Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me.

Harry Potter was head-over-heels in love with Ginny. He was completely obsessed with her. He loved her hair that was the color of rust and how she was funnier than an elephant in a tutu. He was absolutely infatuated! He wanted to hold her till he strangled her and snog her till she turned blue in the face.

Harry looked out the window from his dormitory room and thought about beautiful, clever Ginny. What WAS it that he liked about her? Was it because going out with her made him feel like he was dating a female version of Ron? Or was it because she reminded him of his mom? Harry didn't know. All he knew was that he loved her. He wondered if he should ask her to go to Hogsmeade with him today. That would make him happy. Then he could look into her sparkling eyes again and stare dreamily until she blushed and punched him in the face. That would make him very happy. Harry made up his mind to ask her on a date.

Ginny sat in the common room and wondered where her boyfriend, Harry was. She liked Harry. She liked him a lot. She loved his eyes that were as green as a fresh-pickled toad, and his hair the color of a blackboard, but she didn't really know what she saw in him. Was it because he was famous? Ginny remembered when she was in her fourth year and Harry was in his fifth. Harry had acted like a PMS-ing woman. He had thrashed about, complaining and yelling and shouting and feeling betrayed. Ginny hated when her darling Harry was like that. Then he lost Sirius and had looked like a lost little boy. Ginny felt like mothering him. Except at that moment Ginny decided she didn't really want to see Harry because Peeves suddenly zoomed him and dropped a vase on her head. She went unconscious. A few seconds later, she woke up and had no memory about Harry for some reason.

Who's Harry, she thought. Why am I thinking about that name? I never liked the name Harry. It sounds like the name of a perverted old man. I think I should think of the name Colin. Colin is such a pretty name for a boy. I especially like the name Creevey. It reminds me of creeks. I like creeks. Creeks make me feel calm. I feel calm.

Just then, Harry came bouncing downstairs, looking forward to the potential date. Except he didn't know Ginny had just randomly gotten amnesia, so he walked up to his darling. She was staring at the wall with a dazed expression. Harry thought that dazed expression was really cute so he decided to surprise her with a kiss. He gave her a HUGE, JUICY SMACK on her cheek. Saliva dribbled down her face. She turned and stared at him. He was returned with a SMACK as well. Except this time, it was a slap. Harry stared at her, shocked.

"Who are you and who gave you permission to do that?" demanded Ginny angrily.

"Ginny is something the matter?" inquired Harry with a worried frown. But he didn't really mean it. His face hurt a lot. He wanted to slap her back except that would be like slapping Ron or his mother. So he kept his hands at his sides.

"Who are you? Tell me or I'll Jinx you!" snapped Ginny.

Harry grinned. Of course. Ginny was at her little antics again. He decided to play along.

"I'm Harry Potter the Chosen One of course!" He guffawed, slapping his thighs at his excellent joke.

"Harry Potter? I hate that name! You're a perverted old man at heart aren't you? Even your last name is dirty! You toilet potty Potter!" cried Ginny angrily. She was still grossed out by that juicy kiss he had given her.

Harry laughed uncertainly. This joke was starting to get lame. He hated when people made fun of his name.

"Er… Ginny, I was wondering… d'you wanna go to Hogsmeade with me today?" asked Harry, changing the subject.

"No way!" exclaimed Ginny. His eyes that was as green as a fresh-pickled toad and his hair that was as black as a chalkboard annoyed her. He just wasn't her type. She decided that she preferred small, adorable looking boys with big eyes and high voices. Harry (ew gross name) just did not fit that type.

Harry looked at her in surprise. The joke was starting to annoy him.

"Cut it out Ginny. Come on, let's go," he said in that nicest tone possible. He tried to drag her to her feet. Big mistake. There was a third, louder SMACK, and it wasn't a kiss either. Harry rubbed his doubly sore face, but his face wasn't as sore as his heart was. He had loved Ginny with all his heart and soul, and here she was, playing with him! The horror of it! He felt as though he was getting torn in half like a breadstick, and he was as empty as a Budweiser on New Year's. Everyone had left him. He had no one left in this cold, dark, and cruel world. Despair settled down upon him like dandruff. Harry drooped like a defrosted flower.

"If this is how you want it Ginny," sighed Harry. He half-turned to go, hoping that her voice, like the sweet sound of a broom speeding through air, would call him back and apologize. Then they would kiss and make-up.

"Yes it is! Now leave me alone you freaky lecher! Bloody! I hate guys like you!" hollered Ginny, her formerly cute freckles standing out on her white face like huge blotches. She turned to him, and pulled her wand out. "Leave. Now." She looked him in the eye, threateningly. Harry realized she was not in jest. He nearly dissolved into a puddle of heartbreak. This time, he fully turned around and walked away, his feet shuffling on the floor like a pack of cards and his shoulder hunched over like the bell-ringer of Notre Dame. Utterly wretched!

Ginny however, just sat there and wondered who that loser was. She did not know that he was the object she had so recently idolized and loved. Ginny felt hungry. She got up and left the common room.

Harry was sobbing into Hermione's shoulder next to the Great Lake. Ron sat by looking jealous but he didn't say anything. He was too angry at Ginny. Ginny was dead meat.

"It's alright Harry, it's alright," spoke Hermione, soothingly. Harry's sobs resided, but he was still feeling very sad.

"I don't know what happened," hiccupped Harry, "I just went down to the common room to ask her to go to Hogsmeade with me except she slapped me twice!"

"That scarlet woman!" scowled Ron. He clenched his fists until they turned white. Ginny was his SISTER and she wasn't supposed to do stuff like this! "I'm going to have a talk with her!"

"Ron, don't be so rash. I'll go talk with Ginny and see what's going on," said Hermione. She dumped Harry's tearstained and snot stained face onto Ron's shoulder and got up. She headed back into the castle, leaving Harry in Ron's presence.Harry felt a bit soothed. Ron reminded him of Ginny, except he smelled like skunk underwear. The two best friends sat there and waited for Hemione's return, and possibly, Ginny's.