Second Opinions
"How are our wounded colleagues, Mr. Palmer?" Ducky asked, as Jimmy returned from the hospital visit.
The young morgue assistant looked at him, a look of concern crossing over his face.
"I think, maybe… nah." Jimmy seemed sheepishly unsure of his assessment.
"Spit it out, Mr. Palmer," Ducky said, trying to sound encouraging, but unable to stop the slight hint of exasperation from seeping into his tone.
"I think it's possible they're being over-medicated, Doctor." There. He'd said it.
"How so, my boy?" Ducky was genuinely curious now. Jimmy hemmed and hawed a moment, then finally said. "Agent McGee called me a good man and welcomed me to the family. Agent DiNozzo seemed to go into some kind of drug-induced trance. He was completely oblivious to his surroundings. And Agent Gibbs…" he trailed off. Ducky had to stop himself from smiling as the younger man clearly failed an attempt to suppress a shudder of some kind.
"Mr. Palmer, did you take them coffee, like you said you would?"
Palmer nodded. "Black for Agent Gibbs, latte for Agent McGee, hazelnut for Agent DiNozzo."
"They were in their happy place then, Jimmy. Jethro has been overheard calling the hospital coffee 'horse piss.' " Jimmy coughed as he tried to hold back a snort. "That's an accurate assessment, Dr. Mallard. I wouldn't give that stuff to my worst enemy. Except maybe one…" A small wicked grin passed over his face as he thought of Abby's former lab assistant, Chip. He had been nobody's friend, as it had turned out.
"Well, even so… I'll check in on them when I take my turn for the coffee run. Over medicated, you say?" Jimmy nodded. "Well, I shall see for myself. Were there any other symptoms to support this diagnoses?"
Jimmy thought a moment. "I did stop by once, and I could have sworn I heard singing. It was a silly little tune… but when I looked in, Agent McGee and Agent DiNozzo were sleeping. That only left Agent Gibbs. I peeked around the door and he had the stupidest smile I've ever seen."
Ducky raised an eyebrow. "Indeed. Well, there is more than one way to skin a cat, Mr. Palmer. And more than one way to soothe three big babies with big owies to sleep, besides the pharmaceutical method."
Jimmy grinned to himself as Ducky turned to retrieve his jacket. "I'll be back in an hour. Hold down the fort, will you, my good fellow?"
He knew exactly what Dr. Mallard had in mind.
The biggest question was, which story would he use to soothe the battered, aching agents into peaceful slumber?