a/n: okay so here it is, as promised, chapter 5. again this has MAJOR Sam angst, and i think i probably took some liberties with the events of their childhood, but you know, artistic lisense and all that. so i hope you guys enjoy and review! cause i love to hear what you guys think of the story. the reviews keep me motivated to keep writting, not to mention put a ridiculous looking grin on my face! so please, go ahead and make me look goofy!

Disclaimer: i'm getting really tired of writting that i don't own anything. i think that it's giving me a complex...

Where were you?

Chapter 5:

Sam was angry. No, Sam was beyond angry. He was furious. Dean couldn't remember ever seeing Sam like this, not even when Ellicott was messing with his emotions, not even when he and Dad had their falling out when Sam left for college. Dean had jumped to his feet when the lamp had gone flying past his head, and his eyes were glued to Sam as he continued.

"You were never a father! Dean was more of a father to me than you ever were! Instead of telling me bedtime stories you told me how to kill the things that lived in my closet! Instead of teaching me how to play soccer, you taught me how to identify different types of weapons! Shit Dad! By the time I was 12 I knew how to hunt, fight, and kill better than some of your old Marine buddies! What did you ever do for me? What did you ever do besides move us around from place to place, taking us away from what few friends we had been able to make? You weren't even able to always put food on the table! If you weren't pissing the money away on booze, then you were buying more ammunition or a new set of knives or, or something! Do you know how many lawns we had to mow or how many driveways we had to shovel just so that we wouldn't have to eat peanut butter and jelly every night?"

A chair went crashing against the wall. Dean stared at Sam in shock. Of course, he and Sam had talked about their childhood, if you could call it that, and yeah, Dean thought that it sucked some of the time, but Sam had never expressed the kind of anger that he was expressing now. Dean spared a glance over at their father. His expression was neutral, impossible to read in true Winchester fashion, but he was several shades paler than he had been at the beginning of this lovely conversation, and after listening to everything that Sam had been saying, Dean couldn't really seem to bring himself to care that much that the things Sam was saying were hurting their father. The fact of the matter was, they were true.

"I didn't learn any of the things that a son should learn from a father from you. For as long as I can remember, it's been Dean taking care of me, not you! Dean's the one that always made sure that I had a lunch packed and ready for school. Dean's the one who comforted me after I woke up screaming after having a nightmare. Dean showed me how to build my first snowman, how to ride my first bike. Dean always made sure that I had a warm coat in the winter, even if he had to give me his cause we didn't have any money left to buy a new one. Dean taught me how to drive. I was Dean I went to if I had girl problems. And it was Dean that picked me up and patched me up when I got injured on a hunt! You have done nothing but ruin our childhood and berate me for wanting a life outside of hunting. So tell me, Dad. Give me one good reason why we should be there for you, now."

Dean had to jump out of the way as the small desk slid across the floor and came within inches of pinning their father to the wall. John didn't even flinch. He looked first at Dean, then his gaze returned to Sam. The pause that followed was long and tension-ridden. And then at last, he spoke.

oooh, the suspense! oh that wicked, wicked firstorm! stay tuned, the last chapter will be up tomorrow, i swear on the Winchester boys!

but i won't put it up unless you REVIEW! cause yes i really can be that evil when i want to be! so click on the little review button and let me know what you think about the story, or what you think is going to happen, or you knw, just to say hi! its all good!