Kamio scanned through his notes, a transcript of a text meeting between himself and Marui. Marui transmitted his notes from the previous night's scouting to all concerned parties and, while they were thorough, they were…boring. Momo was never going to leave Tachibana-san's sister alone if Echizen didn't do something. An was getting uppity about her "Momoshiro-kun" and it was putting Kippei in Ultra-Brother Mode. If Kippei was in Ultra-Brother Mode, he wasn't in Notice Kamio Mode.

The Shirt Project didn't work, so another plan needed to be formed, and quickly. Kamio paced in the Fudomine changing room. Echizen and Momo would be going to the street courts today for sure. That gave Kamio two hours to think of something. Marui was doing doubles training tonight, so he wouldn't be able to go, and Jirou was "busy" with "things." Kikumaru was also "busy" with "things." That was fine, Kamio could do it himself…so long as Ibu-kun was free.

&-&

There was an Inui-blockade locking Momo into the Regulars clubhouse. The Inui-blockade was holding a notebook and tapping it against his folded arms. "Ah, Inui-senpai…can I help you?" Momo took a few steps away from Inui. Inui kept Inui Juice in his locker. There was a biohazard sticker on the thermos.

Inui adjusted his glasses and opened his notebook. "According to my data, you are going to argue with Kaidoh today." Inui looked up from his book and the light glinted off his glasses. Momo took another step back, his calves brushing against a changing bench. "However, I've come to request that you avoid fighting with Kaidoh. It will be detrimental to my plans."

Momo stood tall in the face of juice-death. "I only fight because he starts it," Momo argued. It was true, too. The Mamushi was always glaring or hissing things to rile Momo up. The Mamushi's very existence was created to go against everything that Momo stood for. Kaidoh could also bench press more than Momo, which was embarrassing and something Momo was going to change as soon as Inui-senpai moved and let him get to the weight room.

"My data says otherwise." Inui adjusted his glasses and sat down on the bench, gesturing for Momoshiro to do so as well.

Momoshiro sat, but did so as far from Inui as manners would allow. "No offense, senpai, but you get distracted sometimes, so I wouldn't trust that data too much."

Inui flipped the pages in his notebook. "When Kaidoh is present, 40 percent of my attention is diverted to the fluctuations of his shirt, particularly while he's practicing his Snake. 20 percent of my attention is focused on his shorts. They ride up 59 percent more than they should. I am endeavoring to find a length that will allow for optimal movement but maximum coverage. I cannot do this without more data." Momo didn't believe it, but let Inui continue. "10 percent of my attention is on Kaidoh's opponent. The other 20 percent of my attention is focused on watching you." Inui turned the page. "When Kaidoh is present, 50 percent of your attention is on his shirt and the fluctuations thereof. 20 percent of your attention is on his shorts." Inui looked up and Momo wanted to crawl into his locker. "The shorts will be fixed by the end of the month." Inui looked back to his notebook. "The remainder of your attention is on Echizen." Inui closed his book and set it on his lap. "I would like to discuss those first two figures with you."

&-&

Momo-senpai was being quiet, too quiet. Usually he was blabbering on about a new burger topping he wanted to try, but today he just walked with Echizen to the street courts, his gaze straight ahead, his hands holding tight to the handlebars of his bike. Momo opted to walk the bike today instead of having Echizen ride with him, as was the custom.

Echizen sighed. Conversation was not his strong point, but the silence was annoying. "What did Inui-senpai want?"

Momo stopped walking and stared at the ground. "He – he wanted me to stay away from Mamushi. He thinks I have a crush on him." Momo's nose scrunched up and his eyebrows moved down. It was weird but (Echizen could now admit these things about Momo and not feel too sick) cute.

"Don't you?" It came out in Echizen's usual, bored tone, for which the freshman was grateful. He didn't want to sound desperate or needy. He didn't want to sound like Tomoka.

"No!" Momo continued walking, though his look was still far away. "Why does everyone think that?"

"You watch his ass all the time."

"I do not!" Momo began to walk faster. The bent spoke on the bike's tire started to make a crick-crick sound against the bike frame. "He just wears those stupid shorts that keep riding up. He might as well not be wearing anything at all."

"Momo-senpai, your nose is bleeding." Echizen handed Momo a handkerchief and continued toward the street courts. If Momo-senpai wanted to deny the fact that he had a crush on Kaidoh-senpai, Echizen wasn't going to stop him. It still didn't change the fact that Momo was always watching Kaidoh, yelling at Kaidoh, talking about Kaidoh, and chose, more often than not, to warm up with Kaidoh when Inui-senpai was busy with manager things. Echizen beat Kaidoh, so he couldn't see what all the fuss was about. Sure Kaidoh was taller and had more muscle and less clothing, but Echizen was better at tennis than Kaidoh, so that should shut out those other factors.

Emotions sucked. Tennis was much better. Echizen picked up his pace. The street courts were just ahead.

&-&

"I don't understand why Kamio had to bring me along." Serve. "Why didn't he make Ishida do this? Ishida wouldn't mind. Sakurai might get mad, but it would be better than playing against all of these low-level players." Topspin. "Kamio's just doing this so he can get on Tachibana's good side. Normal people would tell someone they have a crush on them, not sneak around and get their teammates involved in stupid love plots that will never work." Drop shot. "Forty-love." Serve. "Why aren't they here yet? I have homework to do. Morimoto-sensei gave us too much to read this week. Economics texts shouldn't be so long. Why do we need to study economics if we want to play tennis?" Slice. "Kamio isn't even playing, he's just standing at the baseline, waiting for them to get here. They probably won't show up." Topspin. "I wanted to watch TV today. There's a program on sharks tonight and now I'm going to miss it because Kamio wants to play matchmaker for Seigaku." Slice, a little harder this time. "I hate Seigaku. They don't know what it's like to work hard for a goal. Everything's so easy for them." Topspin. "We'll show them at nationals. We'll defeat them and it will be Seigaku's turn to feel disappointment." There, the muscle twitched. "Just watch Seigaku, Fudomine will show you true strength." Blink. "Game, Ibu-Ka…" Blink. Kamio was gone "Game. Ibu Shinji."

&-&

"Hoi, Momoshiro!" Kamio ran up to Momo, smiling. "Shinji and I are bored. Come play some doubles with us."

Momo did not want to play doubles against Shinji and Kamio. Shinji and Kamio were good at doubles, he and Echizen…well, they weren't. "We're just going to practice a little. We're not looking for a real game."

"Come on," Kamio tugged at Momo's arm. "You can be on my team and Shinji can be on Echizen's. It'll be good practice."

Momo was going to argue, but Echizen was already walking toward Ibu. Oh well, one game wouldn't hurt. "Eh, sure."

"Great, let's go!" Momo's arm was nearly wrenched out of place as Kamio dashed off, still with a firm hold on Momo.

&-&

"The only reason I'm playing with you is because Kamio asked me to and he bought me lunch last week when I left my wallet at home. Please don't think that I actually want to play doubles with you. I don't even like doubles. I play singles, singles two. It's my spot. I noticed you were an alternate in the Hyoutei match. How sad. I suppose when you have senpai like yours it's inevitable."

"Shut up." Echizen was tired of listening to Ibu go on and on about stupid things. "I was an alternate because Buchou didn't want me to get hurt playing Kabaji." Ibu had a wonderful habit of finding Echizen's sorest points and talking about them, at great length, in front of everyone. "Let's hurry up and beat them so we can go home."

&-&

In the end, Ibu and Echizen won. They looked really good together, really harmonized. It made Momo feel a little bit bitter. Of course, Ibu and Echizen were both really good, so it wasn't impossible for them to play well as a doubles team. It was just a little disappointing, that was all.

"Momoshiro, telephone!"

Momo picked up the extension in his room, answering with a less than enthusiastic, "Hai."

"Momo, it's Inui." Great, another death threat. "I've been tabulating my data for the day and, given the information I gleaned from your match today, I am eighty-four percent certain that Echizen has developed a deep emotional attachment to you."

"What?" Inui was at the street courts? Where?

Inui sighed over the phone. "Echizen has a crush on you." Momo heard some mumbling and typing in the background. Inui was no doubt logging Momo's reactions. "It would be in your best interests to pursue a date with him. He will not decline your offer and there is a fifty-two percent chance that you reciprocate his feelings, despite your infatuation with Kaidoh." Did Inui-senpai just growl? "Goodnight Momoshiro."

The dial tone was blaring in time with Momo's racetrack heart. Surely Inui was lying to keep Momo away from Kaidoh, even though Momo was not, in any way, shape, or form attracted to Kaidoh. That would be gross. Dating Echizen would also be gross. Echizen was young (only a year, but that was a lot mentally, or so Momo's older sister said) and his father was crazy and Echizen wasn't into lovey stuff, just tennis. Tennis, while really fun, made for bad dates. Inui-senpai was probably just looking at his data after drinking too much juice. Momo decided to pretend the day never happened.

&-&

Kikumaru was not pleased. He left the operation alone for one day and no progress was made. Momo and Echizen were standing further from eachother than ever before.

"Eiji." Oishi's hand landed on Kikumaru's shoulder and the redhead instinctively reclined back before realizing that he was in the middle of practice.

"Oishi, practice isn't fun today." Kikumaru scooted a bit away from his doubles partner – Oishi wanted to look professional now that he was Tezuka's replacement – but turned to stare into Oishi's eyes. Oishi would know what to do, but Oishi never approved of Kikumaru's plans, even when they were really brilliant and would help people. Oishi didn't believe in interfering.

"Are you feeling okay?" Oishi moved forward and draped a hand across Kikumaru's forehead.

"Momo and Echizen are fighting. Look." Kikumaru pointed to the two kouhai.

"Do you know why?" Oishi moved to stand behind Kikumaru.

"Nuh-uh. They were fine yesterday, but today they're not talking or looking at eachother or yelling or anything." Eiji exhaled and tried to calm down. The hand that Oishi was running up and down Kikumaru's lower back was not helping in the effort to ease Eiji's heart rate.

"Mom invited you over for dinner tonight, to repay you for having me yesterday." Oishi's words were soft and low, a whisper that slid through Kikumaru's skin and settled in his stomach in small whirls and eddies.

Kikumaru bit his lip. He should meet with the others tonight. There were several things that needed to be flushed out if their plan was to bear fruit. On the other hand, it was rare that Kikumaru got to eat dinner with Oishi's family. "What time?" Maybe he could phone Marui-kun and they could arrange a meeting later.

"Seven." Oishi's hand continued to run along Kikumaru's back. Eiji's legs were beginning to feel a little wobbly.

Kikumaru's phone rang. He'd meant to turn it off for practice, but he sometimes accidentally forgot. Oishi wouldn't punish him too badly for it, not like Buchou would. With a shaky hand he checked the caller ID. It was "Tensai-san." Oishi's hand was still in motion, but Kikumaru had to take the call. "Hey!" He answered as excitedly as he could. Oishi's hand didn't cease its movements.

"I've learned that Inui is the one messing everything up. I arranged for Echizen and Momo's phones to be tapped, and I recorded Inui calling Echizen and Momo last night. Jirou and I are going to examine the tapes and form a counter plan tonight. Kamio's busy stalking Tachibana. You in?"

Eiji couldn't breathe properly. Oishi was scratching the spot, the one that sent electricity up Kikumaru's spine and turned him into one big, fuzzy, purring ball of happy. "Busy," he managed, unconsciously moving back, closer to Oishi. "I'll call you tomorrow, bye." Eiji snapped his phone shut and dropped it into his pocket. "Oishiiii, people can see!"

Oishi laughed but pulled back a little. "They don't see anything but you trying to snuggle with me, and that's nothing new." Oishi gave Eiji's rear a soft pat and walked toward the courts, grinning. "Come on, practice time. I take it you freed your schedule up for tonight?"

Kikumaru, who believed himself long past the blushing phase, lit up like a hormonal bonfire. "Yeah, but I'm really busy tomorrow, so no more cheating!" Marui and Jirou could handle the Inui Intrusion. They were smart-types. Kikumaru would handle Oishi and get back to helping Momo and Echizen in the morning.

"Oh, Eiji? That's twenty laps for the phone." Oishi waved over his shoulder, his fukubuchou mask solidly in place.

Kikumaru whined, but started running. He'd make Oishi pay for the laps later.