a/n: Wow! thanks for all of the reviews! i'm glad that you all like it! sorry about the short chapters but it really did just come to me in spurts. but to appease all of you famished fanfic readers, i will post chapters 4 and 5 at the same time, cause they are both relativley short. alright with that said, here are a few warnings, nothing major but they have to be said: MAJOR Sam angst up ahead. that boy can vent like you have no idea. there is some swearing, so be warned. oh, and here be some minor spoilers for just about every episode that has aired so far, so if you havn't seen them and don't want a part of them to be ruined then you are either shit out of luck or just stop reading. but when i say that most of them are really minor, i really mean it. so if i were you i would just take my chances. thanks for reading! now enjoy!

Disclaimer: if i owned the Winchester boys, do you really think that they would still be driving around the country in that car instead of being home in bed with me? i think not. ;) but they are not mine, and so they ride...

Where were you?

Chapter 4:

Sam had been waiting a long time to get all of this off his chest. When neither Dean nor his father made a move to speak, he continued, his rage barley contained.

"Do you even know what our lives have been like for the past few months? What we've been going through? You don't have a clue! Where the hell have you been? Where were you when the thing that killed mom took the woman that I loved away from me? Where were you when we went back to your old house? Dean called you and begged, Dad, begged you to come and help us. Did you know that we saw mom? That she was the one who saved us? Where were you when I tried to kill my brother because some piece of shit spirit was manipulating my emotions? Did you know that Dean has officially been labeled as a murderer? No? He was taken by a shape-shifter who killed innocent people while he was walking around with Dean's face, and he came about his close to making me his next victim. Did you know that Dean is also officially dead? I have his fucking death certificate stuck in that god-forsaken journal of yours! Would you have even come or were you just too busy to come to your own son's funeral? Where were you when we almost died facing Bloody Mary? Or the Wendigo? Where the fuck were you when Dean's heart gave out, huh, and he was only given weeks to live? I almost lost him twice that week, Dad, once because of his heart and the other because of some psycho bitch who decided that she was going to play God. Know what we got from you? Nothing! Not even a fucking phone call to see how Dean was doing. What if I hadn't found Roy, huh? Would you have even cared? Would you have come? Jesus Christ Dad! I told you Dean was dying and that doesn't even warrant a phone call? Did you know that I have visions Dad? That I see people die horrific deaths in my sleep and wake up screaming, only to find out that what I thought was only a nightmare was real and there's no way for us to help them all? And that I can move things with my mind? No, because you weren't there! For any of it! And now you come back into your lives, and want us to drop what we're doing and go with you, because now you need us! What, we're only worthy of your attention when you want to give it? Why now, Dad? Why is it okay for us to help you now when you specifically told me last time that you did not want or need our help, that it was too dangerous?"

"Sam," John started, his voice soft but steady, "I am your father. I was just trying to keep you boys safe-"

"Don't you dare pull the father card on me!" Sam yelled, and the lamp went flying across the room and smashed against the wall.

Ah! the craziness! read on, if you can handle it...

But before you go on to chapter 5, please let me know what you think of this one first! PLEASE REVIEW! i want to know what you think!