{Memories to Remember}
"Where are you going?"
She must have heard him wrong, there was no way—
"I'm going to Anchorage for at least two days," her dad repeated, taking another bit of his lasagne, not noticing Bella's distress. "Have I told you yet how awesome your cooking is?"
Bella's heart beat a little faster as she blurted out, "You can't go there!"
Now her dad looked up at her with concern. "It will be perfectly safe, honey. Mark will be going too, and we are just there to see if a different perspective will progress the investigation. The pressure on the department there has increased ever since those other bodies were found."
"No." Bella shook her head furiously. "They can't send you, why are they sending you? You can't just go and" — she waved her arms around frantically — "search for a bunch of murderers!"
"Bella, breathe," her dad said. The worry in his voice effectively halted her in her movements. He continued, "I know it might sound scary, but I promise I'll be safe. It's all a part of my job. What is it about this that scares you?"
"I-I," Bella stuttered as she regained control of her breathing. Sighing, her shoulders sagged. "It's nothing."
Her dad did not look convinced; if anything, he seemed more troubled now. However, unlike Bella, he let it go. Whilst he finished off his plate, Bella's mind turned over the new information it had been given, and it would not stop bothering her. Because where her father believed her would be chasing a very human serial killer, she knew that the offender was anything but that.
Several of her supernatural friends would be chasing the guilty vampire at his side.
It was this last bit of knowledge that ended up reassuring Bella of Charlie's safety later that evening during a phone call with Tanya.
"We will be out there, in Anchorage, tracing the scent until Demetri and the others arrive from Volterra."
With the realisation that they would be near her dad, Bella could not help but ask, "Can you please keep an eye on my dad?"
"Of course, that has always been a part of our job description," Tanya joked. "No, but seriously, Aro has made it very clear to us that we should keep both you and your family safe. I will see to it that at least two of us are around him at all times."
"Thank you," Bella sighed as part of the burden slipped off her shoulders. "I probably won't sleep much while he's away anyway, but I feel better knowing you guys will be nearby."
Tanya hummed in acknowledgement. "You know what? Why don't you come over to our place when your dad leaves? Carmen, Irina and Kate would love to have you around."
Just like that, the plans for the weekend were made. After they said their goodbyes, Bella put down the phone and asked her dad for permission to stay over at the Denali's. He did not hesitate to say yes and although he did not speak it out loud, Bella was sure that he too felt more at ease knowing she would not be alone.
That Friday afternoon Bella drove her dad's old red truck to the Denali residence, where Carmen welcomed her with open arms.
"Hey Bella," the woman greeted her, giving a careful hug. "How are you coping?"
"I'm doing alright," Bella muttered, avoiding Carmen's gaze as she extracted herself from the cold embrace. "Thank you for letting me stay with you."
"Of course! It's always a joy to have you here," Carmen replied, deciding not to comment on Bella's obvious lie. "Irina is in the kitchen, I believe she has been experimenting with some cooking today."
Bella smiled and tried to lighten the mood while she took off her winter gear and dropped the overnight bag next to her shoes. "Should I be scared?"
Carmen let out a warm laugh. "I do think she has yet to burn anything. Let's see what happens and pray the house will still be standing at the end of the day."
"I heard that!" Irina yelled from the kitchen.
Bella followed the voice and found Irina leaning over the stove, peering into the big pan filled with who knows what. As she felt Bella's gaze, she looked up with a grin. "Good afternoon."
"Hi," Bella said, sniffing the air when the smell of Irina's cooking assaulted her. It was such a distinct scent that she wrinkled her nose in confusion. "What are you making?"
"Asian style chicken wings," Irina answered. "I was watching TV and they were preparing it on one of those cooking shows you like to watch. I felt like giving it a try today, it's not as if I had something better to do."
Bella's stomach churned when she finally placed the smell. Giving Irina a tight smile and a forced "nice", she stepped out into the hallway and took a few deep breaths to calm both her stomach and her mind.
"Bella?"
Her eyes shot up to find Carmen standing in the doorway that led to the living room.
"I'm alright," Bella lied once again. "I was just going to look for Kate. Is she outside?"
"I believe she is in the shed at the moment," Carmen told her with a troubled expression.
"Thanks," Bella said, ignoring the guilt she felt. Making her way over to the front door, she slipped into her shoes and had her hand on the doorknob when she halted at Carmen's voice.
"Put on a coat!"
A small smile crept up on Bella's face and she sighed loudly for the dramatic effect before grabbing her jacket from the coat rack. Pulling the wooden door shut behind her, she started on her way to the shed in the Denali's massive backyard.
The fifteen-minute walk across the icy plain helped to quiet down the voices in hear head and she arrived at the wooden building feeling less loaded. Out of courtesy, she knocked on the door, letting herself in at Kate's shout. Once her eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, she sought out Kate's familiar form, but she was nowhere to be seen.
Without warning, Kate popped up from under the working bench at the far end of the workshop, holding up a tiny screwdriver in victory. "Ha! I found the little sucker."
Bella glanced at the materials stalled out in front of her and frowned. "What are you doing?"
"I want to try and install some windscreen wipers on a pair of glasses." At Bella's incredulous look, Kate shrugged. "I'm bored."
"Alright," Bella snorted. She closed the door and shrugged off her coat, throwing it on a stool in front of the bench whilst taking seat on another.
Kate gave her a once-over as her expression turned serious. "What's wrong, girl? You look pale. Well, more than usual."
"It's stupid." Bella shook her head at Kate's piercing gaze and was suddenly very interested in the patterns on the floor. "It's noting, really."
Kate put down the screwdriver and walked around the workbench. Her hand came up to nudge Bella's chin as to make the girl met her eyes.
"I know it's not nothing, so don't give me that bullshit," she said softly. "It's okay if you do not wish to talk about it, but please know you always can. We're all here for you."
Bella kept silent when the hand fell away and Kate made her way back over to her project. Bella's eyes followed the busy hands and their careful hold on the glasses as they got back to working.
"Irina was cooking," Bella said after a moment of silence. She waited for Kate to make a crude comment about Irina's lack of skills, but was instead met with quiet whilst Kate briefly halted in her movements before going on.
Bella continued. "I recognised the smell from something, though I didn't know what from until she told me what it was and, well, I guess it unnerved me." She took in a deep breath. "It's stupid, it feels stupid, but I've had that meal once before and it was— it was in the week before we went to Italy. During dinner that night, my— Harriet brought up that she and Philip wanted me to go to therapy once we returned from vacation."
Bella wrung her hands together tightly as her stomach wound up. She could still vividly remember the sense of foreboding that her fourteen-year-old self had picked up on.
"They told me— they said it was time I would do something about the so-called 'unnatural urges' I had. They were going to send me to conversion therapy, Kate."
The tiny screwdriver snapped in half with a resounding crack and Bella looked up at Kate whilst she tried to hold her tears at bay. However, the compassion she found in Kate's eyes broke her and she was soon crying into her hands. She did not stop when she was carefully drawn into an embrace.
"I knew this guy from school, who went there," she found herself spilling with a thick voice. "He was never the same again and I knew I did not want to live like that. I— Hell, at that point I didn't want to live at all."
Kate's arms tightened around her ever so slightly and Bella breathed in the calming scent before choking out, "I went to Italy, but I never planned on coming back."
"I'm so glad you did come back," Kate whispered hoarsely.
Bella briefly closed her eyes.
"Me too."
"I still feel like it's stupid," Bella commented as she browsed the shelves of the hardware store.
"What?" Kate asked, picking up a pack of screwdrivers for inspection.
"Just that such a mundane thing set me off."
Kate sighed. "Memories have the ability to surprise you like that at times. I think it's understandable that your mind linked that particular smell to a traumatic experience, there's nothing stupid about that. I've been reminded of something that happened decades ago by a smell, a picture, or even a song at times. The brain is a weird organ."
"And when infused with venom, it gets even weirder."
Kate whirled around to find Bella grinning at her. "Why, you little-"
"Hi Bella! Hi Kate!"
"Alice!" Bella exclaimed as Alice walked into their aisle. "What are you doing here?"
"Just getting some material to fix up the hole in the wall of Rose and Emmett's room," Alice said with a smile.
Bella quirked an eyebrow. "How did that happen?"
"Trust me," a booming voice spoke. Bella turned around to see the huge form that was Emmett. "You don't want to know."
"Oh," Bella answered, before realisation dawned on her and a dark red blush crept up on her cheeks. "Oh!"
Emmett threw his head back and let out a laugh. "Your face kind of looks like a tomato now!"
"Emmett, don't be so mean!" Alice scolded, though she too was sporting a grin. "I think her blush is cute!"
If possible, Bella's face heated up even more and she groaned as Kate joined Emmett in his laughter. She cursed her body for betraying her and snatched the screwdrivers out of Kate's hands.
"Let's go and pay for this," she said, grabbing Kate's sleeve to pull her along.
"Wait, Bella!" Alice called out, making her halt in her steps. A second later Alice stood in front of her. "Would you like to get together later this weekend?"
"I'm sorry, I can't, I'm staying with the Denalis for a few days," Bella said apologetically.
"Oh, well, that's alright," Alice answered, though her shoulders slumped a bit.
"We would not mind having you over at our house, if you want to come?" Kate proposed.
Alice perked up. "I'd love that!"
Kate and Alice looked over at Bella simultaneously. She simply shrugged. "Sure, why not?"
Later that day Bella found herself texting back and forth with Alice during dinner — dinner which consisted of take-out tacos. When she and Kate had arrived back home, all remains of Irina's cooking had disappeared and she had decided not to comment on it.
An incoming message distracted Bella from the reply she was typing to Alice's plans. Without much thought she opened it, but once she had read it, she sagged into her chair with a sigh, closing her eyes.
Irina looked up from her book. "What's wrong?"
"Dad has been asked to stay in Anchorage for another day."
"Tanya and the others will keep him safe," Irina reassured her. "You know that, don't you?"
"I do," Bella said, though she felt conflicted. "I just can't help but worry for him."
Despite that fact that her bed at the Denalis was terribly comfy and her head felt heavy after such an exhausting day, Bella lay awake for hours on end that night. She stared up at the ceiling as her mind summoned up hundreds of situations in which her dad got hurt. Logically, she knew he was perfectly safe, but the scenes kept her busy until she finally fell into a fitful sleep in the early morning hours.
When Bella was slowly pulled back to the world of the living — and the undead, of course — she felt as if she had only slept a few short hours. A little peek at the alarm clock on her nightstand confirmed as much and she groaned, rolling over to bury herself deeper into her comforter. There was no way she was getting up right now.
A tinkling laugh broke through her sleepy haze and she frowned in confusion. That was, until she felt an icy-cold hand on her neck and she shot upright with a scream.
"Holy shit!" Her eyes soon fell upon the offender. "Alice! What are you doing here?"
"It's ten," Alice chimed, grinning devilishly. "I just arrived, but you were still asleep! So, I thought I'd help you to wake up."
Bella was not pleased — she was never in the best of moods right after waking up — but the snarky reply died on her tongue with one look at the excited expression on Alice's face. And then she remembered she had just woken up. She could not imagine what she must look like to the impeccable vampire.
It was as if Alice had read her mind. "I love the hair!"
Instead of burying herself underneath the covers, like she wanted to do, Bella simply groaned in defeat and hid her face in her hands. "Thanks."
"Well, now that you're awake, I think I'll be going back downstairs," Alice said, shifting from her spot at the edge of the bed. "I'll be waiting for you, so don't even think about going back to sleep!"
Bella did not think she would have been able to fall asleep, had she wanted to. Shivers ran along her spine as she got up from her warm bed. She quickly grabbed some clean clothes from her bag to change into.
True to her word, Alice was waiting for her in the kitchen when Bella came downstairs, fully clothed and with tamed hair.
"Good morning again," Alice said, receiving a small smile from Bella, who went over to the kitchen counter to make herself a bowl of cereal.
"So," Bella said when she took a seat at the table with her breakfast. "What are the plans for today?"
"Let's first get our homework out of the way," Alice suggested. She watched in fascination as Bella ate her cereal, before continuing. "And then we can just see what we want to do? Maybe we could watch a movie, if you'd like?"
Bella shrugged. "Sounds good."
"What kind of movies do you like?"
"There's actually a lot I enjoy," Bella said, and joked, "Why don't you take a look into the future and see what we'll watch?"
"My gift doesn't quite work like that," Alice laughed. "People have got to make a choice first for me to see the definite outcome. Not that it would work for you."
Bella's heart jumped in her chest. "Why not?"
"I can't see you," Allice said, looking down and tracing her finger along the ridges of the wooden table. "It's not like there's a big black space where you should be, or something, but whenever I take a look into the future, you're just not there."
"I-" Bella started, licking her lips. "I can't see you either. Not when I touch you, not when I look you in the eye. There's not even that weird buzzing static that most vampires are surrounded by."
"I'd figured," Alice hummed.
"I'm sorry you can't see me," Bella offered. "It must be hard to predict things when I mess up your visions."
"I don't mind," Alice replied with so much conviction that Bella could not doubt the sincerity of her answer. "It's weird, and different most certainly, but it doesn't bother me as much as it probably should. It's actually kind of refreshing, not knowing what you will say or do." She looked up and met Bella's gaze with sparkling eyes. Deep within Bella's stomach, something fluttered as Alice spoke her next words. "I must say that I have come to enjoy surprises."
"I wish we could choose which memories to remember."
A/N: I'm finally back with another chapter! I'm sorry for the long wait, but since I've returned from my stay in the land of koalas and spiders, I have been very busy with school. Either way, here you are.
This chapter is perhaps quite a heavy one, especially with Bella's revelation. Sadly, conversion therapy (where they try to forcibly change someone's gender expression or sexuality) is still a reality in the 21st century. To make things clear: no, Bella did not end up going there, as she went to Italy where she (literally) bumped into our vampires who offered her a way out of both options. The trauma that her past left, however, is something Bella has to deal with on a daily basis.
While some are chasing a serial killer, our Bella and Alice are also finally having some time to bond. Next chapter, Angela will make another appearance and the tension between our love birds will rise :)
Please let me know what your thoughts on this chapter are, I love to hear what you think! (even if it's just about how awful I am at updating regularly ;)) Also, do not hesitate to point out any mistakes I made. Until next time,
- Laura