Chapter 43 – Back to School

The end of the holidays came too soon. Anna found she hadn't had much of a holiday. She had spent the last few days hurriedly doing homework and packing. She had had a lot of Owls from Lupin, all of the letters lay unopened in the bottom of her trunk. The night before they left Anna had gotten her father, Ron, Hermione Remus Lupin and Sirius Black together. She had told them what Wormtail had done for her, Sirius said as soon as she had finished: "Merlin that is really annoying just as I was beginning to hate him on new levels."

"So he turned out alright in the end," Remus added. Harry however sat in silence, Anna knew he was thanking Merlin he had save Pettigrew's life back when he was 13. When everyone had gone Anna and Harry sat alone he had said to her.

"I have never been so grateful for anything I did back when I was that age."

Harry and Anna made their way to platform 9 ¾ the next morning. Anna's heart was racing the platform was bringing back too many painful memories. She quickly walked past the bench she had been sitting on when the hand had come from behind her and went through the gate. The scarlet steam engine met their eyes. Harry helped Anna put her trunk onto the train.

"I'm not going to be teaching this year, neither is Ginny," Harry told Anna just before she got on the train.

"Why not?"

"I am going to be working with Ron as an Auror and Ginny is pregnant so she can't teach," Harry replied. Feeling a little relieved and upset at the same time Anna nodded, said goodbye, and got the train. She found a compartment by herself. The train started to move and Anna found herself still alone. Many people looked in her window and hurried passed. The door slid open and Remus walked in.

"Do you mind?" He asked. Anna shook her head and he sat down. Soon Nicky joined them and Anna watched as Remus and Nicky talked adamantly about their summer, only did they take a break when the trolley came by. She noticed now how close they had become since she had seen them last. Anna didn't say much during the trip and it went uneventfully.

As the castle came into focus before her she felt a weight being lifted off her. She would be safe in there. Voldemort was scared of Dumbledore and Hogwarts was well protected. However, as she made her way into the Great Hall the feeling of unease and loneliness decreased only slightly. It didn't help that she had eyes on her and whispers following her all the way up to where she sat on the Gryffindor table. If she thought her uncomfortable ness would lessen when she sat down she was wrong. The only thing she knew would help her now was a certain blond haired boy, but she wasn't going to let that happen no matter how much she wanted it. She had to prove she didn't need him.

After the sorting Professor Dumbledore stood up and introduced the new teachers. Anna noticed Ginny's ex fiancée Sean was not there either.

"Oliver Wood is our new flying teacher." Nicky groaned beside Anna. "Professor Black is our new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher." Remus and James looked at the table and didn't say anything. "And our new care of Magical Creatures teacher is Professor Weasley." It was Charlie Weasley and all the Weasley children groaned. Lily, who had finished the year before, would have loved to be taught by Charlie Weasley, he was her favorite uncle.

Anna didn't speak to anyone throughout dinner glad for all the talk around her. This meant she got to listen to everybody else and not think about what happened to her. It all seemed so much more real now she was back at school. Even though it had seemed like a bad dream, it was a nightmare she couldn't get out of her head. The only person who had the slightest idea what she was going through, her dad, wasn't here to help her anymore. She was on her own.

After the feast Anna got up and walked slowly back towards Gryffindor tower trying to avoid the crowds.

"Hey Potter," someone shouted as she reached the portrait hole. It took her a minute to realize someone was calling her name. She turned around annoyed at being address like that. Feeling the need to let of some unshed anger she snapped back.

"What?"

"What was it like being held captive," a Slytherin boy asked. She opened her mouth to say something but before she could someone else said something.

"I don't think that's any of your business," a voice from behind her said. "Now get to your own common room. And don't even think of asking anything like that again. Unless you want to deal with me." Anna turned around and looked Lupin straight in the eye. The tension between them could have been cut with Gryffindors sword.

"Thanks," she said and walked past him to the dormitory wishing he would stop her, but in another way thankful for being left alone at the same time. She fell on the bed pulling the hangings tears filled her eyes and she cried herself to sleep, wishing she could be with her dad or Lupin, she needed someone to hug. Or at least just to forget everything.

During the last few weeks of the summer Anna had made a promise to herself to find someway to kill Voldemort. She had to now; she had nothing else to live for. She had already started going through all the tried and failed attempts trying to see where other people went wrong. Unfortunately they weren't all listed in one place. The main flaw in all the attempts were that they saw Voldemort as human, that he could be killed by a curse. He wasn't and he couldn't be. Even Harry had made this mistake. Anna had an idea but she wasn't sure if it had been tired before or even thought of before. That's what she was looking for.

The first week of school Anna buried herself in research. Every spare moment she had was spent in the library looking up things or reading the books she had ordered. She hardly spoke to anyone and if she did it was only a few words. She avoided the Great Hall at meal times eating after everyone left or before they got their. She also stayed away from the common room and only sat their after the library closed.

A few days into the term Remus sought Anna out in her usual spot in the library.

"Anna," she jumped at the sound of her name.

"Yes Remus," she replied.

"I just wanted to tell you that Quidditch practice starts on Saturday at 7am," he said. Anna put her book down making sure the title was covered up. He really thought she would still play Quidditch.

"Remus, I can't play anymore," she told him levelly.

"What do you mean can't?"

"Well I have other things to do,"

"So it's not physically impossible for you to play?"

"Well… no but I just have so much on my mind at the moment and its N.E.W.T'S this year and with everything that happened I just don't feel like it anymore," she replied trying to keep her voice steady with no emotion. She really did want to play but she didn't feel safe anymore, not with all those people watching her.

"Anna, I have N.E.W.T's as well, and playing Quidditch will take your mind of whatever your thinking about, use it as an escape from everything. Remember how it felt the first time you flew? I remember watching you, I can tell you loved it! I won't take no for an answer and if you want to quit the team you have to go to McGonagall and then Dumbledore! So I will see you at the Quidditch Pitch Saturday at 7am!" With that Remus stood up and left the library earning a serve glare from Madam Pince.

Anna was up researching until 2am the Friday night and didn't sleep well, once again reliving her summer. So when she got up on Saturday she wasn't at her best. Well, she thought, maybe Remus will chuck me off the team for playing so badly today! She walked slowly down to the Quidditch changing rooms, trying to take as much time as possible so she was late. When she got there everyone else was already there, Remus, Kayle, Nicky, James, Sirius and Lupin. It was obvious when she walked in Remus was uncertain whether she would show up or not.

"Good morning," Remus said cheerfully, when Anna had sat down, earning glares from the rest of the team. "Ok well we are going to practice every day until our match, so get used to it. Don't worry it won't cut into your studying time we will practice from 5am to 7am."

"What! You have got to be kidding," James exclaimed.

"No I am not kidding, we have a good team this year and if anyone doesn't want to practice then they can leave the team," he looked around at them as though daring anyone to get up and leave. Anna looked up at him and started to get up.

"Besides you, sit down!" He said rolling his eyes.

"Ok then let's go practice." Remus left the changing rooms leaving the others to talk amongst themselves for a bit.

"He's gone insane," James said shaking his head.

"He used to be nice, remember that James?" Kayle said.

"I have lived with him all my life I have never known him to be that obsessive before," James Replied.

"Never?" she asked shocked. James shook his head.

"Would you lot get outside now!" Remus yelled from outside. James and Kayle walked out together talking about Remus, Anna stayed behind for a few seconds before following Sirius out.

15 minutes later Anna found herself up in the air searching for the snitch. She noticed Lupin flying toward her a few times but she speed of in the opposite direction pretending she had seen the snitch. She couldn't be around him with out wanting to tell him she still loved him.

2 hours later the team ambled back inside cold and sweaty. As the rest of the team went to the great hall for breakfast, Anna went to the library underlining passages, making notes on her parchment and writing down page numbers for a way to destroy Voldemort.

"I know you can do better," Remus said sitting down opposite her in the library making her jump slightly.

"Yeah and you used to be really hard to wake up in the morning," Anna replied. Remus grinned in spite himself and shook his head.

"Well I have a reason to be up now I get to boss people around. And I get to tell my team members that they are not playing to their best standards. I know this said member can do a lot better."

"Yeah, well got things on my mind," she said shortly.

"I know you do, that's why I wanted to talk to you," he stopped as she looked up at him.

"I know what you are going to say and I can't alright," she said. "I told you I shouldn't be on the team."

"Well if you think you can play like you played today and get away with it you have another thing coming. You want to play. You are going to play. I won't let you quit and I won't let you slack of. So as your captain I am suggesting you talk to another member of the team and sort things out with him!"

"It's not that simple," she said shaking her head.

"Just think about it, you will feel a whole lot better if you have nothing to think about except catching the snitch." He said and got up to leave. Anna sat thinking. Why did they want to know? It wouldn't be good for anybody to know. They would say how sorry they were it happened to her and they would know how she felt, but they would have no idea and that would annoy her. She had to do her research, find an answer and pass her N.E.W.T'S that's all why couldn't they just accept that. She didn't need anyone interfering with it all.