flames, watching them flickers in the darkness. Then, just as though she's sucking in the breath she needs, she blows out of the candles, wishing the flames were Harry.

The cake is cut, the presents are open and there's a tap and the window. Lily looks around and sees a white owl sitting on the window box, looking beseechingly in at them, telling them to open up and let her in.

"Whose owl is that?" Nathan asks, gesturing to Hedwig.

"Harry's," Lily replies dryly, walking over and opening the window for the owl. She takes the package into her hands, feeling its weight weigh her down slightly. "If you don't mind, I'm a little partied out-"

"Of course, you go up and rest," Hermione says instantly.

"Yeah, me too," Wyatt says, faking a yawn.

"No, you can help finish the dishes."

Once in her room Lily can finally cry. She finally lets out a silent sob and tosses the package onto the bed angrily, wishing she had the strength to stomp it out of her life. She yanks the clips she specially put into her hair our and tosses them away. She yanks off Ginny's necklace, tossing it onto her vanity.

Her body is pulsing angrily, screaming pain. She ignores it and opens the present from Harry, wondering what could make up for his absence. She stares at the art set she desperately wanted but knew was too much money. He had bought it for her, probably this morning. He probably didn't even put any thought into it, or most likely just searched her mind when she wasn't noticing.

As she always did, she strode over to the loose floorboard under the rug and stuffed the present down there, next to all the others she wouldn't use. She was almost back at her desk before she spun around and gathered all the things up to look at them.

Books she wanted, clothes she desired, anything she had ever wanted he had gotten her. Who knows how many galleons spent? And all he ever had to do was show up.

The dinner that night was awkward for many reasons. Lily refused to speak to anyone, still angry at her father; half wishing he would leave tonight.

"So, Harry, how's work?" Hermione asked coldly. She was furious that he had upset Lily, again.

"Fine," Harry replied smoothly, glaring over at her.

Lily swished her food around on her plate and heard her uncle Ron speak to Nathan, then to Wyatt and soon the rest of the Weasley's were talking to each other, leaving anyone with green eyes out of the conversation.

After dinner she helped her aunt Hermione clean up the mess. There was silence for a moment, Lily wasn't sure why. She had always been able to talk to her aunt as though she were her very own mother.

"I thought of something today and Harry agreed with me," Hermione ventured softly. Lily wondered what it could possibly be. "Maybe you could spend tomorrow at his house and then come back for Christmas Eve dinner."

"Tomorrow? Alone with him?" Lily asked dumbly, stopping all pretenses of actually working. "You really think that's a good idea?"

"You two need to get along," Hermione said, rounding on Lily and staring her straight in the eye. "Was it that makes it so hard for you to get along?"

"Hermione," Lily didn't bother with aunt, "sometimes I literally sit around all day wondering why we can't make it work and it hits me every time I see him. He doesn't want it to work. He's him and I'm me and nothing anyone does will ever change that. I really wonder what I ever did to make him so indifferent towards me and I just realize that he's miserable with everyone and until he cheers up or gets over whatever is keeping him down, he'll always be like that."

Silence.

"I thought maybe you could leave with him first thing in the morning," Hermione said, trying to hide that she was crying.

"Fine." Lily's places down the sponge and walked from the room, her hands shaking. She passes her father sitting in the den, reading a book that she's read dozens of times. He seems so at peace, so normal that only she knows what will happen when he looks up. His face will clear of any emotion and his eyes will cloud and it won't be Harry Potter anymore. It'll be her father who's staring back at her.

Before he can, she runs up to her room and flops down on the bed, wondering if she'll cry about what happened earlier. It doesn't happen; tears don't flow from her eyes. She's in luck tonight.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

The next morning she was woken early by her aunt who was trying to make sure she was ready for her long, long day. The sun was already up, shining brightly into her eyes and she wondered how she could have slept so late.

"Your dad is downstairs, waiting," Hermione said, kissing her forehead. "I love you My Lily."

Lily got up and wondered what she should wear today. Would he be introducing her to any of his colleagues? The thought makes her laugh for a moment. Ha! Harry Potter telling someone that he had a daughter? Where does she come up with this stuff?

Finally, she chooses to be casual with jeans and a sweater. It's warm enough outside so that's all she'll need, but she takes her cloak just in case.
"Lily?" It's her aunt warning her Harry is getting testy.

Good, Lily thinks smugly, let him wait. I've been waiting my whole damn life.

However, she quickly gets down the stairs, her red hair swinging in braids around her face. Her father is standing there in front of her, looking as he always did. Cold and indifferent towards everyone. That is, except Ron and Hermione. He seemed to have a soft spot towards them.

"Ready?"

"Yes."

That would be their entire conversation on the ride to his home. He seemed to be quite averse to traveling with floo with her. It all came back to the time he lost her and she wound up in America because he gave her the wrong word. He even had the nerve to be angry with her, the one lost in another country at the age of eight.

They pulled up to his "mansion" and he punched in four numbers as the gates opened. There were four cars sitting in the driveway, one Lily didn't recognize.

"Did you get a new car?" she asked politely. Harry didn't answer and she turned to him, shocked to see his cheeks turning red. "It's pretty…shiny."

"Er, yes, well." Harry cleared his throat and stopped the car. Lily opened the door and waited for him to go further. He opened the grand doors and turned back to her, something close to excitement filling his eyes. "I want you to meet someone. Petra! Can you come down here?"

Lily was silent, looking at her father when she heard the clickity-click of heels coming down the tiled floor. A shriek of delight suddenly sounded off in the foyer, bouncing off the white walls and echoing.

"Harry! You didn't tell me you were bringing her here now! I would have done my hair." Lily glanced up, watching a woman with sleek black hair come down the stairs, a bright smile on the perfect, china doll face. Her blue eyes sparkled happily as she took in Lily with one swift glance. She took a deep breath and another smile lit up her face. "Hello, Lily. I'm Petra."

Complete and utter silence.

Petra glanced back at Harry almost worriedly, only to see him staring at Lily with a mixture of annoyance and anxiety. Lily is simply staring at the woman. Finally, she turns to Harry and desperately tries to keep her voice calm.

"This is why you took me here?" she asked, her voice remaining calm despite the earthquake shattering her nervous system.

"Yes, well, I thought you'd better meet sooner or later…what with what's happening," Harry said and suddenly looked scared. "Why don't we go sit down in the living room, eh?"

Lily found herself being led by Petra, much to her discomfort. She then found herself being squashed next to this same woman and across from Harry.

"Now, Lily, don't you worry about a thing. I am not trying to replace your mum. No worries there," Petra said breathlessly. "I want us to be close buddies."

Not trying to replace your mother…What with what's happening…

It hit Lily with a sudden bang and she felt her hands begin to shake again. Not with fear but with anger and embarrassment. She glanced up at her father's face and saw, for the first time in his entire life that he was smiling at Petra. He was finally smiling a wonderful smile. A smile that made him look ten years younger.

This woman would be her stepmother…her stepmother! She didn't look old enough to be her sister, for Merlin's sake. Lily looked her over again and felt another startling tingle as she saw the expanding bump rising from her stomach. She was pregnant. Her dad was going to be a dad with someone else.

"So, Lily, are you alright?" It was Harry's voice ripping her from the thoughts flashing in her mind. She glanced up at him, desperately wishing she had stayed in bed. Everything was happening too fast for her. Her father was getting married and it was to this woman who Lily had never met.

What did she care, though? She didn't know her father and had no claim over him. What did it matter if he married Petra? Why should she care?

Because it's admitting that she's really gone, a voice whispered to her. It's admitting that Ginny is really gone and she's never coming back. It's admitting that Harry has finally decided to be a family with this woman, not Ginny, not you. It's admitting that he chose her. You don't mean enough to him.

"I…" Her voice was failing her. "I…"

"Yes?" Petra prompted.

"I need to pee, excuse me," she whispered and rushed from the room. She managed to get into the bathroom before the vomit that rippled throughout her finally erupted, landing in the basin of the toilet.

I hate him! Her mind screamed angrily. I hate him, I hate him, I hate him! Why does he hate me so much? Why does he want to see me suffer? Why? Why? Why?

"Lily?" There's a knock on the door and she can't quite seem to answer whoever it might be. "Lily, its dad." She stared at the door in absolute shock. 'Dad?' He's calling himself 'dad' now?

She found her voice, actually she found her scream.

"Dad?" she asked, opening the door?" Since when has it been dad? In all my life I don't remember you ever asking me to call you dad."

"Oh, come on! You've called me dad," Harry snapped, looking uncomfortable.

"No, I think when I was seven you asked me to call you Harry," she replied dryly. "Suddenly you want a relationship? Now of all times? Why? Why now?"

"I just-" He stopped. "I want to fix this thing between us. Tell me."

"Too late," she snarled. "You are too damn late. If you wanted to fix this thing between us you could have come back for me. If you want to fix this then grab yourself a time turner, go back in time and when you see yourself, tell him that I need my father! Tell him that all I ever wanted from you was your love and you couldn't even give me that! You cannot fix this, Harry. You have wasted too much time and we have just grown further and further apart and now we're strangers. You are miserable

"You pushed me out, you pushed aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron out, you pushed the Weasley's out and you pushed her out, and that, Harry Potter, is why you can not fix this. You weren't there for me when I needed you, when I wanted you. After she died you left me! You have never shown any love for me, any recognition that you're my father. You're constantly letting me down, never showing up when you say you're going to."

"Lily-"

"No, I don't want to hear it! I don't want to hear it!"

"Come on now," he said earnestly, looking back towards the den where Petra was sure to be sitting. He didn't want her to hear them.

"What did I ever do to you?" Lily whispered, making him turn and look at her. "What did I ever do to you to make you so cold towards me? Why do you hate me so much? WHAT DID I DO? JUST TELL ME SO I CAN FIX IT! Why do you hate me?" There was silence. He didn't seem to be able to speak and for the first time in her entire life, Lily saw tears in her father's eyes.

"I-"

"You keep pushing me out of your life; you keep me at arms length and never let me get close to you. Why? What is it about me that makes you so damn sad? Why was I never enough for you? Why? Just tell me so I know, please."

"Don't you understand?" His voice was suddenly ringing through the halls. "You-you are your mother's child, Lily. I look at you and all I see is her! And it hurts, alright? This right now hurts me! She wasn't supposed to leave me like this! It was agreed! I would go out and fight and die. She was supposed to wait for ME. She's gone and I can't get over it with a constant reminder of her staring at me! I couldn't bear to hold you and know that she was gone."

There was a shocked silence.

"That," Lily whispered, "has to be the DUMBEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD!" He stared at her, shocked. "You need to grow up and realize that no one lives in Harry Potter world. Lately, the world has NOT REVOLVED AROUND YOU AND YOU'RE FEELINGS! You think it hurts to know she's gone? Try being her daughter!

"I sit by her bed every week wishing with all my might that she would either die or wake up because this medium isn't helping. My father abandoned me without a single thought and he constantly comes into my life and leaves without much thought AT ALL. I hate you, do you understand that? Either be my god damn father or just get out because I am sick and tired of picking up after your mess. I am sick of feeling like crap every day of my life!

"My mother is gone, my father is an asshole, and I am probably, very slowly going insane. So, for once in your life, step into my shoes and look around. All I ever wanted was a family. A real family with my parents who look like me and a dog or a cat. Instead, I've got my aunt and uncle and cousins who look NOTHING like me. They all have brown hair and blue eyes and what do I have? Dark red hair and green eyes. I don't even look like them!

"I've waited my entire life for you to-" she broke off, gasping for air in between her sobs, "GROW UP! And now you are. You're finally growing up and you're ready to get married and it's with HER! You are finally ready and it's with someone else. You're growing up and it isn't with me, it's with her and your new baby."

"Lily, please, just-"

"No, I don't want to talk to you! I don't want anything to do with you! Go and be someone else's dad!" She spun on her heel and went to the fireplace, shaking with anger. Her hand hit the pail and grasped onto some floo. "St. Mungo's!"

The whirling sensation prickled through her, her elbows banged into the walls. Finally, she came to a stop and familiar sounds met her waiting ears.

"Miss Weasley, what a pleasant surprise! We weren't expecting you for another week or so! Come on, I'll bring you to her room. She's doing well today, just in case you were wondering. Maybe making some progress."

"Elsa you've been telling me that for as long as I can remember. I know she's gone," Lily said, stepping into the room and seeing her mother's hair already. "I'll be fine now."

Elsa left and Lily slowly walked over to her mother, feeling nervous for the first time. Her mother's face was pale and gorgeous as always. She was the most beautiful woman Lily had ever seen in her entire life.

"Hey, mum," Lily whispered, sliding a chair over and sitting closer to her mother then she ever had. For the first time, Lily grasped down and reached for her mother's pale hand. It felt cold and almost like porcelain. "I know that we don't really talk much, but that's to be expected. You're not much of a talker." Lily let out a small laugh and then sobered up as she saw her mother's unmoving lips. "I went to see Harry today and it was the first time in three years that I've been to his house. He has a new girlfriend and she's pregnant with his child-" Lily burst into tears, her head resting down onto the bedspread. She sobbed freely now, knowing her mother would never tell. After a moment she was able to look up and glance at her mother again. "God, mum, why are you doing this to me? He's supposed to be with you! You weren't supposed to be here. You're too good for this bed. Just snap out of it, will you?" Nothing. "What do I have to do to wake you up, eh? Just-GOD! Tell me what I need to do to get you to snap out of it!" Still nothing. "Alright, fine! We'll just talk then."

Lily thought for a moment…what to talk about to her coma'd mother. Instead of talking, they sat in silence for hours, way until it got dark. Lily was feeling her eyes droop and realized with a start that she should have been home now. They would have been looking for her. She glanced down at her mother, wondering whether or not she should even talk to her anymore. Ginny was sleeping and always would be. She was on death's door.

"I have to go, mum," Lily said softly, kissing her mother's cheek. "I love you." She stopped and waited for a reaction. Almost impulsively she bent down. "I forgive you."

She left quickly, wondering when her mother would come out of her coma.

What Lily, or anyone knew, was that Ginny could hear and feel everything that was going on around her. She felt every touch. She heard every voice. She would be dead if they didn't feed her through a tube. She would be dead if Hermione and Ron hadn't fought so hard to keep her alive.

I love you too, Lily, Ginny though desperately. Please, get me out of this!

A/N Please read and review.