Kel calmed down quickly, or so everyone thought. Her Yamani mask helped Kel. She was able to show none of the thoughts and emotions that plagued her mind and soul. Refugees would ask her for help, she would have meetings with her staff, she would participate in the activities the refugees held. But no matter how much Kel looked like she was calm, inside she was churning.
Her friends got over it quickly – too quickly, Kel thought. Yes they were used to war and death, but Cleon had been their friend. He had been their comrade and companion, their colleague and their brother.
And he was gone. Kel, for all she knew of love and death, could not understand what she was feeling. She had seen death before, she had caused it many a time. But how was it that someone she loved left her so quickly and so easily? She knew she should talk to someone. Neal, most likely. He understood matters of love. His heart fluttered from girl to girl for years before he found true love. He had his heart broken many a time. He understood the pain, and he understood what it took to leave it behind.
But it was different, wasn't it, the difference between never realizing love that was based on what you had seen of another, and love that was true. Kel had been as finicky as Neal before. Flitting between Cleon and – god forbid – Dom, Kel really never knew what she felt until it was sure. Until she knew that something could come of it, Kel could never really commit to anything. Was she fickle? No, she wasn't, she couldn't be. She had loved Cleon with all her heart, and him being gone meant that she was done. She wouldn't let herself do that.
She would never forget him. No matter how many times her friends told her to get past it, to overcome it, Kel knew she would always have part of it in her. And she didn't mind. In fact, she wanted it that way. She didn't want to go through that again, and so she remembered.
Though she was still in pain, Kel got on with her life; she had to. She had a refugee camp to run.
-----
Weeks passed as Kel slowly healed. She smiled again, though weakly and infrequently, but she was happy. She still remembered, and she still thought about it. Nothing made her smile enough to forget about Cleon, even for a moment.
But she still enjoyed herself again. That was all that mattered.
"I think it's a good idea." Neal said.
Kel shrugged. "I don't know, Neal. It seems silly."
Dom shrugged. "Well, of course it's silly! Isn't that the entire point?"
Kel smiled. "I guess, but it still seems silly to have a ball. These are refugees, we're talking about, not nobles."
Neal shrugged. "It's Midwinter, Kel. And it's not a ball, it's a party. No one has dress clothes here, of course, but you put on a clean tunic and you look perfectly presentable. We assign some of the young boys to wait on everyone, and just like at home, people give to their friends what they have."
Kel propped her head on her hand. "I still don't understand how you came up with this," she said, shaking her head.
Dom shrugged. "It does make sense, though. It would help the refugees get closer. Give each other gifts, maybe assign one person to give someone else a gift on behalf of everyone. That way everyone gets a gift, and maybe makes a friend."
Kel sighed. "Fine, it sounds like a nice time. But I'm not organizing it," she said. "I have enough to think about running this camp. I would rather not organize a party as well."
Neal grinned. "You know, I've always wanted to play host!"
Dom smirked. "Hey, maybe Kel brought a dress or two she could lend you! A bit of altering, they would do fine..."
Kel shook her head. "You two are unbelievable. I have to get some work done. I'll see you tomorrow. I want to see plans for this party, because as much as I want nothing to do with it, I know you are going to botch it up somehow."
Dom looked insulted. "Goodness, Kel! don't you have faith in us?"
Kel shook her head. "None whatsoever," she said, turning on her heel and walking back to headquarters.
Kel put her head in her hands and sighed when she reached her desk. It always amazed her, how much work the camp could be. Even after the years she had spent at New Hope, anything could still surprise her. Whether it was the problems they got themselves into, or just the things their children said, there was always something new.
"This is ridiculous!" She groaned, leaning back in her chair.
"Is it really that bad?" A voice said.
Kel almost cried out in shock – the sudden memory of Cleon came rushing back to her. She looked up. "Dom!" She said, relief and sadness flowing through her at the same time.
He sauntered in and sat down at a chair across from her. "Sergeant Domitan of Masbolle, reporting to duty, my lady!" He said with a salute.
Kel raised an eyebrow.
Eurgain was caught up in practicing, but she said you needed help, and her other clerks are busy... so she sent me. Don't see why you need me, really, but it is much better than patrolling or being on carpentry duty."
Kel chuckled. "Fine, Dom. You can look over the inventory. I need to know what we need in the next stock."
Dom nodded, pulling his chair towards the table. They worked for a while, talking about the inventory and chatting about New Hope gossip, until Dom spoke suddenly.
"You don't need to feel alone, you know."
Kel looked up. "Pardon me?"
"You don't need to be alone," Dom said. "Neal and I have both noticed this, Neal more than myself, I must say. You've been quieter, Kel. And while you still smile, you have done it much less. The conversation we had earlier would have made you smile before. You can talk to us, Kel."
"I know," Kel said quietly, looking at the ground, "I think I might find Neal in a bit."
Dom's face fell, but Kel did not see it, as her head was down.
They went back to their work after that, saying little to each other.
Hours later, when all of Kel's work was done, after she had checked all of the posts and made sure the next meal was being made, Kel went to the infirmary to seek out Neal.
"Good afternoon!" He said with a smile, ushering a small child with a scraped elbow out of the infirmary. "What can I do for you, Kel?"
Kel shrugged. "I'm just checking up. Dom helped me with my paperwork, so I don't have anything to do at the moment. Is everything okay around here?"
Neal nodded. "It's pretty good. I haven't had much business since that flu went down, which is always a good sign. I've had a few injuries and a couple of sick people, but for a camp this size, we are doing remarkably well."
Kel nodded. "That's always good to hear." She thought about it. What would asking Neal do? What would she ask? Hey, Neal, how did you get over your broken heart so often? What's the best remedy for this kind of pain? That wasn't the answer. The answer was in living her life. If she could do that, she would be fine. Dom was right in that she smiled less, and she knew she needed to do it more often again, and she promised herself she would.
She changed her mind. She did want something to do with Neal and Dom's party. She did want to help them, because she knew it would get her mind off of whatever else she would think about.
"I have thought about it, Neal," she said, holding her head high, "and I have decided that this Midwinter party is a wonderful idea. Harvest season is upon us, next week we are putting more people in the fields. It's already getting cool, which means we are going to have a very cold winter. The refugees will need something to keep them entertained. I approve, and you have my help wherever you need it."
Neal grinned. "That's my girl, Kel!" He sighed. "I wish I could be home for Midwinter this year."
Kel leaned on the table beside Neal, who also leaned back onto it. "Let me tell you something, Neal." She said. "I received a message yesterday. I decided not to tell anyone about it, believing that no one would do their jobs if I did. But I received a message from Lord Wyldon, and he told me that we will be home before the next harvest. The towns are almost rebuilt, and though it will be difficult, the people will be able to go home."
Neal looked up. "You're serious?"
Kel nodded. "Absolutely."
Neal practically jumped. "Kel, this is great! This is amazing! Oh, I have to go..."
Kel put up her hand. "Neal! You do not tell a living, breathing soul what I just told you! I should not have said it in the first place, do you understand me? If the refugees find out, who knows what they will do. They could easily not put as much effort into their jobs, knowing they would be away from this all soon. They would get restless this winter. Who knows? I have decided, Neal. I will tell them in the summer. Besides, we are not completely sure. If it is a bad winter, work will go slowly, and we may not be able to go home until the next spring."
Neal nodded. "Fine. Be that way."
Kel patted him on the shoulder. "It will be fine, Neal! You will get to see Yuki soon enough." Saying that pained her, knowing that Neal would have someone to go home to, and she would not.
Neal grinned. "Thanks, mother! You always know the right thing to say."
The bell at the mess hall rang for dinner. The two friends walked out of the infirmary towards the mess hall, hungry and happy.
Neal's party was as much work than Kel expected. They made a circle of all of the adult refugees and soldiers, and a circle of all the children. Each person was given a name, and that was who they had to give a gift to. The circle meant that every person got a gift, and no one was left out.
Kel looked over Neal's plans for the mess hall. He had made tables, every person in the camp with a place. There was a table for everyone at headquarters, and tables of soldiers and refugees, intermingled. He had done a good job. "You'd make a wonderful wife for some rich noble, Neal." She said.
Neal glared at her. "Thank you, I have always aimed highly," he said dryly. "Come on, Kel, it will be great! The children made decorations for the mess hall, and everyone is putting on their best clothes, though few have much. They will all enjoy themselves! You should too!"
Kel looked up at him. "I know, Neal, I'm just teasing you."
He shrugged. "Fine, Kel. Come on, I already checked the mess hall, it's ready. The bell should ring for dinner soon. Don't you have any nice clothes? A dress or something?"
Kel frowned. "Even if I had one, I would not wear a dress, Neal. But I will put on a fresh tunic. Is that good enough for you?"
Neal grinned. "Sounds wonderful." He stood up. "I myself have to go get dressed, and make myself all pretty."
Kel smiled weakly. "Have fun." She said, her head resting on her hand, looking at him. When he was gone, she went to her own rooms. She slipped on clean breeches and a tunic, and tied her hair behind her head with a piece of ribbon. "I've got to do something about this." She muttered, pulling long strands out of her face. She washed her face, picked up her gift, and walked down to the mess hall as the bell rang.
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Okay, this chapter was really random and uneventful, but I must say, most of this story will be. Well, that's not really true. It was like this because I couldn't think of any better way to start it. it should be fine later on, I promise! Next chapter or two, it should get interesting.
Lady-kitty: thank you!
Wake-Robin: hmm... it's kind of obvious, isn't it?
Ethuiliel: thanks!
Soccerchick-08: no, go ahead, by all means. But stop guessing right, damn it! No Merric did not have all one hundred men. That is why they retreated back to the camp and let the refugees on the wall finish them off.
Dreamerdoll: hmm, this seems to be a theme, this hatred of Cleon... I think I have four or five reviews that say it!
Atlanta Enchanted: more loathing! I love that word!
Ethuiliel (again): this story is too deep? This is not a deep story... it is my 'unolimbo wants to write some happy crap where nothing happens' story.
Lady of Masbolle: I see... haha. I like the jerry springer reference. I just wanted her to be solving something with refugees... but I couldn't decide what... so it kinda sucked.
Fhire: hmm... harsh, but ultimately true. I am sort of losing my touch, but whatever. I didn't really write this story thinking it would be as good as my other stories (which are also getting progressively worse), but I just really wanted to write about this. You know? And Kel did not fight because she was really upset and not in the mood to do anything, and Dom's reasons were not entirely noble... he's a sneaky one.
Lady-kitty (also again): wow, I made someone cry? Score!
Alice: haha, more Cleon hatred! Wow!
Ladybug912: gah! Cleon hatred again! Don't worry, I agree! I tried to write this story as a Kel Cleon, but I couldn't do it!
The Former Kelly Masbolle: I do indeed remember you! Wow, your review is very poetic... but I'm glad you like it!
Alannalovingwriter: well, I read it sort of as she knew that she couldn't really be with him, so she almost forced herself to stop loving him. I guess... it doesn't make sense. Let's pretend, shall we?
Alenor: ooh, shopping... have fun! Glad you like it!
PsychoLioness13: hmm, I guess that makes quite a bit of sense. Oh well. I think it turned out pretty well!
Well, I am far too lazy to bother getting a quote today... sleepy. I love weekends! Please review (try to avoid flames, okay? Constructive criticism, people!) and enjoy!
-unolimbo