He had never known Masami to nap so much.

It was worrying.

"Are you sick?" asked Touichirou as he sat beside his wife on their bed. Her back was to him, she was laying down, and had been since breakfast.

"I'm tired. Do you need something?" said Masami. She was just tired, that was all. Touichirou was making something out of nothing. He did that sometimes. For a man as cold as he was, and he could be a very cold man sometimes, he sure could make something out of nothing. So what if she had been laying down a little more often than usual? He was around so it wasn't like the kids were unsupervised.

And it was about time he took an interest in his own children, anyway.

"No, not at the present moment but I am….concerned. You've been sleeping a lot lately. The children are worried that you've come down with something." Said Suzuki. He was worried, too, but he could only tell her once that he was concerned. Even saying that once had been too much. Concerned. She was the only being on this planet that he would ever admit that kind of weakness to.

"I'm not sick, just tired, ok?" asked Masami. She did not want to get into it with him. She had no idea where to start, for one thing, and if she did start up with him then her words would just fall on deaf ears. He never listened to her, not in the real way, because he just did not understand her on a fundamental level…it felt like that, anyway.

"Have you been sleeping badly? We could get a new bed-" said Suzuki already thinking of at least five different solutions to this problem…if it even was a problem. When it came to other people he was out of his element and he knew it. Masami wasn't just anyone…and it stung, a little, that she was so far beyond his understanding.

"I've been sleeping just fine at night, Touichirou, ok? Stop making something out of nothing. If you or one of the kids need something I'll get up but right now I just need to rest." Said Masami. Underneath the covers her phone was clutched in her hands. She wanted, for once, for her husband to leave her be. She had someone else she wanted to get back to.

And she was a terrible person for it.

She had made vows, a lot of them, when she married Touichirou…and she had broken them. She had broken promises, broken trust….and she wanted to do it again. Not the sex part…well yes the sex part…but more for the emotional aspect of it. Of him. Of the man in her life that was not her husband. She had thought that having Touichirou around more would have been better but even when he was there it was like he was a million miles away.

This was the first time in a long time that he was actually speaking to her.

Not about the house, not about the children, and not about what she needed to do for him. He was actually talking to her….and she was pushing him away. Too little too late, maybe. Or maybe she was just terrible. She knew how she got when she had been in bed for a while, how twisted that things could look, and she worried that she was twisting things right now. She had twisted things before, twisted them so badly that she had pushed away her own daughter….and now she was pushing her husband away. Or maybe it was him that had been pushing her away. She had been telling him for years now that she wanted more love, more intimacy, more of him….and he had always said ok but then put the whole responsibility of their intimate life on her shoulders.

Having to ask for her husband to kiss and cuddle her took a lot of the joy out of it.

Plus a lot of the time it seemed like he didn't even want to be there. Spontaneity. She needed spontaneity. She needed it or else it was just…nothing. Just her asking for things that she should not have had to be the only one asking for. She wondered, sometimes, if he even loved her. But that was just her getting it all twisted up into the worst thing possible.

He loved her in his own way.

A way which she was beginning to not care for at all. Not when she had someone who loved…who cared for her…in the regular way. The way which involved listening to her and speaking to her….which involved making an effort to read her….instead of just asking for a list of all of her emotional needs and how they needed to be fulfilled….

She hadn't seen him in so long.

They used to make dinner together. That was what she missed the most. When he would drop by with 'extra' food….and the kids would be so happy….and he'd listen to how everyone's day was and then tell them about his own…that had been just wonderful. The best. That had been the best and she was the worst for thinking that it was the best. She had her husband and he…he loved her in his own way. Even now that she was getting things all twisted up and wishing for another man to come into her house and into her life and take her away from this-

No. She wasn't going anywhere.

Even if her son had…could….she was not going anywhere. Even if she'd soon have another Touichirou on her hands she was not going anywhere. She loved her son and she was…she had been happy when she had gotten her powers. She had been so happy for him. He had spent his entire life wishing that he had powers like his big sister and now that he finally had them….now he could be just like his father and sister…and that was just…it was…it was…

It was fine.

"I don't think that this is nothing. I….the only time I remember you sleeping this often was when Sho was an infant. Neither of the children are infants, they're getting to be more and more self-sufficient each day, and I can't understand why you've been spending so much time in bed." Said Suzuki. He wanted to lay down next to her….but he stayed sitting. If he were to lay himself down then the next thing he would want to do would be to wrap an arm around her and pull her close and-

And other such things.

Weak things.

He shouldn't have needed her. He shouldn't have needed anyone. He was complete on his own. He was a full and complete being on his own…and he could believe that much more easily when he was alone. It was hard to remember that fact, that simple fact, when he was with her. Masami. His Masami. When they were together, or just near each other, he felt like a piece of himself was missing. She had it. He had given it to him, divided himself up, and given part of himself to her. He had done it without even realizing what had happened….

And he did not like it.

"Why do you even care?" asked Masami

"Because….because this is not normal behavior for you." Said Suzuki. He allowed himself to lean back just a little. He could not lie down. If he did then he would throw an arm around her…and if he did that then he would break off another little piece of himself and give it to her…and he had already broken so many pieces of himself off already…

He had to be a complete person on his own.

"What's the harm in me just laying here? Who am I hurting? The kids are fine, I can hear them playing in the yard, and you just said that you don't need anything. Why do you care if I just lay here in this bed?" asked Masami. He didn't see her as a whole and complete person, it felt like. He saw her in terms of what she could do for him. He saw as his wife, not as Masami. That was why he was so 'concerned' about her.

"There's no harm…but your company is missed. The children ask about you often." Said Suzuki. They asked him about Masami and when he said that she was resting they then asked him to take her place. He could deflect them by ordering them to play outside or to watch television or by allow them to play endless amounts of videogames….but that, all of that, was beginning to lose it's effect on them. They wanted their mother. Suzuki could not recall ever needing his mother as much as his children needed Masami. He was torn. On the one hand they needed to form healthy attachments but on the other hand he wanted his children to end up being as full and complete as he was.

As he tried to be.

Because he was not a whole and complete person. He was…he was Masami's person…and right now he was worried out of his mind. Part of him was. The part of him that he tried his hardest to exorcise. The part of him that he would have been better off without. He could not afford to be weak. He could not afford to be just like everyone else.

"What about you, huh? Do you miss me too?" asked Masami

"….yes." said Suzuki

"Then why not just say it? Why do you always have to be this way? Why can't you….why can't you just love me the way I love you? For who I am, not what I can do? I just….I wish that you could love me the way that I love you." Said Masami. She didn't have to turn around to know that he was puzzling over what she just said. She knew him. As far as he was concerned as long as he was happy then the state of their union was good.

"I don't want to be weak-" said Suzuki. He was not good at this sort of thing, not good at it at all. He wished that she would just write him out a list of directions or get him a book or something. Your Guide to Being a Good Husband. He wished that she would just…just understand him. Understand that he could not be weak like everyone else. That he had to be better, stronger, than everyone else. He was alone for a reason. He was the supreme being of this world….and that was who he had to be. That being could not be weak. That being could not just break off pieces of himself and just…just be incomplete….

He did not like this feeling.

"I don't think that you're weak. I could never think that. If you think that I see you as being weak then you're projecting your own feelings onto me." Said Masami quietly. If it was weak to text her in the middle of the day to see how she was doing then she wanted him to be weak. If it was weak to pull her close and ask her what was wrong then she wanted him weak enough that a stiff breeze could blow him down the street. If it was weak to stop by just because then she wanted him to be so weak that Shigeko could have beaten him in a fist fight.

"I…I don't…." said Suzuki because, well, what did one say to that? He was not projecting his own feelings onto her. No. She just…she just….he didn't even know. She just wasn't making sense. None of this made sense. The way she had been acting, lately, had not made any sense in a while…

People slept this much when they were either sick or hadn't been sleeping during the night.

But she said that she was not sick….

But maybe she just didn't know that she was sick. She might have just not realized it. Yes….that happened sometimes. Yes….he knew exactly what to do.

If his wife was sick then, of course, he would call the healer. What else could he do? He left Masami, called Fukuda, and told him that he needed to come right over and fix whatever was wrong with Masami. She had been like this since…he wasn't entirely sure. Since Son's birthday? Since Son awakened? Since…maybe since he set foot in this house all that time ago. This was not normal for her…it couldn't have been. He knew Masami. She had a fire inside of her, she did things, she did not lay down in bed all day and watch her life pass her by.

She did not make him feel like this.

She had never made him feel like this before….well she had, once, when she had been giving birth to Sho. There had been so much blood…and she had been in so much pain…and for a little bit he thought that he was going to lose her. He had felt like this, then, but maybe even more so. He was….he felt like he was losing her…but that made no sense.

Masami was his.

Masami was not his.

Fukuda made sure, every time that he visited the Suzuki house, to remind himself. To remind himself that none of this was his.

Coming to the gate. This was not his house.

Walking up the path. This was not his family.

Knocking on the door. Those were not his children.

Entering the genkan. Masami was not his wife.

These were the things he reminded himself every time he visited…though he had not visited in quite a while. The house is messier, a little, than Masami usually kept it. There are more of the kids' toys around…and also Sho got into the drawing paper again. The kid was singlehandedly responsible for the decimation of the rainforest….that little artist. Fukuda wanted to pick up his drawings, to see what had been captivating him lately, but he did not. He could not.

He was being ushered through the house.

And not by one of the kids.

"I have no idea what it could be but I trust that you'll fix it." Said Suzuki as he led Fukuda through his house…even though the man did not need to be led. No, he had made himself very comfortable in Suzuki's home the last time he had been overseas…and he exorcises that emotion. He had been asked to come over, that was all, and really it was Suzuki's own fault for not telling Fukuda that he did not need to take orders from the children.

It would never happen again, anyway.

Because Suzuki would not be going overseas again for as long as he could manage it. Son had finally awakened, he needed to be near for when he finally learned how to do…something. If his control ended up being as bad as Daughter's had been. As bad as Suzuki's had been in his own youth. Yes, he needed to be here in case something happened….even though it seemed as though nothing was going to happen. Even now he could only see the barest hints of Son's aura. He and Daughter were playing in the snow outside. Daughter shone so brightly…she almost totally eclipsed Son…and he chose not to think about that, either.

So many things in this world to upset him.

"I'm on it, boss." Said Fukuda. It was easy, actually, to deceive Suzuki. The man could not see past his own ego. As far as he was concerned the state of his life was fine. He had a wife who loved him and most of his employees/followers were loyal to him. Fukuda had never made any attempts on his life so, obviously, he was loyal. He didn't suspect a thing.

And he wouldn't, so long as Fukuda did nothing suspicious.

Which was why he made no attempt at seeing the kids…even though he could hear them. He wondered how they were doing. Sho had been dealing with some new feelings, Masami had said, about some boy from his class. It could have been nothing, it could have been the beginning of something, but no matter what it was Fukuda knew that he and Masami would always accept him for who he was. It still must have been pretty confusing for him, especially considering how heteronormative this country was. Poor Sho. Not an easy road ahead of him.

And not just because he had a crush on another boy.

Sho's powers had shown up, too, finally. Though not finally if one compared him to other espers. Even Fukuda himself hadn't come into his powers until middle school. He had no idea that anything had been different about him aside from the fact that he had never been sick once in his life and that he never scared and always healed very quickly. Sho had an aura, that was what Masami said anyway, and he hoped that his father wasn't pushing him too hard…

Of course he was.

Sho did not need that. Fukuda knew how Suzuki could be. He knew how sensitive Sho could be. He wasn't like his father in that way….or like his sister. He could hear and see Shigeko. He wondered how she was doing. He hadn't been able to walk her to school in so long. Suzuki Shigeko, first grader. That had been a happy day. He wondered if he'd be around for Sho's first day of elementary school. He hoped….but he didn't dare hope. He tried not to think about it. Sho was six now…and about half a year Shigeko would be seven….the time, it did fly….

Stop thinking about it.

"You'd better be." Said Suzuki. Masami was sick and now she would be better and he had nothing to worry about, no reason to feel this way, because soon she'd be fine. Everything would be fine.

Everything was fine.

Fukuda told himself that everything was fine. He told himself that when Suzuki led him to the bedroom door…to Masami. He tried not to remember. When a hug had turned into a kiss…turned into one…into two…into three…turned into so much more…..he did not think about that. About what had happened. About what he wished would happen again.

About what could never happen again.

"This could take a while." Said Fukuda as he entered the bedroom. He wished for once that his boss could take social cues…but he could not. He just lingered in the doorway. Not optimal. Masami was…he knew what it meant when she got like this. He knew that what she needed was someone to hold her, to listen to her, to talk to her. She needed….

What she needed he could not give her. Not unless he wanted to end up in a hole somewhere.

"Well?" asked Suzuki after a moment. He had been on the receiving end of Fukuda's healing before. It didn't take long…though he had never been terribly injured or ill before….

"She's asleep." Said Fukuda. She was so beautiful when she slept. So peaceful. Her face was so unguarded, so soft, and her eyelashes….her eyes….her everything. Her everything was…was everything.

"So wake her up if you need to." Said Suzuki. His eyes narrowed just a bit. A flare of one's aura could mean nothing or it could mean something….but that was insane. Masami was his and he was hers and that was how marriage worked. She did not even look at other men just like he did not even look at other women. That was what marriage was.

"…right…" said Fukuda. Well not this was worrying. How would she react if she woke up to him standing above her like that? What would she say? What would she say while her husband was lingering right there in the doorway?

He shook her awake.

Because not doing anything looked suspicious as hell.

He shook her awake. Softly. He didn't want to do this. He didn't want to wake her and ruin this…everything…that she was in that moment. But he has to wake her, to ruin this. He shakes her by the shoulder. Her shoulders are soft…though he cannot feel how soft now. He's feeling her shoulder through the blanket and her pajamas. One hand is clutching the blanket…her hands are so soft. So soft and beautiful. He wants to take that hand…he has taken that hand…he's taken that hand in his and brought it to his lips…and then he's pulled her close…and then….

She stirs.

"Hey...hey it's me." Said Fukuda softly. He eyes snapped open so fast he was sure she'd injure herself. She sat up quickly and drew her blanket up to her neck.

"What are you-" asked Masami. That was the only coherent thought in her head. One minute she had been staring at her phone wishing that he'd call or text or something….and for a moment she thinks that she may have wished too hard…because he's there. He's there and the thought that through the power of wishing could have brought him to her is truly absurd…but he's there and this….this is not good even though she wants this…BECAUSE she wants this….

"Your husband called me. He said that…he's worried about how long you've been in bed for." Said Fukuda. There's emphasis on the word husband and a darting of his eyes. She gets the picture. He feels his heart pounding in his chest. Maybe because she was so near….maybe because he could be caught at any time….

"Touichirou? Can you go to the kitchen and get me some pineapple juice? With ice and one of the kids' bendy straws? It would really make me happy…and make me feel better." asked Masami, a waver in her voice. No. They cannot be in the same room. She needed…she needed to be alone…alone with…

She didn't even know.

Well she did but she didn't want to think about it…about how she was…about who she was.

"Alright." Said Suzuki. Finally, a direct order…not that he took orders….but this he welcomed. She needed something that he could give and she had given him a time frame for when to do it. Not like how she told him that she wanted more affection but refused to tell him when she wanted this affection and in what quantity he was supposed to give it. He didn't much like fetching things for her but at least, now, she was making some sense.

Which meant that, maybe, she was getting better.

"He wants me to get better….heh." said Masami as she heard her husband walk away. Wow, the great and powerful Suzuki Touichirou did something to help her out. Someone mark the day.

"Masami…talk to me. We don't have a lot of time and I just…please talk to me." Said Fukuda. He sat on the bed beside her and took her hand…her impossibly soft hand. He dragged his thumb across the top of her hand, across each finger, but stopped at her wedding ring.

"We have all the time in the world. He's never in the kitchen. It'll take him a few hours to realize that we don't even have pineapple juice." Said Masami

"Sho still has the citrus thing?" asked Fukuda with a smile. She mirrored his.

"Yeah, I think he may even be allergic. He says that citrus fruits make his mouth itch. So, yeah, no pineapple juice for us. Plenty of milk though. I think Shigeko may have come from a dairy farm or something." Said Masami. She was mentioning that which could not be mentioned…and she didn't care. She was mentioning that which was must not have been mentioned to he who must not have been allowed to cross the threshold of her bedroom door…and she had to stop watching wizard movies with the kids….heh….heh-heh….

"What?" asked Fukuda nudging her a little.

"What about what?" said Masami, a smile still tugging at the corners of her lips. A foreign sensation.

"That smile. Come on, what's going on in that head of yours?" said Fukuda

"Nothing. Just…movies me and the kids watch. Have watched….I've been terrible to them lately." Said Masami

"I'm sure you haven't. You're a great mom and the kids love you." Said Fukuda

"They did….I've been no kind of mother to them. I could barely drag myself out of bed for Sho's birthday….he loved your gift, by the way. I had no idea that they made one hundred and twenty count boxes of crayons." said Masami

"Yeah…I saw his drawings as I came in. He really is talented…in a lot of ways." Said Fukuda

"Yeah…I should have known. I mean at the back of my head I knew that this was a possibility…with Touichirou as his father…but I guess that I thought that since he wasn't like Shigeko….he was like me." Said Masami. Fukuda decided to take a risk and put his arm around her.

"This isn't a bad thing. He's…Sho's a good boy. He won't…he takes after you when it comes to temperament. Not Suzuki. You. He won't grow up to be like his father. Not with you as a mother." Said Fukuda. Masami closed her eyes and leaned against him.

"I just…I hate myself sometimes. For feeling this way about my children…about my husband…about you…I just….I hate myself sometimes, I guess…." Said Masami. She closed her eyes. She didn't want to open them. If she did then…then she might cry. She was…she was so…she hated this feeling.

All of these feelings.

She was kissed.

"Don't. Don't ever say that. I never want to hear you say that again. Masami…please." Said Fukuda. He had just done the second stupidest thing he had ever done in his life….and if he had been alone with her he would have done the absolute stupidest thing he had ever done…again.

"But I…I ha-" said Masami

"No. Masami I…you know how I feel." Said Fukuda. They had never spoken about it. Feelings. Their feelings. His and hers. After that first night, that only night, he had been ushered out of the house in the morning…and they had both decided to never speak of it again….

And now he was speaking of it.

That which should not have been spoken of.

"I…I feel…." Said Masami. She didn't have the words for it. She didn't have the…she just couldn't. She just let herself be there with him.

"Better. Please, feel better, for me. If not for them, for all of them, for me." Said Fukuda softly. She was leaning against him. She didn't say a word. She just nodded. She took his hand in hers and nodded. He leaned down. She was so soft…so perfect…

An aura entered his range.

He stood up. He put a respectable amount of distance between the two of them. As much distance as would be normal but not so much that he had something to hide.

A glass levitated across the room.

"The children said that there wasn't any juice but Daughter said that strawberry milk is just as good. So here….and I'm glad to see you feeling better." Said Suzuki. Masami was sitting up. There was more color to her. She was breathing a lot heavier….

Good. She was better.

"I…I'll be on my way, then. Goodbye President Suzuki. Mrs. Suzuki." Said Fukuda as he left. He left before he could say something that he regretted.

Milk was not as good as juice.

The kids had names.

And Masami was….he honestly hoped that she had gotten just a little bit better.