In the End

by dinkyfairybaby

This is a one shot, it may be confusing to people, but it’s written from the point of view of drunken Hermione, her thoughts jump around explaining why shes doing what she’s doing. DMHG read n review please

A.N. This is a one shot, it may be confusing to people, but it's written from the point of view of drunken Hermione, her thoughts jump around explaining why shed doing what she's doing.

In the end:

If I could, then I would, ill go where ever you will go.

I hope there's someone out there who can bring me back to you.

Tears streaming, drunkenly slurring out the words, how is it possible, how could she have let it happen? How? She couldn't think like that, not now not ever. It felt like she was dying, and in reality she smirked to herself she was, she could feel herself becoming more lethargic as the pills shed taken a few hours earlier affected her, 'not long now' she thought to herself.

He's saved her, he'd been there when no one else was, he'd looked in to her and seen something, something worth saving. Or at least that's what she thought, she reached for the bottle swaying dangerously as she grabbed at it, pulling it to her lips she took another swig, it burned as it went down, feeling it, she could feel it, tears stained her face and new ones cascaded down the old tracks as she thought about it all again. Why had she let herself get this far, she promised herself she'd new let herself get this far.

She'd been here before, she hated herself.

Pure and simple, hatred.

Simple it was, but powerful, everything that had brought her to this moment, everything.

Why didn't you save me, songs playing in the room she was in were only making it worse, she laughed bitterly to herself, she'd do this all the time, normally just with a bottle of that weeks topical bottle. This time she'd gone further, but she didn't care, not because she wouldn't wake up after it, she didn't want to, she didn't care that she mite hurt a few people, all they'd done was hurt her, she couldn't take it anymore. She wasn't as strong as they thought, she needed them, she'd cried out but she was alone, they left her, he left her. She was alone, and she was lost. Everything had brought her here.

From the look in my eye, why didn't you just save me?
And all of my friends, Think I'm losing my mind.
I just can't believe I'm blinded by what I'd need,
It's like an empty space I need to fill the void.

When you looked in my eyes you knew I needed saving,
and when you saw me getting high Why didn't you come save me?

All of my life I've locked away my feelings,
and all of this time I've been living a lie.
I was so afraid, pathetically misleading,
it was my empty space, a need to fill my void.

When you looked in my eyes you knew I needed saving,
and when you saw me getting high Why didn't you come save me?
When I blamed you for my lies why didn't you just tell me?
Cause when I looked in my eyes, there's nothing there worth saving

Save Me why didn't you just save me?
Save me why didn't you just save me?

Why didn't you just save me?

I begged you; I tried to tell you I needed you, all I needed was you to need me. Why couldn't you need me, trust is hard. It's hard for me, its damn hard but I gave you everything I made it fucking easy

She replayed the argument in her mind, why had she made it so easy? She'd promised she would never let herself fall that hard for anyone, not after what she'd seen, not after what she'd been threw, it would be too painful, and here she was, lying on the bathroom floor of some sleazy hotel, covered in stale alcohol, smelling of stale cigarette smoke, crying over him.

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far

In some ways it was laughable, him? Of all people! And then there were the tears, before she'd cried, she'd cried her bloody eyes out, begging to fuck knows who her daddy would live, she'd cried herself to sleep, she'd cried when people died. But she'd never cried like this, when the tears just seemed to keep coming, the whole inside was so big, she was just crying, and even when she was sure her throat couldn't take anymore hacking sobs out she cried more, how could anyone cry this much?

She was slipping, she could feel it, she laid her head back on the cool tile of the floor. She was just waiting, waiting for the end. She'd been here too long she'd seen too much. She was only young, but she'd seen much more than most. Held back much more than most, choked it back holding it in, but it came forward, vomiting it all over her life she'd tried to build.

It was almost over now, she was going, a sarcastic smile graced her face, here in the end, she was alone, she began surrounded by everyone, slowly they left her, she wasn't worth anything to them, she was alone, she wasn't worth enough.

He rushed in to the room, eyes full of concern. He loved her, he'd told her so, but that had only made her worse. He didn't know what to do. He knew he was to blame, he knew he'd driven her to this confusion, the last straw… she just couldn't take anymore, all because he couldn't let her in, he couldn't, no he wouldn't let her be herself, he'd squashed it out of her, abusing her mentally, making her feel lost, she had no one, no one knew her better, this sight was his fault.

He reached the body, he picked up her hand, it was cold.

Cold.

So cold, her skin was always warm, and beautifully creamy coloured, with a tint of tan, he looked at her now, she was pale, deathly pale. He reached up to touch her neck. There had to be a pulse. She couldn't be dead.

There was no pulse.

She was dead.

Hermione Granger was dead.

She died in some scummy muggle hotel, because of Draco Malfoy.

He slumped back against the wall, what had he done?

He sent of the appropriate alarms using his wand and sat there, staring, why? Why had she done it? He knew her reasons, he alone knew them, but he wouldn't, he couldn't accept them. He just wanted to say he was sorry, in truth he knew it wouldn't have helped. He'd said sorry, but sorry wasn't good enough, sorry hadn't slowed the flow of her tears, or quelled the pain he felt radiate from her eyes when she last looked at him.

Those eyes

Those beautifully honey coloured eyes, so warm, so strong and so knowing; now open pits, drawing you in to the lifeless face on the floor. He couldn't look, but somehow he couldn't look away.

They came; they moved him to the other room. He sat there, not saying a word. It was as if a hole had just opened up and swallowed him, or at least half of him, he always thought she would be there, he wanted to go back. He wanted her back.

He stood up, and left, oblivious to the calls of everyone in the room.

He was alone, he had no one, there was no one to go back to, finally, it hit him, he'd done this to her. She'd reached out to him, and he'd pushed her away.

He reached in to his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper, she'd left it on his night stand:

"Surrounded by pain, I look to you for relief. You stand there looking at me as if I asked you to save the world."

Tears poured out of his eyes, he had lost her, he knew no one would ever care about him like she had, no one would ever look past all the bad, put up with all the shit, no one would ever be her. He cried for his loss, he cried for the fact it was his fault and he would have to live with that forever. He cried because he was alone. Everything had lead him to where he was, everything, because she was his everything, and now he had lost her he knew, he needed her.

Hermione Granger was dead, and with her she took Draco Malfoy, heart and soul.

A.N. Hope you like, please review.