Note: Flashbacks are in Italic
CH 13
"Can anyone tell me how this ever started?"
Toby says as he looks at the two girls with bruises on their faces and looking angrily at each other. And, if you're wondering what is going on here just like Toby, well, let's rewind a little bit on what happened before Toby and his partner were called to deal with a 'domestic disturbance' in the middle of the night.
"What is wrong, Emy?"
Wayne says as he is able to read his daughter so well, she's an open book in terms of emotions and it's very obvious something is causing distress to the dear Emily.
"I… I…"
Emily sits beside his hospital bed. Still struggling to say what she came to say. How is she supposed to say she screwed it up? How is she supposed to say she's not the perfect girl he raised? Having his approval, making him proud, it has always been the only thing that Emily wanted in life till love appeared in front of her.
She always heard people saying how love makes you act like a fool. She never believed in it till now. Because she feels like a fool for how easily she indulged in Love. A love in the shape of two beautiful blue eyes, a beautiful smile and golden curls. And, Emily's lips curve into a tiny smile, just imagining how beautiful it would be if the baby gets the same features of the blonde.
"I hope the baby gets her eyes"
"Huh? What baby? What are you talking about, Emily?!"
The panic in Emily's eyes rises when she realizes what she mumbled out. And now that the 'b' word has been spoken, there's no way to chicken out. There's just one thing to do, to come clean and tell the truth. Wayne says nothing, he just nods, still processing everything Emily is saying. And, the brunette is already sobbing, feeling sad about how she might lose her father's love, about how he might feel ashamed of her. So much fear, Emily was expecting the worst, when this went in a completely different direction than what she expected.
"I'm gonna be a grandpa? I'm gonna be a grandpa!"
"Huh? Dad?!"
Wayne is in tears when he strongly pulls Emily into a hug. But, those tears are not sad tears, they are happy tears, because, yes, this wasn't planned. Yes, Emily had to be more careful and responsible. But even if he could scold her about all the things she did wrong, right now all she needs is to feel supported and loved. And, that's how he makes Emily feel.
She feels safe in her father's arms and more than that, she feels relieved to see that he's still proud of her. Because the love of her father is more than enough, but, it's not the only love she craves for and Wayne can see it in her eyes, in the way she speaks about this 'Alison' he has never met. The brunette is in love, and that's why he says...
"It's never too late to fight for love, Emily"
"She hates me…"
A tear rolls over her eye as she sadly says how Alison might feel about her. Yes, the blonde will take responsibility, but, the angst, the anger is so palpable in her eyes that it makes Emily very sad to think she might never be able to change the way the blonde looks at her now. But, despite all the discouragement she might feel, her father is there to try to give her hope.
"There's just one step between hate and love"
"Dad…"
"Emy. Listen to me. I always put my work and my career in the Police force first. That's why your mother left me. And, I should have ran after her, but, I didn't because I thought my career and my obligations as a cop where more important than anything else"
"She left me too, Dad"
"I know and I blame me for that too…"
"Dad, don't! You…"
"I was wrong, Emy. I should have chosen love and my family as a priority. And now that you are going to be a mom. I really hope you choose better than me, so you do not make the same mistake than me"
Her father's words stay with her all day long. He's right on so many things. Mostly on the fact that now, she needs to reassess her priorities. Because what is more important? Being the perfect cop or being there for the baby? Can she get both? Can she manage being a single mom and becoming the perfect cop at the same time?
Emily deeply sighs as she wonders about the near future. She's on patrol duty tonight with her partner and best friend Toby, it's a calm night, perfect to reflect on so many things. Maybe that's why she's not the only girl in the city doing the same. Because in a few blocks from where Emily is patrolling, another girl is also reflecting on the near future.
"Wow, you're gonna be a mom, Alison?!"
"Yeah…"
Alone, in Kara's apartment. Alison and the other blonde finally are able to put down their masks and expose their broken souls. The game night with all the friends of Kara was fun, but what these two girls need right now is to vent about what is happening in their minds and their hearts. Opening up to a complete stranger was easier than what Alison ever thought. Maybe, it's because Kara is the kind of person who inspires trust.
"I'm so sorry, Alison. I feel so dumb now, for trying to hook you up with my sister"
Alison chuckles, she's flattered because for what she knows, Dr Alex Danvers is a really nice person, but if she must be honest, she's not ready to move on. Despite how badly Emily hurt her, the brunette still holds a big part of her heart. And, Kara knows that feeling too well.
"I want to believe Lena's feelings were true, too. You know?"
"Yeah. I know…"
They look at each other and sadly chuckle as they cannot believe how much they have in common. They were conned, they believed in the love of two brunettes without a heart and now, now they have no clue what is supposed to be their next chapter. For Alison, it is more complicated since there's a baby on the way. And, Kara expresses her relief by always using a condom, but…
"You know that condoms are not 100% effective, right?"
"What?! No way!"
"I'm not lying, Kara, it's indicated in the box…"
"Non! It's not!"
Kara jumps out of the couch and rushes to her bathroom to verify with her own eyes what Alison is saying. And, it seems that Kara is finally reading the little letters on the box of condoms when the blonde starts to curse very loudly. The cute reporter is very bad at saying big words, cursing is more Alex's skill and Alison tries to not laugh as she hears the lame cursing of Kara from afar.
Someone knocks at the door, Kara was still in the bathroom and Alison saw no harm in opening the door. Maybe it was one of Kara's friends who forgot something, that's what Alison is thinking when she opens the door. But, that thought vanishes when she stands in front of a very confused Lena Luthor.
"Ms Luthor?"
Of course, Alison knows who Lena Luthor is, and Lena also knows who's the blonde. The inner circle of power women is very tiny, so Lena knows that the blonde in front of her, it's not other than Alison DiLaurentis, the CEO of -A Toys. And, for a second, the dear Luthor wonders if she got in the wrong apartment, but those doubts fade away the moment Kara emerges behind Alison, holding a box of condoms.
" You're right, Ali. Condoms are not 100% effective. They should point it out with bigger letters! I… uhm… Lena? What are you doing here?"
The dear Luthor had prepared a big speech in her mind, she rehearsed it as she was in the elevator, but such perfect speech is being clouded by the implications of why Kara has a box of condoms between her hands. There must be a very reasonable explanation, but the only thing that Lena can think right now, it's that she interrupted something between the two blondes and, maybe that's why she launched a lethal gaze towards the blonde who opened her door.
"Why are you looking at me like that? Wh-...?"
Alison's questions die out when Lena punches in the face. Once again, jealousy gets the best of Lena and Alison might not be a trained fighter as Kate Wayne was, but she's not going to go down without fighting back.
"Lena! Ali! Nooo!"
The struggle went out of proportions and that's the main reason Kara's neighbors called the cops. And, fate has a really weird way to mess up with our lives, because the first responders to the call, were no others than Toby and Emily.
"Can anyone tell me how this ever started?"
Toby says as he looks at the two girls with bruises on their faces and looking angrily at each other. And now, you know how this fight started with a misunderstanding but, Emily doesn't know that. She wonders what happened, but mostly, she wonders what the hell Alison is doing in the apartment of another girl at this hour.
"Why were you fighting, Ali?"
Emily directly addresses her question to the blonde CEO and Alison's anger calms down when she sees the way Emily looks at her. She feels this big urge to hug her and make her understand this is not what it looks like, but she says nothing as her mind convinces her that she owes no explanation to the brunette.
Kara would like to explain to the cops what happened, but to be honest, she has no clue why Lena started the fight. She might be oblivious about what caused the fight, but she's conscious that her Ex is looking more sad than angry.
"You started the fight, Ms. Luthor?"
Lena says nothing, she just sobs and not because her face hurts, but because her heart hurts more when she realizes that Kara might have moved on, already. Yeah, nothing hurts more than realizing that you have lost the love of your life. And that's why, after that night, Lena does nothing more than mopping around her luxurious apartment, drunker than ever.
The raven-haired woman is in an auto-destructive mode, it's hard to watch and maybe that's why her friend Sam decides to do something about it.
"SIRI find everything about: Kara Danvers"
In a search to help her friend, Sam decides to approach Kara's sister, Dr Danvers. That's why she's in the hospital, hoping to get the chance to talk with Alex but all she gets, it's the chance to overhear a conversation between the two Danvers sisters.
"So, what brings you here, Kara. I'm happy to see you, but you never visit me at my workplace, so what is coming on?"
"Well… I wanted to ask you something as a doctor…"
"Oh, okay, what is it?"
"If one blonde has a baby with a brunette. The baby will be blonde or a mix of two?"
Since Alison shared with her the news about her baby with Emily. Kara was wondering what the baby would be like, it's a silly question, really, which goes disproportionately bad for her big sister who over reacts badly to it, misunderstanding the context of the question.
"OMG! You're pregnant!"
Kara gasps in shock, she feels all the eyes on them as Alex was very loud, that's why she drags Alex away from the public eyes, leaving an speechless Sam, who didn't waste time to run away as far as she can because if Kara is pregnant then, her bestie needs to know it very soon.
Misunderstandings. Something is said and you hear something else. It's so easy to misread a situation. It would be easier to undo the misunderstanding if we were able to ask without fear. But, sadly, speaking out is not so simple. Especially for another brunette who's also in the hospital, waiting for the doctor to come in.
"Emily, are you okay?"
Alison asks because today, during their medical appointment, the brunette looks very stressed, looking away as she's not able to look at the blonde in the eyes since the incident of the other night. Emily knows she has no rights to ask Alison what she was doing in Kara's apartment and why she got into a fight with Lena Luthor. And, maybe, that's why she strongly tries to avoid the elephant in the room. But, ignoring your emotions is not the solution, especially when Emily's attitude towards the blonde, it makes Alison think that she doesn't want her here.
"If you don't want me to be here, just say it, Emily…"
"Huh?"
"I should leave…"
The blonde doesn't like to feel unwelcome and distress is the last thing that Emily and the baby need, so, she's more than ready to give the brunette as much space as she needs, but before she could give a step back, Emily holds her hand, refusing to let her go anywhere.
"Emily?"
"Do not leave me for her!"
"Huh? What the hell are you talking about?"
The doctor arrives and starts to do the ultrasound. They don't say another word about it for now, but jealousy is present in the room. Emily wants to blame her pregnancy hormones for it, but, it's a lie. Because she's jealous about Kara & Alison. And, she's not the only one in town feeling deeply jealous about this duo. Otherwise, why would Lena be at home, in a workday, draining all her bottles of liquor.
"Great, I'm out of wine, and whiskey, and vodka, and…"
Restocking her home with alcohol was now Lena's priority, the problem was that she could barely walk, so it was a big relief for her to see Sam, walking into her home.
"SAM! My Sam… Sam, Sam, Sam…" (giggling) "Perfect timing! I need you to…"
"Tell you something, now!"
Lena frowns, she's tipsy, more than tipsy, she's very drunk, but not drunk enough to not understand what Sam says next.
"Kara is pregnant"
Sam walks from right to left as she explains what she heard and what she saw at the hospital. The two Danvers sisters, talking about babies and Alex, blowing out that Kara was pregnant. The CFO of L-Corp wasn't sure if she was the one who should give the news to Lena, but, how could she keep a secret of such magnitude? She had to say it to Lena and she really hopes she didn't choose wrong.
"Lena? Did you hear what I said…? I…"
"I heard you, loud and clear"
Sam smiles, she believes this will be the extra push Lena needed to get out of her depression, but jealousy is a strong poison, it can drive your mind in the wrong direction, so wrong that you start to question everything.
"Well, I'm happy for her…"
"What?! What the hell are you saying?!"
"I'm saying, who says that baby is mine?!"
"Lena, no, you…"
"I saw her with that DiLaurentis! In her apartment, with a box of condoms! It's very obvious Kara was going to screw her…" (little laughs) "Who knows, maybe she has been screwing her all this time while she was with me too…"
It's poison that comes from her mouth, it's pure jealousy and Sam should understand that Lena really doesn't mean that, but even then, she doesn't hesitate to slap Lena in the face. And, the dear Luthor wildly opens her eyes, feeling angry for what her best friend just did, but that anger vanishes when she sees the watery-eyes on the other brunette.
"Sam?"
"How dare you say those words?! How dare you doubt your parenty?!"
"Sam, I…"
"I know what you're thinking: "it's not mine", "anyone could be the father". Save your words, Luthor because I know the speech better than you! Ruby's father said the same when I told him I was expecting…"
Lena gulps hard, feeling like crap. She knows how Sam felt when her partner at the time dismissed his responsibility so easily. She always thought she was better than men like Ruby's father, but it looks like she was wrong.
"Sam, I'm sorry, I…"
"You better think very carefully about what you will do next, Lena, because I've no doubt that Kara will be more than capable of raising this child alone. Damn it! If I could do it, so can she! But, make no mistake, once you decide to stay away, it's forever. No birthdays, no holidays, nothing! You get nothing more than loneliness! And you've no idea what you're giving up..."
Sam says no more, she leaves as fast as she arrived, leaving behind a more desolated Luthor.
*** Lena's narrative (voice-over) ***
It's so easy to follow the wrong direction when we are too cowardly to see above our own fears and doubts. It's so easy to believe the world is against us and it's not our fault. It's so easy to pretend to be a girl without a heart. But, what really matters in this life, it's never the easy stuff you can get. What really matters is never easy. So, the real question comes to this: are you able to forget the thousands of lovable moments spent together within a second because of a single moment of poisonous misunderstanding? Or are you brave enough to not run away and just ask, ask for the truth?
Alison drives Emily home after the medical appointment. She offers to cook something because the brunette needs to eat well and it doesn't matter how many times Emily says she's not hungry, the blonde will not leave till she makes sure Emily ate something more than the leftovers of cold pizza which are on the fridge.
"We need to do something about your meals. You cannot nourish our baby with only takeaway food"
Alison says as she starts to make a mental list of all the groceries she will need to do for the brunette. God knows Emily has zero skills in the kitchen, but even then, she needs to put attention to what she eats, if not for her own good, for the baby's well-being. So many things to discuss besides nutrition that Alison is not sure with which she should start till she hears the low crying of the brunette. From the kitchen, the blonde rushes to the bedroom where Emily was crying alone.
"Em?! Emily, what is wrong?!"
The CEO is panicking when she sits beside the brunette at the edge of the bed, worrying for the worst because a miscarriage during the first months is so common. But, the baby is fine, it's just that…
"I don't want you to be with that blonde!"
"Huh?"
Between sobs and tears, Emily finally states what has been overwhelming her heart. She has no rights to Alison's personal life, she has no rights to ask Alison to not fall in love with someone else but even if she knows she has no right at all to many things, she doesn't can avoid to wish for it. And to that, Alison can just laugh.
"Are you seriously laughing right now?"
Alison has no intention to dismiss Emily's feelings, but she cannot help it, she finds hilarious how the brunette created an entire dramatic narrative in her mind.
"Why do you laugh?"
"Because I find it hilarious how you got everything wrong. I'm not dating Kara! I've no interest in Kara. How could I have eyes on someone else when you're still in my heart?"
"Am I?"
The laughs are gone as they stare at each other in the eyes. Once again, Alison spoke before thinking about her words, but she doesn't regret it because she spoke the truth. Despite how much she wants to rip Emily from her heart, she hasn't been able to do it, and at this pace, she doesn't know if she will ever be able to get over the brunette.
"I love you. I despise you. I want you. I resent you… I've so many heavy feelings for you, Emily and, I wish you were right and I could just move on so easily, but I can't. I don't know how…"
"Do you really hate me?"
"Hate is a strong word. And, thinking about it, I don't hate you. I couldn't even if I wanted to"
"All the pain you have suffered, and yet, you still have it in you to not hate me?"
Alison nods and Emily sadly chuckles because if she was doubting about her chances to get her back, now, it feels more impossible after seeing the beautiful person she's.
"I really don't deserve you…"
Emily says, tears falling from her eyes. Sadness reflected in her face as she looked down at the floor.
"I don't know why I cry…"
"Because, it hurts, Em. Our situation hurts"
The brunette tries to clean her face, but she fails miserably. So, it's to Alison to wipe the tears away. The makeup of the brunette smeared and Alison gulps hard because she hates to be the reason for such a gloomy face. So, she cleans Emily's face with so much tenderness that Emily leans forwards for a kiss.
It's salty, the feeling Alison gets when their lips make contact. And Emily thinks she misread the situation because the blonde is not kissing back, but, the moment the brunette pulls away, Alison chases her lips with so much hunger that both girls fall into bed.
One kiss led to another, and another and before thinking about it, both girls became detached of their clothes, of their fears, of their grudge as they made love once again. Alison always gets sleepy after doing it, and Emily feels content to lie down in her arms, naked as the blonde snuggles into her as she falls asleep.
'Sweet dreams, Ali…"
Emily mumbles before falling asleep too. And, while these two are having the sweetest dreams ever. In another apartment, another girl was always having a good nap on her couch till a strong knock woke her up.
"Who is it?"
Kara says with a sleepy voice. She has no clue who's at her door till she opens it and sees Lena, standing there, in front of her, with a little teddy bear between her hands.
"Lena. I thought we agreed no more gifts"
"It's not for you, Kara. It's for the baby…"
"What?! What baby? Wh-...?"
"Is it mine?"
"What?!"
"You know what, it doesn't matter…"
"Lena! What the hell…?!"
Before the blonde could formulate another word, Lena gets into the home, says how sorry she's for getting in without being welcome. Kara closes the door, she directs them to sit on the sofa and she makes coffee because no matter how many showers the CEO took, the smell of alcohol is still very present on her.
"I hope you didn't drive your way here"
"No, no, I called my driver…"
Lena doesn't want to give more details about how much she drank and why. She feels ashamed of it and Kara can read it in her face, that's why she doesn't make another comment on the subject, she just brings the two cups of coffee and frowns when Lena asks if it's decaf coffee for her.
"Lena, I'm not.."
"I'm not here to argue, Kara. I just…" (sighs) "Please just hear me out, okay?"
Kara nods and the dear Luthor takes a deep breath as she gets ready to say what she came to say.
"First of all. I want to say how much I hate all I put you through. I wanted to believe my lies were not a big deal, but that was just an easy excuse for my bad choices. If we're not together, there's no other one to blame than me"
Kara gulps hard, Lena sounds so raw, so broken and honest that she wants to believe she's really sorry for everything. But, how can she believe a word she says? The blonde wonders and, she wonders more why Lena softly puts in her hands the teddy bear she brought with her. Looking at it, it's an old teddy bear, not new, used over the years by no other than Lena.
"This is Mr Cuddles"
"Mr Cuddles?"
"Yeah, Mr Cuddles…"
Both girls chuckled at the name, it might sound very ridiculous, but that's the perfect name Lena found for the only real friend she had during her entire childhood.
"Now that I think about it, maybe I called him like that because cuddles are all I yearned for, when I was a kid"
Kara gets watery-eyes under such a revelation, she gets this big urge to hug the raven-haired woman and give her as many cuddles as possible. But, she doesn't move, letting Lena to continue.
"Regardless of the reason why the little stuffed animal got its name, this toy symbolises the most pure of my soul and nothing could make me happier than giving to our kid the purest part of myself"
"Our kid?"
The dear CEO gulps hard, there's again the question of whether it's their kid or not. But, thinking about it, does it really matter to her? Well…
"I don't care if the baby is not mine. I already love him as if it was mine, so…"
"Lena, I…"
"Please, Kara. Do not ask me how I know about the baby, but, I know. And, I don't know if you were planning to tell me or not, but, I know. And, if I have to be completely honest, my first reaction was far to be the best, but then, I looked at Mr Cuddles. I pictured our kid hugging it and all my doubts, all my fears just became nothing under such beautiful picture"
Kara chuckles, playing with the teddy bear, also imagining a little kid with Lena's features, playing with this toy, it's a very beautiful, imaginary picture.
"I don't deserve you. I don't deserve to have a baby with the sunshine you're, but, Kara, believe me when I say to you that no one will ever love you and this child, as much as I love you, the two of you mean so much to me, there are no words to describe how important you're. No one will love you as I do, not even Alison DiLaurentis"
"What? Alison, she…"
"She might be part of your life now, and I've no intention to destroy whatever you've with her. All I ask is a chance to be close to you and this baby. Because I want to love this baby as much as I love you"
Lena knees in front of Kara, tears rolling over her beautiful green eyes as she pleads one more time for a chance . A chance to do better, to be there for her and the baby. A chance to be there for her and this might be a big misunderstanding, but something is very clear, Lena deeply loves Kara and Kara…
"I love you, too…"
"Kara, do you really mean it?"
"I have never stopped to love you…"
Lena smiles, now both girls are in tears, happy tears which get mixed with a thousand kisses they share immediately. Kisses which lead them to bed and, if Kara wasn't pregnant before, there are big chances she will be after tonight.