'Dammit!' Caitlin sank back on the tiled floor and rubbed her hand over her face, the urge to have a good cry was very tempting. Morning sickness, hah! She thought angrily. It was evening for crying out loud! She wished Hawke were with her but he'd gone to walk Tet. She took a deep breath and hurriedly leaned over the toilet as another wave of nausea hit. She was trembling when she finally got to her feet. She cleaned up and wandered to the sink to brush her teeth, rinse her mouth out. A sound at the doorway turned her head as she replaced the toothbrush back in its holder.

Hawke hovered in the open door. 'You OK?'

She nodded and then with horror burst into tears. She covered her face with her hands and a split second later was being held tightly against her husband.

Hawke held on helplessly smoothing a hand over her back as she burrowed against him weeping. It was probably hormones, he thought trying not to panic. He let Caitlin cry herself out before he led her back to the bedroom and ushered her into bed. When he returned with some hot chocolate for her to drink, she was fast asleep. He sighed and brushed her fringe out of her eyes before he wandered back down the stairs.

Five minutes later, Hawke threw his book down, his fingers tapped impatiently on the arm of his chair. Something was bothering her, he thought. She'd been too quiet since the HX-2 mission had finished a couple of days ago. Even getting Dom released from the hospital earlier hadn't raised her spirits or Michael's update that Kendry was being reassigned by the airforce and the guy who'd come after them, Merrick, was history; the FIRM didn't believe in reassignment.

Hawke rubbed his chin. It wasn't like Caitlin to keep things bottled up and whatever was bothering her was obviously upsetting her if the crying jag was anything to go by. He frowned. She needed the rest but in the morning, they were going to talk.

When Hawke woke the next morning he was alone in the bed. He showered, dressed and found his wife out on the porch bench wrapped in a blanket sipping a hot drink from an oversize mug. He almost smiled. Sitting on the bench, sharing coffee and the start of the day was almost a ritual with them. Hawke sat down next to her and was pleased when she cuddled into his side. He pinched the mug from her and took a sip before she could say anything. He almost choked and his face screwed up at the bitter taste. He stared at the liquid and then at his wife's amused face.

'What the hell is this?' He asked.

'Herbal tea.' Caitlin took the mug back off him. 'I'm supposed to be cutting down on my coffee, remember?'

'Right.' Hawke caught the unhappy undertone. 'You want to talk about it?'

'What?'

'Whatever's been bothering you the last couple of days.'

Caitlin's eyes shot to his before skidding away. 'It's nothing.'

Hawke set the mug down on the ground and shifted them until they faced each other trying to ignore the churning in his own stomach that was telling him to leave it alone. He nudged her chin up until she was looking at him. He braced himself. 'Talk to me, Cait.'

Caitlin looked into his eyes for a long moment before she sighed. 'I've been thinking you were right.' She lifted and dropped a shoulder in resignation. 'I shouldn't have gotten involved with the HX-2 mission.'

It was the last thing he expected to hear. Hawke raised an eyebrow. 'I'm not sure I understand.'

'When Dom got shot, I was stood right next to him.' Caitlin swallowed. 'If the bullet had missed him by just a couple of inches...if I'd been shot I could have lost the baby.'

His heart skipped at her guilt-ridden expression and his hand tightened on hers. 'Hey, that didn't happen.'

'Yeah, through sheer luck.' She drew a shaky breath fighting off another crying bout. 'I guess I'm off the Airwolf crew.' Her unhappiness gleamed in her tearful eyes.

Hawke felt adrift, uncertain what to say. He couldn't deny he was pleased. 'I know that's a hard choice for you to make…'

'No you don't.' Caitlin cut in. She gestured at him impatiently. 'You don't get your life completely turned upside down because I'm pregnant. You're not the one who has to give up stunt work or flying Airwolf or the one throwing up every day or having to drink herbal tea,' she pointed at the offending drink, 'and my body doesn't feel like my body anymore.' Frustration and resentment laced her words.

Hawke felt the panic rising in him and gripped her hand a little tighter. 'So are you saying,' he hesitated, 'are you saying you don't want the…'

'No!' Caitlin denied vehemently, 'no!' She laid a hand against his jaw and held his gaze. 'I want our baby.'

The certainty in her eyes calmed the sudden irrational fear that had grabbed him by the throat. 'So…'

'So,' she gave a rueful smile, 'I guess the baby has me a little freaked out.' She bit her lip. 'I just didn't realise there would be so many changes and so soon…it's all kinda overwhelming.'

Hawke gave a small sigh and pulled her into his lap to kiss her. 'I'm sorry.'

'What for?' Caitlin gave a small laugh.

'You should have said something.' Hawke muttered.

'I know.' Caitlin ran a finger down his jaw, fiddled with his collar. 'I just…I feel like I'm not even through my first trimester and already I'm an awful Mom.'

'Cait…' Hawke chided her, 'you're going to be a great mother.'

'You think?'

'I know.' Hawke kissed her again happy to see the spark coming back into her eyes.

They sat silently for a while watching the lake and cuddling.

'I guess we should head out to the airfield.' Caitlin said. 'Dom'll be wondering where we are.'

Hawke made no effort to move. 'We're not exactly busy.' Dom was still trying to re-establish the work that had been cancelled in anticipation of the HX-2 mission.

'True.' Caitlin snuggled into him.

'Actually,' Hawke said an idea forming, 'you could take some time off and go to Texas, see your folks.'

Caitlin was about to dismiss the idea when she hesitated. If she went to Texas, she could spend some time with her own mother and her sister, Erin. There were questions she had that only another woman who'd had a baby would probably be able to answer, fears that they might be able to put to rest. 'You wouldn't mind?'

Hawke shook his head.

'You could come with me.' Caitlin suggested.

'I would but with Dom having a busted arm…he'll need help.' Hawke pointed out. 'I'll miss you though.'

'You'd better.' Caitlin said with a laugh and patted his chest. 'OK then. I'll call my parents.'

'Tell you one thing I won't miss.' Hawke commented.

'What?'

His blue eyes twinkled at her. 'That herbal tea.'

She was laughing when he kissed her.