Whee: Like I said, this chapter is REALLY childish. Really, really, really childish. Be forewarned.

Reviews too, eh?

- - -

Bryan had abandoned the top hat, monocle, cane and tuxedo, only wearing the pants and the spiffy white shirt. He wiped some sweat from his brow before he leant down, took a better grip of the long metal pipe and once again attempted to pull it loose. He gritted his teeth and tried even harder, making a victorious cry as it finally came out. He gave it a critical glance and decided it would have to do. Lacking a better solution he fastened it in the belt and turned around to get back to the dining room and beat someone up, preferably Steve.

Then the floor disappeared.

- - -

Kazuya's head jerked up as he heard a noise from far back in the room, followed by a short coughing fit and curses. He got up and stretched, preparing himself for whatever may come. He sighed and rolled his eyes when he realized who it was coming towards him.

"Well, well, well…" he said, crossing his arms. "If it isn't Mr. Politeness."

Bryan glared darkly at him.

"Shut the hell up." He snarled. Kazuya gave him a quick, surprised look before he laughed.

"So you've canned the British stuff? Well, good riddance."

Bryan nodded towards the door.

"Open it." He ordered. Kazuya shrugged.

"Trust me, I've tried everything but the bastard just won't budge."

"Hmph. We'll see about that…" Bryan muttered and threw himself at it, expecting a door that would give way easily. He was very surprised when he noticed it didn't. He got back up on his feet and rubbed his arm with an extremely displeased look on his face.

"Okay… well built, this Ship."

"Isn't it?"

"Why, yes." Bryan replied with a grin. He then slapped his own face, extremely hard. "No more British shit!" he told himself sternly while rubbing his cheek.

Kazuya motioned towards the door.

"So how are we going to open this thing?" he asked.

- - -

Hwoarang walked around aimlessly, unable to find something interesting to do. He leapt back with a surprised yelp as he suddenly heard a loud bang from a nearby door, followed by muffled voices. He cautiously put his ear against it, making out the voices almost clearly.

"…British shit!"

"So how are we going to open this thing?"

- - -

"I don't really know…" Bryan mumbled, stroking his chin with a thoughtful look on his face. "How tightly shut it is, anyway?"

"I haven't been able to open it all night. I suppose that going to give us problems."

Bryan tried the handle, just to be sure. He then leant closer, looking at the crack between the door and the wall.

"Maybe we can find something to lubricate it with?" he asked.

- - -

"Oh my god!" Hwoarang whispered, grinning widely. He noticed someone walking a bit away and tried to make out who it was.

"Forest!" he hissed, motioning to him to come closer. "Get over here, you're going to LOVE this!"

Forest gave him a surprised look before he, too, put his ear against the door.

- - -

Kazuya rolled his eyes.

"I doubt we'll find anything like that in here, Fury."

"Alright… do we have anything to put in that hole here?"

"I don't think there's anything that thin that's still strong enough, and…" he paused, looking at the metal pipe in Bryan's belt. He pointed at it.

"…I can see you have something hard in your pants."

"Oh, this thing?" Bryan asked, taking a grip of the pipe. "Just something I found a while back. I thought it was going to work, so I stole it."

Kazuya grimaced.

"Look at the size of it! I bet it could kill a guy!"

"Yeah, I think it has. Look, there's actually a splotch of blood here."

He pointed at it. Kazuya looked.

"Don't you ever clean that?"

"I just got this thing, give me a break."

"Okay, okay… let's get it out of there." Kazuya said, attempting to pull it out. Bryan stopped him.

"Hey, hey, be careful with that! It might rip my pants!"

"Fine…" Kazuya said, letting it go. "It's too big for that hole anyway. Let's find something smaller to use in there."

- - -

Hwoarang and Forest stared in surprise at each other.

"Are they doing what I think they're doing?" Forest whispered.

"I think so."

They looked to the side, where Jin was walking by. They motioned to him to come closer. He hesitated slightly.

"Oh come on Jin, you're not going to believe this!"

Jin shrugged, walked over there and put his ear against the door, ready for almost anything.

- - -

"Here we go, a toolbox!" Bryan exclaimed happily and carried it out to the door. He opened it and rummaged through it.

"How about a hammer?"

"I doubt that'll work, it's not meant for it."

Bryan kept looking, digging through the various tools.

"Aha! A screwdriver!"

"Yeah, it could work. Okay, just shove it in there."

"In here?"

"Yeah, in that very hole there."

"Alright…"

Bryan carefully pushed the screwdriver into a hole in the crack between the door and the wall. He jerked it around, hoping to hear some positive sound. Kazuya put is ear against the door, listening for something pointing towards it opening.

"Do you feel anything?" Bryan asked.

"No, keep doing that, I think it will work eventually."

Bryan pulled the screwdriver out and peeked into the hole, trying to see something.

"Is that rust…?" he asked in disbelief. "I thought this was supposed to be high-tech!"

"Stop complaining and get the screwdriver back in there."

They continued working the door together. Bryan finally stopped with a frustrated sigh.

"Harder?" he asked. Kazuya shrugged.

"Yeah, maybe."

He jerked it around violently before pulling it out again and throwing it carelessly over his shoulder.

"I think the hole might be big enough for my own tool now." He stated almost proudly, pulling the metal pipe from his belt. He carefully fitted it into the hole in the crack and turned to Kazuya.

"Okay, I work this thing and you just push."

Kazuya nodded and began to throw himself against the door while Bryan tried to bend it open, using the pipe. Kazuya grunted loudly every time he hit the door. Suddenly the iron pipe broke with a loud, metallic sound, causing Bryan to fall to the floor. He stared at the broken off piece in his hand in surprise.

"It broke!" he gasped.

"You broke it! Where is the other half, is it stuck in there?"

"I don't think so." Bryan said, pulling the other half out of the door. "Nope, I got it. Now I have to get a new tool."

"I don't think that worked anyway."

"Oh, so that didn't work for you, huh? What do you suggest we do then?"

"Well…"

- - -

Hwoarang and Forest backed away from the door, covering their mouths to keep themselves from giggling wildly. Jin remained by the door, looking chocked beyond mortal understanding. He finally blinked, closed his mouth and shuddered in disgust. With feeling. An extremely so.

"Hey Jin?" Hwoarang laughed. "Wasn't that your dad in there?"

Jin shuddered. With feeling!

"Yes…" he managed to say. A Scotsman, carrying another tool box, elbowed his way past Hwoarang and Forest. Forest glanced at him.

"Oh, hi Seamus. How's Fergus?"

"Aye, Fergus be just fine there, laddie…" the Scotsman replied while pulling a card through the card reader. "'e'll be better once he spits all that bleach out, though."

Forest frowned slightly.

"Why would someone put bleach in a Jacuzzi?"

Seamus sighed slightly and turned towards Forest.

"Well, let me tell ya like this, laddie… how did you think that Chaolan dyed his hair?"

The three men gave each other surprised glances and shuddered violently.

"Does he get in there naked?" Hwoarang asked. Seamus closed his eyes with an uncomfortable grunt.

"Some thing I donnae wanna know, laddie." He said darkly. He hit the code and opened the door, gasping in surprise as to what was within. Kazuya, holding Bryan's neck and the waistband of his pants, holding him partially lifted. Kazuya and Bryan stared in surprise at the audience.

"Dad!" Jin hissed, pulling his hair with a completely devastated look on his face. Kazuya dropped Bryan without a second thought and lifted his hands to fend off any attacks.

"Hey, I was just trying to bang him against the door!" he explained.

"And he means that in the least homosexual way possible!" Bryan added. Hwoarang and Forest finally broke out into hysterical laughter. The Scotsman just shook his head slowly and forced his way past them into the machine room. Jin suddenly sobbed and shook his head slowly.

"I never imagined this about you, dad! You, of all people!"

Kazuya frowned.

"What? You cared about me?"

"I might freaking hate you, but now I've lost all my respect for you, too!"

Hwoarang and Forest leaned against each other, still laughing wildly. Jin crossed his arms and turned away, his eyes falling at Asuka.

"Oh no…" he whispered. Asuka looked at the small crowd and giggled.

"Bryan and Kazuya," she began to sing. "Alone in a room! F-U-C-…"

"STOP! Just stop!" Jin interrupted her, rubbing his temples. More people came out from seemingly nowhere, all beginning to discuss the events with a certain amount of glee. Steve appeared and looked over Marshall's shoulder. He gasped.

"So Bryan really is gay? I had a sneaking suspicion…"

Marshall looked over his shoulder at him.

"I thought you did this!"

"Me? Oh, no, no, a hundred kinds of no! That one hundred percent Bryan, okay!"

He was suddenly raised high into the air. He was flipped upside down by Marduk, glaring angrily at him.

"Look what you have done!" he roared, turning him against Bryan and Kazuya, still in the doorway to the machine room. "You have with your sissy British ways turned Bryan into a no good fruit, who is now going to burn for his homosexual sins!"

"What about the hundreds of people he has brutally slaughtered?" Raven asked, one eyebrow arched.

"Well, of course he's… hey, where did he go?"

Steve shrugged. It looked weird when he was upside down. Bruce joined the crowd, smiling sadly.

"Hey guys, what's going…" he began, but noticed the 'couple' in the doorway. He stared at them, then at the smiling faces, and the situation played itself out in his head. His left eyelid suddenly twitched. He patted Julia's shoulder.

"Got any pepper-spray?" he asked. She nodded, dug into her pocket and gave him a bottle of it.

"Thank you." He whispered and accepted it. He then forced his eyes wide open and gave them both a good spray. He blinked slightly a while afterwards.

"Much better." He purred, put his hands over his eyes and cried out in extreme pain. He ran away, clawing at his face, of course smearing his make-up in the process. Baek came strolling by, stopped and looked over the crowd. He looked at Bryan and Kazuya, then at Hwoarang and Forest, back to the fist two again, Hwoarang and finally glanced slightly at Feng. He smirked, licked the tip of his finger and raised it into the air with a thoughtful humming.

"Wow…" he said, grinning evilly. "You can actually FEEL the gayness in the air here!"

"Listen, everyone!" Kazuya called, bringing everyone's attention to him. "I am not gay! I'm straight as an arrow! I don't know about Fury here and I don't care either!"

"Ditto!" Bryan added.

"The point is, we did not have sex in this room! I was hiding from someone and he fell through the roof! We then tried to get out! That's it! Whatever my son might say is a lie! A lie, damn it!"

He breathed quickly after his outburst. Jun managed to get a good look at the situation from the back. She scoffed at it.

"It's not a very big surprise…" she muttered, crossing her arms.

"NOOOOOO!" someone screamed out a bit away. Everyone looked at that direction. Paul stood there, pulling his hair (which actually looked very interesting) in devastation.

"It can't be true!" he whined, sobbing in between some words. "I missed the all male orgy!"

"For god's sake, we did NOT have sex!" Bryan roared. "I'm not gay!"

"Neither am I, I have proof!" Kazuya added and pointed at Jin, who refused to look. Baek seemed to realize something.

"Has someone told Heihachi about this?" Baek asked loudly. No one replied. The evil grin returned to his face. "No one? Good…"

He then strolled off, slowly, still grinning. Kazuya realized what was going on too late.

"Baek, NO!" he called, trying to stop him.

"HEY!" Baek shouted. "HEY, HEIHACHI! YOUR SON'S GAY!"

Heihachi turned his head against him with a gasp.

"What? Lee!" he asked, looking at his adopted son, who had fallen asleep on the table already. Baek rolled his eyes.

"No, I mean your real son."

Heihachi stared blankly in front of himself, not a muscle moving in his face. Baek stepped up to him, looking closer at him.

"Heihachi?" he asked and snapped his fingers in front of his face. Heihachi seemed to wake up again.

"Well, I'm not surprised." He scoffed. "Lee has always been a little, you know…"

"No, I not talking about Lee!" Baek hissed. "I mean your real son, Mishima Kazuya, is gay!"

Heihachi stared blankly at him again before a huge grin broke out on his face. He laughed nervously.

"Oh, you almost got me there. Trying to fool me into thinking my son is a fruit, that's a good one!"

"Heihachi, I'm serious."

The grin died out almost immediately as he stretched up, grabbed Baek's collar and pulled him down close to his face.

"Now you listen to me you little punk! My son is not gay! And… furthermore…"

Heihachi let go of Baek again, breathing heavily. He then slowly got up and looked around.

"Where is… the men's room?" he whispered. Baek pointed him in the right direction, watching him run off with a frown. He met Kazuya's eyes over the room. Kazuya glared. Intensively.

"Um, Kazuya…?" Bryan said. "Your, uh… your eye is glowing."

"Hm?" Kazuya mumbled, snapping back to reality. "Oh! Oh, yeah, it does that sometimes. Don't mind it." He explained and slapped the side of his head.

"Is it gone now?"

"Er… yes."

"Ah, good! Problem solved."

Everyone turned around at the sound of breaking glass. What appeared to be a huge pile of seaweed suddenly came crashing in through a window, landing with a wet thump on the floor. After a short, embarrassing moment, a green sword stuck out of it, closely followed by a wildly grinning Yoshimitsu.

"Myyy eyes are funny too!" he cried, stumbling towards the crowd. "And it hurts when you poke them!"

Christie stopped him and quickly shoved a finger into his eye socket.

"No, it… OW!" she cried out and quickly pulled her finger back out. She stared at it and shook her hand.

"Daymn!"

Marduk gasped, ran up to them and grabbed Yoshimitsu's shoulders.

"You must be one of those poltergeists! Have no fear, my dead child! Pass into the light and the Great One shall greet you there!" he called out, shaking Yoshimitsu as he did so. Yoshimitsu gave him a confused look, before he grinned again.

"Okay!" he said and giggled. "I'll pass into the light! I really will!"

He then broke free from Marduk's grip and stumbled away, still giggling. Marduk looked after him.

"That's it, child! Embrace the holy light!"

Kazuya and Bryan glanced at each other.

"I don't think anyone believes us." Kazuya stated. Bryan sighed.

"No. I guess I'll have to prove my statement." Bryan said, cleared his throat and called out:

"Is Anna here?"

A hand was raised in the back, chained to another one. Bryan didn't comment this.

"Good! You busy!"

"No!" she called back.

"Great! Meet me by the men's room in two minutes!"

Kazuya patted his shoulder.

"When you're done with her I'm going to need to use her for a while."

"Ah, just give me five minut… ten! Fifteen!"

He paused for a short while. Kazuya didn't say anything.

"Thirty." Bryan finally concluded. Anna forced her way to the front of them, looking at them both. Nina had to follow, she looked strangely flustered.

"Ah, I'll take you both at once!" Anna promised. Bryan and Kazuya stared at her, glanced at each other and shrugged simultaneously.

"Whatever." Bryan said, took her hand and simply tore the handcuff apart, freeing Anna and Nina from each other. Anna then put her arms around Bryan and Kazuya's shoulders, allowing herself to be led away. The crowd dispersed, everyone going to do something better with their time. Feng, for example, got some punch, still humming the Mission Impossible theme to himself. Baek walked up to him.

"I'd be careful with that if I were you, we could get sued."

"What?"

"Never mind. Are you sure you don't want to go with them?"

"Who?"

"Fury, Kazuya and Anna. Maybe you need to prove your heterosexuality by running off with a woman and two men, huh?" he said before walking away giggling. Feng groaned loudly.

"Hey!" he called after him. "It was Hwoarang who kissed ME, okay!"

The people in the room stopped whatever they were doing and stared at him in surprise. He realized he had just said that out loud. In the other end of the room, Paul cursed silently to himself.

"Damn, I missed that thing too!" He snarled. Feng scratched the back of his head and laughed in a very nervous manner.

"Well, you see…" he began, trying to explain the situation to the crowd. "Tha… that was a joke, okay? That never really happened."

There was such pure silence you could have heard a cricket take a dump.

"Oh, screw you all." Feng shouted, gulped the punch down and turned around to get some more. He then walked over to an unused pool table, leaning against it while he tried to fight down the blushing.

"So the redhead gave you a smoochie, huh?" someone giggled behind him. He sighed, turned around and glared darkly at Nina.

"He surprised me! He began rambling about Krisst-muss."

"What, Christmas?"

"Yeah, that's right."

"Oh…kay."

Feng gulped down his punch again and sighed miserably.

"You know…" he began. "All my life everyone around me has always been sure of two things. One, that I can kick their ass, and two, that I'm sure as hell not gay. And now people are just sure of one thing."

He sighed again and sobbed quietly.

"I never should've left the dojo." He moaned. Nina didn't reply, instead she quickly ran around the table and threw her arms around his neck.

"You… are… perfect!" she breathed in his ear before leaning back from him, admiring him. "You've got a wonderful physique, you've got self-esteem, that hard-ass attitude and you're not afraid to show your feelings! The only downside is your weird taste in clothing, of course. Now if you're well equipped, you're every woman's dream!"

Feng looked from side to side, pondering the situation.

"Yes…?" he said hesitantly. She stared at his face for a long while, before she grinned almost evilly.

"Marry me, bitch!" she hissed at him. He got a strange, apathic look in his eyes as he shrugged.

"Whatever." He replied. She immediately gave him a passionate kiss, pressing herself close to him. He lifted her up on the pool table, ignoring everyone's curious looks as he got up and reclaimed her mouth hungrily. People lost interest and began chatting with each other again, ignoring the moans from the pool table. The janitor, who was in the other side of the room, caught side of them and gasped in horror. He ran over there and stared at them.

"NO! And sweat that is so damn hard to get out!" he growled, walked to the side of the pool table, stuck his hands under Nina's back and simply flipped the couple off the table. They landed with a loud thump on the very hard floor.

"I think I broke something!" Feng whined. After a short silence, Nina sighed deeply. The janitor ignored them and instead began to rip the carpeting off the table. Lee woke up a few tables away and caught sight of him.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" he gasped.

"Saving your property, sir!" the janitor replied and ripped it clean off. "This will get to a dry-cleaner the moment were back on land!"

"Ah." Lee said, letting his head fall down on the table again. He raised it almost immediately afterwards. "Wait a minute, I thought you didn't speak English! Or any Oriental language either, for that matter!"

The janitor looked nervously from side to side.

"I don't." he replied. "You're speaking Spanish."

Lee blinked, puzzled.

"Que?" he asked.