CHAPTER TWO – THE LOST CHAPTER?
"Oh my god, I don't know who I am anymore!"
"Shut up Sephy… you're so emo, why don't you go listen to Simple Plan."
Cloud and Sephiroth were lounging around in Cloud's family room, his mother was gone.
"And that bitch stole our material! Waaa."
"Ugh.. quit whining."
So they griped and complained to each other and then had great makeup sex.
Later that night…
"You know Sephy… I got this kickass movie from a friend, it's apparently scary to just have it. She said that the rumour behind it is that if you watch it, you'll die in seven days."
"Pop it in, biotch."
Cloud and Sephiroth sat together on his couch while they watched the movie. They saw quick flashing images of a girl in front of a mirror, a hole in the ground that seemed like it might be a well, then it showed the girl again and, "Holy crap, Sephy! It's AER-ASS!"
"NOOOO!"
No sooner than they had realized what they had seen, Aeris began to crawl through the TV screen, her limbs convoluted and her voice filled with phlegm and combobulation. Her head twitched and her eyes seemed to be black, concave holes in her face, with small amounts of pale blood trickling from the holes.
"Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy haaave yooooouuu fooorsaaakennnn meeee Clooooud?"
Sephy grabbed a broom and tried to beat Aeris away with the blunt end, but she crawled around on the floor quickly, like a cockroach.
"Thaaaat woooon't wooork myyyy deeear… Yooou seee, I neeeverrr gaaainnneeed myyy ullltimaaaate Liiimiiit Breeeak becaaause I diiied toooo sooon… Buuut nooow I'mmm baaack annnnd I'llll ussse ittt onnn yooooooooou!"
Sephiroth screamed and went into the fetal position while Cloud could only look on.
"GREEEAT GOSSSPEEEEL BIOOOOTCH!"
"NOOOO!" And then he was thrown back into Cloud's bedroom and fell asleep.
"Don't make me pop a cap." Said Cloud
"Juuuust tryyy itttt!" Aeris screamed.
Then, Yuffie popped down from the ceiling, handing Cloud the Omnislash manual, Knights of the Round and W-Summon. Then he activated these abilities, sending Aeris back into the movie.
Cloud saw Aeris crawling around in some dark hole, looking incredibly sad. Then, Cait Sith fell into the hole with her, jumping around her, shouting, "YAY A FRIEND!"
Still in a bad mood, Cloud walked in to his bedroom to see Sephiroth waking up. They promptly had angry sex.
When they were done, Barret rushed through the wall, and shot them hoes up.
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So R&R mah peeps!