/PR timeline- Tommy is the Green Ranger; they have not yet gained their Ninjetti powers. Some playing around with the continuum. Rocky, Aisha and Adam will already have transferred from Stone Canyon.

A/N: This idea wouldn't leave me alone. I wondered what would happen if the gang got an assignment to write about how drunk driving had affected them. I'm going on the idea that Rachel Cranston was killed by a drunk driver while out with Billy when he was nine.

Billy still isn't over it in some senses but maybe the assignment can help him work out his issues.

Rated: PG-13 to R for themes, violence and language throughout. No pairings as of yet...and this will be a little darker than my usual work.

Feedback at: is welcome.

The Assignment.. continued.

Lance and William Cranston were quiet by nature. Lance was never one to be loud or boisterous. His son William was quiet as a means of survival. They sat quietly at their window booth at Maggiano's as they contemplated each other. Lance wondered what was running through his son's mind after their annual visit to Rachel's grave.

Billy toyed with his water glass as he silently wished his father would stop his scrutiny and say something. "Dad, please stop staring at me. It's making me uncomfortable." Billy said as he fidgeted with his glass.

Lance looked at Billy for a moment before he complied with his son's request. "Sorry. I'm just worried about you. That crying jag in the car and the assignment you told me about has me concerned. I know how hard it is for you at this time of year."

Billy held up a hand to forestall his father's comments. "Dad, I'd prefer to deal with the assignment on my own. Time is the only cure for my other issues, I appreciate your concern but I'd rather deal with it myself for now." Billy looked down at the glass in front of him as if it had offended him somehow.

Lance let Billy brood. When he clammed up and got that expression on his face it was best to leave him be. They finished their meal in silence and went home, neither man spoke until they arrived and Billy went straight to his room. "Goodnight father." was all Billy said as he closed his door and locked it.

Billy looked at his computer, considered turning it on but decided against it. He knew if he turned it on, he would sit there all night attempting that damn essay. He just didn't have the emotional where withal to deal with opening up his heart on paper. He decided to take a warm shower and crash. Maybe if he woke up with a clear head, he could tackle it.

Everyone had turned in for the night with thoughts of the assignment on their minds as well as their friend who had been touched so deeply by the recklessness of another. The next morning went well for Billy until lunch. He found himself flanked by Jason and Kim on one side, Trini, and Zack on the other side.

Billy inwardly sighed as he felt the tension around his friends. He knew they were concerned after his abrupt departure the day before. He also knew they could push his buttons without meaning to when it came to emotional issues. He hoped he could contain it, as usual without loosing his calm façade.

"Uh hi guys, why am I being surrounded? I am perfectly capable of walking to our usual locale for eating under my own power." Billy said as he sat down uneasily; he felt like what he imagined one of his lab specimens must feel like under his scrutiny. He waited for someone to do or say something before the tension made him snap.

Kim noticed his uneasiness and put her hand on his knee to calm him. She knew his moods pretty well, and could sense he was getting ready to bolt if the tension didn't ease up in point-five seconds or less.

"Billy, relax. We just wanted to see how you're doing today, that's all. After you left suddenly we were just concerned about you and how you were dealing with the assignment we got in class." At the mention of the dreaded assignment, Billy's expression went vacant for a moment, and then he composed himself before he responded to Kim.

"Kim, please do not mention that essay to me. I am not sure I will even do the assignment, if you remember Ms. Applebee will allow me to forgo the essay. I may just do that if I can't bring myself to write it. Now, if you all will excuse me, I'd prefer to be alone." Billy stood to leave but Jason put his hand on Billy's shoulder to stop him from bolting from everyone.

Billy looked up at Jason's hand on his shoulder with an expression akin to shock, which shifted to barely concealed anger in a heartbeat. When Billy looked up to Jason, something in his expression led Jason to release his grip on Billy.

"Billy, Kim was only worried. We don't want you to leave and we're sorry that we upset you." Jason offered as he stood his ground but left his hands at his side. Billy kept his gaze locked on Jason as he spoke in a tone that was probably a bit harsh for the unintended slight Kim or Jason had committed out of concern for him.

"Jason, I'm aware of the fact that Kim spoke up because she is concerned about me, as are all of you. However, I do not need to be babied, watched, or corralled into a safety net of my friends. Nor do I need or want anyone to check up on my emotional well-being every time I get "upset". Billy made the air quotes as he spoke to them.

Billy turned and poked Jason in the chest before he continued to speak. "You know how badly I dealt with my loss. You of all people know how deeply I was affected and still are." He stepped back and glanced at everyone else who was assembled. A hint of sadness and anger in his eyes while he spoke. "As my friends I ask you to let me cope with the assignment on my own terms. Now, if you don't mind I really do need to be alone now. I'll be in touch later." Having finished his rant, Billy stalked off from his friends, toward the library where he could have some peace and quiet. He slowed down as he barely avoided a collision with Tommy who let him pass with no questions asked.

Tommy he made his way toward the cafeteria as he wondered what set Billy off to the point he was rude to him. Billy had passed him without so much as an "excuse me" or "hi". As he entered the cafeteria, Tommy spotted the others; as he joined them he noticed Kim was trying to hold back tears and Jason talking quietly with Zack. Tommy slipped an arm around Kim to comfort her while he asked what had happened with Billy.

"What's wrong with Billy? He passed me by without as much as a hello or go to hell. He looked really pissed off." Tommy said as he nibbled on a roll and waited for an answer.

Trini looked over to their newest teammate, and sighed inwardly at how she could explain the situation without letting her irritation at Billy show through.

"It seems as if our attempt to let Billy know we're worried back fired. He's so hard to read emotionally. We thought if we showed him we're concerned it would help but it only seemed to irritate him. I have a feeling his father may have done something similar yesterday, and it just seemed like more of the same to Billy.

I'll call him later, maybe he'll be in the mood to talk or at least listen to me. Kim, you know he would never upset you like this intentionally, he's emotionally damaged and we need to be remember that." Trini said as she gathered her things and left for her next class.

Kim watched Trini exit the cafeteria as her words sunk in. ".he's emotionally damaged." those words rang through her head as she allowed Tommy to help her. No one else spoke as everyone dispersed toward his or her respective classes.

Billy had retreated to a far corner of the library with his laptop and a set of headphones so he could focus on his work. He noticed Tommy out of the corner of his eye; he hoped his newest friend would have the good grace to leave him alone. He had passed Tommy up without as much as a "hello" or "'scuse' me" earlier in the hall. Fortunately, the other boy kept his distance and allowed Billy his privacy.

Tommy made a mental note to speak with Jason after school about Billy. He was worried about his friend, especially since he pushed them all away. Tommy sat back and studied both American History from 1800 and Billy while he made mental notes as he observed.

Billy was off in his own world as he pondered how to begin the essay. He had put on his headphones, found something that would get him relaxed and let the laptop run iTunes as he stared at the blinking cursor in frustration. Finally, he started to type.

Shattered, an essay by William A. Cranston

My life was irrevocably altered nine years ago when a car operated by
an inebriated driver collided with the car my mother and I were in. I
barely survived, while my mother died en route to the hospital. That
day, my life was over. Almost in the literal sense but in the
metaphorical and spiritual sense. A part of me died with my mother, as
did a significant part of my father's heart and soul.

I survived the wreck thanks to being buckled in as well as not being
on the side of the vehicle that took the impact of the collision. My
mother was not so lucky, as she absorbed the brunt of the impact, and
lost significant amounts of blood as they worked to free her from the
wreck of our vehicle.

I was still conscious as she started to slip away into death. For a
nine-year-old boy cursed with my intellect it was pure hell to see her
suffer as she did while they worked to get us out. I knew on an
intellectual level what had happened, and that she was in shock from
her injuries. Some detached part of me understood that she would not
survive without a miracle or on the spot blood transfusion, while the
child that I was started to cry out for his mother.

Billy stopped typing and reread his words on the LCD screen. Something wasn't right to him; it was as if he was merely telling what happened with little to no emotional sense of what he really felt at the time. He knew that if he were going to do the essay he would have to dig deep into places he would rather leave shuttered and locked in his heart.

He rubbed a hand over his face as he considered deleting what he had written; Billy noticed a trail of moisture on his cheek. 'Damn, I knew this would get to me, but I can't sit here in the library crying like a child. If I can't even write a rough draft without tearing up, how can I do the assignment?' Billy thought as he stopped with his hand over the 'delete' key. Instead, he saved it to his document folder and shut down his laptop.

Billy thought about his friends as he packed his case and headed to his last class for the day. 'I'll work on it later, at home. I should find the others and apologize for how I spoke to Kim and Jason.' Billy stopped by where Tommy was reading and stood next to him. Tommy glanced up at Billy and smiled before closing his book and getting up. He indicated that Billy should come with him as they exited the library.

Billy waited until they had cleared the library's entrance and found a spot to sit down. He looked at Tommy as he spoke quietly. "Tommy, I'm sorry for the way I brushed past you earlier. I was upset to say the least. I also apologize for making Kimberly upset. I did not intend for her to be wounded by my ill-placed anger earlier. Do you know where I can find her so that I may make amends?"

Tommy looked at Billy, quirked a smile at him before he spoke. "It's ok Billy. I can understand how our friends can be a little overbearing with good intent. I'm sure Kim understood you didn't mean to upset her. They were only concerned. As to where to find Kim and the others---if everyone has finished with class for the day they should be getting ready to head to the Youth Centre. Why don't you come with us?" Tommy asked as he stood, shouldered his bag and began to make his way to the main entrance of the school.

Billy sighed inwardly. He really didn't want to see all of his friends. He felt bad about how he had acted earlier as well as not being in the mood to hang out. "Sure, at least I can apologize for my rudeness earlier. I may not join you at the Centre, as I have copious amounts of school work to finish by this weekend." Billy said as he followed Tommy to the entrance to see everyone gathered as usual.

Everyone looked up to find their resident genius as he sullenly followed Tommy to where they stood. Billy went to Kim and gave her a brief, hard hug. He knew he had upset her with his harsh tone, as well as his abrupt departure.

"Kim, I apologize for my rudeness earlier. I had no malice intent, and I certainly did not mean to make you upset. Jason, I owe you an apology as well. Please forgive my transgression against you earlier." Billy said as the group started to walk toward the Centre.

Kim slipped an arm through Billy's as they walked. She knew he would bolt and head home if given the opportunity. "It's ok Billy. We should have been more sensitive to your feelings as well. I have to remember that you deal with things alone sometimes. I promise to be better about recognizing the way you are dealing with things in the future." Kim walked with her arm looped in Billy's as he looked ahead and mulled over what she said.

"Kim, thank you for that. I know it's not always the best thing to cope with matters alone but sometimes I need to do that before I can finally ask for assistance. I'm afraid I have offended my father as well when he only was concerned for my emotional well being."

Kim stopped and hugged Billy in a fierce way that was meant to reinforce how much she cared for him as a friend. Jason expected Billy to stiffen and try to pull away; instead, Billy sank into the embrace as if he was drowning. The last couple of days had taken a toll on him whether he wanted to admit it or not. Kim's simple act of a hug broke down his defenses as he held her and fought the onslaught of tears that threatened to spill over.

Kim felt the suppressed sobs that Billy held in check while he held onto her for the longest time. Some part of his mind screamed at him to let go of Kim before Tommy decked him, but he shut that part down. Tommy wasn't like that it, and Billy closed his eyes and let his head rest on Kim's shoulder. She whispered in his ear to assure him it was ok to hold on.

"Billy you can cry if you need to. No one will judge you if you do. We understand, if you want we can go somewhere and talk.only if you want to that is."

Billy loosened his grip to respond to her. "Can we go somewhere and talk I don't think I can do this anymore Kim." Billy pulled back a little as he stared at Kim. She saw the tears standing in his eyes and nodded, then started to pull him off toward their spot in the park. Kim shook her head "no" when the others started to follow them.

Billy smiled thinly and told her it was ok, he needed all of them there. The group solemnly went to the bench that was so far into the park it seemed part of the forest and not the park. Billy sunk onto the grass like someone had taken all of the fight out of him, while Kim sat in front of him in arm's reach in case Billy reached out to her.

No one said anything while they assembled and Billy stared a hole in the ground. He didn't mean to unload like this, but he knew if he kept it inside he was gonna blow his top at the wrong person. In a movement that surprised Kim and himself, Billy pulled Kim into a hug and finally let go of the tears that had sprung up. He felt Trini and eventually everyone there gather into a group around him while he let go of the emotions that were running amok in his heart and head.

Once he finished crying, he raised his head from Kim's shoulder and looked up at everyone. He felt childish for the display but he also felt much better since he had let that out of his system. He wiped at Kim's shoulder as he attempted to dry her off. "Forgive me Kim, I didn't mean to soak you like that. I just needed to get that out." Kim smiled and kissed Billy on the cheek as she remained in his embrace.

"I know Billy. There is nothing to forgive my friend. I'll dry off for the next time you need me."

There was nothing between them, only brotherly and sisterly love for a long time friend. He wrapped his arms around her and finally relaxed with his friends nearby. Kim stayed put as Billy started to finally speak.

"Thank you for being here now. I couldn't take the emotional duress any longer. Tommy forgive my appropriation of Kim, but her hug was something I needed, apparently a lot more than I realized as well as her touch now. I, I don't know where to start, but I'll try. This essay has brought up a lot of bad memories for me, some things I had worked through in counseling. Some things are painful and disturbing to me still.

I started the essay earlier, but when I read what I had written it seemed like I was merely describing the incident with no emotion. It seems that I can't attach what I felt to the event any longer. I know what I felt then and how I still feel now, but I can't put it into words for some reason.

I know this will not be easy, but I don't want to give up without trying to do the assignment. I know I hold things in, this being the biggest emotional issue I have, all I guess I'm asking now is that you support me. I know I can be exceedingly stubborn and willful when it comes to things like this, but I need to learn to deal with it not just hide from it."

Jason, Zack and Trini watched Billy as he spoke, since him opening up was as rare as a blue moon. Jason had been there when Billy came home from the hospital, and he knew how Billy had taken the death of his mother. How deeply the pain still ran in the young man's heart.

No one but Jason knew how depressed Billy would become on her birthday, or mother's day for the first few years after her death. Jason had an idea to help Billy with the essay as well as a way for them to support him. He spoke up as Billy lapsed into silence once more.

"Billy, I know this is hard for you, I really do. If you would allow it, I think it would be a good idea for those of us who could write on how this has effected our friend and in turn affected us. I ask your permission to do that Billy."

Tommy, Rocky, Adam and Aisha were quietly mulling over how they could help their friend. They hadn't been in his life when he lost his mother, so they didn't know if it would be appropriate for them to follow along with Jason's idea. Adam looked over to where Billy and Kim were still entwined as Billy mulled over Jason's offer.

"If you desire to do so Jason, I have no problems with that. I only ask that you keep certain things out of your essay. There are some things I need to mention as well as work through for myself. I appreciate the offer more than you can ever know." Billy finally released Kim as he stretched out his legs so they could wake up. "Sorry Kim, but my appendages have decided to go to sleep." Billy stood up and stretched while Kim scooted over a bit.

Billy sat on the bench next to Trini, who wrapped an arm around him for support. They all were quiet for moments until Rocky spoke up. "Billy, I know we haven't known you as long but if there is a way we can support you please let us know. My father was killed by a drunken driver so I understand to a degree what you went through."

Billy looked at Rocky for a long moment, and then gave him a thin smile that never reached his eyes. "Gracias Rocky. If I can be of any help to you please let me know. Billy glanced at his watch and grimaced slightly. "As much as I am enjoying this I must depart for home. My dad wanted to talk to me, more than likely about my less than stellar attitude yesterday evening. Thank you for this, I needed it more than I care to admit to." Billy stood and started to leave, after he gave Trini a brief, hard hug.

Jason picked up his bag and dashed off after Billy, he wanted to talk to him about how he was coping. Not merely with the assignment, but with the depression Jason knew overtook Billy on occasion. "Billy, wait up I'll walk with you."

Billy halted his progress enough for Jason to join him. He figured that Jason wanted to speak with him, after all his IQ did start with a "2". The two young men fell into step as they headed back toward their homes. Jason didn't want to just come out and ask if he was ok, especially after the fiasco in school earlier.

"Bill, are you ok with me being brutally honest in my essay?" Jason queried as they walked slowly down the street.

Billy gazed ahead as they walked, he knew that Jason was taking the long way around a short road. "Jase, I'm ok with you being brutally honest with how this has affected you. I was referring to the depression I find myself sinking into on occasion. If its mentioned I'd prefer to speak on it rather than you. Even though you have first hand knowledge of how bad it was and still is on occasion for me, I'd prefer to address that personally."

Billy stopped and looked Jason dead in the eye as he spoke. "Jase, I am grateful to you for everything you have ever done to help me deal with mom's death. I owe you a debt of the soul I can never hope to repay. I love you like the brother I don't have. Right now I am terrified, slightly depressed, anxious and confused. All of the emotions I felt when it happened have resurfaced and yes I may become really depressed again. All I ask is that you be there like always, because I have a feeling I'll need you Jase. You have always been my strength in times of need and dammit I'm in need now. I may need to you once I am done talking to my father."

Billy started to walk, uneasy at how much he had admitted to Jason. He knew Jase cared for him as a brother and would do anything. It was hard for Billy to ask for help, exceedingly hard to ask for someone with his intellect.

Jason fell back into step with Billy as he pondered what Billy had said to him. He knew Billy hated to ask for help, especially with emotional issues. He looked up as they arrived at Billy's home, he smiled and gave Billy's shoulder a squeeze before he spoke. "Bill, you never need to ask to call me. Just do it and I'll be there for you. I love you as my little bro'. I'll always be there for you."

Billy smiled, unable to respond verbally for the moment. Jase understood as he walked off. Emotional closeness was hard for his best friend, but he was getting better at it. Billy walked in to the house, fully expecting a dressing down for the way he acted the night before.

"Dad, I'm home."

AN: Ok, it took me forever to update. But more to come.. Jason and Kim's essays.. more from Billy's essay as he tries to convey his feelings.

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