'TIL I COLLAPSE - PART EIGHTEEN: HAVING DOUBTS (PG-13)
SEQUEL TO: ORDINARY WORLD
SUMMARY: After the last battle, Tommy reflects on all that has happened with Mindshatter and the painful thoughts about losing his one true love. Can he overcome them and win the war against their toughest challenge yet?
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Power Rangers, I only own the power of this story and how it works around the characters of the PR world. I do own property of Mindshatter, Dinoshade and the Cybots, so if you don't like it, you just gotta deal. You're sitting there reading this anyway. I really do hope you've enjoyed your stay in my world. 'Cuz you're gonna be gearing up for a whole lot more surprises.
A/N: This was one chapter that wasn't in the original script, but I figured I would add it in since it needs to be discussed. We haven't seen much of the whole husband/wife thing among Tommy and Kim, and I think it's gotten rather serious since that last battle. I hope you like it. Catch you on the flip side. Leave behind a review and I'll see you when I do.
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"After all these years of living in fear of never ever seeing you again, I thought it would scar me forever. But with all that has happened since you have returned, I do not think I have ever been so scared for you. For us, as a couple, and now as husband and wife. I do not know how much more I can take knowing I may lose you in the end. Nothing could ever heal the scars I will have if I lose you." -Eclyptyk Neo
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Later that evening.
Kim had been tucked away in the bed as Tommy returned with a fresh cup of tea for her. He didn't oppose for feeling like her servant at this point, he just had other things on his mind. It was evident in how he stood, came and went through the room almost like a mindless zombie. It scared Kim a little to find him in that state of mind.
She called out to him quietly before he had a chance to leave the room again. "Tommy?"
Tommy stopped, letting out a breath before turning to look at his wife sitting on the bed. "What's up, Beautiful?"
"Well, I was wondering if you could tell me that," she said with great concern. "I know that look in your eyes, Handsome. There is something wrong. Tell me what it is."
Tommy sighed as he moved around to the other side of the room.
He pulled the curtains aside as he looked at the moonlit night. The sky was clear and calm. The air outside was cool and refreshing as he slowly pushed the window open. He took a deep breath, sucking in the cool air into his lungs as he felt the arms of his wife wrap around him.
"Tommy, please. Tell me what's wrong," Kim whispered as he laid her head on his back, wrapping her arms tightly around him.
Tommy leaned against the window, palms flat on the cool shelf along the window. He looked back out into the sky, into the woods. The images of the last battle played through his mind. When, stuck in Trent's body wearing the white DT suit, he grabbed the device and within seconds was thrown to the ground and watched as the yellow DT ranger, his wife at the time, take the blow for him. He could recall the moments after that, nearly a blur. But a rage unlike any he could begin to describe, except during his evil reign. He felt it run through every vein as his primary objective was to destroy anyone he thought was a threat. His body shook with fear, but the rage felt great. It gave him the boost of energy to take out both Dinoshade and Mesogog with ease.
But where he thought this rage would end, it hadn't. He still felt it inside him just wanting to take control again. And as he jerked his head to push away the images of the last battle, the images of him in his zord took place. The battle with the zords that could have ended more tragically. And finally, their first battle with the cybots and Dinoshade and how he forced Kim into hiding. And looking at a huge loss for the team. Again, he felt his blood boil, but as he felt the weight of his wife rest up on him, it slowly went away.
He forced out another breath as the images left him and he looked out into the beauty of the calm night. He slowly turned around, pulling Kim into a hug. She had melted into his chest as tears streaked her face. He knew she was worried about him, and that's not what she wanted. She couldn't be put under stress, not after hearing the news that she is in the stages of a miscarriage.
Tommy leaned over the small petite woman in his embrace, laying a few kisses on her head. "Thank you, Beautiful."
Kim wiped her tears and looked up into the alert falcon eyes of her lover. "For what?"
"For being here. Without you, I don't think I could ever make it through this," he whispered as they began to rock back and forth, still locked in each other's embrace.
"I know I shouldn't, but I am a little worried about you, baby," Kim said as she push her ear into his chest. She could hear his heartbeat, beating slightly faster than need be. And she knew it wasn't for the fact they were really close. It was something else.
Tommy pulled her back, looking down into her honey-brown eyes, she had looked up into his. "I won't lie to you, Kim. But ever since Mindshatter showed up, I have never been so scared of being a ranger. He has definitely been our toughest challenge yet, and now that he, somehow, resurrected Mesogog, we got a lot more to deal with than we might be capable of holding onto. I just don't know if we can handle it."
"You're strong, Tommy. You're tough. I would have thought that going through some military training would toughen you up," she smiled, hoping to lighten the mood.
Tommy looked away. He had to admit that he had gotten a lot more serious about what he did due to his time spent in the Army, or more the Army National Guard. He never said that he was retired though, just not active. He knew that Kim was trying to cheer him up, and that what he was trying to accept it, but it was so hard. There was so much that needed to be done, and Kim was trying to do what Adam had requested. He had to cater to her, and only her. "Don't get me wrong, Beautiful, it did. It's just how can someone continue with something as saving the world if in the last few battles we've had, we haven't had a clear victory? It makes me feel like we aren't doing enough."
Kim stood up taller as she pushed her lips against his. For a moment, the sparks had lit once their lips met, but as she had parted his lips and deepened the kiss, all thoughts were scrambled and unclear. The only thing that mattered was to cherish the moment in which they could enjoy each other's company. Explore into the depths of each other as the kiss had continued, Kim planted Tommy on the wall.
The minutes seemed slow around them as they began to struggle for air. Slowly, but sincerely, Tommy had pulled away long enough to catch his breath. He hadn't realize he had pulled her so close to him during their exploration that he could feel their hearts racing, almost as one.
Their eyes met again, as they searched through the other's soul. In words they could only keep to themselves, they could see into the other's thoughts and feelings. They could feel the sparks of how and why they had chosen the other to continue their life with for eternity.
Tommy had leaned over to lay another kiss on his wife's lips. With a hand wrapped around the back of his neck, she pulled him down closer to her lips. They shared a few quick kisses as she smiled against his lips. And he couldn't help but smile back as he pulled her into another warm, wet, passionate kiss.
Like before, it had them searching and exploring the other. In turn, they each let out a set of moans and groans that seemed to trigger the spot only their lover could hit.
After a good few minutes had passed, Tommy broke the kiss again catching his breath. He slowly opened his eyes as Kim's eyes fluttered open, and she knew at that point, he could/would bear all he needed to say to her.
She took his hands into hers and backtracked toward the bed. Slowly he followed. And as they got settled into the comfort of the bed, she melted into his side, running her hands through his spiked hair.
For a long time, no words could be spoken. Only being in the company of the other gave them reason to stay silent. Tommy wrapped his strong, protective arms around his wife, laying a kiss on her head.
"I have to admit, out of all the times we've had some close calls, this one had to have been the closest," Tommy finally spoke, his voice barely above a whisper. "I never felt so scared for you, Kim. I seriously thought I'd lose you forever."
When the words had escaped his mouth, Kim felt the tears welt in her eyes. "I could almost agree." she sat up, looking away as she tried to re-collect the last few hours of their day. "I thought I would never open my eyes after that last hit. I don't know, but before that hit, I fell into a trance. It felt like I wasn't even in a body, just a free spirit in the vastness of space alongside Kira. I don't know how to really describe it. I could hear voices. Your voice and the others. Kira and me were just talking, and then we saw two lights. Pink and yellow. I had followed the pink and she had followed the yellow. And when my eyes opened, I saw you looming over me in the comfort of the living room."
Tommy sat up and looked over at his wife. The words stuck in his head, but it didn't seem to make much sense to him. But that didn't matter now. "You're alive. And that's all that should really matter to me. No more of this nightmare."
"You're alive, too," she turned to look at him. She melted back into his embrace as his arms locked around her.
"About those minutes following the break of the curse," Tommy began. He closed his eyes, as he forced air into his lungs. He saw the painful images of him catching the device, getting pulled aside and watched as his teammate/lover had taken a brutal beating. He felt the stream of rage run through him as his arm began to shake. "I feel it. A new type of rage. Energizing. Almost as if it is the only means for me to ever defeat these guys. I don't want it to, though. It shouldn't be it. I just..."
Kim had put a finger to his lips. "Shhh! I know you're scared. I have to admit, I can feel your rage, too as if it was second nature to me. But you're stronger than it, and you know that no matter what, light will always break the dark."
Tommy nodded slowly as he found his hand rest on Kim's stomach. Kim had noticed the gesture and placed her hand above it, their eyes fell on it. "I don't want you to worry about me, Kim. As much as you should, you can't. Not in your condition."
"I don't want you to take all these risks though," she said quietly as she looked up.
Tommy looked into her eyes, leaning over and laid a kiss on her lips. "I'm all about taking risks, Beautiful. But for your sake, I could just put up my suit and cater to you like Adam said."
Kim shook her head. "Don't try to pick sides about this, Tommy. I know how much you're still needed in helping the team..."
"But you should be my first priority. You're my wife," he protested, his voice rising slightly.
"And you also got a job to do about saving and protecting the world. Who else is gonna be there to guide the teens? They need someone who knows the game well. And they've grown rather close to you as a mentor. A friend. And a teacher."
"Yeah, until the school board decided to enforce that stupid rule about students and teachers creating as much as a little friendship outside the classroom. Now, as teachers, we have to be careful about what we do with our students. Stupid ass school board. You got that memo regarding that, didn't you?" Tommy shook his head, scoffing. He could recall a few days ago, a new policy going into major effect at school regarding what was okay for a student to do with their teacher outside of class. Even a simple gesture as offering a ride home after practice or a little tutor time at the library was being looked into.
"Yeah, I did. And personally, I think it's bull," Kim nodded with a little smile. She had to agree with him. The tone in his voice made it clear that he didn't like that rule all too much. "But, what we're doing for the teens is helping them out. They are getting the best sorta advice about what they do."
"Besides, outside of class I do consider myself more of their mentor. Someone does have to keep them in shape and make sure they are getting the most out of their 'after school' activities."
"The school board just got most strict since we lost Principal Randall."
"Just glad we don't have to deal with that witch. I mean, nothing personal to Elsa or anything, of course not. It's just ever since the curse was broken she's a whole different person. She remembers everything, and she wants to try and forget all that stuff. I don't blame her. But she's really kept us in line, both as Randall and as Santos. I'm kinda glad that we have someone like that keeping an eye out."
Kim nodded as another smile passed her lips. "I don't think I could really think of anyone else that would be able to pull it off like her. I give her a lot of credit for all she does for us as a school."
Tommy had to agree with her. He had given more respect to Elsa now that her status as a principal was under constant check. But she made sure that things got done and lead the school in disciplinary action towards troublemakers.
Again it fell silent as Tommy pulled Kim closer to him, his hands planted firmly on her stomach. They sat there encased in each others embrace, enjoying the silence that followed.
"I know it's too early to tell, or possibly ask, but have you looked into what name we shall give to our child?" Tommy whispered into her ear as he laid a kiss on her shoulder.
"Actually, I have thought about that. I kinda thought it would be nice to name him David, if it turns out to be a boy. Or if it was a girl, Arianna. Yet, you know how girls can be. We are very undecided about things," she shrugged.
Tommy laughed. "I like the names. They're nice. But there is that thing that leads to insecurity if you're always undecided."
Kim felt offended by his statement, turning to slap him in the shoulder. "Tommy!"
"I'm kidding, baby. I'm sorry. But sometimes, you women can be so insecure, or dramatic, about what goes on in your life it's something us guys can't help but not care about," he shrugged, catching her wrists before she could hit him again.
"Ever heard of the phrase, 'When women get mad or upset they go shopping, and when men get mad or upset they go to war.' Yeah, what is it with men always having to be the knight in shining armor? Or wanting to rule a country all to yourselves? Or swinging that dick around like it's your only means of conversation with a women?" she countered, a giggle passing her lips.
Tommy was appalled by her last statement, grabbing his chest and gasping for air. He mocked her back, with a smile. "I'm hurt. Talking about my fellow brothers out there who is just trying to do their job. Besides, does it hurt for some guys to be charming?"
"Or be complete assholes?""Yes, there are a good number of them out there, including me at times. But even you gotta get down on your knees and be rewarded for dealing with a guy like me."
"Yet, it's so easy to bend you to my whim," she countered, her voice in a velvet tone.
"Only 'cuz I know with a body like yours we can do wonders." he leaned into her, teasing her with a heated breath.
"Like now?" she asked quietly, blowing a warm breath his way.
"But first," he said slowly as he pulled open the side drawer. He pulled out a small container of Altoids, opening it up for her. "Breath mint?"
"Thomas!" Kim smacked him in the shoulder as he laughed, tossing the container back on the table. He wrapped his arms around her, but as he tried to kiss her, he pushed his lips away. "Do you want to sleep on the couch?"
"That's harsh. And you know you can't make me sleep on the couch. You'd miss me too damn much."
"One night wouldn't do no harm." she shrugged.
"Not if it's doctor's orders to cater to your every commanding wish," he countered, feeling the serious tone in her voice.
"Since you put it that way..." she thought for a moment. She pulled herself closer to her husband, laying a few kisses on his lips. "We're both pretty stressed... I think a little relaxation in the tub could suffice for now."
"Oh, but we're already cuddled up in bed," he whined as he slowly moved off the bed, still having Kim locked in his arms.
"You don't want me to give you a nice scrub down?" she whispered into his ear. The heated breath sent chills down his spine.
As much as he would try to resist her beauty and charm, there were times he would fail. And he knew that at a time like this, something like a nice bubble bath together wouldn't do no harm. He got to his feet and slowly moved into the bathroom.
to be continued...
A/N: I'll see you next chapter. I'm kinda lost in other thoughts at the moment, so give me a break, please. I am sorry about the status of being extremely behind. But, you'll get by. I'll see you in the lime light. May the Powers Always Protect You.