Ass of Fire
Ass of fire,
Bag of fertilizer,
Came out my sore backsider!
Gorged myself
On Spicy Dips
And one too many Ninja Chips,
Ramen Noodles
& Barbecue Tips,
Outta my way cuz I got da rips!
Consternation
Plus Flatulation
Equal major bowel movementation!
Toiler Paper,
Glade Aerator
Do not exist in this feudal era!
No outhouse here.
But have no fear,
A nice substitute is quite near!
God Tree'll grow
With seed I sow:
InuYoukai shit-shampoo!
Feel 10lbs lighter
48 hours later.
Turbulent anus somewhat better?
Air seems thick.
Do small check-
Flora & fauna dying real quick.
Looks like LA
To my dismay.
Why's it raining demons today?
Ding! Litebulb on!
Ass pois-on
Kills more than 100 de-mon!
Screw katana!
Off with hakama,
Look out while I bend over!
Point ass to sky.
Let one fly!
Butt something's gone awry…
Pain immense.
No common sense.
Rub tender gluteus maximus.
Something's wet.
Awwww yuck!
Can't believe I stepped in it.
Look behind me,
Cautiously see
A very wide-eyed Inu-Tachi.
Friends aghast
By the big blast
"That came out your ass?"
Laid a portrait
Or a statuette-
Work of (f)art, holy f'n shit!
Won award,
Upgrade 4 sword-
Funky Stench Potty Blade!
Now to defeat
That Deadbeat
With new air-splitting technique!
Tried to depart,
Body fell apart
Due to incessant stinging fart(s).
Can't walk right
Nor sit up straight
Won't be killing demons tonite.
Oh cool, neato!
Got proviso (item).
WTF is this stuff called "Beano?"
Need beer,
Just laying here
With naked Vaseline covered rear.
Buddies smirk.
Bunch o'jerks!
They know how much ass hurts.
They still smile…
Growl, snarl.
Swearing off food for a while.
Totally beat.
Can't take heat!
Hey! By the way, what's to eat?