Chapter 5: Compromise

When Christian wakes up, Ana's bunk is empty. He finds her outside, helping Dorian make breakfast.

"The ducks are one of our favorite sources of meat and between the oats we grow here and goats, we have enough food supplies to last the winter." Dorian is sitting back on a camping chair with a cup of tea in hand, watching Ana flipping eggs and sausages.

"We have fish, chickens, cattle, and vegetables of course — but we don't have ducks." Ana admits.

"Good Morning." Christian steps into the pop-up tent they're cooking under.

"Christian! Hope you're well rested. Your woman here was just telling me about Rushmere." Dorian's excitement makes Christian reluctant to correct him. Christian looks to Ana. Will you inform the old man?

Ana piles the eggs and sausage onto a plate, tight-lipped.

"Eat up you kids. I already had myself toast this morning, but didn't want to leave ya' hungry. I'm going to be out most of the day, but I'll be back at dinner. You two enjoy yourselves." Dorian stands up and straightens out his stark white beard. He begins walking off to the shed near the exit.

"Thanks Dorian." Ana splits their food and takes a seat.

"You sleep well?" Because I didn't. Christian makes small talk.

"Yes."

Christian chews silently. Ana doesn't say another word during their meal. When he finishes his plate and washes it, he turns back to Ana, "Go on, say it."

Ana has barely touched her food. She pokes at her plate, avoiding eye contact, "Say what?"

"You see me differently now."

"Christian." Ana's tone warns him.

"Ana." Christian challenges.

Ana gets up to leave, exasperated, "I don't want to start my day like this."

Christian reaches for her arm, but before he can grasp it, Ana whips her head in his direction, and simply demands, "Don't."

Christian relents in the face of her piercing eyes, dropping his hand. He doesn't remember ever having to deal with this kind of behavior. He was a militia captain for crying out loud. Ana finds a spot under a tree far off to eat alone. He doesn't like the idea of sulking all day so opts to check out the local ponds and see if he can get permission to fish, maybe he can make a trade if so.

After Ana finishes her meal, she spends her time talking to some of the community members. She meets the mother she saw hanging clothes yesterday, her name is Rosa.

She offers to help her with any chores for the day and Rosa gladly accepts, "With these three handfuls I'll take any help I can get!".

It turns out the three children clinging to her hem are her two sons and daughter. Ana is surprised to see such a large family, people weren't exactly thriving back in Rushmere. Ana tills a patch of land in the backyard while Rosa attempts to get the children to help. It's nippy out, but Spring is around the corner.

"So, is it just you in this house?" Ana asks Rosa, curious if the father was still around. Ana doesn't remember seeing a likely candidate around town.

"Yes, just the three rascals and I. Their father is no longer with us." Rosa looks down at her sons and daughter playing with the farm equipment. Although he is gone he lives through his children in some small way. Their brown hair and blue eyes are his.

"I'm sorry to hear that." It's not an unusual story to hear, but leaving behind three children is rough nonetheless.

"We've all lost someone."

Ana agrees. She finishes tilling a row and moves on to the next patch.

Rosa gives up on teaching her children for the day, taking a row by herself. She notices Ana is a hard worker and appreciates her willingness to get her hands dirty, "So what are you doing all the way up in Wisconsin? I heard you're from Rushmere."

"Just a long journey for supplies." Ana keeps it vague.

"You and your boyfriend aren't looking for somewhere to stay?" Rosa secretly hopes for more female residents. There was Susan and Irene, but a majority of the settlement were males.

Ana is unsurprised at this point by the presumption, "Christian isn't my boyfriend."

"Oh, I'm sorry. Just the way Dorian was speaking about you folks, I thought…"

"It's okay, we're just traveling together. Christian makes a good guide… and guard."

"I'll say, he looks like the military type."

"He's a mercenary as far as I know. I've only known him for about a month though."

"You'd never know looking at the both of you. Traveling can do that to people. That's how Finn and I got along — my deceased husband. We found this settlement seven years ago."

"I'm glad you seem comfortable now." Although Rushmere is Ana's home, she can't help but to picture living somewhere else. Away from all of the memories of her missing father.

"Moderately comfortable." Rosa corrects, smiling.

The day flies by chatting with Rosa. Dorian comes back around just in time to deliver dinner and go back to his own hobble.

It's just Ana and Christian again, sitting on bunks opposite from one another.

"Are we going to talk now?" Christian has been thinking of what to say all day. If they're traveling tomorrow they need to set this right.

Christian is about to resign himself to another night of the silent treatment, but Ana cuts through the quietness with a specific request.

"No killing people on our trip together."

"What?"

"If you want to talk, I don't want you killing people."

Christian scoffs, "Don't be unreasonable Ana. We need to protect ourselves."

"That's not what I mean Christian. I'm not referring to self-defense. I'm saying no contracts to kill and no killing innocent people."

"Here we go again with 'innocent people'"

"Just to be absolutely clear, I mean people who are not trying to harm us."

"Okay."

"Our journey ends if you do."

Christian's tone is clipped, "Got it." He'd do what he must. He still finds it ridiculous that she seems to think he can't control himself in such a manner. He was nothing if not prudent whenever killing was involved.

"Thank you." Ana can't believe she's thanking someone for agreeing to not be a cold-blooded murderer for a couple of weeks.

"Can we talk about tomorrow now that you got that off your chest?"

"Don't trivialize the topic."

"I'm not trivializing it, I'm pointing out that it's a concern that you have. I don't kill people offhandedly Ana, it's a serious decision."

"It's good to know you thoroughly think about the lives you take before going through with it Christian. I'm sure their families appreciate the forethought." Ana's voice drips with sarcasm.

Christian opens his mouth then closes it. He really didn't want to say something he'd regret. How could he make her see that he wasn't a monster? And even if he could, would he believe himself?

Ana can see Christian turning a shade of red. Would this be a turning point? Would she see his true nature?

After taking a deep breath she sees his coloring return to normal. Looking defeated he speaks, "I'll try my best Ana. I would never expose you to something like that unless it is absolutely necessary."

Cocking her head, Ana observes Christian's perspective. She expected him to take the bait and fly off the handle. His control is admirable, it almost makes her feel guilty. Almost.

"You still want to set out tomorrow?" Ana offers a change in subject.

Christian is visibly relieved, "The sooner the better."

"It is comfy here." Ana laments, she'd be sad to leave.

Christian unpacks his map of Wisconsin again, motioning for Ana to come over. Christian managed to trade fish for some decent food rations that would last longer. This would give them the ability to skip a settlement. Once the route is confirmed, Christian folds his map and carefully slides it back into his bag.

"There are a lot of bears in this state, so I'd rather not camp in any makeshift tent. That and even though winter is ending, we don't want to risk being in a storm." Christian warns.

"Well, by how you handled yourself earlier, bears should be no problem."

"Ha, an aggressive bear is another story."

"Fine, we can do shorter trips to secure shelter." Ana is reasonable when she chooses to be.

"As much as I hate to say it, this is why getting a headstart is important." Christian turns to Ana, "I like it here too."

She finds his eyes unsettling, she wonders what he's trying to tell her. She doesn't wonder for long when he slides his hand over her's.

"Stay in my bunk tonight." Christian found the distance between them last night to be uncomfortable.

Ana didn't expect him to be this direct with her clear displeasure about his past deeds. His ability to move on from an argument is both alarming and heartwarming. Or perhaps he has ulterior motives. She shifts closer to him and speaks under her breath, "That depends, are we sleeping?" She smirks.

Having her near him was his main thought, but he can't say he hadn't thought about it, "We won't do anything you're not comfortable with."

If this were any other man, Ana would have said no, but her original plans come to the forefront of her mind again. It was hard for her to be this open, but this may be the best option. She turns her palm up to hold Christian's hand back in a soft grip. He smiles lightly, taking this as a yes.

Christian lays onto his side and brings Ana with him, spooning her. He moves his sheets to cover both of them. He rests his chin on Ana's silky hair and wraps his arms around her. They breathe together for a few minutes before Christian presses a kiss on top of Ana's head. He hates to bring it up again, but it's eating him up inside, "Ana, I'd never hurt you. I hope you know that."

Ana is confused by the statement, did she give off the impression that she was scared of him?

"That's not my concern."

"I kill to survive, not for pleasure."

"Can we not talk about this now?"

"I'm sorry."

Ana traces her thumb across Christian's forearm, following the scar there to distract herself, "Where'd you get this?"

Christian mumbles against her hair, "That couple. The woman slashed me across my arm. It needed seven stitches."

So much for changing the topic. Ana huffs. She moves her fingers to his hands, opting to brush her fingers across that instead. They stay in that position for a good moment.

"Ana?" Christian whispers in the dark.

Ana continues her absentminded tracing across his hands, "Hmm?"

"Why did you sleep with me in Richmond?"

There is silence for a minute, Ana thinks. She points out, "Technically, we didn't have sex."

Christian smiles against her head, "Oral sex."

Ana turns around to look Christian in the eyes. She continues her menstrations on his beard now, thumbing his jawline, "You're handsome."

Christian chuckles, "That's it?" He doesn't know whether to be flattered or insulted.

"You seemed like you needed it." Ana traces his Adam's apple now.

"So, I come across as a sex-starved man?" Christian loosens his grip on Ana.

"No, lonely."

Christian doesn't like this answer either, "So, it was pity sex?"

"It was a mutual feeling."

"Oh." Christian doesn't know what to say. Ana never striked him as someone who struggled with loneliness. From what he knew though, with no parents or family, he could see where it came from.

"Did it help?" Ana asks, referring to the loneliness she sensed. She knows she hasn't felt that gnawing feeling in her chest since that night.

Christian thinks about it, "Maybe." He moves his hands to Ana's hips. He leans forward and pecks Ana on the lips,, "I may need another try to tell."

Ana chuckles, "Such a gentleman."

Christian smirks, "Never said I was one." He pulls her to his chest, nuzzling her neck.

With an early start and fresh clothes, the duo headout at 5:30 AM sharp. Graciously, it hasn't snowed recently, making the journey a little less tedious. Ana and Christian discuss the possibility of getting a vehicle when they hit Minnesota in a few days. Christian notes that there's a lot more clear highways there and less scavengers.

"The issue is payment. The only thing that could possibly pay for it is my rifle and I'm not trading it in." Christian was given his Ruger at fifteen and it never left his inventory since. He had only stored it away for an M4 in his abolitionist days.

Ana has similar feelings towards her pistol, sure it was a humble 9mm, but it was her best form of defense.

Christian used to have a lot of connections with mechanics and the like, but that was simply the nature of being in the militia. Daring to contact any old friends would surely bring Elliot and his militia down on him. He could get a car running himself, but that would require immense resources. Junkyards across America were picked bone dry over a decade ago. Maybe some of the cars out on the roads could offer parts, but the weight of it would make it infeasible. That's if he could find anything beyond rust. Of course there was Minneapolis, but bringing Ana into such dangerous territory would be reckless.

They make it to Beaver Dam with plenty of time to spare. It's a beautiful quaint town that is right off of Beaver Dam Lake. The silence is eerie and Ana wonders why a settlement didn't thrive here. It seemed to have the essentials: a water resource, some solid intact buildings, and lots of land to garden on.

The lake looks inviting, Christian decides to hunker down for the night with a quick fishing session. He spots an old dock to tie his rod to and wait out the night. Ana has other ideas, it's quite nippy but they already have a fire going and snow is absent here — she removes her shoes and dips her toes in next to Christian. It'd be nice to soak after a long walk. Christian tries not to look over, but catches her movements in the corner of his eye. She's stripping off her clothes.

Christian avoids the temptation to turn his head, "It's pretty cold for a dip." He's worried she'll catch a fever.

He hears her lower herself into the lake and the water lapping at her naked form. Ana comments, "It's not too bad. Quite nice."

Christian turns his head now, the sight of her bare shoulders and brown hair sticking to her naked form excites him. He shifts, trying to make his state less evident.

"Why don't you join me?" Ana teases. She cups the water into her hands and splashes it over her hair.

Christian doesn't respond at first. He glances at his fishing pole then back to Ana. Fuck it. He throws caution to the wind as he removes his shirt and stands up to undo his pants. Unlike Christian, Ana watches him stripping shamelessly. Christian doesn't comment, but looks straight at her while removing his boxers. Her eyes comb over his manhood as he steps into the water.

He wades to her and cups her chin to look her in the eyes, "My eyes are up here Ana."

Ana, for once, has the decency to blush. The color flushing her skin is quite pleasing to him. She grabs his hand, pulling him closer. He wastes no time capturing her lips and holding her damp hair to keep her still. He rests his forehead against her, "You are quite bold Ms. Steele."

Ana's lips offer a halfhearted smile, she lays her hands on his chest to feel him. His comment makes her realize this isn't her normal self. Her motives have pushed her past boundaries she held for her entire life. She still hasn't slept with a man and here she is, offering herself up on a platter to be consumed whole.

Christian notices the shift in mood, he moves his hand down to grab her waist, "What's wrong?" He searches her eyes for an answer.

"I don't know if I am." Ana finds herself confessing, boldness is usually not her prerogative.

"I'm quite sure you are, you mad woman."

His words from their first intimate night together ignite a fire in her. She would be whoever he wanted if that's what it took. This time Ana kisses him, hungry and impatient — their tongues caressing and exploring one another's.

She feels him now, erect against her stomach. The closeness of his sex to her's reminds her of the danger of their exchange. She promised him that she would stop him if he went too far. Christian's hands slide from her waist to her ass, cupping her with evident delight. He's lost and she can feel it. He hoists her up and lets Ana wrap her legs around him.

He's not inside her, but she feels his hand slip between them to adjust himself. Before they can go further, she grabs his hand and halts their kissing.

"Christian." she warns, when she catches the look in his eyes, she nearly lets his hand go. The intensity of his gaze disarms her. He looks determined, but doesn't shake off her grip.

"Ana." Christian voice barely whispers. He knows he shouldn't have tried, but this woman makes him lose his better judgement.

Ana hushes him with her lips, moving her hand to his cock. She strokes him gently.

He revels in her touch, but his mind can't help but to ponder what her soft folds feel like against his cock. He tries again, swatting her hand away this time. He lines his cock up with her entrance. He's nearly there, pressing against her folds, but suddenly she lets go of him and drops back into the water.

"Christian." Ana scolds this time, turning her back to him.

Christian watches Ana hold herself now as she slowly moves to the edge of the lake. Don't leave. He panics, he catches her just as she's stepping out. Spooning her from behind, he gently drags her back in, "I'm sorry."

Ana melts into his embrace, feeling him nuzzling the side of her face. He must admit he found himself confused, by her combination of forwardness and caution, but he would respect her wishes. It didn't help his current situation though; Ana can still feel him stiff against her ass now.

As she ponders what else they could do, Christian already moves to another idea. She can feel him grabbing her waist again, this time positioning the length of his cock between her asscheeks. He pushes Ana forward and squeezes her asscheeks together around his cock, beginning to thrust back and forth. If she won't let him have her in the front, he could certainly get off with the sight of her ass.

The sight makes him ponder anal, but he doesn't want to assume Ana is ready for that. He would get her anyway he could. His grunts and tight grip deter Ana from moving him off at first, but she finds herself wet from excitement. Their first time brought her no release and it's only fair if she gets pleasure from this too. Once she feels his semen pulsing onto her backside, she whips around, kisses him urgently, and demands, "It's my turn Mr. Grey."

Christian stands disoriented for a moment, coming down from his high. Her words register, and he offers a cheeky smile. She grabs his hand and leads it to her nether regions, "Please me."

He knows what to do. It's only fair.

Their next stop is Portage then Tomah which is much of the same empty towns.

Rochester has a settlement, but it will take them at least three days from Tomah. Most of their journey is unhindered, but between Tomah and Rochester, Ana and Christian see the first humans they've spotted since Anaville. Halfway through their fourth day of hiking, Christian sees the two men scavenging for car parts in the middle of the road. One is busy working in the hood of a car while the other is hopping over other vehicles and checking the condition of others.

The unsettling part is they're wearing field uniforms. Christian can't make out the insignia on their tops but is not willing to get close enough to know. Ana agrees, they take a detour far into the nearby forest. Their original path had options as far as housing, but now they're moving into unknown territory. Staying outdoors was not a good option. The new route takes them an additional three hours, but they are still able to find a house shortly after darkness falls.

The problem presents itself the next day when Christian hears the unmistakable sound of a moving vehicle outside. Ana is still fast asleep, but Christian manages to peek out the window and see a tan truck avoiding potholes and cars down the road. He has his rifle in hand in a moment and crouches out of view from the window, he makes his way to Ana and shakes her awake gently.

Ana shifts, "Hmm."

"Ana, there are people outside. Get up." Christian keeps his volume low, the truck was coming up on them now. Christian looks to their fireplace, the smoke from the chimney is a dead giveaway. Maybe they can make it if they take a back door.

Ana blinks twice and is immediately on her feet, slapping on her jacket and stuffing her pistol back into her deep pocket. She's shoving on her second shoe when she hears the truck stop outside.

"Hey there!" a voice shouts from the entrance, soon a man is peering through the window. There is another figure behind him. If Ana wasn't here, Christian knows he would've shot that man. They can't be too smart if they're pressing their foreheads against the glass of a building they know is occupied.

"We're coming in!" A voice announces, the strangers let themselves through the entrance. Christian and Ana recognize them. They're the two men from the road yesterday, both scruffy and with military garb. They take in the scene before them, Christian standing next to the hearth rifle gripped firmly in his right hand and Ana in the middle of the room putting on her backpack.

The taller of the two strangers, peeks around the room. Christian presumes looking for anyone else present. Their uniforms present a green patch with black antlers, he doesn't recognize the insignia.

"What's going on here?" the other one questions, placing his hand on his holster.

Christian tries his best to compose himself, the question is absurd. They were in an abandoned town in the middle of nowhere, any organization worth their salt would've gated it off if they cared about travelers sleeping in their buildings. He plays along if anything to avoid confrontation, "Is there a problem?"

"We're clearing buildings on this trail. This is now Jumper territory."

"We won't be any trouble; we were just on our way out." Christian's tone is clipped. He looks to Ana, motioning for them to take the back door.

"Hold up a second." the one looking around the room stops and stares at Christian's rifle, "That a bold-action?"

Christian tightens his grip, "Yes."

"You mind letting me take a look at it?"

Christian looks between both of the men, "I do mind."

The shorter one chuckles at his friend's attempt then inquires, "Got anymore friends around here?"

"No." Christian answers.

"The girl here speak at all?"

Ana flinches at the question, she didn't realize she was quiet this entire time. Her nerves are on edge.

Christian notices Ana's demeanor and takes a step towards the men, "Gentlemen, we need to leave."

"Let the pretty girl talk." The stranger inches closer to Ana, a Cheshire cat smile slowly emerging on his boney face.

Ana instinctively takes a step back, but the man grips Ana's arm, "You got any friends around here sweetheart?"

The stranger's grip on Ana sets Christian off, in an instant he has the rifle aimed at the intruder's head, "Take your hands off of her or I'm blowing your head off."

The man quickly complies, but Christian also keeps his buddy in view. Christian snarls, "Get the fuck out."

Attune to the danger of the situation Ana already has her handgun out, eyes darting back and forth between the men. She can see Christian has clearly lost his temper; the restraint he's showing makes the veins on his hands well-defined.

Keeping his hands up, the man who touched Ana backs towards the door. He is seemingly surrendering, but Christian is not fooled. He sees a motion to his left, his friend is reaching into his holster. Before Ana can even aim her gun, Christian's rifle goes off piercing the man dead between the eyes. The blood spatters onto Ana's shirt and face, she recoils.

The man that was exiting also experiences a moment of shock, just enough time to delay his drawing time. Christian has already reached for the revolver on his belt and finishes him off in one bullet. He doesn't even flinch at the dropping bodies. When he looks up, he sees the panic in Ana's eyes.

Christian moves across the room to touch her, but she doubles-back — her fingers touch the blood on her face in disbelief, "You killed them."

"Ana, they had a hold on you. I had to stop them." Christian knows they could've held her as a hostage at any moment. However, in the recesses of his mind he knows his instinct told him. She's mine.

"They didn't hurt me." Ana's eyes well up in tears as she looks at the limp bodies on the floor, the man who had the fortune of getting shot by a rifle is too gnarled to even recognize.

"They would've if they had the chance." Christian says this as if he was certain. His arrogance angers Ana.

"You don't know that."

"I've been doing this for a long time Ana. Trust me, they were not friendly. They would've used you as a meatshield, killed the both of us, and taken our gear. He has no business putting his hands on you. No right." Christian raises his voice at the end. Remorse floods in when he sees Ana flinch away.

She leaves the cabin immediately; she can't handle the sight of the corpses.

Christian immediately follows her in her wake, afraid she's running away, afraid she's leaving him. He pleads, "Ana, I'm here for your protection. I can't risk taking chances like that." He whips her around to look at him, but blanches when he sees hot tears running down her face.

"You're my guide Christian, nobody asked you to kill." Ana can't even look at him, she tries to brush off the tears with her forearm.

He pulls her into him, "Oh Anastasia, I don't want you hurt." He must admit he feels no guilt over their deaths, but hurting Ana is the last thing he wanted to do. He holds her like that for a long time, until he gently nudges her to wash off.

Ana contemplates calling off the trip, but something didn't sit right about those two men. They seemed predatory, but did they deserve to die? Did Christian break his promise or save her life? She's lost.

Author's Note: Thank you to everyone for the kind words and comments. I do read every one of them! Just a heads up, this story is a ten-chapter fic. It was originally a one-shot from the cabin scene you all read but grew overtime. I'm looking forward to releasing them all, but I am slowly pacing my editing.