Incomplete ch3Dillon's Diary
Dear Diary,
Today has been a day like no other. The police found Lara today, up at the Wyvern Industrial Estate, in an unused Warehouse. It was horrible, seeing her there like that. She was being surprisingly positive, even joking in the ambulance, before she lost consciousness. I am writing this from outside theatre, waiting for her to come out. I've been here for what seems like forever, but it's only been here really for 3 hours, but it seemed like it's been a lot longer.
like I said, she was being surprisingly positive, given the circumstances, but later she had literally convinced herself that she was going to die. But she never lost it, never got upset. It was horrible, seeing her suffer like that, and I hope that whoever did this will be brought to justice. To tell you the truth I was really proud of her, proud to be her boyfriend. People kept saying to me that I had to be strong, for Lara . What I really admired about her was her courage, the way she stayed positive, and the way she refused to let this affect her.
I can't wait to see her again. To see her beautiful face once more. She's purely amazing, she's the best human being that i'm ever likely to know. She's a spectacular person. People keep telling me how lucky I am to have her, and I've never doubted it for a second. The wait is agonising, I just want to know if she's going to be ok I don't know what I'll do if I'd lose her but She'll pull through, because I know that deep down she's a toughie. She is a real soldier, carrying on through everything.
I was thinking of proposing to her on her birthday; I had to "borrow" on of her rings to make sure that I had the right size. She never noticed, so it was relatively easy. The ring is beautiful; it's gold with a small diamond in the middle, with rubys around the outside. She hasn't seen it it yet, as I want it to be a surprise. She'll love it, I know she will. She wouldn't want me to dwell to much on the past; so I have to remain positive, and think about the future;our future. They've told me that Lara's expecting, it's a miracle that it's survived this at all, what with everything that went on. They've also told me that there is a strong chance that Lara might miscarry as a result of the anaesthetic. I'm trying not to think about it, and take it as it comes. I don't know what I'm going to say to her when she comes round, if she comes round. These doctors are fantastic; they can perform miracles. If she keeps the baby, then It'll be a dream come true. Lara's got a strong maternal instinct; she's great with the kids at work, so compassionate, doing everything possible for them. We've also talked about the possibility of kids in the future; we've had endless long conversations about the subject. Lara's really keen, she'd be a fantstic mum. But like I've mentioned before; we're going to take each day as it comes.
It's her birthday soon; or 2 months,3 weeks and 5 days to be exact. She'll be 31, and to be honest, she doesn't look a day over 18. How she does it I don't know; but she's the most beautiful woman I've ever met. She's my first, my last and my everything. She has a habit of watching Bridget Jones' Diary over and over again; it's her way of relaxing after a hard day. She sings to all the songs, especially when she's a bit tipsy, sometimes she'll even sing in the shower. I don't think anyones told her that she's tone deaf though, but I don't care. For as long as she's happy I'm happy. And that's the way It's going to stay. What I find that really annoys me is people constantly coming up to you and asking if you're ok, when you're obviously not. She's wonderful. Another habit of hers is leaving everything to the last minute, like that time when she had her part 2 exams, she left her revision to the last minute, and almost missed the flight. But somehow she made it, and she passed her exam with flying colours. So proud of her that day, she was so nervous, pacing up and down, saying "Is the post here yet?" She didn't give the poor postman a chance to put the letters through the letterbox; as soon as she saw the postman walk down the drive she was out there, she met him half way down the drive. Those were the days. The good old days. I've pictured that day so many times now; the day when I stand at the altar, and watch her walk down the aisle, the smile on her face, it'll be the happiest day of our lives, she'll look spectacular; but then again, she always does. To me, she's truly an inspiration. The way she's battled through it all, and still she comes out smiling, I really don't know how she does it, I really don't. She's not one to throw in the towel, she'll always battle on through to the end, no matter what.
I've been inundated with cards and well wishes from people I've never met, from past patients, and people we used to work with, like Spencer and Max, to people like the postman and the milkman. Even the people down our street have brought cards and flowers, people we never met. It's amazing, to think that Lara has that effect on people, that people remember her for who she is and what she does. Haven't heard from her family though. I contacted them to tell them what had happened because I'd thought they'd had a right to know, but so fare, nothing. People approach me in the street, ask me if theres any news, or the usual "You know where I am if..." and "If you want anything, you know where I am...". Gets a bit boring after a while, but everyone's been so supportive. I'd heard they'd even held a vigil up at the church, and people were praying that she'd come back safe and sound. I really appreciate everything that people have done; I'm really grateful. But now the only thing that people can do is let me have some time alone with Lara, that's it. No-ones told me how the operation's going, but then people have said that no news is good news... right? The staff here are the best, so they'd tell me if there was anything wrong, like any complications or anything like that. She's so popular, yet I don't know if she ever knew just how popular. Well she'll have quite a welcoming party when she pulls through. The number of people who have asked after since she'd been admitted, thees been so many I've lost count already. There's been Bex, Anna, Nikki, Luke, Simon, Max who came in especially to see how she's doing, infact I think he's still here. Who else? Like I said theres been so many. Harry's gone back to the flat to get a bag of Lara's things, which should be ok. Everyone here's been great, I really can't thank them enough.People that Lara hasn't seen for a while have come back to offer their help and support, and the response has been fantastic.