Ch 39: I once believed

The two made their way home to Gusu quickly, stopping only to eat a meal and for Lan Zhan to take a small breather. Lan Zhan had left the two unknown men bound in their room, sending butterfly messages to their respective Sects with instructions to come and fetch them before seeking an audience with ZeWu Jun about suitable punishments. Wei Ying complained a little about rushing home so fast. He enjoyed the food and alcohol outside of Gusu and he enjoyed the hustle and bustle of busy markets and shops that where not available around the Cloud Reccess. They eventually settled on Wei Ying buying an extra couple of bottles of wine during their break in travel. One he drank while they flew, dis-guarding just at the base of Gusu, the other he hid in his sleeve to take to the JingShi.

When they finally arrived home, even though both men felt like going straight to the JingShi to sleep, as they had very little sleep the past few nights, they headed straight to Lan XiChen's office. Knocking on the door gently they got no response so Wei Ying stepped forwards and banged loudly on the door in a way his more restrained husband would never even think of doing. After a moment the door opened almost silently, although the temper behind the movement would have shattered both the doors and the eardrums of those within listening distance, if they hadn't been stopped by a pale pair of hands before hitting the wall. Lan QiRen's face appeared in the doorway full of barely disguised disgust at someone from his own Sect having the complete lack of manners to bang on the Sect Leaders office door without something obvious happening, like the whole of the Cloud Reccess burning down (Again). One look at who was in front of him though and the unflappable Lan Elder let out a huff.

'I should have known only you would bang on this door!' He said, half resigned and half amused. 'I assume you two didn't tell us you were headed home for a reason?'

He glanced from one to the other as he spoke, clearly not expecting an answer, their actions already providing enough of a clue. However Wei Ying spoke up.

'Uncle I know we have told you we were coming back but this is important.'

Lan QiRen nodded and stepped aside allowing both men into the large room. By the desk stood Lan XiChen, next to him stood two disciples one clearly from YunMeng and the other from LanLing. Wei Ying stopped at this, unsure what to do next, how much to disclose. Lan Zhan however kept walking up to the desk on the small dais, his hand wrapping around Wei Ying's and practically dragging him forwards. The two nodded and bowed respectfully where required before Lan XiChen nodded to the two visiting disciples.

'Do we need privacy?' He asked diplomatically.

'For now yes'…...Lan Zhan spoke up. 'But as they are here, I would ask brother to send messages back to their Sects asking for a meeting about what we will inform you on.'

Lan XiChen simply nodded and sent the two visitors away with a verbal invite for a meeting in two days time. When the two had left he raised his hand and the inbuilt silencing wards sprang into place allowing the four men inside to speak privately.

'Well?.' Lan QiRen spoke up. 'Did you find anything out in your journey?'

'You could say that'….Wei Ying tried not to smirk but only semi succeeded. 'The things that have been happening will make a lot more sense when we tell you who we met.' Lan Zhan gave Wei Ying his look of get to the point please and while trying not to laugh he continued. 'Our third night there we were attacked in our room. Two of the men we didn't know, and Lan Zhan has sent them back to their Sects for punishment. The third however was very well known to us, and by us, it was Jin GuanYao.'

The silence that engulfed the room was almost a void of sound itself for a few moments as no one seemed to even breathe. None of the other three men glanced over at Lan XiChen who had turned almost rigid in shock at the news. Despite Jin GuanYao doing such horrible things years ago, despite what he had done to both his sworn brothers, XiChen couldn't bring himself to believe he was all bad. XiChen wanted to see the good in his sworn brother and had spent the past years trying to convince himself that maybe it was all a mistake, that given a second chance the way Wei Ying had been, Jin GuanYao would have taken a better path.

Glancing over at both Wanji and his brother-in-law XiChen felt the sting of tears in the corner of his eyes. He had spent the last years trying to what he had done wrong, how he had failed his sworn brother. It seemed Jin GuanYao had spent that time thinking on how he could get revenge. It was suddenly dawning on him that unlike Wei Ying who wanted to change and had someone, in Wanji, that he thought it was worth giving up any thoughts of revenge for. Jin GuanYao never treated either of his sworn brothers as family, never truly trusted them, despite their attempts to help. Unlike Wei Ying, Jin GuanYao could never give up on hate despite having a lot less to hate the world for than the former. He sighed quietly, but it echoed off the silent room.

'Are you sure?' He couldn't help asking.

'We wouldn't come back and tell you this if weren't sure' Wei Ying said honestly.

XiChen had known what the answer would be but he felt he had to ask anyway. He squared his shoulders from where they had unconsciously slumped forwards, trying to force his head up before he physically turned to face the other men. Having finally got as much control over himself as he was going to, he turned towards the others, addressing them all as a group.

'I am sorry I suddenly feel a little light headed. Continue your meeting I am going to go out for a walk and clear my mind.'

With the simple statement he walked slowly but confidently between his Uncle on one side and Wanji and Wei Ying on the other, before making his way out of the office. Lan QiRen looked over at his nephew and nephew-in-law with concern.

'It seems remembering how he was betrayed still affects brother' Lan Zhan said steadily.

Lan QiRen nodded in agreement just as Wei Ying laughed.

Both men looked at him like he had lost his mind.

'You think He is upset because he didn't see the betrayal coming?' Wei Ying asked like he was speaking of something completely obvious. When all he got was blank stares as a response he continued with a more educational tone. 'If he was still upset about the betrayal he wouldn't be looking like someone had hit him in the face with the butt of a spear. That look is because some part of him hoped the man he had trusted all those years was really misunderstood, that all he did was somehow not his own choice.' Wei Ying looked at the other two and nodded gently. 'I think it's best if I go out and speak to him. Lan Zhan, you can keep bringing Uncle up to date on what happened.'

Almost simultaneously the two Lans nodded and Wei Ying turned and followed his brother-in-laws steps out the door.

After a few twists and turns Wei Ying managed to find Lan XiChen. The elder jade was sat under a cluster of trees in a seldom used part of the Cloud Reccess. Despite this the small glade was still well maintained, trees trimmed, grass cleared on any leaves and twigs. Nothing ever went underneath the notice of those who provided the maintenance, in many ways they were as rigid with cleanliness as the Sect themselves. XiChen was sat on a patch of grass under the shade of one of the larger trees, staring out into space as if seeing nothing. He was obviously not paying attention to his surroundings, but then he didn't need to as his brother and Uncle would be the only ones who dared approach the Sect Leader when he obviously wanted solitude. Those two wouldn't approach out of respect, however Wei Ying was a completely different person.

Walking up behind an upset, armed and well trained cultivator was dangerous enough when they were aware of your presence, even more so in the current situation. Not like a little danger had ever stopped Wei Ying before! He did walk slowly towards his brother in law though, making no efforts to mask his steps or lessen the sound of his breathing. XiChen's shoulders straightened as the only sign he had heard someone approach, his head still slightly bowed.

'I know it is you Wei Ying' He spoke without turning his head. 'You are the only one who would approach me.'

Wei Ying fought back a laugh that had no place at the moment and carefully schooled his face into a neutral mask. He didn't respond but rather stepped up to his brother-in-law's side before sinking gently to the grass beside him. He didn't speak or move any closer, just sat and let the silence between them stretch as the both looked over the small glade. Everyone knew Wei Ying liked to talk, but he wasn't stupid he knew there was times when he got most out being quiet, like now. After a few moments XiChen sighed and spoke, still not looking over at him.

'You all must think I'm a fool for being this affected after so long.' XiChen sounded much older than his years in this moment and could no longer keep his head up feeling it give into gravity and plummet even further towards the floor.

Wei Ying shook his head unconsciously then spoke after realising the other man couldn't see.

'None of us think you are a fool. Lan Zhan and Uncle just aren't sure what to make of your actions that's all, they aren't used to seeing you like this. As for me….' He paused…..'I understand why you held out hope for so long and why hearing this is hurting you so much.'

This time Lan XiChen did turn his head to face Wei Ying. His eyes red rimmed where she had been holding back tears were the strongest evidence yet of the inner turmoil of the eldest Lan sibling. Wei Ying felt the urge to wrap his arm around his brother in law but clamped it down fiercely. The Lan's didn't like physical touch so that could cause more harm that it solved.

'You don't hate him?' Lan XiChen asked, his voice shaking slightly and not at all like the strong Sect Leader Wei Ying was used to. 'After all he did to you, to your family, to everyone you still don't hate him?'

Wei Ying smiled and gripped both hands in his robes, wishing he could lie, to make things better but knowing that the truth was the only thing that could do that right now.

'Part of me still hates him and always will.' He replied honestly. 'If it weren't for him I wouldn't have been hounded to my death in my teens and my sister wouldn't have died trying to save me. My nephew wouldn't have been an orphan raised by two Uncles only to realise one was the whole reason behind his families demise. So yes I will always hate him, not for myself though but for what he took away from others by never treating them like humans. However he always treated you differently. He always treated you with respect and, I believe, love. I know you loved him in return otherwise you wouldn't have let him become your bond brother. So you have nothing to feel bad about by feeling sad over the news'

Lan XiChen sighed, his head still lowered but his eyes fixed on Wei Ying as he spoke.

'I had the chance to clear my name and get my life back. I had the chance to become accepted and loved by a new family. No one can blame you for wanting everything that happened with him to be all one big misunderstanding like mine was. No one can blame you for wanting your brother back like Lan Zhan wanted me back all those years.'

'The difference is…..' XiChen spoke up before Wei Ying could say any more. 'The person Wanji had in his memory was innocent and worth waiting for. The person I had in my memory was just a figment of my imagination. I let myself be fooled by him all those years and I am still doing it now. When will I learn?

Wei Ying just smiled gently at his brother-in-law, who curved his lips upwards in response. Facing forwards again the two sat in companionable silence for a while, hoping their little slice of peace could last forever while at the same time knowing it would only be a matter of time before it was again shattered.