Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1is owned by MGM studios. The song Everything You Want is owned by Vertical Horizon. This songfic is made only for my pleasure and for no one's profit. DON'T SUE ME!
Note: This is my version of what Carter was thinking during the episode of Grace from season seven. I only saw the episode once and have a very vague understanding of what happened. Thus, if there are some apparent inconsistencies, blame it on my poor addled brain and faulty memory. This is blatantly JackSam, because, in my opinion, that is the only combination that there should be (I HATE PETE WITH A VENGEANCE!). All lyrics from the song are in Italics. This is also the only even slightly romantic story that I've ever written…strange… if you enjoy it, please review. If you hate it, GO AWAY!
I Need to Tell You…
Somewhere there's speaking.
The darkness that had encased her slowly pulled back. Her head hurt. No, that was an understatement. Her head was pounding like a three-hundred pound gorilla had taken a sledge hammer to it.
It's already coming in.
She gently touched the goose egg attached to the back of her head and winced. How did that happen? The room she was lying in was familiar but she couldn't place it.
Oh and it's rising at the back of your mind.
The Prometheus. She was in the engine room of the Prometheus. She had been trying to restore power to the reactor and then…
You never could get it, unless you were fed it.
Why was it so quiet? She could hear the silent pounding in her head, but no other sounds. It was as if she were alone. But that couldn't be right…
Now you're here and you don't know why.
Where is the crew?
But under skinned knees and the skid marks,
She began to wander the decks of the Prometheus, searching for someone, anyone who was still here. The loneliness began to get to her, or was that the pounding in her head? The chance to fly with the Prometheus had once seemed a great opportunity. To be able to experience hyperspacial flight, and to keep her engines from overheating, had been the thrill of a lifetime. She always loved the prospect of space-flight, even to the point of applying for NASA; and now here she was, flying farther than anyone had ever dreamed possible. And she was lonely. Oh the crew had been great: respectful, helpful, quick to learn, all that they should be. But she missed the camaraderie that she had on SG-1.
Past the places where you used to learn,
She wandered up to the bridge and stared out into the cloud. She remembered that.
If we run into the cloud, it may buy us enough time for the reactor to cool.
She had been in engineering when the alien ship fired its parting shot. That's how she bumped her head. But where is everyone else?
You howl and listen, listen and wait for
The ship's klaxon sounded, the hull was being breached by the cloud and she had very little time. her only hope was to fix the reactor to get her out of the cloud. She turned off the bridge and raced back down to engineering. As she ran she saw a figure out of the corner of her eye. She stopped and retraced her steps looking for whoever it was.
The echoes of angels who won't return.
But no one was there.
You're waiting for someone to put you together.
The engines were a mess. Something in the cloud's makeup was interfering with the Naquedah reaction. She had precious little power left from the flight and dwindling time to save the Prometheus.
You're waiting for someone to push you away.
And she kept blacking out. The effects of her fall into the bulkhead kept coming back to haunt her. She would be perfectly fine, except for the headache, and then keel over into oblivion. When her subconscious came it brought weird dreams. She saw a little girl dressed in white. The figure she saw before? She didn't know, and had no time to find out, for the girl disappeared. Then her father would come and talk to her, as would Daniel and Teal'c.
There's always another wound to discover;
They told her differing views about what was going on. Her mind was being probed, the crew had been abducted, the cloud was a sentient being. She was confused, but elated. As long as her eyes were closed, she wasn't alone. Those closest to her were with her…
There's always something more you wish he'd say.
But someone was missing. And she still felt alone.
But you'll just sit tight and watch it unwind. It's only what you're asking for.
She was running out of time, and her feelings were getting in her way.
And you'll be just fine with all of your time. It's only what you're waiting for.
She kept seeing the little girl in white, flitting through the ship, even when she wasn't unconscious. Sitting in the captain's chair. Dancing in the engine room. Running in the halls. Blowing bubbles in the mess hall…
Blowing bubbles?
Out of the island, into the highway, past the places where you might have turned.
She had an idea and quickly began to set it up. But before she could finalize it, she blacked out once again.
You never did notice but you still hide away the anger of angels who won't return.
She saw the little girl running past a solitary figure standing before her.
She smiled.
He's everything you want, He's everything you need,
He's everything inside of you that you wish you could be.
He says all the right things at exactly the right time.
Every fiber of her being ached, she missed him so.
But he means nothing to you and you don't know why.
Why do I bury this inside of me?
She could see her longing reflected in those eyes.
I am everything you want, I am everything you need,
I am everything inside of you that you wish you could be.
I say all the right things at exactly the right time.
But I mean nothing to you and I don't know why.
But you do mean something to me; you mean everything to me. I've just never told you.
I just need grace to tell you...