Chapter Seven - Defenses

Defense training was a relatively simple affair; Hermione looked up new jinxes, curses, hexes, counter curses and protective spells and then they all learned them. Harry was usually the first to pick them up, but Draco was particularly fast at learning the slightly darker spells.

"Draco," Hermimone began tentatively one morning, looking as if she was having second thoughts once all eyes in the room fell on her. "I was thinking…maybe we should learn Avada Kedavra."

"Why are you telling me this?" Draco asked, already knowing and hating the answer.

"Because you already know it, don't you. You should teach us," Hermione pressed.

Harry drew in a sharp breath; he knew it would have to happen, but he was hoping it would be later rather than sooner. He should have known Hermione would beat him to it.

Draco looked at Harry thoughtfully for a moment before answering, and as he spoke, he kept his gaze on Harry.

"I think you're right, Hermione, but I want to know if Harry thinks there's anything else we need to know before we learn it."

Harry was grateful to Draco; he was allowing Harry the opportunity to let Draco know he was not ready without appearing weak to the others. Harry thought carefully about his answer before giving it.

"I'm not sure if there's something we might have overlooked – let's take a couple of days and I'll think about it." Harry said, looking at Draco. To his relief, Draco smiled and nodded.

"You're right, of course. We should wait and see if there's anything we've forgotten or missed."

That night after dinner, Harry and Draco retired to their room early. They were lying in bed, Harry leaning against Draco. One of Draco's arms was draped casually around Harry's torso.

"Harry, are you ok? You're being very quiet," Draco said, running his free hand through Harry's hair as Harry snuggled back against his chest.

"I'm f-"

"Don't lie to me, Potter," Draco growled causing Harry to tense.

"I'm just worried."

"About what? Learning the killing curse?"

"Not really. Just about… what's to come. It'll happen sooner than later, you know. Either Voldemort or I will be dead before I turn eighteen."

"Soon after Christmas, I would think," Draco said conversationally. Harry stiffened.

"You're not helping."

"Harry, I know you're going to win," Draco said sincerely.

"How can you be so sure?"

"I don't know how I can be sure, but I am. It's just… a feeling I have."

"Well, I'm glad someone believes in me," Harry said softly.

Draco tightened his hold on Harry and pressed a soft kiss to the back of his neck. "Everyone believes in you. Even the Death Eaters are worried."

Death-training

"Potter, stop being such a wimp! You can do this. It's only a fly!" Draco snapped, as yet another fly flew past Harry without a scratch inflicted on it. Hermione caught it with a well-placed stunning charm and dropped it into a jar.

"If it's only a fly, how do we know we'll be able to do it on Death Eaters?" Ron grumbled.

"Because you'll know it's either them or you!" Draco shouted, rounding on Ron. "And stop stunning them, Hermione, you should be practising killing them!"

"You know," Harry said in the deathly calm voice that he seemed to reserve for those times that he was extraordinarily angry, "I don't think I want to continue working when people are going to shout at me for trying my hardest." Draco shivered at the tone of his voice. Hermione immediately rushed to the rescue.

"Let's have an early lunch break, and have another go once we've all been fed, shall we?" She suggested, "I know Ron can't work on an empty stomach, and I get really grumpy when I'm hungry," she said, cleverly avoiding reference to either Draco or Harry's tempers.

Harry nodded stiffly, leading the way from the room in silence. Ron and Hermione followed in equal silence, leaving Draco to boil in his own rage.

He stood still, trying to calm himself, and forced his anger down. He would expel it later, by other means. Maybe he could conjure one of those muggle punching bags. At least, he knew there would be no sex that night, so he'd better find some other way of getting rid of all his negative energy.

As they all sat down to lunch, Hermione busied herself at the sink, preparing drinks for everyone and taking the opportunity to slip a few drops of relaxing potion into everyone's glass.

Harry felt the tension ebbing away from him as he sipped his drink, and immediately cast a suspicious glance at Hermione. She merely smiled secretively, and Harry shook his head, grinning. He was glad someone thought of these sorts of things. Fortunately, Ron and Draco were too busy glaring each other down to notice the silent exchange.

"Well, I certainly feel better after that meal. Great idea, Hermione," Harry said loudly, interrupting the death stare match going on between his best friend and his boyfriend.

"FOR MERLIN'S SAKE!" Draco shouted at Harry, "YOU HAVE TO MEAN IT!"

Harry's eyes darkened with rage; he was suddenly miles away, back at the Ministry in the Atrium the day that Sirius had fallen through the veil.

"You have to mean it." Bellatrix Lestrange had taunted him with those words. Bellatrix, who had killed Harry's godfather, and tortured Neville's parents into insanity, had then tried to kill Harry, taking great pleasure in making him angry.

"Avada Kedavra," Harry growled, pointing his wand at Bellatrix who suddenly morphed into a fly that was zooming towards him. There was a flash of green light, and the fly fell to the ground, dead.

"Finally!" Draco said loudly, "About time, Potter. The others mastered it before you did. What were you thinking about?"

Harry looked at Draco, allowing him to see the rage still contained within his memory. The word he wanted to say was on the tip of his tongue – the word that would make him feel better about some of the pain and frustration he had felt recently. He let it go.

"You," Harry said coldly, leaving the room swiftly for the back garden.

Hermione and Ron stared after Harry, shocked. Hermione shifted her gaze from the hallway to Draco, who was standing stiffly and had a shocked expression on his face that looked as though he had just been slapped in the face. Gradually, that expression changed and Draco's whole body seemed to droop as his face showed his pain.

Suddenly he seemed to come to himself, and left the room as quickly as Harry had, not looking at either Ron or Hermione.

Draco, upon leaving the room, had initially intended to go to his room and wait for Harry to come and apologise, but he quickly changed his mind on realising that he could be waiting all day. It would be faster to find him and make it happen. Now.

Draco guessed correctly that Harry would be sitting on the stone bench in the garden. He was facing away from him and showed no sign of hearing Draco enter the garden, so Draco was momentarily stunned when Harry spoke.

"You found me," he said tonelessly.

"I found you," Draco said, "first guess," he added, smiling despite himself.

"What are we doing, Draco?"

"I don't know," Draco admitted, coming to sit on the bench next to Harry.

"How is this going to work? We can't stand each other."

"That's not true. I can stand you. I can stand a lot of you," Draco said. Harry said nothing, but looked at Draco for the first time. His look was one of disbelief.

"How did you know I was here?" Draco asked, choosing to ignore Harry's blatant disbelief. Obviously he was not ready to face the truth.

"My wandless magic told me. It recognises your magic's aura."

"Why does it do that?"

"Because I want it to, I imagine."

"Why?"

"I don't know. To know when you're around, and to know how you're feeling and if you're safe."

"That's pretty advanced sounding."

Harry ignored this last comment, choosing instead to address what he considered to be the important issue.

"I lied."

Draco knew immediately what he was talking about and nodded, to show he understood. "Why?" He asked, afraid of the answer.

"To cause you pain."

"But why?" Draco asked, feeling suffocated.

"Because you were yelling at me. Because you were pissing me off. Because I wanted you to feel some of what I felt when you were treating me like dirt."

"I'm sorry," Draco whispered, bowing his head to hide his tears.

"Me too," Harry said, resting his head on Draco's shoulder.

Draco felt wetness on his shoulder and laughed softly. "Look what we do to each other," he said, lifting his head and shrugging his shoulder to make Harry look at him.

"How can we possibly make this work?" Harry wondered, gazing searchingly at Draco.

"We will make this work, because I want it to."

"I do too."