Here's a very different one shot from what I normally do. Just lighthearted and silly!

Enjoy!

Robbery Gone Wrong

It was a Monday morning, the Krusty Krab had just opened for a new week. He still didn't know how everything went so wrong.

It was a cold, dark, rainy autumn day and most people had decided to stay home. Who could blame them? Why would you go out in such weather if you didn't need to?

Well, Ray did need to. He was a stingray, down on his luck and desperate for a way out. He needed money, then he could leave town and move to the city where there were more jobs available.

It was such a fool proof plan.

He knew Mr Krabs, owner of the most popular restaurant in the sea, was loaded. As in, very, very rich. He had even used the whole last week to observe the eatery and understand the roles of everyone there.

Mr Krabs – Owner and manager. Greedy, selfish and honestly, a bit of a weirdo. He was obsessed with his money and took any shortcuts available to avoid spending it, but surely there was a line.

Squidward – Cashier. Selfish, snob and kind of an asshole. He barely did any work at all and when he did, he spent the whole time complaining and taking out his anger on his coworkers and customers. He simply did not care about his job… or anything it seemed.

SpongeBob – Fry cook, cleaner and general errands boy. Stupid, friendly and an absolute annoyance to everyone around him. He was clearly a dedicated hard worker, he was the only reason that restaurant was still running! The kid did everything! Not only that but he did it all without complaint and with a big grin on his face. Disgusting.

Patrick – Unemployed. No idea why he was always there but he was. He was pretty much always eating except when he was messing around with his friends. Has no money so all his food is paid for by the fry cook. He was big and strong though, worth keeping an eye on.

Sandy – Mad Scientist and bully? Again, no idea why she spent so much time there. All she ever did was cause trouble with her experiments, complain about the unhealthy food and yell at people. Maybe she was some kind of security guard? Again, worth keeping an eye on.

And that was it. They were the only constants in the establishment, they were the only ones that would be there when Ray struck.

He marched through the rain, confident in his plan and his knowledge of his victims. They were all so stupid, this would be easy.

He entered the restaurant and scanned the room. On the left Patrick and Sandy were locked in an intense arm wrestle, Squidward was reading a magazine at the cash register. No sign of the boss or the fry cook.

Ray readjusted the sack thrown over his back, he placed his hand on the gun in his belt.

He stormed up to the register, the cashier didn't even blink.

"Gimme all the money. Now." He snarled as he opened the sack expectantly, Squidward glanced up at him with a bored expression.

"Or what?" He asked sarcastically.

Ray pulled the gun from his belt and shot up at the ceiling, dust rained down on him.

"Or I kill you and everyone else here!" He threatened,

"Go ahead." Squidward went back to reading his magazine, completely unfazed.

"What?"

"I said, go ahead." Squidward repeated, "Kill us."

Ray stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do next.

"Where are the other two?" Ray demanded furiously.

"Busy." Squidward replied shortly.

"Bring them out here. Now." Ray commanded, pointing the gun at the cashier. Squidward gave a heavy sigh at the inconvenience.

"A please would've been nice." He rolled his eyes as he sat forward. He spoke into the microphone. "Mr Krabs, SpongeBob – come to the dining room immediately so I can get back to reading."

Mr Krabs came out of his office looking mildly annoyed, SpongeBob bounded out the kitchen with a smile.

"I'm here!" He greeted, "What's up?"

"Right!" Ray snapped, shooting the ceiling again. "Everyone down on the ground! This is a robbery, put the money in the bag and no one dies!"

"You're paying for that!" Mr Krabs snapped as he eyed the holes in his ceiling, rain pouring through. "Do you know how much that costs to repair!?"

"Wait…" SpongeBob gasped staring at the robber, Ray smirked – finally someone was getting it. "Robbery!?"

The sponge immediately started screaming and running in circles around the dining room, Ray watched the bizarre behaviour with confusion. What kind of hell had he entered?

He then noticed Sandy and Patrick were still arm wrestling.

"I thought I told you all to get on the ground!" He yelled over the screams.

"In a minute!" Sandy snapped, "We're busy!"

"Yeah!" Patrick ground out, "She's not stronger than me!"

"I am so!"

"You are not!"

Ray stared as the arguing and the screaming continued, he was starting to get a headache. He turned to face the two at the cash register, Mr Krabs was glaring at him with his arms crossed while Squidward was relaxing and reading his magazine again.

"What the hell is going on?" Ray mumbled before yelling, "Do you people not understand what's happening!? Give me the money or you die!"

"I'm ok with that." Squidward shrugged, "Kill me, don't kill me… whatever."

"What?" Ray gaped at the nonchalance.

"Well, if I die I don't have to work this week." Squidward continued, barely paying attention. "So, it's whatever."

Ray stared at him in disbelief, then turned to the boss.

"I'd rather you killed every soul here than give you a cent!" He nodded firmly, "Do it! Yer not getting a penny outta me!"

"You'd seriously rather die than hand over the money?" Ray asked, bemused.

"Absolutely. No question." The greedy boss nodded without hesitation.

Ray swayed where he stood as the little yellow sponge ran past screaming for the hundredth time, the arguing from the back pounded his brain. What was wrong with these people?

"What the hell!?" He yelled in frustration, SpongeBob ran past him again so he grabbed the fry cook by the back of his shirt. "SHUT UP!"

The screaming continued.

"That never works." Squidward informed him, "Believe me."

Ray growled as he lifted the boy off his feet, pocketed his gun and slapped a hand over the mouth. The scream cut off, the sponge stared at him with wide scared eyes.

"Thank Neptune." Ray breathed at the silence, it was then he noticed Mr Krabs and Squidward smirking at him. It was like they knew something he didn't, it was very annoying.

It was then he realised the arguing had stopped.

He slowly turned around to see Patrick and Sandy standing before him, looking furious and ready to kill. He gulped and stepped back, confused at what had happened to finally cause everyone to pay attention to him.

It was then he felt someone close in closer behind him, a mouth was near his ear.

"Just so you know," Mr Krabs snickered quietly, "Patrick and Sandy don't like it when someone like you touches my fry cook like that… I don't think you understand just how much of a grave mistake you've made by grabbing that boy."

Ray gulped fearfully, he let go of the boy's mouth.

"Please don't rob us!" SpongeBob whimpered, begging. "I don't want you to!"

Ray yelped as he felt Mr Krabs grab the fry cook and pull him free, the boy stood with his two coworkers and cried hysterically.

The stingray didn't get a chance to say anything else before the two tough friends jumped on him.

Mr Krabs and Squidward watched the robber get beat up in amusement, it was then Squidward tapped SpongeBob on the shoulder. The boy sniffled and looked up at him.

"What?" He asked pathetically.

"He's decided to listen to you and not rob us." Squidward smiled as Patrick and Sandy dragged the unconscious would-be robber out the double doors.

"Really?" He asked hopefully, brightening up.

"Yup! Good job lad!" Mr Krabs nodded proudly.

"So…" SpongeBob asked carefully, "I really saved the day?"

"Of course you did!" Sandy chuckled as she and Patrick joined the three again, "You always do!"

"Hooray!" Patrick cheered and hugged his best friend.

Outside, Ray lay on his back in the rain. Bruised, beaten and completely confused about the morning's events. He felt like he had just returned from some weird alternate dimension, or from a whole other world.

He warned every criminal he knew to never try anything at the Krusty Krab, it just wasn't worth it. He also warned them that if they ever saw a little yellow sponge with a squirrel and a starfish, don't even look at the kid! Just run the other direction!

Thanks for reading! Please leave a review if you enjoyed that!