Chapter 4
She shivered when she looked at the small, rectangular box on her bathroom counter. The box that could change her life. The box that could change everything.
She was jolted out of her thoughts when she heard the loud knocking at the door. Oh no, not now, she thought as she slowly got up from her spot on the edge of the bathtub.
She walked to her door and yelled, "Who is it?"
"It's me, Elliot," came the gruff reply.
She shook her head and sighed. Why did he have to come now?
She opened the door and rubbed her forehead.
"What do you want, Elliot?" she asked. "I'm tired."
"I just wanted to talk," he replied. "Can I come in?"
"El, can we do this later?" she asked him.
"Please, Liv, just give me a chance."
She sighed dejectedly. "Okay, come on in." She reluctantly opened the door wider to let him in.
He walked in and sunk into her overstuffed couch. He looked gaunt and pale. She briefly wondered what had happened to him before she sat on the couch beside him.
"What's wrong, El?" she asked him with concern in her voice. "You look like hell." She said to lighten the heavy mood.
"Kathy asked for a divorce," He said flatly.
Olivia's eyes widened with concern and pity. "What?" she said, her voice soft.
"She asked for a divorce," he repeated.
"Oh, El." Olivia said as she enfolded Elliot in a hug.
She stroked his back, and he gripped her tightly.
"Olivia, why?" he jerked back from the comfort and refuge of her arms. "We had been married for 20 years. How can she just throw that all away as if it means nothing?" he stood up and angrily wiped his tears away.
"Elliot," Olivia said and reached for him.
"No!" he yelled and thrust her away. "NO!" he yelled again.
Olivia stood there quietly, watching Elliot struggle to gain control of his emotions.
"Come here, El," Olivia whispered and stretched out her arms.
He came to her, and buried his face in her neck. She stroked his back lovingly.
"Just give me a second," he said quietly as he pulled away from the hug.
He strode to the washroom to wipe away his tears and to put himself together. She sank wearily into the couch. She was so tired. But Elliot needed her now, and she couldn't just turn away. After all, he had always been there for her.
She heard the door open behind her, but she didn't turn around. She just closed her eyes sleepily. When she heard the door slam, she jumped. She turned around slowly. What was wrong with him?
Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no. He stood there, anger blazing in his eyes, holding the pregnancy test box in his hand.
"What is this, Olivia?" he asked, elaborating each of the words, so he wouldn't become overly angry.
"It's…it's…you know what it is, Elliot." She whispered.
"When were you going to tell me about this, Olivia?" he asked heatedly.
"Elliot, I don't even know whether…whether I am. And if I am, why would it matter to you?"
"Why would it matter to me? Olivia, this is my child you're talking about!" he yelled furiously.
"Elliot, I can take care of myse-"
"This isn't about taking care of yourself, Olivia! Don't you see? You're so independent, and so stubborn, and I, of all people, know that. But if you are pregnant, it's my child! I'm not going to leave the child's responsibilities all on you! Don't you remember Olivia?" he said, losing some of the anger. "Don't you remember? I told you I would always be there for you." He whispered.
She sighed. "I don't even know if I am."
"Aren't you going to check?"
"Elliot, I think you better leave now." She said, with pain in her voice. "Please…just…I need to be alone."
"Liv, you can't do everything alone." He said affectionately.
"Please, Elliot. Leave," she whispered.
He hung his head, but reluctantly said, "Okay, Liv, whatever you like."
"Thank you, El," she said softly.
After he had left, Olivia slid down the wall and buried her face in her hands. She started to cry. Why did she ask him to leave? Why? When she was so alone, and had been for so long, why did she ask him to leave? She wanted someone there – she truly did.
She slowly got up from her desolate position against the wall and wiped away her tears. She trudged to the bathroom with the pregnancy test box in her hand. She had to do this. She had to be strong. She had to.