Hogwarts Idol
By: hedwigmail
A/N: Okay I am starting to write this chapter the day after I have posted the 2nd chapter... less than a day after it. And so far, I have a total of 14 reviews! You didn't get it? 14 reviews less than 24 hours after I have posted the chapter and every one of them said how much they liked the story! I love this website! Not really... ok I like the website and I love my reviewers (but don't worry it's an open relationship, you can date other people!) Anyway, I'm gonna get to writing the next chapter now! Thank You so much you guys! You've got me so pumped and hyper!
Previously on HI:
Okay, Ron's was understandable, as he was probably really confused as how Hermione could have turned into that girl that he saw on the train.
But What was up with Draco?
Third Person:
What Hermione was missing was, well input on the average teenage boy's brain (A/N: Just Kidding bout that... hehe sorry if you a boy). Draco's thought process at the moment was something along the lines of 'how did that girl turn into Mudblood Granger by taking off some makeup, changing clothes and using a different hair style?'
And then his mind skipped to 'PUT THE MAKEUP BACK ON! Looking at Granger burns my eyes!'
Chapter III: The Heads' Commons
First Person (Hermione):
After the second tidal wave of uproar and shock; which took another half hour (merlin, why am I timing this?); I undid the spells and sat down across the table from Harry and Ron.
"So... what's new?" I asked them.
"Um... you mean other than you looking like a hooker?" Harry asked.
"Hey... I resent that..." I replied. Ow. That was uncalled for...
"Okay, just kidding... so when did this happen?"
"Oh, you know tired of my parents, tired of school... and tired of me. The stereotypical me." Wait. Someone's hand is on my leg... ok this is wrong. Here are the people around me: Seamus, Neville, Harry, Ron and Ginny. This is starting to get a little weird...
"May I have everyone's attention once more?" Professor Dumbledore announced. "It is now time for the sorting to begin."
Filch brought in the three legged stool and Professer McGonnagall walked between the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff table up to the front of the hall and stopped short of the teacher's table.
Wow. Okay that scared me. The Sorting hat wasn't there and then it was like "pop" and it was there. Ok is this ironic or what?A witch (moi) scared of magic. Sounds like something from scary movie, huh? Or maybe Not Another Teen Movie... (A/N: No? Oh, Well I tried.)
Then the Sorting Hat ripped himself a new one... mouth, that is. And started his song.
"When I was just a simple hat,
And there were no school founders.
I lived up on the shelf,
In a store called Olivanders."
Okay that's just plain weird. I knew that guy was old but that old? That was in, like, the stone age! Did they even have the wheel then?
"Then one day the owner pulled me down,
And gave me to a man.
He told him to use me wisely,
And to do the best he can."
I think the sorting hat is slacking now. Since when did it have such minimal creativity that we let it get by with a rhyme like man and can. A preschooler could do that. No, wait. Worse. Ron could do that.
"Wow, that hat gets better every year..." Ron whispered.
So Ron's really easily impressed.
"But back I went on a shelf,
For another 20 years.
Until one day I was taken down,
By Gryffindor and his peers."
Now it's stepping up to the plate. Telling us something we already knew! It was Gryffindor's idea! Wow, does it get any better... note the sarcasm.
"They threw some brains in me,
And told me how to score.
Then they left me with the kids,
So I could learn some more."
Whoa. Is it just me or did the sorting hat just say "And told me how to score." That is wrong. The little perv... Oh, now I get it... But still the part about the kids... Gross... Michael Jackson in training (A/N: Sorry if you think MJ is innocent... but it's just about the only analogy that works right now so, sorry!)
"That was when I found out,
The terrible, sad truth.
The houses were strongly devided,
And it was spoiling their youth."
Well it backed itself into a corner there. Because there's just a truckload of things that rhyme with 'truth'.
Okay so there probably are but I don't really care enough to think about it.
"Throughout the group of Gryffindor's,
They were all happy and brave.
But when it came to those Slytherins,
They could never behave."
Behave like how? Like, 'oh, those Slytherins are super hott'? Or like 'Those Slytherin's seriously piss me off. Walking around like their the kings of the damn world...' Probably the first one, based on expierience. No BAD MIA!
"All those happy Hufflepuffs,
Hardly ever got in a fight.
And even when they're overshadowed,
They work with all their might."
You know, I'm probably the only one thinking during this whole song. Every one elses brain's on free time when they can be imagining who they want to date this year or in Lavendar and Parvarti's case, who they're gonna date today.
Well I guess now would be a good time to see what my brain's been up to lately.
"That crowd of rowdy Ravenclaws,
Always smart and quiet.
But they got a temper when,
a another smart student's grades became a hit."
Wow, it's empty in here. Echo! Echo... echo... echo... echo... Okay I get the point... echo... echo... echo... So it's a bit empty, stop it... echo... echo... echo... SHUT UP!
There I got it.
Echo.
Ah! What the hell!
"But that batch of sly Slytherins,
They took the cake.
They could make the bravest student's,
Knees begin to shake."
Aha! There's my brain.
That's strange I don't remember it being a peanut... Then again when was the last time I was up here? Last year? Oh, well things happen over a summer.
"I decided then that this must change,
And though it hasn't yet.
I pray that this year,
It will seem like you have just met."
There's the thought section.
Okay, SORTING TIME!
Junk, junk, junk, junk, Bill, junk, junk, Bill, junk, junk, Bill... hm... why have I been thinking about Ron's brother so much? Oh, yeah that's why... he's hot.
Back to sorting.
Junk, junk, school, junk, junk, Ron talking to me A.K.A. junk, junk, junk, Draco Malfoy, junk, junk, spam, hott Slytherin god and junk.
Wow, that was pretty simple... but for some reason it reminded me of mail...
"So keep in mind through this year,
While you study and play.
That the future of this world,
Rests in you hands, so cease the day!"
The hall was silent as though it couldn't believe that that was the new song.
"Aw, you guys SUCK!" yelled the sorting hat, and it became motionless.
That made the hall applaude for it.
You know what? I think I gave this hat a little less credit than it deserved. Sure it's a stupid, beat up, raggedy, illiterate, dumb, retarded piece of shit but... you know what? I've changed my mind. Maybe I gave it too much credit.
The teacher's all looked rather shocked, except for the new/old Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, as the Teacher was Reamus Lupin and he had used far worse language in his day.
Professor McGonnagall regained her composure and stepped up to the front of the hall.
"Okay," McGonnagall said to the excited little munchkins that the school calls first years.
God, they're short. I'm sure I was never that short. How do I know? I distinctly remember reaching up and putting a hat on the top of my head and their little arms would never be able to reach up there.
(A/N: lol. A little exert from the Charlie and the Chocolate factory movie. Go see it if you haven't already. It's so cute! I've seen it twice. Now, back to the story.)
"Adams, Elizabeth," McGonnagall announced.
"Freely, Ineida Paula."
I leaned across the table. "Did you guys hear that?" I asked.
"Huh?" Ron replied.
"That girls intials are I. P. Freely."
"Oh my god!" Ginny said.
Harry and Ron silmultaneously snorted. Weird.
"Hertz, Dick."
"Dick Hertz." Ron whispered. Everyone sniggered.
"Zeda, Buttercup."
Finally, it's over.
"We have some new students here at Hogwarts." Dumbledore announced.
AH! Will the torture never end?
"But none of these next students are first years. They will be studying as Seventh years and have all recently moved here from The United States of America. There, they had studied at the Salem Institute of Witchcraft."
"Brooke, Pennwick." A girl with chin length dark brown hair and eyes like black coffee walked up to the hat. She was wearing jeans and a nice tee. She was wearing imatation black converses (as in they're no really Converses). They were black. Wow. She's really confident for someone with a name like Pennwick.
The hat thought for a long while before yelling "Hufflepuff!" Pennwick got up, looking disappointed.
"Ralkin, Kiara." Kiara had shoulder length dirty blonde hair and green eyes. She was pretty tall and was wearing a football (british aka soccer) jersey and a pair of football shorts that said "Roo" on them. Weird. It was really weird because she was also wearing multi colored Roos.
A second after the hat touched her head it yelled, "Gryffindor." Kiara looked really happy and ran up to our table. She sat down between Ginny and me.
Yeah! A person for us.
"Smith, Thisbe." Everyone had to block their eyes before they were burned out of their sockets. This girl had totally uneven blonde hair that looked like Lavendar did her haircut... hm, does she know Lavendar? Anyway, she had blue eyes and was wearing a bright pink skirt, a pale pink shirt and a brigt pink sweatshirt. She also had on grey and pink Etines. Wow. Bright!
The hat thought for a minute before saying, "Gryffindor!" Thisbe happily skipped off to our table and plopped herself down between Harry and Ron.
"Guess what?" she said to Ron. She had a slightly high voice, and from what a could tell, she was really hyper.
"What?" Ron asked curiously.
"YOUR MOM!" She yelled and then she and Kiara cracked up.
Oooookkkkkaaaaayyyyy. Weird. Moving on...
"Sun, Madeline." Madeline was tall. Her long hair was bright red, with blonde highlights and she had blue eyes. She was wearing a lavendar and light blue stirped Aeropostale shirt, and a nice pair of jeans.
The sorting hat thought for a few seconds before saying, "Ravenclaw." Madeline walked to the appropriate table looking surprised. All of the other new seventh years laughed.
"What's so funny?" Ginny asked Kiara.
"Sunny is the blondest redhead you'll ever meet." Kiara said in a slightly low voice.
"Oh, I doubt that..." I replied, flashing a sideglance at Ron... who was staring up at the ceiling.
"How do they get it so starry?"
"Maybe it's magic..." Thisbe replied.
Oh yeah... They'll make a good pair.
Dumbledore stood up. "Now that we're done with the sorting, We can get started with our feast."
Cough. A really loud cough.
"You forgot me." A girl said loudly.
"Ah... yes. I do believe we did. Your name is Lucifer Lions then? Just sit down on the stool."
(A/N: Okay more theme music! Yeah! This time it's Bad to the Bone... but I gotta find out who wrote it. Hm... I'll put it in my author's note at the end of the chapter.)
QUE THEME MUSIC
Lucifer looked exactly like me. She could have been my twin... okay maybe not my twin, but the bushy brown hair? The chocolate brown eyes? Freckles?
There was only one major difference from us.
Style sense.
She had on completely beat up, faded and slashed jeans. They were baggy and lose and so beaten up that one pant leg stopped mid-shin. Her hair looked like it had been hacked at by gardening sheers and, now that I think about it, it probably was. Her hot pink Happy Bunny Shirt said "I'm not mean, You're just Sissy." She had a fake leather jacket on over her shirt and she was wearing Converses. Real Converses, not imitation Converses like her friend. High tops. The only thing was one was an army camoflauge Converse and the other was hot pink. What is up with that!
She also had a candy ciggarette in her mouth. Weird.
This girl's starting to scare me.
END THEME MUSIC
Lucifer strode up to the front of the hall then turned around to face everyone (A/N: For those of you who don't know, Lucifer means the Devil).
"My name is officially Lucy." She yelled. She had a voice that sounded like she was nice, but her attitude betrayed her. "You call me Lucifer, You die. Get it? Got it? Good."
She turned around and walked up to the hat. McGonnagall lifted it up and she sat under it.
The hat was still inches off her head when it made it's decision.
"Slytherin."
Well, no shock there.
Thisbe and Kiara snorted.
"Okay, I'll bite." Harry said. "What's so funny this time?"
"Lucy always does the bad girl act when she goes some place new. By tomorrow morning she'll be your best friend. You know she's really good at that... making friends. She'll probably bridge any gap..." Kiara explained (A/N: Did I just make that character sound perfect or what? Sorry I didn't mean to... :-() hey he has a mouth! Yeah!).
"But, she's in Slytherin." Dean replied.
"So? A house has never changed Lucy." Thisbe said.
First Perosn (Draco):
Lucy was coming towards our table.
More importantly, she was coming towards me.
You know, she is kind of cute in a bad-girl way. And we all know how much I like bad girls... Hehe. This could be fun.
Lucy plopped herself down between me and Pansy. Touche. Be my guest, as long as I don't have to sit next to Pansy the leech.
"Hey," Lucy said, "I'm Lucy. Lucy Lions."
"And I'm Draco. Draco Malfoy. Slytherin extrodinare. If you need any help with school or the house or anything, really, just ask me."
"Thanks, Draco. So is she your girlfriend?" Lucy replied, nodding her head to Pansy.
Pansy was just about to say yes when I replied, "NO! I'm single."
Hopefully not for long...
"Really..." Lucy said.
Third Person:
Well, the feast went by pretty quickly after that. What with Ron shoveling down food, Harry eating and looking at Ron in amazement and Hermione picking at her food whil staring at both of them wondering 'how can anyone eat food that fast?'
Lucy and Draco kept talking throughout the rest of the feast... and, about what? You'll have to find out in the next chapter.
Shortly after the feast, Professor Dumbledore gathered the Head Boy and Girl, Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger, and gave them a briefing...
First Person (Hermione):
Dumbledore called us up to the teacher's table.
"Well, you two are some of thebrightest students to come through here for a long time. Therefore, normally we would completely weigh you down with responsibilities to give the other students a chance. However I have a feeling that you will be rather distracted by the new Hogwarts Idol anyways, so all you have to plan is the balls, the Hogwarts Idol parties and the whole entire set of Hogwarts Idol. Havve fun! Oh, and your Common Rooms and Dormitories are located through the door off the side of the hall," he gestured towards the door that the Champions walked through in our fourth year, "and through the portrait of the theater. Talk to the actors and actresses to make a pasword."
After that, Dumbledore headed off towards his office.
"Well, at least we won't be weighed down..." Draco commented sarcastically.
Hehe...
"We should go check out the Commons, shouldn't we?"
I pushed past im before he could answer and went through the indicated door.
Well, at least it's secluded... but I don't like the idea of going past Snape to get to my room... or the fact that he knows where I sleep... Ew... bad thoughts...
The portrait was of a very pretty stage with red curtains and very nice, tan polished wood. In the center of the stage was a girl with bushy brown hair and a boy with blonde hair. Ew...
"So what should the password be?" asked Draco looking disgusted.
"How about 'the head girl kicks ass'? That sounds apropriate."
"No. Dumbledore would eventually hear the password and we'd have to explain. How about 'the head boy kicks butt'? It's so much better."
"No. How about 'the head girl and boy kick butt'? Is that okay with you?"
"I guess, but I don't like the part about you kicking butt. Wait. Whose butt?"
"Harry's, Ron's, your's, EVERYBODY'S!" Hehe. I kick butt!
"You're scaring me."
"I tend to do that to people. Anyway, our password is the 'the head girl..."
Cough.
"...and boy kick butt."
The portrait swung open and we stepped into our new common room.
There was only one word that could describe it.
"Wow."
A/N: So how did everyone like that? A bit less funny than the last two chapters? If it is I'm sorry. I'd like to say, though, that I wrote the sorting hat's song. And wasn't it crappy? Ok, well leave a review and I'll get back to you! I love everyone who reviewed the last chapter. I was so pumped about those first 14 reviews and I still haven't gotten a bad review for that chapter yet! I love every review that came after those first 14 too! I LOVE THIS! It's my most popular story.
Anyways that chapter was 2695 words.
How do you like the new characters. Let's see if anyone can guess which one is me. There all based on me and my friends.
If anyone was wondering Hermione's new personality is based on a combination of me and all of my friends, and the average teenage girl, because, let me tell you, none of us are in any way, average.
Review Feedback:
alBBie: Sorry about the choice in bands! There will probably be some more of those bands but, tell me which bands you like and I will work them in. lol. My brother loves that joke. Any time our family is just hanging out we say "One time, at band camp..." It's hysterical... Thanks for reviewing!
A League of Their Own Fan: Thanks! I hope this was soon enough. Three days. Two days of writing this chapter. Thanks a buch for reviewing!
CandyCoveredLove: Thank you so much! I'm so glad this story is such a hit! Only two chapters and 30 reviews! Wow! I hope you liked this new chapter!
Oh Girl: Thanks! I love this. My brother thinks I'm the least funniest person in the world and everyone keeps telling me how much they've been cracking up! I hoped you liked those songs! I did them by memory... Thanks a million for reviewing for this story!
MCR: Thanks so much! I got someone to reconsider a weird and different Hermione! Awesome!
Not mad mentally unstable: Okay, first thin I've got to say is that I love your penname! It's awesome! Thanks about Hermione. I try and apparently some people like! How's this for fast? Thanks for reviewing!
VampireHelsing: Thanks! Is this good enough to satisfy you?
Kiara Ralkin: Well Kiara, this is before school starts and you are in this chapter... yeah! How do you like my character? Okay all you've got to do is email me your new chapters before you post them. My email is Talk to you soon! Bye!
melmit-hankercheif: I'm so glad you checked this story out, too! Yeah I love it when characters are out of character for a reason. If not it seems kind of weird... But I'm weird anyways. Aussieland, cool. I'm so glad you like the mind span thing. I was afraid some people would think it was childish, but I guess not. The mindspan thing is totally based on me. And the draco's cute thing. Guess which new character I am! BTW, nice penname.
The Gryffindor Drummer: Thanks a million for reviewing and the compliment! I hope this was son enough...
CherryIzzy: Everyone seems to like the song part... and can you believe I was sitting on my bunk bed at camp, at night writing that? I had a sudden inspiration! Thanks so much! Everyone at my school uses the word discombobulated and it was in a comic strip once. Anyway, It's a great word, and I'm glad you like the story!
Draco's-naughty-lil-girl: Thanks! I just hope you keep reading! I love your pen name!
Sabrina: Thanks so much for reviewing! I hope you like it!
DarknessxFallsx: Thanks a bunch! The mindspan thing is going over really well! I'll definately read your story!
Feltonluva006: I hope asap is now... hehe. Thanks you so much! Nice pen name!
Craziest Good Charlotte Fan: Thank you so much! You really seem to like it! You got that line off of didn't you? I read that thing. Yeah Good Charlotte does kick butt.
Whocares: lol! Hehe... anyway, thanks so much! I hope you like this chapter!
Craziweirdo: I know what you mean... everyone in that room is stupid.. hehe! I gotta go bye! Thanks a bunch!
IN THIS REVIEW TELL ME WHICH CHARACTER YOU THINK IS BASED ON ME! MOST OF THE CHARACTERS LOOK LIKE WHO THEY'RE BASED ON!
Now...
R
E
V
I
E
W
l
U
l
U
l
U
l
U
Cute Smileys! lol.