A/N: Alrighties, quite short update this time. Next chapter however will be a lot longer and will also be childish as hell.
Because we're like that.
Thanks goes to Judin for giving me Norwegian curses for me to abuse. Thanks again!
- - -
Asuka looked at her watch for the fourth time and sighed deeply.
"Where the heck is King? It feels like we've been waiting for ever!"
The remainder of the re-Americanizing group sighed in unison. Bryan squirmed helplessly on the deck, not trying to escape because it wasn't polite. Jack still remained on his spot. The cool night-wind blew softly.
"I'm cold. I want to go inside." Asuka complained again. Baek rolled his eyes at her.
"Be quiet, Kazama. King will be back any minute, trust me."
No one said anything in response. Finally even Feng gave up.
"There must be some other weapons!" he groaned. "Like… a kitchen knife or… Raven!"
The group looked at each other, considering it.
"Well… Raven could work, right?" Feng asked again, hesitantly.
"No." Marduk settled it.
"Okay. Could we strangle some random by-passer?"
"That's not an all too bad idea, actually…" Marshall mumbled.
They stood silently just a while longer, enjoying the peace and the breeze. They soon heard steps. Baek grinned evilly.
"I sense a random by-passer approaching." He purred.
Around the corner came Hwoarang, chewing on a carrot. He stopped when he noticed the re-Americanizers looking at him in an unsettling, unusually interested way. He took another bite of the carrot and chewed it slowly. Feng glanced at Baek hopefully. Baek looked back, considered it for a moment and shook his head. Feng's hopeful look faded away and he looked down on deck with a disappointed 'aw'. Hwoarang looked at the crowd, including Bryan on deck.
"Um… what's going on here?"
"We're setting things straight." Marduk said proudly. Hwoarang's look darkened.
"I'm not gay, alright!" he snarled at him. Marduk shrugged.
"Whatever, from what I've heard you're going to burn anyway."
"What?"
"Never mind."
"Hwoarang…" Baek began, stroking his chin with a thoughtful look. "You don't happen to have a weapon with you, like a knife or a gun?"
Hwoarang checked his available spaces for weapons and shook his head.
"Nothing?"
"Nope, sorry."
"What about napalm?" Asuka asked before breaking out into an extremely feminine giggling fit, one that Feng soon joined into. The rest of the group settled for good old-fashioned masculine chuckling. Hwoarang gave a frustrated sigh and glared at them.
"You want napalm? Huh! Then I'll give you napalm! TOUCH MY HAIR!" he roared and began making very strange wiggling movements with his head against them. He stumbled forward while doing so. Baek gave him a very nonchalant look before he simply raised his hand and smacked the back of Hwoarang's head, hard.
"Knock it off." He told him. The re-Americanizers stared at Hwoarang a while longer, before they heard the sounds of running steps. King came around the corner.
"He's coming! Push him, push him!" he panted. Marduk turned towards Jack and once again raised his finger against his face.
"Unit!" he barked, making Jack immediately snap up. "Go swimming!"
Flash. Beep!
"INVALI…"
He never managed to finish the sentence, as Baek had just stepped forward and given him a hard push over the railing. He made a discouragingly large splash. The re-Americanizers and Hwoarang looked over the railing down at the place he had sunk. They looked for a long while.
"I don't think he's coming back up." Marshall finally stated. The captain rounded the corner.
"Alright." He sighed deeply. "What's all this about a whale?"
The group turned towards him with nervous grins on their faces.
"Um, maybe we were mistaken…" Marduk began explaining as Feng leant towards Baek.
"Can you get sent to jail for killing a robot?" he whispered. Baek leant closer towards him, too.
"I hope not, for your sake. They'd pass you around like currency."
"Trust me, they would." Hwoarang added, whispering as well.
"Pah! They could try!"
"You'd like that, huh?"
"Shut up!" Asuka hissed at them.
"…but if we see one…" Marduk continued. The captain nodded, uninterested, before something behind Marduk finally did catch his interest. He walked to the railing, pushing them aside, and leant out.
"Is that a…?" he said to himself, squinting to make something out. The re-Americanizers (and Hwoarang) turned around to check. They saw something blinking far out there.
"Is it a whale?" Marduk asked loudly with an amazingly fake, happy voice. The captain gasped.
"It is! It is!" he squealed and ran up to the harpoon. He aimed it out while giggling insanely to himself.
"En hval! En hval!" he chanted happily in Norwegian and aimed towards the blinking spot out there. Marduk raised Bryan to his feet and tore the bag off his head. He then pointed out towards it.
"Look at that, mister Politeness, and then don't you forget it!"
Bryan squinted, trying to make it out.
"Is that a fishing boat?" he asked. No one replied. The Norwegian captain cheered and fired the harpoon, sending the mighty weapon of re-Americanizing out towards its goal. It zoomed through the air and disappeared into nothing. There was a short, awkward silence before the captain suddenly broke out into hysterical, angry Norwegian cursing.
"Faen! Faen, faen, faen, faen! Faen i helvetes jvel! Jvla faen!" were some of the words the onlookers could make out among the spitting and hissing. Bryan looked a bit confused. He glanced at Marduk.
"Excuse me, I don't…"
Marduk hushed him.
"Just wait and see." He said quietly, glad that he didn't understand a word the captain was saying. Bryan looked up at the captain again and frowned slightly.
"Wait a minute, did he just say something about me?" he snarled. Marduk hushed him again. The captain quickly loaded another harpoon, aimed it out towards it goal and shot again. It hit something out there, making sparks fly up. The captain didn't care about the sparks, instead pulling it in, giggling hysterically. The re-Americanizers gave Bryan hopeful looks. Bryan stared out to sea with his mouth hanging open, tears welling up in his eyes. He then raised his hand to his face, wiping away one of the tears before staring at it.
"My… eyes seem to be leaking…" he whispered and grabbed his hair. "How could I have been so STUPID?"
He ran up to the captain and hugged the harpoon with weird, purring noises, rubbing his face against it for a while. His head then jerked up as he realized something.
"Steve wouldn't even let me bring a gun!" he snarled. The captain ignored him completely. Marduk crossed his arms and nodded happily.
"Mission accomplished." He said. The rest of the re-Americanizers gave each other high fives and random hugs. Hwoarang shrugged, puzzled.
"What the hell was that about?"
"We had to…" King began, but was interrupted by Bryan leaping down on the deck in front of them. He was breathing quickly and looking around in a worried fashion.
"I need a gun." He said. Marduk nodded slowly with a rapidly growing smile. Hwoarang stared at Bryan.
"Why do you need a gun so badly? Why would anyone need a gun that badly?"
Bryan shook his head.
"I don't have time for this! I need a weapon!" he muttered and jogged away, looking around for something suitable as a weapon. The ex-re-Americanizing group walked back inside, chatting casually amongst each other. Asuka sighed happily.
"I'm so glad we made three people out there so happy." She said. "Not to mention killed a robot!"
King gave her a worried glance.
"You're beginning to sound a lot like Ling, you know."
Asuka stopped, turned towards him and put her hands in her sides.
"Well, soooorry!" she said sarcastically.
"Aaaaaah, you tricky lady!" a very familiar voice called a bit down the hall. The ex-re-Americanizing group stared in utter chock at the sight in front of them. Asuka slowly turned around, almost afraid of what she would see. She saw Lei, so very horridly naked, with the exception of a lot of money tied around his throat with his tie. He looked very doped up and came stumbling towards them, grinning insanely at whatever it was he actually saw. Lei continued his unsteady journey towards them, still staring at Asuka.
"I see you tried to confuuuuuuuse your enemy by using the DRUNKEN PLATYPUS STANCE!" he rambled, backing up almost every word with strangely matching kung-fu-like movements. The entire group stared. Asuka glanced at Hwoarang and elbowed his side.
"Not gay." She whispered. He shook his head quickly and slapped the side of his face.
"Right. Not gay, not gay, not gay…" he chanted quietly to himself with his eyes shut tightly. Lei continued towards them after standing in the 'drunken platypus stance' for a while.
"I see you just want to dodge and avoid and, um… dodge your enemy before you hit them with a BAT!"
Immediately after the last words, he threw up his arms to make them look like wings and made funny, screeching noises while jumping towards them. Asuka backed away.
"Umm…" she hummed, looking around for an escape route. She gasped and pointed at something behind Lei.
"Look over there!" she called. Lei immediately turned back.
"Wha?"
Asuka quickly span around and sprinted down the hall, screaming slightly after a while. Lei turned around again, looking after the quickly fleeing girl. He clenched his fists and stomped the floor.
"Curses! The tricky lady tricked me! I must be cleverererer…" he said, slowly backing away with his arms stretched out in front of himself. "…like a viper!" he finally hissed before he leapt into an adjacent corridor. Unfortunately for him, it was one that Jun was currently in. She stared at him while he slowly got up on his feet. The ex-re-Americanizing group looked around the corner. Lei finally noticed Jun standing there, grinned and took a few steps against her. She gasped, took a very short and feminine step forward and downed him with one quick, painful kick. He collapsed to the floor and only managed to utter one puzzled little sound before passing out. Jun brushed some imaginary brush off her clothes and noticed the ex-re-Americanizing group. She put her hands in her sides.
"He tried to do the Drunken Master so I kicked him in the head!" she explained. King leant down next to Lei, examining his head, while Marduk stared openly at Jun.
"I don't think he did the Drunken Master, I think he was actually drunk."
"Or something." Feng added. King poked Lei's head.
"I don't think that's supposed to bleed, you know." He stated. The ex-re-Americanizing group took a closer look at him.
"Eeeeew…"
"Jun, how could you do such a thing?" Hwoarang asked, wrinkling his nose in disgust. Jun glared at him.
"What's the matter, you going FAGGOT!" she spat at him. Hwoarang gave her a surprised stare before he suddenly grinned and threw his hands up in a questioning shrug.
"Why the hell not, it's Christmas!" he exclaimed happily, quickly put his arms around Feng's neck and gave him a nice, hard kiss on the lips before he skipped away. Feng stared right in front of himself, chocked beyond words. Baek suddenly broke out into sadistic laughter.
"What's the matter, can't you handle a little luvin'?" he asked him and held his sides, laughing hysterically. Marduk glanced at Asuka.
"I thought Hwoarang came from a country where they don't celebrate Christmas."
"It doesn't matter, does it?" she asked.
"I guess not."
Feng blinked a few times before he finally wiped his mouth, spitting over his shoulder. He coughed slightly and glared at the group. And Jun.
"No one will ever know." He threatened darkly. Jun rolled her eyes.
"Whatever. I better go find Julia before she kills someone."
The people went their separate ways. Feng was the only one grumbling.