Title: Only Me Now
Author: Jinhito
Summary: He wasn't Sasuke... Naruto kept repeating it over and over to himself. He wasn't Sasuke... couldn't be Sasuke... but he wanted him to be so badly...
Author's Note: I wrote this sometime last week in my writing notebook during a biology lecture. It's seemed interesting enough at the time and I figure the world needs more Sai.
Disclaimer: Own nothing except my deluded yaoi-filled mind.

"I know all about you Naruto-kun." he'd added the suffix in a condescending tone. There was always something to suspect about Sai. Now Naruto was sure he had been discreetly plotting all along. Pride just kept him from admitting he was unnerved by this sudden change of behavior. But he couldn't move to say he was entirely right, who was there to prove it to?

He almost preferred hearing the tactless jokes about his genitalia... almost.

So he put an old front in the face of opposition.

"Isn't that grounds for stalking someone?" A feeble smile reached his lips. Damn that Yamato man for leaving them alone together in the bathes unsupervised!

Sai chuckled darkly, his constant apathetic smile in place as well. Usual yet at the same time unexpected of his priss 'n prim personality. He sounded vaguely like the dastardly villain about to tie the heroine to the train tracks.

"You have no idea..." he played along, accepting the role he'd just been assigned.

The ripples in the water were the only tip off Naruto had previous to Sai's lightening-quick movements. He certainly hadn't expected the other to close in on him so fast... and quite literally too.

His brain screamed that it was time to panic; adrenaline hit the freak-out button.

"Wha-what are ya' doin' ya' bastard? Get - get off!" his voice cracked during his violent endeavors to esacpe. Arms wound past the pale boy's own, palms landing flat on an ANBU's toned chest.

Naruto's eyes gave away his fear when he realized it was useless. Sai was the better tactician... there had to be a strategy behind it somehow, he wasn't an ANBU for nothing. Realizing brute strength would get him nowhere in a fight where his angry flailing could be used against him, Naruto gave up to stare back into cool, crisp collected eyes.

So dark... so black... devoid of everything he knew eyes should hold.

'Sasuke.'

The thought was fleeting. He wished he hadn't even thought it in the first place. Sai hadn't blinked once since pinning the younger boy beneath him; he was too preoccupied with reading every emotion on display of that bright round face.

The soft careless smile left him. Only a stoic expression replaced the emptiness Sai felt.

Naruto shut his eyes before he felt the other boy crush their lips together fiercely. It was painful and un-enjoyable for both parties... more animalistic in need than anything else.

'No.'

The struggling started up again. Sai groaned exasperated into the kiss he had started, slamming his body heavily into Naruto's equally wiry frame in an attempt to get it to behave. The weight of the dark-haired boy seemed to work well enough; no was not an answer… defiance was for the stupid.

"Why do you bother?" was whispered against his lips. Naruto tried to fight down the shameful flush... this was embarrassing… a future Hokage being molested so openly in a cheap bathhouse during a mission to retrieve his long lost friend…

Naruto shuddered at the foreign sensations those thoughts evoked. His body was so responsive to the touch but his mind was trying it's damnedest to deny it. 'Bastard!' He was letting Sai know far too much for his own good.

"Remembering yet? I know all about you... your past, the present..." a long pause followed with a sweet kiss to his ravaged lips. A caress of wetness drew across the tight line separating them from another more passionate open-mouthed kiss. "... your wants - everything you've ever desired..."

Naruto still refused to open his eyes, there was sharp smell of a jutsu's smoke in the air… and it told him all he needed to know.

'Sasuke?'

"Naruto." A deeper, huskier voice caused a convulsion of shivers to race up and down his spine.

'No... anything but that... please! Please don't!'

He told himself he wouldn't open his eyes, promised himself he wouldn't give in. Temptation couldn't possibly be that strong, he would never -

"Naruto?" it came again, a little closer now.

"Why won't you look at me... dobe."

He gave in.

A crack of light flooded his senses and all he saw was pale ivory with a splash of rich ebony. A strangled noise escaped his throat, and somewhere along the line he thought it might have been a long overdue sob. Heart wrenching and dry... the kind that hurt to cough up.

"Sa-sasuke...?" he meekly offered the face a name; both eyes wide to take that one forbidden glance. One slip up was all it took. Naruto was too far-gone to go back now. He was beautiful... features more angular, innocence no longer playing pretend since the three year absence. A haunted look, same pitch-black irises, body more developed than the thirteen year olds he vaguely recalled.

"Sasuke."

Cerulean eyes lost in astonishment, wide in horror... full of something that made his heart ache. All over again...

"You... you're... what are you..."

A smirk he had missed so much, spent lonely nights dreaming about, even admitted to openly missing last week appeared on that godly face.

"Shut up usuratonkachi." He lurched forward again to brush their lips past one another. Tease - he was teasing. He was enjoying this...

"I know everything." that same old pompous and purely arrogant tone of voice.

"Sa-sasuke..."

'Oh God help me.' Naruto gave up lying to himself.

Sasuke emitted a low chuckle sounding peculiarly like a possessive growl, completely savoring every moment he could torture the boy into. Raw feeling was exposed too openly on the blonde's responsive face.

"You were always far too generous." Emotions and other things... A warm hand slid up a slippery thigh under the hot waters of the bath. Tender touches so uncharacteristic of his person drew away from the incredulous and dragged Naruto into the reality of now. He stared helplessly in return; leave it to the Uchiha to wash away his wittiest retorts at a time like this.

"Ha-ahn!" He'd opened his mouth to protest something, anything but found he suddenly couldn't when that same delicate hand, stroking him lovingly moments before, switched to get a firm grasp on a more sensitive piece of flesh. Naruto moaned under the solid dark body, submitting with little resistance. He was real - this was real.

"When did you become so easy?" Sasuke hunched forward to coo naughty things into his burning ears. "Do you do this with anyone who'll reach out and offer a little sympathy? Some fake companionship for a single night?" he scoffed at the thought but continued anyway. "Nothing but a quick lay to satiate that unresolved lust... how long has it been since you jerked off to me?" There was so much conviction in the knowledge that it was true.

Naruto only whimpered in return, bucking up into the generous ministrations the Uchiha was providing. Nothing he'd ever done to himself could compare to this. The sensations he was causing, the rush of feelings he'd thought he'd buried so long ago... Naruto had sworn after the first time of unfulfilled touching he'd never masturbate to the handsome face before him ever again.

It had left him feeling empty inside, nothing like he'd hoped for... worthless and filthy. No matter how many showers he'd taken after the incident that night, he never felt clean.

"Do you know what I'm gonna do to you?" The topic had changed unexpectedly, when had he stopped paying attention? There was no room left to question in the voice, Sasuke always liked commanding him. Calm features studied a flushed and dazed shinobi. He gave a moment to allow Naruto a chance to answer. No more words except the occasional moan in relished pleasure. Nothing for his kindness... he'd let it slip this time; forgiveness was often overlooked.

"Well let me tell you then."

Sinful hands palmed along the surface of a taunt body, Sasuke had him entirely in his control. "I want to use you..." that earned a groan. What a sadist-appreciating bastard.

"I'm gonna fuck with you... maybe even fuck you if you beg prettily enough." He watched the momentary expressions fluster over the blonde's face. Something akin to shock, lust and the long desired gratification those words promised. A grin broke up the haze between them. Naruto would beg alright... more wanton and heady than he already was by now.

"And then..." Sasuke led up to the moment of suspense, his hands slowing in the process. A disapproving noise echoed off the bath's thin walls. He leaned closer, lowered his already hushed voice, giving way to the last big secret he had to share.

"I'm gonna leave you..."

Naruto eyes widened when understanding made it's way to his already over stimulated mind. Any pleasure he'd been feeling prior to that moment was now gone, drowned in the torrent of painful unwanted memories.

Again?

He'd thought he'd gotten over it. Chalked it up to their brutal solitary natures... once a loner, always a loner. Forgiven and forgotten... moved on by now.

Sasuke was reopening old wounds, bleeding fresh new scars left behind from the scabs. Naruto suddenly didn't want his touches, his kisses. He no longer craved that attention he'd spent so many lonely nights secretly wishing for in the dark.

"D-don't... don't touch me..." it came out a harsh whisper, sounding nothing at all like his own voice. He dimly wondered if someone else could hear them. The bastard above him broke out into a harsh bark of a laugh. Everything in this moment was too much to handle. This boy had thought he'd been loved, still believed in love of all things! And at this age...

"You're not Sasuke..." Forceful hands pushed against the unmoving dead weight. Fighting was no longer an option; this had escalated into war.

"YOU'RE NOT SASUKE!"

Naruto dug deep for a burst of power to shove back the larger man. Dark eyes shut before he allowed the blonde momentary relief of his absence. Sasuke flew back into the water, a loud slap breaking off the skin of his back. He didn't have to see to know Naruto had launched himself out of the steaming waters... had grabbed a towel in his haste, wrapped it sloppily about his waist and headed straight for his room.

He had stormed off, possibly shoving others out of the way rudely in his confusion. Yes, today's goal had been achieved. Naruto couldn't tell the difference between fantasy and reality. He had just succeeded in blurring the boundary... and it was so sweet to fuck with that delicate mind.

Sai released the jutsu and peeked up from under the water.

He'd been right. Had done his homework expertly as was to be expected of someone in his league. The broody Uchiha from the past did mean more to the blonde than he'd previously been lead to believe. Something was left there, and it wasn't quite resolved yet.

"Oh Naruto... the things I'll do to you..." Unspoken promises within malicious eyes now glazed over in deep contemplation.

"Just what happened between you two?"

It was an unbidden curiosity, something that someone with no allowed feelings should be questioning.

No matter how many witness accounts he'd read, or how many people he'd asked around, nobody knew the answers. Sasuke was still missing and Naruto wasn't talking.

It was story that was never meant to be told... ever.

Sai smiled a genuine smile in the fading sunset. This was just too much fun.

Reviews are appreciated but not necessary… unless you want to see more?