It Finally Happened: Part XXV
An "All-day" tour of the Kennedy Space Center, if it had come even a year earlier would have utterly thrilled the one-time "Rocket Booster." Instead, Ron became bored very quickly listening to the guide prattling on about the NASA space program and their achievements. Compared to what the Middleton Space Center had done, it all seemed so backwards and primitive.
Then too, this was something he usually shared with Kim. Yes, he knew this was supposed to be family time, but they didn't even get to the Cape before he was thinking about her, wanting to at least be near her. Even though they had mutually agreed to back down last night he still felt closer to her than ever before.
Ron was getting better at thinking logically and his rational mind said that physically being apart like they were at that moment was not truly a bad thing, that the way they felt for each other was so strong that they were as together apart as they were if they were physically joined. That was all fine and good, but he still found himself wishing he was with her. Every moment they had together seemed to fly by like it was standing still. Their vacation, not just this trip but their whole summer together was rocketing by. In just over a month their senior year would begin and who knew what that would bring. They certainly wouldn't have as many classes together. Kim was taking several college level courses, classes Ron didn't even come close to qualifying for. They would have less and less time together as time went on. Even if by some miracle he got into college, it seemed highly unlikely they would attend the same school, let alone have classes together.
All that made him very jealous of their time together this first summer.
The day seemed to drag on forever. Ron could have recited almost verbatim what their guide was saying about each display. Rockets had always been his thing, one of the reasons he idolized Kim's father so much, but, without Kim…
He spent the entire ride back to the suite in anticipation of being reunited with her. He made no effort to hide his disappointment when he found the place empty. It seemed the Possibles were having a family dinner with Nana, leaving the Stoppables to basically fend for themselves for this particular meal.
Gene immediately camped out on the patio once they got back, reading his paper out on one of the lounge chairs.
That was enough for Ron. If they were just going to do what they did at home, then family day was over anyway.
"I'm going out." He said after changing into flip flops and his board shorts.
"Ron, come in here for a minute. I need to talk to you." His mother said from the kitchen.
She put down the utensils, trying to give him a look that was supposed to be understanding and motherly. "Ron, you think you're in love with Kim, don't you?"
"I don't think anything, Mom, I love her with all my heart…I have for a long time." He answered quickly, a little taken aback by her choice of words.
"I'm sure you feel that way right now, but she's always been such a good friend to you, I think you might be confusing those feelings for romantic feelings."
"No, I'm not confused. I might not be the sharpest tool in the shed when it comes to a lot of things, but this I'm sure about. Kim's my best friend and my girlfriend. Both. I don't think there could be one without the other."
"Ronnie, I know you think that now, but you don't have any experience with this. Kim is the only girl you have ever been around for any time, so it's perfectly natural for you to be attracted to her, but I'm afraid since she's decided to indulge in a little love-play with you that it's clouded your judgment."
"What do you mean, Mom?" he was starting to get a sinking feeling about where she was going with this.
"Kim is a very nice girl. She's been raised by very good parents and now she's finally deciding to experiment a little. She's afraid she will be hurt by boys she doesn't know as well as you, so you make a good, safe partner for her to test the waters."
"What do you mean?"
"Son, guys like she has gone with in the past want girls who have some experience. Kim was raised to be a nice girl, but she hasn't attracted the kind of boys she seems to like and I think that has something to do with it. She probably thinks that if she paired up with you it would be a lot less likely she'd get hurt."
"Get hurt, Mom, I'd never hurt her."
"That's exactly what I'm saying. She knows you are hopelessly devoted to her and even if she wasn't any good the first time you wouldn't know any better. If she went with one of those pretty boys she chases after the first time, he might not want her and she would be devastated."
"Wait a second. You mean to tell me you think Kim is just using me to get experience…doing it?"
"Yes, Ron. It pains me to tell you this, but I've seen it so many times before with popular girls like her. I'm just so afraid the way the two of you have been going at it lately that you're setting yourself up to get hurt pretty badly when she moves on."
The very thought of Kim 'moving on' was devastating to him. It was inconceivable. What they had was real, wasn't it? "Where are you getting this? Kim isn't like that at all…and you think that way about me? That she can't feel about me the way I feel about her because I'm not some pretty boy like Mankey? That all I am is some kind of tool?"
"Son, how can you explain a girl like that sleeping with you?"
"Sleeping with? Mom! We haven't…even if we were, did it ever occur to you that maybe she found out that running around with those empty headed creeps was wrong for her and maybe I was the one she wanted all along? Is it so hard to think that maybe she's in love with me? That maybe she wants to have sex with me because I'm the one who turns her on, not just as a stepping stone to some pretty boy with bleached hair? Is that all you think of me?" Shock was slowly starting to turn to something darker, anger boiling up from inside.
"Ronnie, you're my precious little man, but let's be realistic. You're not strong, tall and let's face it, you're not as good looking as some of these boys. And don't try to play coy with me about Kim. I know the two of you have been carrying on for quite some time. The stories do get back to me about you going parking on Logging Camp Road and the way the two of you disappear into each other's homes when we're not around. It doesn't take a genius to know the two of you have been at it since just after the prom."
Ron's hands balled up into fists, his face a mask of barely contained rage. "I…I can't believe this. First you just about tell me I'm a weak, ugly kid who doesn't deserve Kim, then you all but call me a liar to my face…yeah, we've come real close to that, but we haven't. I think I'd know pretty well if I had and let me tell you, I haven't.
"I really don't care what you say about me, Mom, but when you say things like that about Kim it hurts, hurts me really bad and not because I'm scared you might be right, but that you think so little of someone you have known just as long as I have. I love Kim. It's not buddy-love, it's not play love, it's the real deal and I know in my heart she feels the same way about me and it's not a crush, it's not a rebound and it's not just a trial run. We've talked about the future and what we want. We've talked about when we want to do things like…that and even more important things."
"Ron, you're too young to be talking about marriage."
"I know that Mom, and so do we, but that doesn't mean we can't tell each other what we want. We know we're too young for a lot of things and we've decided to put off any real decisions about that until we aren't, but we're still planning to be together for the long haul."
"But Son, have you even considered the fact you might not be together for the long haul? Yes, I do know Kim and she tends to be very flighty at times. How can you know that she won't get tired of you in a couple more months or by next year. The two of you are both going to be seniors and that means you'll be at the top of the social heap at school, but she's going to go to college after that and suddenly she's going to be a very attractive young girl around lots of older boys."
"She's not going to do that. She's better than that now."
"How do you know? Has another one of these 'hotties' shown up yet? What happens when she's got her choice of a nice looking boy who's also smart? What if he's rich? Get real…what do you have to offer her to compete with that? She's not in your league, son. Plus she's not Jewish."
The anger finally boiled over. "That's it, isn't it? It's not that I'm not good enough for her or that she's going to go after some pretty boy, it's the fact she's a Christian, isn't it. I can't believe that in this day and age people like you can be so narrow minded to think everything has to be what race, color or religion somebody is."
"Son, it does matter. She literally believes different things than you do. That's just a recipe for disaster down the road. Politics and religion can be as big a problem in relationships as money or sex."
"Mom, have you even noticed that Kim has been coming to Temple with us?"
"Yes, I've noticed that, but it's only been for you. She sits there quietly and politely because she doesn't understand what's going on, but in the end she's just putting on a show. I've also noticed you going to church with her on Sunday mornings. Does that mean one of you is converting? That's another thing I think that could be wrong. Changing your beliefs just for sex?"
"I'm not changing my beliefs, Mom! And it doesn't all boil down to just sex. Listen to me. I…love...Kim! I know she feels the same way about me and listen to yourself. You just said she goes to Temple for me. She doesn't understand half what goes on there, but she asks me about it and she's interested when I explain things to her. The same thing happens when I go to her church, though it's easier for me since they do everything in English."
He looked into her eyes. All he could see there was something that looked almost like…pity. What was there to be pitied about his love for Kim? With a low growl he stormed out of the kitchen and walked out into the hot afternoon.
Ron was too wound up to take the free shuttle to the main part of town. Instead he turned toward the beach, walking on the slightly damp sand, avoiding eye contact with any of the other beach goers. Away from the bulk of the resort hotels the beach was a lot emptier and before long he could follow the surf line easily without dodging late afternoon sunbathers.
How could she say things like that to him? Did she have so little respect for the two of them? Did It matter so much to her mother that the love of his life was a Christian?
The worst of it, however, was what if his mother was right? What if he was the 'trial-run' for Kim. Was it fear and morality that had sidetracked last night or had Kim suddenly realized she didn't want Ron? Was all that planning for the future just a way of letting him down easily?
How could he compete with other, better guys. Sure, he turned out better than that blasted Synthodrone but what did he have to offer her in the long run? He wasn't handsome, he wasn't strong and he wasn't smart. It had taken everything he had to pull himself out of the fire his Junior year, while Kim just seemed to breeze through it. What was going to happen when somebody with Josh Mankey's pretty looks and a real brain and personality showed up?
What's more, did he have any right to deny Kim that?
He puzzled over those questions as the sun sank over the western edge of the bay and the towering condo receded behind him.